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(Daily Mail)   If you are rich you own a yacht. If you are really rich, you have your yacht chauffeured around the world on a specially built ship   (dailymail.co.uk) divider line 128
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16503 clicks; posted to Main » on 28 May 2013 at 1:36 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-05-28 10:49:26 AM
Yo, Dawg.
 
2013-05-28 10:50:31 AM
Freakin' Calculon.
 
2013-05-28 10:57:12 AM
Puh! Wait until you see my private airship floatin' above! I'm going to hover over those exclusive patio lounges just to be a dick & cast a shadow on them.
 
2013-05-28 10:58:26 AM
I am Elmer J. Fudd, miwionaire, I own a mansion and a yacht and a yacht to cawwey my yacht.
 
2013-05-28 11:05:02 AM
But does it have its own satellite, and FOUR deep fryers, one for each part of the chicken??
 
2013-05-28 11:34:55 AM
actually it is much cheaper both in terms of operating costs and wear and tear on the boat to have it shipped vs going all around the world on its own bottom

TMYK
===*
 
2013-05-28 01:18:54 PM

Jackson Herring: actually it is much cheaper both in terms of operating costs and wear and tear on the boat to have it shipped vs going all around the world on its own bottom

TMYK
===*


Yeah, but only a pansy wouldn't want to pilot their own, 40-foot boat across the Atlantic for three weeks!  Dockwise services are for the weak!  Never mind that a lot of the pictured vessels likely don't have a 4000NM range.  Believe it or not, folks, just as you wouldn't take a canoe into a commercial harbor, not all floating objects are trans-ocean worthy.

The 687-foot behemoth was built specifically for shipping yachts, sailboats, powerboats and any other private craft across oceans for owners who can't be bothered to sail themselves.

Let's try re-wording this for a little less class envy:  "The 80-foot behemoth was built specifically for shipping cars, tables, couches, and any other private goods across the country for owners who can't be bothered to move house themselves."
 
2013-05-28 01:20:00 PM
Actually if you are really rich isn't your yacht the size of that transport ship?
 
2013-05-28 01:25:20 PM
Why carry your twenty bags of groceries to the car when you can load them onto a huge 4-foot shopping cart to take if for you?
 
2013-05-28 01:27:46 PM
 
2013-05-28 01:40:33 PM
If I'm ever able to own an Exotic car I'll just put it on a trailer and sit inside while someone tows me where ever I need to go.
 
2013-05-28 01:40:55 PM

factoryconnection: Believe it or not, folks, just as you wouldn't take a canoe into a commercial harbor, not all floating objects are trans-ocean worthy.


Why wouldn't I?

Seems to me I can paddle out of the way of a ship faster than they can run me down.  And if they're going that fast, I might just want to surf my canoe on their bow wave.
 
2013-05-28 01:41:56 PM
Pretty slick piece of engineering.

A yacht seems like one of those things I'd have to be insanely rich to purchase because of the costs associated with owning and maintaining one.  I'd basically have to be at a point where I had money to burn.

I'm at more of a 16ft. Alumacraft level of assets.
 
2013-05-28 01:42:39 PM
I've been to the Newport (RI) boat show a few times... there was a company a few years back that had a sailboat with a hull designed to fit in a standard shipping container.  So yeah, like a six foot beam, tons of freeboard, and just the most hideous thing every.  I don't know if the cheaper shipping would be worth dealing with such a terrible hull and being the butt of a lot of jokes.

Not that I'd ever know or care.

/not rich
//knows how to sail
 
2013-05-28 01:43:16 PM

grokca: I am Elmer J. Fudd, miwionaire, I own a mansion and a yacht and a yacht to cawwey my yacht.


I may be a scwewy wabbit, but I'm not going to Alcatwaz!!!
 
2013-05-28 01:44:15 PM
Pussies.  I ride my Sea-Doo over to the Mediterranean every summer.
 
2013-05-28 01:45:40 PM
"$175,000.  Sandblasting and repainting the hull with antifouling paint is extra."

It must suck balls to be rich.
 
