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(SeattlePI)   Guard John Moffitt is the latest Seahawks player to get into trouble for his urine - but this time, it has nothing to do with a test for performance-enhancing drugs   (blog.seattlepi.com) divider line 24
    More: Dumbass, Seahawks, John Moffitt, Nick Eaton, police procedurals  
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1257 clicks; posted to Sports » on 30 May 2013 at 3:03 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



24 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-05-30 02:45:20 PM  
I'm such a loser. I read that as "Grand Moff Tarkin" at first glance. I probably would've read the article for that.
 
2013-05-30 02:52:23 PM  
thecollegeguidebook.files.wordpress.com

Urine know nothing, John Moffitt
 
2013-05-30 03:05:16 PM  
What was he supposed to hold it all that time? You can really hurt yourself that way.
 
2013-05-30 03:20:11 PM  

js34603: What was he supposed to hold it all that time? You can really hurt yourself that way.


Going to a place where he shouldn't have been in the first place would be a good start.

Besides, there are tons of places to drain the lizard (fast food joints, restaurants, stores) around, but not in Bellevue Square.
 
2013-05-30 03:28:34 PM  

LessO2: js34603: What was he supposed to hold it all that time? You can really hurt yourself that way.

Going to a place where he shouldn't have been in the first place would be a good start.

Besides, there are tons of places to drain the lizard (fast food joints, restaurants, stores) around, but not in Bellevue Square.


Maybe he was lost in the parking deck, couldn't find his car and really had to go.

Plus Elaine had a goldfish in a bag that was running out of air.
 
2013-05-30 03:36:23 PM  
I feel bad for people that don't get Seinfeld references. :/

/also, the actual story is really really really old news...old enough that the news this time is that the case finally went to court.
 
2013-05-30 03:43:21 PM  
Banned from Bellevue Square? Sounds like a blessing
 
2013-05-30 03:44:47 PM  
Read this as Grand Moff Tatkin.

So like some weird Grand Moff Joseph from the wrestling friends and Grand Moff Tarkin.

/yes I am married
//yes to a girl
///no she isn;t a cow
 
2013-05-30 03:51:12 PM  

IAmRight: I feel bad for people that don't get Seinfeld references. :/

/also, the actual story is really really really old news...old enough that the news this time is that the case finally went to court.



Seinfeld sucks ass.
 
2013-05-30 03:52:36 PM  
If this keeps up my 'Hawks are going to be using their second string guys for the first few games. Not the best way to start the season in which they are going to win the Super Bowl.

/a guy can dream can't he?
//Seahawks and Niners in the Conf. Championship at least.
 
2013-05-30 03:53:00 PM  
Of course, Moffitt is one of the players on the team who have gotten into trouble for their urine the other way.  He also has a history of eating snot.

/I say cut his ass, he's not even that good
 
2013-05-30 04:15:34 PM  
Why was he barred from Bellevue Square mall and Kemper Freeman properties?
 
2013-05-30 04:24:32 PM  

browneye: Why was he barred from Bellevue Square mall and Kemper Freeman properties?


Probably because he has facial hair.

For the most part, the guys you see at Bellevue Square mall are Patrick Batemen clones living in the Bellevue Towers.
 
2013-05-30 04:39:27 PM  
http://profootballtalk.nbcsports.com/2013/05/30/seahawks-moffitt-was- b anned-from-mall-before-urination-arrest/


"Once outside, two pairs of handcuffs were placed on Moffitt due to his large size and a recent shoulder injury," the police report states. "Both sets of handcuffs were checked for tightness, and all were double locked."

It must be a slow time of year, or something. Regardless, I sure am happy to hear that the Seattle P.D. has solved all the other crimes, and cleared out any open cases/backlogs, that they suddenly have the time and resources to bug a 6 foot 4 inch football player pissing in a parking lot outside a bar.
 
2013-05-30 04:43:19 PM  
Lolz.  Looks like we're gonna have to go from calling them the SeAdderall Seahawks to the SeAdderall Pee-Hawks.
 
2013-05-30 04:45:05 PM  

xaks: http://profootballtalk.nbcsports.com/2013/05/30/seahawks-moffitt-was- b anned-from-mall-before-urination-arrest/


"Once outside, two pairs of handcuffs were placed on Moffitt due to his large size and a recent shoulder injury," the police report states. "Both sets of handcuffs were checked for tightness, and all were double locked."

It must be a slow time of year, or something. Regardless, I sure am happy to hear that the Seattle P.D. has solved all the other crimes, and cleared out any open cases/backlogs, that they suddenly have the time and resources to bug a 6 foot 4 inch football player pissing in a parking lot outside a bar.


He is lucky he isnt being forced to register as a sex offender
 
2013-05-30 05:24:25 PM  
And this comes just as he is releasing his line of bacon-themed apparel. I bet they timed this just to screw with it.

Not even kidding
 
2013-05-30 06:08:48 PM  

xaks: It must be a slow time of year, or something. Regardless, I sure am happy to hear that the Seattle P.D. has solved all the other crimes, and cleared out any open cases/backlogs, that they suddenly have the time and resources to bug a 6 foot 4 inch football player pissing in a parking lot outside a bar.


It wasn't Seattle PD.

And if you RTFA, you'd gather the po-po knew who they were looking for.
 
2013-05-30 06:10:41 PM  

seumasokelly: And this comes just as he is releasing his line of bacon-themed apparel. I bet they timed this just to screw with it.

Not even kidding


Why is everything that happens to the Seahawks a farking conspiracy to you?
 
2013-05-30 06:18:42 PM  

LessO2: seumasokelly: And this comes just as he is releasing his line of bacon-themed apparel. I bet they timed this just to screw with it.

Not even kidding

Why is everything that happens to the Seahawks a farking conspiracy to you?


OK, I can't tell whose sarcasm meter is off.
 
2013-05-30 06:50:25 PM  
i3.photobucket.com

i36.photobucket.com
 
2013-05-30 10:31:17 PM  
I think it's cute that the Seahawks have haters.

You only have haters for one reason.

media.zenfs.com
 
2013-05-30 10:53:31 PM  
That image cracks me up every time
 
2013-05-31 08:14:52 AM  
Same. It isn't even sherman as much as lil tommy brieber's face. "i won't look, i won't look, i won't look. rubber and glue. i won't look"
 
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