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(Salon)   A device that Ailes had installed in every green room in the building methodically sucks the life force out of five adorable baby puppies and deposits it into O'Reilly's face, keeping him fresh and youthful-looking for one more day   (salon.com ) divider line
    More: Amusing, o'reilly, Roger Ailes, Sean Hannity, Bernie Goldberg, most massive stars, senior producer, caller ID, Bill Shine  
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2191 clicks; posted to Politics » on 30 May 2013 at 8:53 AM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-05-30 02:10:06 AM  
I  can't finish TFA.  It's like trying to follow the ramblings of a drunk.
 
2013-05-30 08:58:56 AM  
Ignore BU. The article is actually really well written. There are a few funny bits, and a TINY bit of politics, but mostly its a great look into how the organization actually works, though mostly from a Bill-O-centric viewpoint.
 
2013-05-30 09:01:58 AM  

BarkingUnicorn: I  can't finish TFA.  It's like trying to follow the ramblings of a drunk.


He starts with an analogy of the sun/planets/moon and then just starts rambling........
 
2013-05-30 09:04:42 AM  
The Fox News offices have a sacrificial alter (carved from stone hewn from Golgotha) in the basement, with a pentagram drawn on the floor in living flame that never burns out, but that's just for show, something to keep the production assistants busy. Six sub-basements below that is where the real action takes place. There, in an unnaturally cold room that opens into a small cave, rests the Shrine of the Multi-Faced One. Ever shifting, it appears as many things to different people, and some claim they can hear it singing a soft song that sounds like war. Each on-air personality must spend a week alone in this cave, given nothing but a supply of water and a sharp knife. If after a week of being that close to the shrine, they have not cut their own jugular, they are considered "Fair and Balanced".
 
2013-05-30 09:05:36 AM  
The headline is seriously deranged.  Life force sucker outers are ALWAYS either in the kitchen or the mens room.

/everybody knows that
 
2013-05-30 09:06:26 AM  

Citrate1007: BarkingUnicorn: I  can't finish TFA.  It's like trying to follow the ramblings of a drunk.

He starts with an analogy of the sun/planets/moon and then just starts rambling........


PTSD, I figure. I can't get through it.
 
2013-05-30 09:08:49 AM  
It's actually a very good, eye-opening article.  I can just see BillO screaming at his driver while dictating the script of his show over the phone.  Insane.
 
2013-05-30 09:22:50 AM  
Also, any anchors who mentioned the site on air had to use the phrase "left-wing Politico"

i.imgur.com
 
2013-05-30 09:25:32 AM  

jayhawk88: The Fox News offices have a sacrificial alter (carved from stone hewn from Golgotha) in the basement, with a pentagram drawn on the floor in living flame that never burns out, but that's just for show, something to keep the production assistants busy. Six sub-basements below that is where the real action takes place. There, in an unnaturally cold room that opens into a small cave, rests the Shrine of the Multi-Faced One. Ever shifting, it appears as many things to different people, and some claim they can hear it singing a soft song that sounds like war. Each on-air personality must spend a week alone in this cave, given nothing but a supply of water and a sharp knife. If after a week of being that close to the shrine, they have not cut their own jugular, they are considered "Fair and Balanced".


I want to believe that the explanation for foxnews is a concentration of the old ones' evil more than facing the reality that people are really that stupid.

/foxnews r'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn
 
2013-05-30 09:27:08 AM  
We called it the Newsfax because it was easier to tell Bill we were faxing it to him than it was to explain that we were remotely printing it to his home printer.
That's his audience, too.
 
2013-05-30 09:28:33 AM  
Once upon a time, there was a place of great goodness, called the FOX News building. Gentle fawns gamboled there amidst happy, laughing spirits. The sounds of innocence and joy filled the air. And when it rained, it rained sweet nectar that infused one's heart with a desire to live life in truth and beauty. Generally speaking, a ghastly place, reeking of virtue's sour smell. Engorged with the whispered prayers of kneeling mothers, mewling newborns, and fools, young and old, compelled to do good without reason ... But, I am happy to point out that our story does not end in this wretched place of saccharine excess. For there's another place, its opposite: A place of almost unimaginable power, chock full of dark forces and vicious secrets. No prayers dare enter this frightful maw. The spirits there care not for good deeds or priestly invocations, they're as likely to rip the flesh from your bone as greet you with a happy "good day." And if harnessed, these spirits in this hidden land of unmuffled screams and broken hearts would offer up a power so vast that its bearer might reorder the Earth itself to his liking.
 
