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(Cracked)   Here are 5 celebrities you did not know were badass soldiers, because we are going to put happy trees over there, right maggot?   (cracked.com) divider line 49
    More: Interesting, drill sergeants, happy tree, positive reinforcement, Army Air Corps, Jimmy Stewart, Mister Rogers, It's a Wonderful Life, Kansas City Fire Department  
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28992 clicks; posted to Main » on 27 May 2013 at 5:05 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Smartest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Archived thread
2013-05-27 01:14:32 PM  
7 votes:

albert71292: They omitted this one...

[i88.photobucket.com image 393x480]


No, they're talking about celebrities you DIDN'T know was a badass. Audie Murphy became a celebrity BECAUSE he was a badass.
2013-05-27 03:56:41 PM  
4 votes:
fta #5. Bob Ross Was a Drill Sergeant

img.photobucket.com
2013-05-27 12:47:01 PM  
4 votes:
They omitted this one...

i88.photobucket.com
2013-05-27 06:28:15 PM  
3 votes:
Ted Williams scoffs at being left off this list. Then he wins the Triple Crown anyway, hits the last .400 season in baseball, gets his Marine Aviator wings flying a Corsair in WWII, comes back to play five more seasons of baseball including the 1946 World Series, then he goes off to fly 39 combat missions in jets strafing the commie hoardes in Korea with John Glenn before playing seven more years to cap off a Hall of Fame baseball career.

So, what did you do today?
2013-05-27 05:51:07 PM  
3 votes:
I'll see your Air Force drill instructor and raise with a Marine Corps drill instructor:

oi42.tinypic.com

WWII veteran with the Marines, wounded in combat at Guadalcanal, spent about a year hospitalized with blackwater fever.  The bullet and the virus missed it by *that* much.
2013-05-27 05:46:30 PM  
3 votes:

bearded clamorer: List fails without Charles Durning.


True. I didin't even know about all the shiat Durning went through until after he died.

It appears 40% of the list aren't actually soldiers and with all due respect to Bob Ross his entry didn't make any sense. It sounds like he did his job in Alaska (where we don't do USAF basic) and nobody actually spends an entire 20 years as an instructor unless they actually want to be. It's a stepping stone of career advancement for most. Then I went back to the article linked by Cracked and saw that he wasn't a drill sergeant. He was a First Sergeant, which actually makes sense.

The writer is probably too stupid to know the difference since he also didn't know the that firement and street thugs aren't soldiers either.
2013-05-27 03:34:48 PM  
3 votes:
Mel Brooks was a combat engineer who fought in the Battle of the Bulge.

Jason Robards has his destroyer sunk at the Battle of Guadalcanal.

Lee Marvin got shot in the ass at the Battle of Saipan.

James Garner received two Purple Hearts in the Korean War.

Ed McMahon was a forward artillery observer in the Korean War.

James Blunt was a captain in a recon battalion in Kosovo.
2013-05-27 02:42:50 PM  
3 votes:
List fails without Charles Durning.
2013-05-28 01:24:58 AM  
2 votes:
Air Force drill sergeant is a badass?  I'm pretty sure it's closer to Den Mother.
2013-05-27 09:23:32 PM  
2 votes:
Airborne
www.biography.com

badass for other reasons
2013-05-27 06:54:16 PM  
2 votes:

Korzine: I may be mistaken, but somehow I don't think friendly fire is generally considered taking one for the team.


Unless your name is Patrick Tillman.
2013-05-27 06:14:29 PM  
2 votes:

The DBS: bifford: Our concept of "badass" is often ridiculous.  How many of us have actually fought in a war?  How many of us are members of a street gang?  How many of us have actually got into a serious fight?  I wager that none of us have met many true badasses and thus have no realistic concept of what they really resemble.

My son killed 3 men in combat last year. His patrol got ambushed, one of his Marines got shot, the kid patched him up while getting shot at, then used his own body to shield his patient while returning fire. He's pretty badass for a Sailor.


Your son is a bonafide badass.
2013-05-27 05:10:04 PM  
2 votes:
No Eddie Albert?
2013-05-27 04:01:19 PM  
2 votes:
I'm glad Christopher Lee wasn't on the list... because everyone already knows he's a badass.
2013-05-27 01:55:02 PM  
2 votes:
It's a great story, but firefighter does not equal soldier, even with 9/11.