2013-05-28 01:46:22 PM

Mose: I've been to the Newport (RI) boat show a few times... there was a company a few years back that had a sailboat with a hull designed to fit in a standard shipping container.  So yeah, like a six foot beam, tons of freeboard, and just the most hideous thing every.  I don't know if the cheaper shipping would be worth dealing with such a terrible hull and being the butt of a lot of jokes.

Not that I'd ever know or care.

/not rich
//knows how to sail


my friend just bought a 20 ft sailboat, and he has no idea how to sail it.   I'm trying to convince him we need to take it out on a lake and just go for it.   It doesn't have a motor, we'd just have to figure it out.
 
2013-05-28 01:46:40 PM
Dockwise is great, in theory. The reality is that they have a worse on-time rating than US Air. Nothing better than finding out your yacht will be a year late to where you want it to be.
 
2013-05-28 01:47:25 PM
Let's see Paul Allen's boat:

www.winbeta.org

/Patrick Bateman starts crying.
 
2013-05-28 01:47:41 PM
I would have thought this is for moving newly built boats to their new home. But maybe it is also for when you are changing to your seasonal residence.
 
2013-05-28 01:48:03 PM

Rapmaster2000: Pretty slick piece of engineering.

A yacht seems like one of those things I'd have to be insanely rich to purchase because of the costs associated with owning and maintaining one.  I'd basically have to be at a point where I had money to burn.

I'm at more of a 16ft. Alumacraft level of assets.


Yeah and even at this level a boat is a hole in the water you throw money into.
 
2013-05-28 01:49:05 PM
Sort of like posers that trailer their bikes to Sturgis
 
2013-05-28 01:50:51 PM

Girion47: Mose: I've been to the Newport (RI) boat show a few times... there was a company a few years back that had a sailboat with a hull designed to fit in a standard shipping container.  So yeah, like a six foot beam, tons of freeboard, and just the most hideous thing every.  I don't know if the cheaper shipping would be worth dealing with such a terrible hull and being the butt of a lot of jokes.

Not that I'd ever know or care.

/not rich
//knows how to sail

my friend just bought a 20 ft sailboat, and he has no idea how to sail it.   I'm trying to convince him we need to take it out on a lake and just go for it.   It doesn't have a motor, we'd just have to figure it out.


That would probably be a disaster.  I'd go for it.  Don't plan on being allowed back on that particular lake though.

What boat did he buy?
 
2013-05-28 01:51:04 PM

tricycleracer: Let's see Paul Allen's boat:



/Patrick Bateman starts crying.


Well If I was gonna have a yacht larger than HMS dreadnaught Id want a smaller yact in my swimming pool like Calculon.
 
2013-05-28 01:51:46 PM
FTFA: Why sail your multimillion dollar yacht to the Caribbean when you can load it onto a huge 685-foot ship to take if for you?

DailyFail editing ends before the title
 
2013-05-28 01:52:19 PM

Oldiron_79: Rapmaster2000: Pretty slick piece of engineering.

A yacht seems like one of those things I'd have to be insanely rich to purchase because of the costs associated with owning and maintaining one.  I'd basically have to be at a point where I had money to burn.

I'm at more of a 16ft. Alumacraft level of assets.

Yeah and even at this level a boat is a hole in the water you throw money into.


The more hobbies I take on, the more I realize pretty much every hobby is like this unless you can produce something saleable from it.

Non of my hobbies are like that.  They all cost money, but they're all worth it.
 
2013-05-28 01:53:27 PM

dittybopper: factoryconnection: Believe it or not, folks, just as you wouldn't take a canoe into a commercial harbor, not all floating objects are trans-ocean worthy.

Why wouldn't I?

Seems to me I can paddle out of the way of a ship faster than they can run me down.  And if they're going that fast, I might just want to surf my canoe on their bow wave.


Funny! I wonder if anyone will bite?
 
2013-05-28 01:54:00 PM
My yacht has a yacht and its yacht is bigger than your yacht, beeee...yotch!
 
2013-05-28 01:55:00 PM
Trained divers make sure the yachts are secured to the deck of the Yacht Express

Uhm, yeah, I bet they are trained.
Because untrained divers would probably be an entirely different daily fail article.
 