2013-05-30 09:29:26 AM  
also holy shiat if you can't follow that article
 
2013-05-30 09:32:35 AM  

BarkingUnicorn: I  can't finish TFA.  It's like trying to follow the ramblings of a drunk.


Aah.. Wasn't just me then.
I was finding the subject interesting but having real bother actually taking it in.. Cancel that shot of bromine, nurse!
 
2013-05-30 09:34:40 AM  

Jackson Herring: also holy shiat if you can't follow that article


Are you saying he didn't meander? Cos he was meandering like the source of the Amazon in there.

/meander
 
2013-05-30 09:36:18 AM  
"Actually, Bill, the muffin thing got debunked," Steiner started to tell him. "A guy from the hotel came out and said -"

"I don't give a shiat what the guy said," Bill interrupted, suddenly angry.


 As long as it fits the narrative the truth is always optional in Mr Ailes' neighborhood.

...a powerful female VP who banned him from our air and demanded that all Fox-affiliated websites refer to him only as "Pig Maher."

Wondered where that came from.
 
2013-05-30 09:37:39 AM  

Mrfusticle: Jackson Herring: also holy shiat if you can't follow that article

Are you saying he didn't meander? Cos he was meandering like the source of the Amazon in there.

/meander


It was an excerpt from a book and not an actual article, maybe that was the problem.
 
2013-05-30 09:38:13 AM  
Crotchety old people are crotchety and old but they are still people, people that are too old understand today's world.
 
2013-05-30 09:43:38 AM  
It rambles a bit, and the fact that it appears to be drawn from different excerpts doesn't help, but it is an interesting read.  It's an interesting look at Bill O, that's for sure.

I mean, the guy is smart enough to set up his own show, outline every detail of his message, but can't understand how networked printers work?  Amazing.
 
2013-05-30 09:44:27 AM  
That was entertaining, and the bit about the content generated from the bottom up was both unexpected and interesting.

But what I'm really waiting for is a bunch of similar books written by insiders in the Republican Legislative and Executive branches in the 2000s. I'd half-expected to have a couple of those by now but I haven't seen any. Why not? Were they *that* careful to hire only extremely loyal partisans? Is there some sort of legal contract or other implied you'll-never-work-in-this-town-again threat that keeps everyone silent? Are they waiting for Cheney to kick the bucket? Or just waiting for the R implosion to progress a little further?
 
2013-05-30 09:49:28 AM  

Mrfusticle: Jackson Herring: also holy shiat if you can't follow that article

Are you saying he didn't meander? Cos he was meandering like the source of the Amazon in there.

/meander


Its a long read in a narrative format rather than a short news report. This is normal for investigative pieces, especially in this case since its straight out of a book.

Its the kind of piece I expect from Salon and Rolling Stone and the like. Sometimes its worth the time to read, sometimes not. This time it was, in my opinion.
 
2013-05-30 09:50:59 AM  
Baby puppies? Aren't all puppies inherently babies?

/DRTFA
 
2013-05-30 09:56:50 AM  
Every time he mentioned the "Second Floor" it was in the same tone as Winston discussed room 101.
 
2013-05-30 09:57:26 AM  

BarkingUnicorn: I  can't finish TFA.  It's like trying to follow the ramblings of a drunk.


I can't imagine how much booze & pills it would take to work with O'Reilly.
 
2013-05-30 10:00:17 AM  

ikanreed: Every time he mentioned the "Second Floor" it was in the same tone as Winston discussed room 101.


I sorta thought of it as the Senior Partners in Angel's Wolfram & Hart. That would make the Second Floor like the White Room I guess.
 
2013-05-30 10:00:47 AM  

Where wolf: It rambles a bit, and the fact that it appears to be drawn from different excerpts doesn't help, but it is an interesting read.  It's an interesting look at Bill O, that's for sure.

I mean, the guy is smart enough to set up his own show, outline every detail of his message, but can't understand how networked printers work?  Amazing.


I've worked for people like that before.  How it works is unimportant as long as it works as needed when it's supposed to.
 
