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(Huffington Post)   Link: "This Is The Most Inspiring Woman You'll Meet All Week." Article: Hottie* takes off seatbelt to dick around in back seat, mess with cell phone. Falls off cliff, lives. * If you find being dumber than a bag of bricks attractive   (huffingtonpost.com) divider line 53
    More: Dumbass, car accidents, Idaho, missed call, seat belts, Sun Valley  
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15978 clicks; posted to Main » on 29 May 2013 at 8:21 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-05-29 08:23:59 AM
I'd crash it.
 
2013-05-29 08:24:46 AM
Recovery?  She hurt her foot... has two cuts on her arms which are stitched together... and she finds it hard to move her eyelid.

jesus christ what a lucky whiner.
 
2013-05-29 08:25:21 AM

sulco: I'd crash it.


I'd fumble around in its backseat
 
2013-05-29 08:26:15 AM
Oddly, in this case I DO seem to find that attractive.

would hit, scars and all.
 
2013-05-29 08:30:00 AM
She had unbuckled her seatbelt and reached into the backseat to grab something. Shortly after, she tried to return a missed call. She put down her phone because she didn't have any service, and when she looked up, she realized that she was about to go off the right side of the road.

lh4.ggpht.com
 
2013-05-29 08:30:41 AM
So what's so inspiring about f*cking around on your phone while driving and almost killing yourself? Would she be inspiring if she slammed into another car instead of almost Darwining just herself? What a f*cking moron. I'd still hit that, though.
 
2013-05-29 08:32:27 AM
Nothing at all inspiring here.  All I see is a ton of stupidity and a lot of luck.  She's lucky all she got out of that is a couple of cuts on her arm and eyelid and a messed-up ankle.  The only thing this should inspire is LEAVING THE DAMN PHONE ALONE WHILE DRIVING!
 
d23 [TotalFark]
2013-05-29 08:33:04 AM
Come to my bedroom, but please do not talk.  I already he enough stupid shiat during the day that my brain feels like it is going to ooze out my ear.

Singer?  Singer definition #11 which means frustrated model?  Like Samantha Fox definition of singer?
 
2013-05-29 08:37:20 AM
I love the "inspirational" spin the writer put on this. No, this is not inspirational. She should be doing a PSA about how not to be a sh*tty driver.

/"Aaaahh, I'm hang-gliding! Take a good picture honey, I'm dead!"
 
2013-05-29 08:39:35 AM

d23: Come to my bedroom, but please do not talk.  I already he enough stupid shiat during the day that my brain feels like it is going to ooze out my ear.

Singer?  Singer definition #11 which means frustrated model?  Like Samantha Fox definition of singer?


Or Lana del Rey.
 
2013-05-29 08:40:08 AM
She prayed to God.  Obviously God saved her.  All those children dying of cancer?  Obviously doing it wrong.
 
2013-05-29 08:40:45 AM

ShaggyMarrs: I love the "inspirational" spin the writer put on this. No, this is not inspirational. She should be doing a PSA about how not to be a sh*tty driver.

/"Aaaahh, I'm hang-gliding! Take a good picture honey, I'm dead!"


What an IDIOT!
 
d23 [TotalFark]
2013-05-29 08:43:32 AM

EyeballKid: d23: Come to my bedroom, but please do not talk.  I already he enough stupid shiat during the day that my brain feels like it is going to ooze out my ear.

Singer?  Singer definition #11 which means frustrated model?  Like Samantha Fox definition of singer?

Or Lana del Rey.


No doubt.  "Young and Beautiful."  No ego there.
 
2013-05-29 08:43:40 AM
Having a footnote in the headline doesn't really work.
 
2013-05-29 08:51:36 AM

d23: Come to my bedroom, but please do not talk.  I already he enough stupid shiat during the day that my brain feels like it is going to ooze out my ear.