2013-05-28 01:55:55 PM
216.77.188.54
 
2013-05-28 01:56:01 PM
Look at my money!
 
2013-05-28 01:57:22 PM
i.dailymail.co.uk

That little blue boat must be the Fenwick's. Oh the audacity of some people to call that thing a yacht. What nerve.
 
2013-05-28 01:59:49 PM
FTA:  "When the ship launched,John Walsey, a San Francisco real estate tycoon joked to Dockwise that he was so impressed with the facilities inside the Yacht Express that he might ride back across the Atlantic with his 121-foot Broward yacht.'Or maybe I should just charge my crew members for the ride, since this is like being on a cruise ship,' he said."

Fark you, youpretentious ass.  I hope you are the first one into the guillotine.
 
2013-05-28 02:00:25 PM

Mose: Oldiron_79: Rapmaster2000: Pretty slick piece of engineering.

A yacht seems like one of those things I'd have to be insanely rich to purchase because of the costs associated with owning and maintaining one.  I'd basically have to be at a point where I had money to burn.

I'm at more of a 16ft. Alumacraft level of assets.

Yeah and even at this level a boat is a hole in the water you throw money into.

The more hobbies I take on, the more I realize pretty much every hobby is like this unless you can produce something saleable from it.

Non of my hobbies are like that.  They all cost money, but they're all worth it.


Eh.  I have a pool.  It's a time and money sink, but it's pretty sweet on a hot day with a beer.
 
2013-05-28 02:01:02 PM

mainsail: dittybopper: factoryconnection: Believe it or not, folks, just as you wouldn't take a canoe into a commercial harbor, not all floating objects are trans-ocean worthy.

Why wouldn't I?

Seems to me I can paddle out of the way of a ship faster than they can run me down.  And if they're going that fast, I might just want to surf my canoe on their bow wave.

Funny! I wonder if anyone will bite?


Actually, bow wave surfing is a thing.
 
2013-05-28 02:01:43 PM
or the could do it like the Uncles in Secondhand lions-----tiny pond with a yacht that just barely fits in it.
 
2013-05-28 02:04:35 PM
I work in this business.  There are several of these transports that cross the Atlantic twice yearly, at least.  It is much safer to ship the yacht than send the crew to sail it across.

Typically a mega-yacht, say 150'-250' cruises to the Caribbean or Med for the Summer, from Lauderdale, then  returns in the Fall.   For Winter, they go up the US coast, or to the Med.  The owner flies to join his boat when he's in the mood.  The crew will be about 10-20 people at all times.  For the cost of shipping ot across the Atlantic, its well worth it.
 
2013-05-28 02:13:40 PM

Girion47: my friend just bought a 20 ft sailboat, and he has no idea how to sail it.   I'm trying to convince him we need to take it out on a lake and just go for it.   It doesn't have a motor, we'd just have to figure it out.


don't
Get a snark.
it's a disposable solid foam (you can't do much damage as in PROPERTY damage with it) and practice.
Learn to tack.
Tacking is your friend.
If you don't learn how to do it on a small craft and work you way up. . .
well. ever try to teach a chick how to fire a .44 magnum?

You start with a .22 revolver, then go to a .357 with .38 wad cutters in it. then, same frame, put in the .357 mags. then try out a .44 short, then a mag.

you don't just take a boat out and figure it out.

Lived on the ocean and lakes all my life.
 
2013-05-28 02:13:46 PM

dittybopper: Actually, bow wave surfing is a thing.


Technically, if a bow wave is developed it can prevent the actual hull-on-hull striking of small craft.  However, that only happens at a certain speed and ignores the hazards of tugs, tow-lines, smaller power-boats and other things that would endanger a canoe in a major harbor.

Skyd1v: Fark you, youpretentious ass. I hope you are the first one into the guillotine.


Maybe he was, you know... joking, like the section you quoted said explicitly.
 
2013-05-28 02:15:53 PM

tricycleracer: Let's see Paul Allen's boat:


www.winbeta.org

/Patrick Bateman starts crying.