2013-05-30 10:03:44 AM  
Anyone else watch the Daily Show the other night, with O'Reiily?
Seemed like some chunks were edited out. Dunno.
 
2013-05-30 10:03:53 AM  
Boy is he going to be pissed when Jen puts the shard back in the dark crystal.  O'Reilly will have to recombine with Rachel Maddow to form one being.

/When single shines the triple sun...
 
2013-05-30 10:04:45 AM  

aaronx: Citrate1007: BarkingUnicorn: I  can't finish TFA.  It's like trying to follow the ramblings of a drunk.

He starts with an analogy of the sun/planets/moon and then just starts rambling........

PTSD, I figure. I can't get through it.


o/

couldn't make it either
 
2013-05-30 10:05:23 AM  
content9.flixster.com

Trial by stone!
 
2013-05-30 10:06:24 AM  
Every once in a while, I flip over to Fox News when I'm bored.  Maybe once a month. Rarely there longer than a minute.  Last night it was O'Reilly, and he had Paul Ryan on.  It began with O'Reilly grinning, pointing at Ryan, and shouting, "EXACTLY!  EXACTLY!"  Then Ryan said something like, "This isn't even a partisan position.  This is common sense."  And something from O'Reilly like, "But liberals don't see it that way."

That was enough for me.
 
2013-05-30 10:11:24 AM  

Where wolf: I mean, the guy is smart enough to set up his own show, outline every detail of his message, but can't understand how networked printers work? Amazing.


My boss has a Masters in Electrical Engineering from Cornell.  Even when I try to explain how to use his computer more effectively, or fix simple problems on a level that my tech deficient 12 year old can understand, he just won't get it.  I think it is generational/ego or maybe just high functioning slight autism.  He is very smart in his field, but once you get out of his field or he gets into 'this is the way I do/understand something' mentality, there is little convincing him otherwise.
 
2013-05-30 10:14:48 AM  
Okay it is time to admit I have a problem,
I read this
all the lesser producers and PAs were moons as all the lesser producers and PAs were Morons
and this
In fact, Bill had procured an EP title for himself, but he outranked the two other EPs on the show, both Stan as
Satan

So do I need new glasses or psychotrophic meds?
 
2013-05-30 10:19:29 AM  

rufus-t-firefly: BarkingUnicorn: I  can't finish TFA.  It's like trying to follow the ramblings of a drunk.

I can't imagine how much booze & pills it would take to work with O'Reilly.


People like O'reilly don't have stress. They are, however, carriers of it and should be avoided at all costs.
 
2013-05-30 10:23:05 AM  

Maud Dib: Anyone else watch the Daily Show the other night, with O'Reiily?
Seemed like some chunks were edited out. Dunno.


The whole interview probably went on for at least an hour.  Given how the two of them go back and forth, it's probably pretty hard to cut that down for 7-10 minutes of a 22-minute show and make it look seamless.
 
2013-05-30 10:29:21 AM  

xxmedium: rufus-t-firefly: BarkingUnicorn: I  can't finish TFA.  It's like trying to follow the ramblings of a drunk.

I can't imagine how much booze & pills it would take to work with O'Reilly.

People like O'reilly don't have stress. They are, however, carriers of it and should be avoided at all costs.


Hey, he'll help you relax.

Well, if I took you down there then I'd want to take a shower with you right away, that would be the first thing I'd do... yeah, we'd check into the room, and we would order up some room service and uh and you'd definitely get two wines into you as quickly as I could get into you I would get 'em into you... maybe intravenously, get those glasses of wine into you...

You would basically be in the shower and then I would come in and I'd join you and you would have your back to me and I would take that little loofa thing and kinda soap up your back... rub it all over you, get you to relax, hot water... and um... you know, you'd feel the tension drain out of you and uh you still would be with your back to me then I would kinda put my arm -- it's one of those mitts, those loofa mitts you know, so I got my hands in it... and I would put it around front, kinda rub your tummy a little bit with it, and then with my other hand I would start to massage your boobs, get your nipples really hard... 'cuz I like that and you have really spectacular boobs...

So anyway I'd be rubbing your big boobs and getting your nipples really hard, kinda kissing your neck from behind...and then I would take the other hand with the falafel thing and I'd put it on your pussy but you'd have to do it really light, just kind of a tease business....