Substitute Dr. Ruth for Buscemi and we'll be fine.
2013-05-27 12:03:54 PM  
2 votes:
missed one -

coolaggregator.files.wordpress.com
2013-05-27 10:59:25 AM  
2 votes:
List would fail without Jimmy Stewart and James Doohan. List doesn't fail.
2013-05-27 11:12:00 PM  
1 votes:
I love how all of the mom's boy that live in their parents basement while still suckling their mommas dried up teets love to call John Wayne a pussy. Let's time travel back to the 50's kids and let's watch one of you vegan asswipes walk up to him and say it to his face.......

Makes no difference if he served or not, he inspired Americans to buy war bonds and to hate Nazi's and slopes even more than we already did.

Just like we do Muslims today.
2013-05-27 09:45:54 PM  
1 votes:

zeppo: WeenerGord: Fissile: During WWII  Stars and Stripes, the official Army newspaper, took a survey of GIs and asked them to name the person they hated the most.   Frank Sinatra came in first,


Why did they hate Frank Sinatra?

1. He was good looking

2. He was home with all the man less girls

and mostly:

3.  He supposedly dodged the draft by putting a hole in his eardrum


============

This.  He talked tough, and made war propaganda movies while he dodged the draft.   Do as I say, not as I do.
2013-05-27 09:11:01 PM  
1 votes:
upload.wikimedia.org

Developed radio wave spread-spectrum frequency-hopping, in order to make guided torpedoes harder to jam.

/No, really.
//That IS Hedy.
2013-05-27 08:38:57 PM  
1 votes:

OtherLittleGuy: lifeboat: I'll see your Air Force drill instructor and raise with a Marine Corps drill instructor:

[oi42.tinypic.com image 253x320]

WWII veteran with the Marines, wounded in combat at Guadalcanal, spent about a year hospitalized with blackwater fever.  The bullet and the virus missed it by *that* much.

[www.supernaturalwiki.com image 320x400]

Son-in-law: USMC, Vietnam. Marine Reverse until 1976.


Your son in law is Bobby from Supernatural?
2013-05-27 08:32:55 PM  
1 votes:
Sorry, Cracked. First sergeant != Drill sergeant. If Ross was a drill sergeant, he'd be painting pictures of the Alamo, not Alaskan landscapes.
2013-05-27 08:32:27 PM  
1 votes:
Nothing but respect for Steve Buscemi.
2013-05-27 08:16:16 PM  
1 votes:

OtherLittleGuy: lifeboat: I'll see your Air Force drill instructor and raise with a Marine Corps drill instructor:

[oi42.tinypic.com image 253x320]

WWII veteran with the Marines, wounded in combat at Guadalcanal, spent about a year hospitalized with blackwater fever.  The bullet and the virus missed it by *that* much.

[www.supernaturalwiki.com image 320x400]

Son-in-law: USMC, Vietnam. Marine Reverse until 1976.


Was just watching 4th season of Breaking Bad and when he showed up my wife and I just looked at each other and said "Ellsworth!"  I found his diction and his script could have easily been lifted from a scene in Deadwood and I wasn't sure if that was done intentionally for his cameo or if that's just his style of delivery. I plan on watching Justified at some point so I guess I'll find out.
2013-05-27 08:05:31 PM  
1 votes:

Ral: My granddad wasn't a famous actor, but he was a ball turret gunner in a B-17 in the European theater.  He got shot down so many times his parachute log looked like a dictionary.  And he survived the war.  He died in 1987.


Granddad had balls of steel. They were all heroes and they'll all tell you that the real heroes never came home.
2013-05-27 07:17:10 PM  
1 votes:

Peter von Nostrand: Noticeably absent "tough guy" John Wayne


John Wayne was a less annoying version of Ted Nugent.
2013-05-27 07:08:41 PM  
1 votes:
I've seen Eddie Albert mentioned here a few times, here's what he did. If you're familiar with Tarawa you'll know that what he did was no small feat.
"During the Battle of Tarawa, one of the bloodiest battles of World War II and in the history of the U.S. Marine Corps, Albert was credited with rescuing up to 70 wounded Marines while under enemy fire. He was awarded the Bronze Star with a combat "V". He did not speak about this publicly until it was mentioned in several television documentaries about the battle in the 1990s."
2013-05-27 06:59:49 PM  
1 votes:
Neville Brand - Won the Silver Star in Europe during WW2.  Wounded twice in combat, second time almost killed him.  Fought in the Ardenne.
4.bp.blogspot.com
2013-05-27 06:59:10 PM  
1 votes:

jackmalice: Kyosuke: Peter von Nostrand: Noticeably absent "tough guy" John Wayne

He had more important business to attend to...