Geez, look at all the Phalanx CIWS emplacements and Star Destroyer-class shield generators!

/military nerd
 
2013-05-28 02:18:06 PM
What annoys me about this isn't the yacht thing, it's  not using it

I can imagine these sort of folks buying a Stradivarius and hanging it on the wall as art rather than playing it
 
2013-05-28 02:18:29 PM

Rapmaster2000: Pretty slick piece of engineering.

A yacht seems like one of those things I'd have to be insanely rich to purchase because of the costs associated with owning and maintaining one.  I'd basically have to be at a point where I had money to burn.

I'm at more of a 16ft. Alumacraft level of assets.


You thousandaires think you're the bee's knees...
 
2013-05-28 02:19:22 PM

Rapmaster2000: Mose: Oldiron_79: Rapmaster2000: Pretty slick piece of engineering.

A yacht seems like one of those things I'd have to be insanely rich to purchase because of the costs associated with owning and maintaining one.  I'd basically have to be at a point where I had money to burn.

I'm at more of a 16ft. Alumacraft level of assets.

Yeah and even at this level a boat is a hole in the water you throw money into.

The more hobbies I take on, the more I realize pretty much every hobby is like this unless you can produce something saleable from it.

Non of my hobbies are like that.  They all cost money, but they're all worth it.

Eh.  I have a pool.  It's a time and money sink, but it's pretty sweet on a hot day with a beer.


Yeah my puny boat is preety sweet when Im catchin fish. Fishing from the bank sucks balls, everywhere you can park a car within reasonable walking distance of the lake is so over fished you cant catch anything.
 
2013-05-28 02:19:25 PM
Yeah, that's it, Subby. Cheer on the gross excesses of the 1% while you eat your macaroni.
 
2013-05-28 02:20:31 PM

grokca: I am Elmer J. Fudd, miwionaire, I own a mansion and a yacht and a yacht to cawwey my yacht.


Leaving satisfied.

/bunnyhop exit with Amanda Bynes
 
2013-05-28 02:20:56 PM

Mose: I've been to the Newport (RI) boat show a few times... there was a company a few years back that had a sailboat with a hull designed to fit in a standard shipping container.  So yeah, like a six foot beam, tons of freeboard, and just the most hideous thing every.  I don't know if the cheaper shipping would be worth dealing with such a terrible hull and being the butt of a lot of jokes.

Not that I'd ever know or care.

/not rich
//knows how to sail


This one?  Looking at 2:02, it doesn't look THAT bad; the video deceiving?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HyCUSEnVxGs
 
2013-05-28 02:22:18 PM

Girion47: Mose: I've been to the Newport (RI) boat show a few times... there was a company a few years back that had a sailboat with a hull designed to fit in a standard shipping container.  So yeah, like a six foot beam, tons of freeboard, and just the most hideous thing every.  I don't know if the cheaper shipping would be worth dealing with such a terrible hull and being the butt of a lot of jokes.

Not that I'd ever know or care.

/not rich
//knows how to sail

my friend just bought a 20 ft sailboat, and he has no idea how to sail it.   I'm trying to convince him we need to take it out on a lake and just go for it.   It doesn't have a motor, we'd just have to figure it out.


I don't care how shallow the lake is:  TAKE SOMEONE WHO KNOWS HOW TO SAIL WITH YOU.

That is all.
 
2013-05-28 02:23:04 PM

vudukungfu


You start with a .22 revolver, then go to a .357 with .38 wad cutters in it. then, same frame, put in the .357 mags. then try out a .44 short, then a mag.


A .44 Special would make more sense here. Finding an actual .44 Short firearm seems excessive when you can just put Specials in a Magnum wheelgun.
 
2013-05-28 02:23:10 PM

peterthx: tricycleracer: Let's see Paul Allen's boat:

[www.winbeta.org image 450x298]

/Patrick Bateman starts crying.

Geez, look at all the Phalanx CIWS emplacements and Star Destroyer-class shield generators!

/military nerd


Better hope no stray A-Wings come around, lest it crash into a space station or something.
 
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