I'm not a woman, but I imagine there's nothing sexier to a woman than somebody rubbing a loofah on her lady parts.


And what grown-ass man uses the word "boobs" when trying to arouse a woman?
 
2013-05-30 10:32:03 AM  

wxboy: Maud Dib: Anyone else watch the Daily Show the other night, with O'Reiily?
Seemed like some chunks were edited out. Dunno.

The whole interview probably went on for at least an hour.  Given how the two of them go back and forth, it's probably pretty hard to cut that down for 7-10 minutes of a 22-minute show and make it look seamless.


They have a longer, unedited version on the web site.
 
2013-05-30 10:32:14 AM  
I only read the article to see if there was a designated time of day for Bill to dildo himself while sexually harassing staffers.

I was sadly disappointed.
 
2013-05-30 10:32:22 AM  
Excerpt reinforces impression that O'Reilly is egotistical temperamental unpleasant and difficult. Of particular interest is his devotion/sensitivity to Nielsen ratings and their influence on his story decisions. Bottom up management style described would result in bosses whose function was to say no to ideas rather than lead, which is oddly similar to the Republicans behavior in congress.
 
2013-05-30 10:43:44 AM  
It was a unique, bottom-up management structure that had built-in checks and balances coming from the top down.

It's not that unique.  A lot of terrorist organizations use that management structure.
 
2013-05-30 10:44:03 AM  

Car_Ramrod: Baby puppies? Aren't all puppies inherently babies?

/DRTFA


Baby puppies are the small fragile newborn puppies say from just born to about 8 weeks
encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com

Well a puppy is still a puppy up until one to two years depending on the breed.

encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com


In human terms haven't you ever heard a four year old say "that's for babies" or a five to six year old talking about little kids.


/any excuse to post puppy pics
//and a kitten pic to boot.
///threes
 
2013-05-30 10:45:24 AM  

rufus-t-firefly: Hey, he'll help you relax.

 
Typed Bill O'Reilly dirty talk is the language equivalent of the Winston Churchill in drag visual.


I do want a shower now, though. So thanks for that.

rufus-t-firefly: And what grown-ass man uses the word "boobs" when trying to arouse a woman?


The kind whose idea of passion culminates in a lights-out, four minute, missionary only session while still wearing black dress socks and sock garters?
 
2013-05-30 10:46:05 AM  

IrateShadow: Where wolf: It rambles a bit, and the fact that it appears to be drawn from different excerpts doesn't help, but it is an interesting read.  It's an interesting look at Bill O, that's for sure.

I mean, the guy is smart enough to set up his own show, outline every detail of his message, but can't understand how networked printers work?  Amazing.

I've worked for people like that before.  How it works is unimportant as long as it works as needed when it's supposed to.


My mom and dad often referred to the 'fridge as the icebox, even though they only had iceboxes as kids. I don't think it's that big a deal. I still hear people talking about dialing and phones, even though most phones switched to buttons thirty years ago. I think the author is looking to make a bigger deal out of this than it really is (the sucking the life force out of babies and puppies should be a hint that he is not averse to using hyperbole for humor.)
 
2013-05-30 11:00:35 AM  

spongeboob: Car_Ramrod: Baby puppies? Aren't all puppies inherently babies?

/DRTFA

Baby puppies are the small fragile newborn puppies say from just born to about 8 weeks
[encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com image 269x188]

Well a puppy is still a puppy up until one to two years depending on the breed.

[encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com image 200x250]


In human terms haven't you ever heard a four year old say "that's for babies" or a five to six year old talking about little kids.


/any excuse to post puppy pics
//and a kitten pic to boot.
///threes


Yea, but kids are stupid.
 
2013-05-30 11:02:51 AM  

wxboy: The whole interview probably went on for at least an hour. Given how the two of them go back and forth, it's probably pretty hard to cut that down for 7-10 minutes of a 22-minute show and make it look seamless.


Yeah,you have to remember that Stewart and O'Reilly love each other. They feed each other rage viewers, make entire segments mocking each other, and there aren't many people in the industry smart enough to keep up with them when they really get going, so they play off each other really well.

/I don't like O'Reilly at all, but he is frustratingly smart.
 