Singer?  Singer definition #11 which means frustrated model?  Like Samantha Fox definition of singer?


frustrated model or not...

horsegoeswest.com
 
2013-05-29 08:51:56 AM
She had unbuckled her seatbelt and reached into the backseat to grab something. -- Darwin up to the plate

I lost control and ended up going off the left side of the road. All of a sudden I was in the air. I realized it was a cliff, and I knew my seatbelt was too far away -- Here comes the pitch

i182.photobucket.com

When she hit the ground, still in her car, she was convinced that she was dead...But when she opened her eyes, she found herself propped up on her car's trunk -- she believes she was ejected through the back windshield--- and a swing and a miss.
 
2013-05-29 08:53:38 AM
I am cute and have a cooch: your argument that I'm stupid is invalid.
 
d23 [TotalFark]
2013-05-29 09:02:51 AM

HindiDiscoMonster: d23: Come to my bedroom, but please do not talk.  I already he enough stupid shiat during the day that my brain feels like it is going to ooze out my ear.

Singer?  Singer definition #11 which means frustrated model?  Like Samantha Fox definition of singer?

frustrated model or not...

[horsegoeswest.com image 498x306]


Sam plays for the other team, I'm afraid.
 
2013-05-29 09:05:17 AM
dennysgod:

a swing and a miss.

He's got two more swings. It's hard to cure stupid, so if this hasn't taught her anything there's good chance he can get a homer before she breeds.
 
2013-05-29 09:09:34 AM
livinglife2inspire.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-05-29 09:15:25 AM
I'd be more of a belieber if she wuz dead
 
2013-05-29 09:23:01 AM
This has inspired me to not do stupidly dangerous things while driving. Seriously, this is not a tale about someone amazing who fights undeserved adversity. This is a tale about a person who did everything possible to earn a Darwin Award and avoided death due to pure luck. Her commentary shows that she has learned nothing from the experience, aside from how to spout mindless "inspirational" crap so saccharine that it causes cancer in lab rats.
 
2013-05-29 09:26:12 AM
Miracle? My ass.
 
2013-05-29 09:32:26 AM
Today, I watched someone cross a busy street without endangering herself *or* others. More inspiring than this dumb wench.

Also still a better love story than Twilight.
 
2013-05-29 09:32:39 AM
Meh. I've had worst just driving into work.
 
2013-05-29 09:54:56 AM

BolshyGreatYarblocks: I am cute and have a cooch: your argument that I'm stupid is invalid.


Needs proof
 
2013-05-29 09:58:54 AM
I'd a ho

/she said
 
2013-05-29 10:03:21 AM
If this had happened to a middle-aged overweight black woman I doubt the story would have been written the same way, if you would have even heard of it at all.
 
2013-05-29 10:15:05 AM
Natural redhead, pretty, young.

She could manage to crap on her own shoes without dying and some idiot would call it "inspiring".
 
2013-05-29 10:16:16 AM
maybe put the car in park, and set the brake?

just saying
 
2013-05-29 10:18:03 AM
so red is the new blond?

i think she went red to get away from the blond jokes
and this is not helping her case
 
2013-05-29 10:27:59 AM
The only inspiration she provides is as an example to not do stupid things while driving like taking your seatbelt off, reach into the backseat, or try to make a phone call. Other than that, no.

/she is a hottie though
//incredibly stupid also
///and lucky
 
2013-05-29 10:40:07 AM

Zombalupagus: If this had happened to a middle-aged overweight black woman I doubt the story would have been written the same way, if you would have even heard of it at all.


"Foolish Woman Learns the Dangers of Cell Phones and Driving, Thanks God for Recovery"

On May 12, Charity Jackson, mother of two and all around fool, was returning from an evening spent with her elderly ailing mother. After stopping her vehicle for a moment to enjoy the ephemeral beauty of rural Idaho, she foolishly resumed driving home, even knowing a call from her brother was imminent. All that is known for certain is that on a hairpin turn, Mrs. Jackson, probably fumbling for her phone like an idiot, plummeted down a ravine, and only survived thanks to her fervent prayers and deep faith. Having learned her lesson, she thanks God every day for miraculous recovery. Said Mrs. Jackson, "I actually don't believe in any Higher Powers, and it was a bee, not a phone. I just couldn't imagine if I'd left my poor babies alone. I never meant to make my daughters cry."
 
