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(Daily Mail)   The secret of Anteater Jesus is solved   (dailymail.co.uk) divider line 56
    More: Followup, Anteater Jesus, Connecticut, anteaters, stock photos, biology, zoos  
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10527 clicks; posted to Main » on 27 May 2013 at 3:22 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-05-27 12:12:48 AM
i.imgur.com
 
2013-05-27 12:27:00 AM
Water into wine, biatch...
0.media.collegehumor.cvcdn.com
 
2013-05-27 12:39:22 AM
Immaculate Aardvark would be a great band name
 
2013-05-27 01:28:53 AM
He died for our insects.
 
2013-05-27 01:50:26 AM

MaudlinMutantMollusk: Immaculate Aardvark would be a great band name


Anteater Jesus doesn't suck either.
 
2013-05-27 01:53:55 AM

Triumph: Water into wine, biatch...
[0.media.collegehumor.cvcdn.com image 800x729]


Not sure I'd give alcoholic beverages to something that can slice open a Pinto if he's an angry drunk.
 
2013-05-27 01:58:59 AM

vossiewulf: MaudlinMutantMollusk: Immaculate Aardvark would be a great band name

Anteater Jesus doesn't suck either.


Neither would Anteater Christ
 
2013-05-27 03:26:55 AM
Is that last picture a shoop? It looks totally fake. Also LOL @ walking your anteater on a leash.
 
2013-05-27 03:29:14 AM
How do you "solve" a secret?
 
2013-05-27 03:33:52 AM
Immaculate conception? I didn't realize anteaters possessed original sin.
 
2013-05-27 03:35:21 AM
Uhhh.... Life will, uhhh.... find a way.
 
2013-05-27 03:39:56 AM
Good job, Daily Fail, on posting a picture of an adult aardvark on a leash and calling it a newborn anteater.
 
2013-05-27 03:43:16 AM
Dammit Jim, I'm a journalist not a zoologist!
 
2013-05-27 03:43:48 AM
It would figure, though, that a creature leftover from the last Ice Age would be able to store embryos in its uterus for extended periods.
 
2013-05-27 03:43:53 AM
Grandpa said all the anteaters were girls.
 
2013-05-27 03:52:09 AM
Life, ah, hmm, finds a, umm, hoo, way.
 
2013-05-27 03:55:18 AM
"It's not virgin birth in the strict sense of the phrase..."

It's not a virgin birth in any sense, dumbass.
 
2013-05-27 04:05:02 AM
So, more like this, then:

lh6.googleusercontent.com
 
2013-05-27 04:12:01 AM
bs
 
2013-05-27 04:13:14 AM
Hey! Has anyone checked the anteater's midichlorian count?
 
2013-05-27 04:22:56 AM

jsfrancis: "It's not virgin birth in the strict sense of the phrase..."

It's not a virgin birth in any sense, dumbass.



FTFA:

"During such cases, the embryo grows and develops in the absence of fertilization.
It sounds unusual-some might even say miraculous-but it's a surprisingly common occurrence in the animal kingdom."

I'd also like to put this forward for ridicule.

/Although tabloids have devalued the word miracle so much to mean "anything with a less than 50% chance of happening", maybe it does fit here.
//Also, that baby anteater is cute as hell.
 
2013-05-27 04:23:26 AM
Glad that got sorted out. I was starting to get worried...
 
2013-05-27 04:33:54 AM
If it had been an armadillo it'd have turned into a Superhero with the power to fling LEPROSY at you.
 
2013-05-27 04:41:35 AM
I have an ex-girlfriend that used this excuse on me too.
 
2013-05-27 05:13:52 AM
Oh, for the love of Christ! The Immaculate Conception refers to Mary being born without sin, not the birth of Jesus! Can people at least have a basic understanding of their own faith? Please?
 
2013-05-27 05:43:04 AM

Ed Grubermann: Oh, for the love of Christ! The Immaculate Conception refers to Mary being born without sin, not the birth of Jesus! Can people at least have a basic understanding of their own faith? Please?


"Let he who is without sin cast the first stone."
BONK!
"Ow!  Thanks a lot, Mom!"
 
2013-05-27 06:03:34 AM
Pretty soon we'll have the birth of the Anti-anteater

/then all hell will break loose
 
2013-05-27 06:09:40 AM

2wolves: He died for our insects.


s15.postimg.org
 
2013-05-27 06:21:10 AM
i.imgur.com
 
2013-05-27 06:24:41 AM

fusillade762:


Are you not entertained?
 
2013-05-27 06:29:41 AM
My heart aches and a drowsy numbness pains
My senses, as though an anteater I'd seen
(panic spreads and the audience half rise)
A nasty long-nosed brute
(screams from the audience)
With furry legs and sticky darting tongue
I seem to feel its cruel jaws
Crunch crunch there go my legs
Snap snap my thorax too
(various screaming women faint)
My head's in a twain, there goes my brain
Swallow, swallow, swallow, slurp(he loses control)
 
2013-05-27 06:39:44 AM

Ed Grubermann: Oh, for the love of Christ! The Immaculate Conception refers to Mary being born without sin, not the birth of Jesus! Can people at least have a basic understanding of their own faith? Please?