2013-05-30 11:17:50 AM  

Car_Ramrod: Yea, but kids are stupid


Tell me about have you ever tried to discuss politics with a six year old.  And don't even get me started on having a five year old help you move.
 
2013-05-30 11:18:31 AM  

steverockson: Mrfusticle: Jackson Herring: also holy shiat if you can't follow that article

Are you saying he didn't meander? Cos he was meandering like the source of the Amazon in there.

/meander

It was an excerpt from a book and not an actual article, maybe that was the problem.


It is? I didn't see a book title mention - I want the whole book if this is the writing style.

And it confuses me that people couldn't follow that.
 
2013-05-30 11:28:39 AM  
FTA:  "O'Reilly hates Sean [Hannity] and he hates Rush [Limbaugh] because they did better in radio than he did,"

one of the reasons could be that their core audiences can't work a cable box
 
2013-05-30 11:32:47 AM  

spongeboob: Okay it is time to admit I have a problem,
I read this
all the lesser producers and PAs were moons  as all the lesser producers and PAs were Morons
and this
In fact, Bill had procured an EP title for himself, but he outranked the two other EPs on the show, both Stan as
Satan

So do I need new glasses or psychotrophic meds?


This occasionally happens to me too.
I wonder if there is a term for this phenomenon.

Visual mondegreen?
Eggcorn?
Ironic malapropism?

None of those seems to fit exactly.  Eggcorn is probably best, but mostly because the term is concise.
 
2013-05-30 11:49:04 AM  

Lackofname: steverockson: Mrfusticle: Jackson Herring: also holy shiat if you can't follow that article

Are you saying he didn't meander? Cos he was meandering like the source of the Amazon in there.

/meander

It was an excerpt from a book and not an actual article, maybe that was the problem.

It is? I didn't see a book title mention - I want the whole book if this is the writing style.

And it confuses me that people couldn't follow that.


Yep

Excerpted from http://www.amazon.com/dp/0525953957/?tag=saloncom08-20">"An Atheist in the FOXhole: A Liberal's Eight-Year Odyssey Inside the Heart of the Right-Wing Media"
 
2013-05-30 11:55:32 AM  
For someone as pugilistic as he, he's shockingly unable to roll with the punches.

That's not actually shocking at all.
 
2013-05-30 12:15:46 PM  

xxmedium: rufus-t-firefly: Hey, he'll help you relax.
 
Typed Bill O'Reilly dirty talk is the language equivalent of the Winston Churchill in drag visual.


I do want a shower now, though. So thanks for that.

rufus-t-firefly: And what grown-ass man uses the word "boobs" when trying to arouse a woman?

The kind whose idea of passion culminates in a lights-out, four minute, missionary only session while still wearing black dress socks and sock garters?


Clearly you've never read "Those Who Trespass", which is one of the most disturbing fantasy novels I've ever read.

Let me make this clear:  I'm not talking about swords and sorcery, I'm talking about Bill O'Reilly's ultimate fantasy world put on paper.

A serial killer (O'Reilly) starts killing political figures, both media and legislative.  And it's in extremely disturbing and specific ways, and these figures include composites of both Hillary Clinton and Michael Moore.  He's pursued by a detective (also O'Reilly) and both of them bang the heroine, a big-busted blonde (which could be any woman on Fox, but I'm thinking Megyn Kelly or Gretchen Carlson).

Best line?  "Put down that pole and get this pole up."

Especially when delivered by O'Reilly himself on his audiobook.
 
2013-05-30 12:33:19 PM  

phaseolus: That was entertaining, and the bit about the content generated from the bottom up was both unexpected and interesting.

But what I'm really waiting for is a bunch of similar books written by insiders in the Republican Legislative and Executive branches in the 2000s. I'd half-expected to have a couple of those by now but I haven't seen any. Why not? Were they *that* careful to hire only extremely loyal partisans? Is there some sort of legal contract or other implied you'll-never-work-in-this-town-again threat that keeps everyone silent? Are they waiting for Cheney to kick the bucket? Or just waiting for the R implosion to progress a little further?


I'm still waiting for the book of someone inside the Romney presidential campaign.
 
2013-05-30 12:50:42 PM  

spongeboob: Car_Ramrod: Yea, but kids are stupid

Tell me about have you ever tried to discuss politics with a six year old.  And don't even get me started on having a five year old help you move.