2013-05-29 10:40:35 AM
I've got an IQ in the triple digits and did plenty of dumb stuff when I was her age. Some dumb stuff you do doesn't happen to be life threatening, so you get the experience without the risk. Her learning experience occurred in the context of a car and a cliff. She might not be as stupid as everyone here assumes, just bad at choosing when and where to make her early-life errors.
 
2013-05-29 11:14:40 AM
If her stupid cell plan provided decent coverage this would have turned out different, for sure.
 
2013-05-29 11:17:22 AM
3 words:

RED. HEAD. THREAD.


/stitches iz threads?
//fap
 
2013-05-29 11:19:37 AM
She sounds like a twat donkey to me.
 
2013-05-29 11:19:38 AM
Oh I do, subby.  I surely do.
 
2013-05-29 11:22:47 AM
bride of frankenstein
 
2013-05-29 11:30:08 AM
Could the headline possibly be any more clumsy?
 
2013-05-29 11:33:41 AM
she seems to spend a lot of time name dropping of other celebs.......and dropping off roads. Also, a not-all-that-surprising-lack of original material or even something done in a studio (youtube from your bedroom does not count)

Maybe she needs to hire Bruce Dickinson.......yes THE Bruce Dickinson, because she has what appears to be a dynamite sound.
 
2013-05-29 11:45:50 AM

dennysgod: She had unbuckled her seatbelt and reached into the backseat to grab something. -- Darwin up to the plate

I lost control and ended up going off the left side of the road. All of a sudden I was in the air. I realized it was a cliff, and I knew my seatbelt was too far away -- Here comes the pitch

[i182.photobucket.com image 445x355]

When she hit the ground, still in her car, she was convinced that she was dead...But when she opened her eyes, she found herself propped up on her car's trunk -- she believes she was ejected through the back windshield--- and a swing and a miss.


Oh, my God.  That was priceless.
+1
 
2013-05-29 12:01:31 PM
As someone who was recently almost killed by some idiot dicking around on her phone, I'm not getting a kick out of this...

Completely uninjured, but I consider any crash where one vehicle ends up upside down to be 'almost killed'.

Any person who causes a crash by way of the cellphone should have it superglued to their forehead.
After it eventually flakes off, it will be reapplied via a blowtorch.
 
2013-05-29 12:01:31 PM
People need to learn how to control panic so they won't overreact. Yes I would hit her scars and all.
 
2013-05-29 12:03:06 PM

jjorsett: I've got an IQ in the triple digits and did plenty of dumb stuff when I was her age. Some dumb stuff you do doesn't happen to be life threatening, so you get the experience without the risk. Her learning experience occurred in the context of a car and a cliff. She might not be as stupid as everyone here assumes, just bad at choosing when and where to make her early-life errors.


Now that is an assumption that all those involved were never taught anything and had to learn by trial and error.  However, many examples have been given through out the last 20+ years of why what she did is stupid.  To suggest she isn't dumb would mean she would've been the first person to ever try what she did, not expecting bad results.  In real life, where the rest of us are, we have been told to never to do something like this by many people and would be stupid to ignore the advice.

/rechtsafahren
 
2013-05-29 12:20:33 PM
I thought all contemporary inspirational stories about women involved kickboxing.
 
2013-05-29 02:17:05 PM
Stripper name
 
2013-05-29 03:03:09 PM

EyeballKid: d23: Come to my bedroom, but please do not talk.  I already he enough stupid shiat during the day that my brain feels like it is going to ooze out my ear.

Singer?  Singer definition #11 which means frustrated model?  Like Samantha Fox definition of singer?

Or Lana del Rey.


No joke, Lana del Rey is mentioned in the article.
 
2013-05-29 03:05:52 PM

Silly_Sot: Natural redhead, pretty, young.

She could manage to crap on her own shoes without dying and some idiot would call it "inspiring".


Hair that's colored #FF3333 is probably not natural.
 
2013-05-29 03:30:41 PM

boyvoyeur: BolshyGreatYarblocks: I am cute and have a cooch: your argument that I'm stupid is invalid.

Needs proof


Needed quotation marks.
 
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