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(PoPville)   It's springtime in DC, which means you'll find snakes in: a.) the grass, b.) Congress, c.) THE TREES OHMYGOD THEY'RE FALLING FROM THE TREES   (popville.com ) divider line
    More: Scary, Doyle Reservation, snakes, National Zoo  
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5774 clicks; posted to Main » on 29 May 2013 at 7:07 AM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



40 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2013-05-29 07:11:10 AM  
could be worse

extras.mnginteractive.com
 
2013-05-29 07:12:05 AM  
That's racist!
 
2013-05-29 07:13:01 AM  
A snakes in a trees are far less dangerous than ones in Congress. (Unless Congresscritters are ambushing people from trees now. [I don't see why they would ... it's not election time.])
 
2013-05-29 07:16:12 AM  
I live in Northern VA, and came across a Black Rat Snake stretched across my driveway last week...it was about 4ft long.

I would probably shiat myself if one fell out of a tree near or on me.
 
mhd
2013-05-29 07:20:10 AM  
i.imgur.com
 
2013-05-29 07:22:34 AM  
encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com
'The Mother-farker dropped out right by the merry-go-farkin-round!
//obligatory
 
2013-05-29 07:23:35 AM  
I HAVE HAD IT WITH THESE MOTHERfarkING SNAKES IN THIS MOTHERfarkING PARK!
 
2013-05-29 07:24:54 AM  
Good lord. Relax, people. Just a harmless blacksnake.
 
2013-05-29 07:25:35 AM  

Ebenator: Good lord. Relax, people. Just a harmless blacksnake.


Hide yo wife! Hide yo kids!
 
2013-05-29 07:25:59 AM  
Out hiking this past weekend I can't imagine how we didn't come across rattlesnakes, but I'm quite OK with them staying the fark away.
 
2013-05-29 07:26:58 AM  
I had to rescue a black rat snake yesterday afternoon. So II'm getting a kick, and so forth.
The damn fool living next door to the Ex had throw gasoline at while holding on to a lit cigarette in the other hand.

"Are you trying to burn yourself and the house down!?"

The snake had managed to climb up into a window shutter, so I put on some gloves, grabbed the snake by the neck and tossed him into a pillow case.
Poor thing was scared witless. The snake that is.

Let the snake go at a local park.

Went right up the nearest tree.

This is in Richmond, 2 house south of DC
 
2013-05-29 07:39:26 AM  
Meh, my folks get black ratsnakes in their old farmhouse routinely.  One or two will hang around all summer, eliminate their mice, and then move on.  They once found it in the doorway wedged between the screen door and the main door- no idea how it could have gotten there since all of the seals are very tight.  All they can figure is it crawled into the space from the inside while the main door was open and the screen door shut, and they closed the door without even noticing it.

They can be bitey at times, but it doesn't hurt.  Just a bunch of little pinpricks that bleed for a minute or two.  I'd take that over finding mouse droppings in my cereal any day.
 
2013-05-29 07:42:52 AM  
H - I - S - S - I - N - G
 
2013-05-29 07:45:08 AM  

Darkrover2: [encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com image 259x194]
'The Mother-farker dropped out right by the merry-go-farkin-round!
//obligatory


CSB: On Staten Island, at Willowbrook Park, there is a merry-go-round. Years ago a boa constrictor was spotted near it, having been released by someone who couldn't keep it anymore.
 
2013-05-29 07:46:10 AM  
Rat snakes are as dangerous as a piece of rope.  They make great pets.
 
2013-05-29 07:58:19 AM  

AMonkey'sUncle: Darkrover2: [encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com image 259x194]
'The Mother-farker dropped out right by the merry-go-farkin-round!
//obligatory

CSB: On Staten Island, at Willowbrook Park, there is a merry-go-round. Years ago a boa constrictor was spotted near it, having been released by someone who couldn't keep it anymore.


That's the start of a CSB.
 
2013-05-29 07:59:24 AM  

juvandy: Meh, my folks get black ratsnakes in their old farmhouse routinely.  One or two will hang around all summer, eliminate their mice, and then move on.  They once found it in the doorway wedged between the screen door and the main door- no idea how it could have gotten there since all of the seals are very tight.  All they can figure is it crawled into the space from the inside while the main door was open and the screen door shut, and they closed the door without even noticing it.

They can be bitey at times, but it doesn't hurt.  Just a bunch of little pinpricks that bleed for a minute or two.  I'd take that over finding mouse droppings in my cereal any day.


Myself, I'd learn to live with the mouse droppings. Or get a cat.
 
2013-05-29 08:02:05 AM  

BarkingUnicorn: AMonkey'sUncle: Darkrover2: [encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com image 259x194]
'The Mother-farker dropped out right by the merry-go-farkin-round!
//obligatory

CSB: On Staten Island, at Willowbrook Park, there is a merry-go-round. Years ago a boa constrictor was spotted near it, having been released by someone who couldn't keep it anymore.

That's the start of a CSB.


It was one of those children's park merry-go-rounds.  The boa got dizzy and vomited.  The end.
 
2013-05-29 08:03:33 AM  

markfara: Myself, I'd learn to live with the mouse droppings. Or get a cat.


Snakes >>>>>>>> Cats as rodent hunters

Enjoy your hantavirus and bubonic plague
 
2013-05-29 08:04:10 AM  
After reading the story....
There are no snakes propelling themselves towards the fine residents of Washington DC.
A bunch ass hat kids spotted the snake in a tree and proceeded to throw stuff at it until it fell out. At that point the snake tore ass to get away and the kids scattered like Beelzebub himself was coming to snatch them up.
 