They can't even hold their liquor!
 
2013-05-30 01:00:37 PM  

The Lone Gunman: xxmedium: rufus-t-firefly: Hey, he'll help you relax.

Typed Bill O'Reilly dirty talk is the language equivalent of the Winston Churchill in drag visual.


I do want a shower now, though. So thanks for that.

rufus-t-firefly: And what grown-ass man uses the word "boobs" when trying to arouse a woman?

The kind whose idea of passion culminates in a lights-out, four minute, missionary only session while still wearing black dress socks and sock garters?

Clearly you've never read "Those Who Trespass", which is one of the most disturbing fantasy novels I've ever read.

Let me make this clear:  I'm not talking about swords and sorcery, I'm talking about Bill O'Reilly's ultimate fantasy world put on paper.

A serial killer (O'Reilly) starts killing political figures, both media and legislative.  And it's in extremely disturbing and specific ways, and these figures include composites of both Hillary Clinton and Michael Moore.  He's pursued by a detective (also O'Reilly) and both of them bang the heroine, a big-busted blonde (which could be any woman on Fox, but I'm thinking Megyn Kelly or Gretchen Carlson).

Best line?  "Put down that pole and get this pole up."

Especially when delivered by O'Reilly himself on his audiobook.


And he's so convincing.

http://blogs.villagevoice.com/runninscared/2009/03/off_with_those.ph p

"Say baby, put down that pipe and get my pipe up."

"I would like you to unhook your bra and let it slide down your arms. You can keep your shirt on."

"Cup your hands under your breasts and hold them for ten seconds."

"Off with those pants."
 
2013-05-30 01:18:54 PM  

92myrtle: That's actually somewhat of a sympathetic article to O'Reilly.  Yeah, he's insane...but the writer frames that in "method to the madness" terms about how he takes his OCD, unawareness, and volcanic temper and focuses it into a means of...stunning success that's probably the only specific means of achieving stunning success that a guy that addled-with-his-own-head can muster.  Yeah, the anecdotes are snicker-worthy, but there's something to be said for applying every ounce of it.  Even the ratings obsession; that is, after all, the bottom line in this business.  He may be a P.I.T.A. boss...not even the type who rides you hard because he cares, just a pain...but given how the staff sticks by him he seems to be the kind of boss where you'll put up with anything because the results speak for themselves.  And maybe, partly, because he seems to hate the 2nd floor as much as anyone and is one of the few in the building brazen enough to not put up with that shiat.


"2nd floor" (Ailes) seems entirely consistent with the creepy picture painted by other ex-employees.  Yeah...there's a method to that madness too, but the 1984-ishness seems a lot more lifeforce-sucking overall than the voices in O'Reilly's head.


The theme seems to be that as bad as O'Reilly is, others in the building (Ailes and Hannity, for instance) are worse. But the picture he paints of Bill-O is still pretty damaging.

The NewsFax story, for instance, is a merely cited as a benign example of the type of mindset that led O'Reilly to repeat the sixteen-dollar muffin story for weeks after it was definitively debunked. That story alone is reason enough not to take Fox News's "journalism" seriously.

Also cited was O'Reilly's cynical obsession with ratings, to the point where ratings become the sole measure of a story's importance. Because he is conceited enough to believe that he is still a real journalist, ratings and newsworthiness have become equated to the extent that he probably sincerely believes that what's good for Bill O'Reilly is good for the country. I'm reminded of Burt Lancaster in Sweet Smell of Success, particularly the scene in which Hunsecker, after Steve Dallas condemns his politics during the broadcasting his radio show, Hunsecker claims that when Dallas insulted him he was insulting millions of patriotic Americans.
 
2013-05-30 01:21:08 PM  

Cornelius Dribble: Also cited was O'Reilly's cynical obsession with ratings, to the point where ratings become the sole measure of a story's importance. Because he is conceited enough to believe that he is still a real journalist, ratings and newsworthiness have become equated to the extent that he probably sincerely believes that what's good for Bill O'Reilly is good for the country. I'm reminded of Burt Lancaster in Sweet Smell of Success, particularly the scene in which Hunsecker, after Steve Dallas condemns his politics during the broadcasting his radio show, Hunsecker claims that when Dallas insulted him he was insulting millions of patriotic Americans.