Wait a minute are you some kind of catholic idoleter?
/Sorry : )
 
2013-05-27 06:55:52 AM
Goofity looking little things, aren't they?
 
2013-05-27 07:07:55 AM

Ed Grubermann: Oh, for the love of Christ! The Immaculate Conception refers to Mary being born without sin, not the birth of Jesus! Can people at least have a basic understanding of their own faith? Please?


About 40 percent of Christians worldwide (and 3/4 of U.S. Christians)mdon't believe in it, and aren't taught it in church, so not part a basic of their faith. Strictly a Catholic doctrine. The Virgin Birth is universally taught to Christians, thus Anteater Jesus.
 
2013-05-27 07:34:57 AM
So, it is just as I suggested in the last "Anteater Jesus" thread:

Not sure why this is so surprising. Kangaroos do this all the time. Delayed implantation. Can even do it for years, in fact. And when they are enjoying a time of plenty (plenty of food & water, etc.), they can pop em out one right after another - as soon as one is out of the pouch, the next one goes "in the oven", so to speak. So, in a zoo, they'd be doing that all the time....

Then I was "dismissed" by some other Farker (tenton):
According to TFA:
Stacey Belhumeur, species survival plan coordinator for the North American population of giant anteaters, and a zookeeper at Reid Park Zoo in Tucson, Ariz., said delayed implantation coinciding with another pregnancy has been observed in marsupials, but that it wasn't likely in giant anteaters.
"When she gives birth, her entire uterus is going to clear out," Belhumeur said. "Anything that's in her uterus, even another undeveloped embryo, would clear out."
Delayed implantation isn't something generally seen in placental mammals. So, it doesn't seem likely (not impossible, but probably unlikely)

So I was RIGHT, then. But I bet we won't see Tenton in this thread, admitting it. ;-)
 
2013-05-27 07:40:36 AM
 
2013-05-27 07:52:08 AM
They are just trying to cover up the fact that someone at the zoo was banging the anteater.
 
2013-05-27 07:54:57 AM
bigbaddie.com
 
2013-05-27 08:05:06 AM

mbillips: Ed Grubermann: Oh, for the love of Christ! The Immaculate Conception refers to Mary being born without sin, not the birth of Jesus! Can people at least have a basic understanding of their own faith? Please?

About 40 percent of Christians worldwide (and 3/4 of U.S. Christians)mdon't believe in it, and aren't taught it in church, so not part a basic of their faith. Strictly a Catholic doctrine. The Virgin Birth is universally taught to Christians, thus Anteater Jesus.


It doesn't matter if you are Catholic or not, the Immaculate Conception does not refer to the conception of Jesus.
 
2013-05-27 08:07:14 AM
"I was naked and you gave me ants. I was thirsty and you gave me ants. I was hungry and you gave me ants."

I wonder this baby is the Anty Christ.
 
2013-05-27 08:13:08 AM

HTApprovedChick: Good job, Daily Fail, on posting a picture of an adult aardvark on a leash and calling it a newborn anteater.


Yeah came to say that.
 
2013-05-27 08:31:11 AM
Conception  conception |kənˈsep shən|noun1the action of conceiving a child or  of a child being conceived:an unfertilized egg before conception|a rise in premarital conceptions.•the forming or devising  of a plan or idea:the time between a product's conception and its launch.


 So was it the kid or the product?
 
2013-05-27 08:39:41 AM

Tellurium: Immaculate conception? I didn't realize anteaters possessed original sin.


This is the anteater that's going to give birth to the messiah. It had to be pure.

/i can tell you're catholic.
//or at least know your shiat.
 
2013-05-27 08:58:35 AM
Anteater Jesus
Anteater Jesus
Anteater Jesus hates Raptor Jesus
They have a fight
Raptor wins
Anteater Jesus
 
2013-05-27 09:05:49 AM

Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: How do you "solve" a secret?


I can't answer that...
 
2013-05-27 09:43:21 AM
So females can just shut that whole thing down? Does candidate Rapey McRaperape know about this?
 
2013-05-27 09:45:16 AM
Anteater, Schmanteater. He was a Jew.
Jews are circumcised at birth.
He was a helmet.
 
2013-05-27 09:48:56 AM
I'm confused. Where does the ardvaark come into play in all this? Was he banging the anteater?
 
2013-05-27 10:19:02 AM

Ed Grubermann: mbillips: Ed Grubermann: Oh, for the love of Christ! The Immaculate Conception refers to Mary being born without sin, not the birth of Jesus! Can people at least have a basic understanding of their own faith? Please?

About 40 percent of Christians worldwide (and 3/4 of U.S. Christians)mdon't believe in it, and aren't taught it in church, so not part a basic of their faith. Strictly a Catholic doctrine. The Virgin Birth is universally taught to Christians, thus Anteater Jesus.

It doesn't matter if you are Catholic or not, the Immaculate Conception does not refer to the conception of Jesus.


No, but the phrase "understanding of your own faith" doesn't apply to most Farkers, because they're not Catholic.
 
2013-05-27 10:25:52 AM
HATERS
sougenladiescon.files.wordpress.com
GONNA BURN IN HELL
 
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