[a0.vsoh.com image 332x538]

John Wayne was gay.

/I know, because I installed a one-way mirror in his guest bedroom.


Guy I used to work with had a fun Wayne story: apparently he worked for a restaurant that did deliveries to hotels. So he goes up to the room with the food and some guy in the room pulls the "Do you know who this is?" routine. It was later in Wayne's life and he doesn't recognize him and says so. Wayne was so pissed he got the delivery man (my co-worker) fired.

/csb
2013-05-27 06:56:01 PM  
1 votes:
List is useless without Eddie Albert and James Arness.
2013-05-27 06:47:58 PM  
1 votes:
Born in 1929.  Member of the Dutch Resistance 1941-1945.
1.bp.blogspot.com
2013-05-27 06:45:33 PM  
1 votes:

Kyosuke: Peter von Nostrand: Noticeably absent "tough guy" John Wayne

He had more important business to attend to...

[a0.vsoh.com image 332x538]


John Wayne was gay.

/I know, because I installed a one-way mirror in his guest bedroom.
2013-05-27 06:39:22 PM  
1 votes:
Then there's Maude.  USMC WWII.
2013-05-27 06:38:21 PM  
1 votes:

mafiageek1980: Damn, as if Steve Buscemi couldn't get any COOLER!


Jack Nicholson was a volunteer firefighter. When he hacks down the door in The Shining, it's a real door.
2013-05-27 06:32:51 PM  
1 votes:
Charles Bronson.  US Army Air Corps WWII.  Wounded in combat.

3.bp.blogspot.com
2013-05-27 06:30:45 PM  
1 votes:
Drew Carey was in the Marine Corps Reserve.

static6.businessinsider.com
2013-05-27 06:30:21 PM  
1 votes:
Julia Child
2013-05-27 06:21:12 PM  
1 votes:
Art Carney.  US Army WWII.  Wounded in combat.

image2.findagrave.com
2013-05-27 06:16:17 PM  
1 votes:

Peter von Nostrand: Noticeably absent "tough guy" John Wayne


Because he never served in the military. He was exempt due to his age and family status. He was classified as 3-A (family deferment).
2013-05-27 06:12:56 PM  
1 votes:
James Garner.  Korean War US Army.  Wounded in combat.

i215.photobucket.com
2013-05-27 06:07:40 PM  
1 votes:
Dennis Franz.  US Army.  Vietnam vet.

static.tvgcdn.net
2013-05-27 06:00:50 PM  
1 votes:

bifford: Our concept of "badass" is often ridiculous.  How many of us have actually fought in a war?  How many of us are members of a street gang?  How many of us have actually got into a serious fight?  I wager that none of us have met many true badasses and thus have no realistic concept of what they really resemble.


My son killed 3 men in combat last year. His patrol got ambushed, one of his Marines got shot, the kid patched him up while getting shot at, then used his own body to shield his patient while returning fire. He's pretty badass for a Sailor.
2013-05-27 05:57:45 PM  
1 votes:
Rod Serling.  Paratrooper.  Wounded in combat.

geektyrant.com
2013-05-27 05:39:15 PM  
1 votes:
I knew about Stewart and Doohan - hard not to, if you're a fan of them. However, I didn't know about Steve Buscemi's firefighting career, or his staunch support for it - and I liked the fact that he actively discouraged publicity for it, because it's not about limelight.  And, the more I learn about Bob Ross, the more I respect the man.

Adding Vidal to that list seems incongruous, however - not that I don't respect his efforts, but that his efforts were vigilante in nature compared to the service of the other four.
2013-05-27 05:24:35 PM  
1 votes:
No Eddie Albert ? No Ernest Borgnine?
2013-05-27 05:16:21 PM  
1 votes:

Are you kidding me? Two web pages for five people?


Here they are. Fark you, Cracked.com

1) James Doohan
2) Vidal Sassoon
3) Steve Buscemi
4) Jimmy Stewart
5) Bob Ross

2013-05-27 05:06:11 PM  
1 votes:
No Bob Denver or Mister Rogers?
2013-05-27 02:50:10 PM  
1 votes:

bearded clamorer: List fails without Charles Durning.


He can go in and replace Buscemi.
2013-05-27 02:22:55 PM  
1 votes:

OtherLittleGuy: It's a great story, but firefighter does not equal soldier, even with 9/11.

Substitute Dr. Ruth for Buscemi and we'll be fine.


This.
Firefighters are better.
 
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