Memo to self: no matter how of a hurry I'm in, Preview is my friend.
 
2013-05-30 01:45:50 PM  

Cornelius Dribble: Also cited was O'Reilly's cynical obsession with ratings, to the point where ratings become the sole measure of a story's importance. Because he is conceited enough to believe that he is still a real journalist, ratings and newsworthiness have become equated to the extent that he probably sincerely believ ...


He also factors in emails on what topics generate the most interest.
 
2013-05-30 03:14:51 PM  

Emposter: Ignore BU. The article is actually really well written. There are a few funny bits, and a TINY bit of politics, but mostly its a great look into how the organization actually works, though mostly from a Bill-O-centric viewpoint.


It's both the funniest and the most fascinating thing I've read in a long time. I think BU is just doing damage control and trying to play it down.

Either that, or he's so used to reading Right wing media that well-written pieces more than 3 sentences long challenge him.
 
2013-05-30 03:16:42 PM  
 "We're doing a gay marriage segment - get me a black lesbian civil rights attorney!"

"I want to do a segment on the Super Bowl next week - find me a funny white sports expert under forty! But he can't be bald."


Who says Righties can't be funny? That right there is Comedy Gold™.
 
2013-05-30 03:30:37 PM  

Mrfusticle: Jackson Herring: also holy shiat if you can't follow that article

Are you saying he didn't meander? Cos he was meandering like the source of the Amazon in there.

/meander


In other words, not at all? Rivers meander, but their sources are pretty consistent.

And once again, it's not that hard to follow for anyone not rolling on a gram of meth. Jesus, MTv has rotted brains even after they stopped being relevant, this Short Attention Span Theatre bullshiat has got to stop. I had to read more challenging shiat in 4th grade, for God's sake.

And, BTW: They identified the source of the Amazon something like 15 years or so ago.
 
2013-05-30 03:51:41 PM  

jayhawk88: The Fox News offices have a sacrificial alter (carved from stone hewn from Golgotha) in the basement, with a pentagram drawn on the floor in living flame that never burns out, but that's just for show, something to keep the production assistants busy. Six sub-basements below that is where the real action takes place. There, in an unnaturally cold room that opens into a small cave, rests the Shrine of the Multi-Faced One. Ever shifting, it appears as many things to different people, and some claim they can hear it singing a soft song that sounds like war. Each on-air personality must spend a week alone in this cave, given nothing but a supply of water and a sharp knife. If after a week of being that close to the shrine, they have not cut their own jugular, they are considered "Fair and Balanced".


This post made me shiver IRL.
 
2013-05-30 03:56:05 PM  

The Lone Gunman: xxmedium: rufus-t-firefly: Hey, he'll help you relax.
 
Typed Bill O'Reilly dirty talk is the language equivalent of the Winston Churchill in drag visual.


I do want a shower now, though. So thanks for that.

rufus-t-firefly: And what grown-ass man uses the word "boobs" when trying to arouse a woman?

The kind whose idea of passion culminates in a lights-out, four minute, missionary only session while still wearing black dress socks and sock garters?

Clearly you've never read "Those Who Trespass", which is one of the most disturbing fantasy novels I've ever read.

Let me make this clear:  I'm not talking about swords and sorcery, I'm talking about Bill O'Reilly's ultimate fantasy world put on paper.

A serial killer (O'Reilly) starts killing political figures, both media and legislative.  And it's in extremely disturbing and specific ways, and these figures include composites of both Hillary Clinton and Michael Moore.  He's pursued by a detective (also O'Reilly) and both of them bang the heroine, a big-busted blonde (which could be any woman on Fox, but I'm thinking Megyn Kelly or Gretchen Carlson).

Best line?  "Put down that pole and get this pole up."

Especially when delivered by O'Reilly himself on his audiobook.


A co-worker and I bought 'Those Who Tresspass' used on Amazon for 10 cents. We'd take breaks during the day, open to a random page and read. It was never not hysterical.

I thought the article was entertaining as hell, but not a real surprise. O'Reilly has always been more about his ratings than any ideology. He knows what his listeners want and he obviously delivers in spades, if not loofahs. I almost admire it, but he just seems like such an insufferable prick much of the time.

I loved the visual of him on the phone with Ailes, having to calmly lose his argument, hanging up and then just raging and taking it out on his staff.
 