2013-05-29 08:07:05 AM  
That'ssssss ssssssssuper.
 
2013-05-29 08:08:33 AM  
OMFG!!!  Someone got teh wildlife in a park!!
 
2013-05-29 08:12:06 AM  
Pfffft in Florida, we drop iguanas. Lightweights.
 
2013-05-29 08:13:09 AM  

corq: Pfffft in Florida, we drop iguanas. Lightweights.


Iguanas have legs. That makes all the difference.
 
2013-05-29 08:28:01 AM  
Seriously? Scary? A black rat snake?

Snakes have generally a very shy and calm nature, and rat snakes are extra shy. They are not dangerous. Rattlesnakes and coral snakes, those are dangerous, but even then you pretty much have to step on them.

Do me a favor, guys, never dive, snorkel, or hike. My brother has run across bears when hiking, I saw a barracuda just yesterday snorkeling (in about 3 feet of water in Waikiki at that). There are other animals sharing this earth with us, still. They are less likely to hurt you than the ones you pass on the street (humans and dogs).
 
2013-05-29 08:35:51 AM  

Minerva8918: I live in Northern VA, and came across a Black Rat Snake stretched across my driveway last week...it was about 4ft long.

I would probably shiat myself if one fell out of a tree near or on me.


Why?  They're harmless to humans and they eat rodents.
 
2013-05-29 08:43:37 AM  
I sort of feel sorry for folks that can't control their fear to get past the !SNAKE! part.

My old man used to pulverize any snake - when he was done you couldn't tell if it had been a snake or a beaver.
Dropping out of trees, now, that'd startle anyone but once I realized it was in fact NOT a Coral Snake in DC it's all good.  They are welcome to all the vermin they can eat.  If there's no vermin, they just keep on going.
Not going to look it up but I think they have a range of about 2k feet or so, near water too.
 
2013-05-29 08:44:38 AM  

juvandy: They can be bitey at times, but it doesn't hurt. Just a bunch of little pinpricks that bleed for a minute or two.


Must disagree somewhat.

Last week I heard screams in the back yard and ran around to find my wife and three year old in a panic over a 2 foot long gray rat snake coming out from behind the siding of the house.

Both said if it went back inside, they weren't so I barehanded it.  Little SOB bit the crap out of my thumb.

Now, it doesn't hurt as in "gee, that's my femur sticking out of my thigh" but it certainly is unpleasant unless you're into grabbing rosebushes barehanded.

/CSB
//Despite my desire to wring it's neck, I put it in a bucket and released it a couple of miles down the road.
 
2013-05-29 08:46:15 AM  
If anything DC needs more rat snakes.
 
2013-05-29 08:52:41 AM  

Carn: Minerva8918: I live in Northern VA, and came across a Black Rat Snake stretched across my driveway last week...it was about 4ft long.

I would probably shiat myself if one fell out of a tree near or on me.

Why?  They're harmless to humans and they eat rodents.


I know they are harmless, but I'm just not keen on the idea of any snake falling out of a tree (or just from above, period) near or on me. My flailing around like I was having a medical emergency would probably cause it to bite me lol. I know they aren't poisonous, but that wouldn't make me feel any better if I was in the middle of having a snake on me.
 
2013-05-29 08:57:27 AM  

Minerva8918: I know they are harmless, but I'm just not keen on the idea of any snake falling out of a tree (or just from above, period) near or on me


THIS.  Let alone a 5-foot long, 4-pound snake.
 
2013-05-29 09:31:05 AM  
Law of unintended consequences strikes again.  DC went on a "reduce the feral cat population!!!" binge a few years ago.  Now, you can see rats right out in the open on any greensward.  I suspect an increase in a prey species (rat) resulted in the increase of the predator species (rat) that filled in the niche left by the previous predator species (cat).
 
2013-05-29 10:04:22 AM  
Fark that! I don't do snakes.

/Every snake is a cobra and will kill you
 
2013-05-29 10:08:48 AM  
Eric Holder's minions
 
2013-05-29 10:43:13 AM  
Farkers, all these comments and I am the one who has to mention Flying Snakes? I am disappointed.
 
2013-05-29 10:56:19 AM  
www.appletonexotics.co.uk
is not impressed
 
2013-05-29 12:32:12 PM  
Doesn't like snakes either...

i149.photobucket.com
 
2013-05-29 02:02:35 PM  

BarkingUnicorn: Rat snakes are as dangerous as a piece of rope.  They make great pets.


FTFA: . Black rat snakes also produce a strong foul odor when scared to deter predators and people

I can confirm this from catching lots of these snakes as a kid in NoVa.  And I've noticed that the homes of people that keep these snakes always have a faint snake odor, regardless of how content the snake is.  No thank you.
 
2013-05-29 04:38:36 PM  

Archae hippy: BarkingUnicorn: Rat snakes are as dangerous as a piece of rope.  They make great pets.

FTFA: . Black rat snakes also produce a strong foul odor when scared to deter predators and people

I can confirm this from catching lots of these snakes as a kid in NoVa.  And I've noticed that the homes of people that keep these snakes always have a faint snake odor, regardless of how content the snake is.  No thank you.


Meh.  Every home smells of its pets, whatever they are.  The owners are desensitized.  Snakes squirt only when they're seized and struggling to get free.  Once they get used to being handled, it's not a problem.  It's not skunk grade musk, either; more like broccoli farts.
 
2013-05-29 05:37:27 PM  
D. All of the above (and below)
 
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