2013-05-30 08:31:34 PM  
For all the idiots with the reading comprehension and attention span of a 4 year old, here are some edited highlights:

There was never any centralized control like that. No "marching orders," as it were. Instead, it was more a decentralized, entrepreneurial approach. Each showrunner - who had not risen to their position by being stupid - knew exactly what was expected of them, knew what topics and guests would be acceptable.

...

Comedian Bill Maher, once a semi-regular guest on "The Factor" and some other Fox shows, made too many cracks about Sarah Palin over the years, raising the ire of a powerful female VP who banned him from our air and demanded that all Fox-affiliated websites refer to him only as "Pig Maher."

Sometimes entire organizations were given lifetime bans. The website Politico wrote something a few years back that rubbed Roger the wrong way (we were never told what exactly the transgression was) and word went out to all the shows: No more Politico reporters as guests. Also, any anchors who mentioned the site on air had to use the phrase "left-wing Politico"


...

"O'Reilly hates Sean [Hannity] and he hates Rush [Limbaugh] because they did better in radio than he did," Ailes said. Bill was furious for weeks. Because it turns out there is one thing he hated even more than management meddling: someone insulting his ratings.

...

We called it the Newsfax because it was easier to tell Bill we were faxing it to him than it was to explain that we were remotely printing it to his home printer. It's often simpler to let him believe something erroneously than it is to correct him.

...

Bill took the e-mails - sent by our audience to O­Re­i­lly[nospam-﹫-backwards]s­we­n­xof­*co­m - pretty seriously.  Each morning, two unlucky women on the staff had the unenviable job of sorting through the e-mails and printing out a representative sample of fifty to sixty. He selects a handful to be read on the air.  I'd glanced at the show's in-box from time to time and had been blown away by the sheer incoherence and illiteracy of some of the respondents. This would sometimes present a problem, for Bill liked his e-mails to be short, pithy, and not written by a complete moron.

On one occasion, there was an e-mail that Bill really wanted to read on the air. One of the producers noticed that the e-mail was signed with an obvious gag name: Jack MeHoff. After pondering for a bit, he decided on a course of action: "Let's just change the last name to Mehoffer." Despite producers pleading with him that the slight name change was not much, if at all, better than the original, Bill stuck to his guns, reading the letter with the modified name on air. The rest is YouTube history.


...

"We're doing a gay marriage segment - get me a black lesbian civil rights attorney!" or "I want to do a segment on the Super Bowl next week - find me a funny white sports expert under forty! But he can't be bald."
 
2013-05-31 12:11:00 AM  
[adds Bloody William's and jayhawk88's posts to collection of Farkpocalypse fan fic]
 
2013-05-31 03:26:28 AM  

rufus-t-firefly: The Lone Gunman: xxmedium: rufus-t-firefly: Hey, he'll help you relax.

Typed Bill O'Reilly dirty talk is the language equivalent of the Winston Churchill in drag visual.


I do want a shower now, though. So thanks for that.

rufus-t-firefly: And what grown-ass man uses the word "boobs" when trying to arouse a woman?

The kind whose idea of passion culminates in a lights-out, four minute, missionary only session while still wearing black dress socks and sock garters?

Clearly you've never read "Those Who Trespass", which is one of the most disturbing fantasy novels I've ever read.

Let me make this clear:  I'm not talking about swords and sorcery, I'm talking about Bill O'Reilly's ultimate fantasy world put on paper.

A serial killer (O'Reilly) starts killing political figures, both media and legislative.  And it's in extremely disturbing and specific ways, and these figures include composites of both Hillary Clinton and Michael Moore.  He's pursued by a detective (also O'Reilly) and both of them bang the heroine, a big-busted blonde (which could be any woman on Fox, but I'm thinking Megyn Kelly or Gretchen Carlson).

Best line?  "Put down that pole and get this pole up."

Especially when delivered by O'Reilly himself on his audiobook.

And he's so convincing.

http://blogs.villagevoice.com/runninscared/2009/03/off_with_those.ph p

"Say baby, put down that pipe and get my pipe up."

"I would like you to unhook your bra and let it slide down your arms. You can keep your shirt on."

"Cup your hands under your breasts and hold them for ten seconds."

"Off with those pants."


*gags*
 
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