If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Buzzfeed)   Survey reveals men think women's beauty peaks at age 29. Reversely, women think men peak during every aggressive handshake   (buzzfeed.com) divider line 37
    More: Amusing  
•       •       •

6499 clicks; posted to Main » on 22 May 2013 at 4:31 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Archived thread
2013-05-22 04:01:19 PM  
8 votes:
In my experience, men tend to peak about 6 minutes too soon.
2013-05-22 04:36:53 PM  
6 votes:

CapeFearCadaver: No. She just doesn't want anything to do with you anymore. You should try to be nice to her once in a while and you might get some ;)


But I am nice to her, why just the other day I did all the laundry. I took it down to the basement, got it all washed and dried, then brought it back up stairs and left on the bed for her to fold like she's supposed to.
2013-05-22 04:41:55 PM  
4 votes:

Lets talk frankly about internal cleanliness: *looks at wife*

So... that's as good as it's gonna get.

I need a good hobby, something that will take up my time... like the next 40 years of it.


How about "chasing younger women"?
2013-05-23 06:08:35 AM  
3 votes:
d24w6bsrhbeh9d.cloudfront.net
2013-05-22 04:43:04 PM  
3 votes:

impaler: Men self report that "they think" beauty peaks at 29.

Actually, it's 19.


Sorry, 26 is the correct answer. I've done the math. Calculus was involved.

Your opinion is invalid.
2013-05-22 04:42:37 PM  
3 votes:

miss diminutive: In my experience, men tend to peak about 6 minutes too soon.


Is it our fault that you are hot and skillful at doing that thing with the peanut oil and small stuffed walrus?
2013-05-22 04:40:43 PM  
3 votes:
*looks at wife*

So... that's as good as it's gonna get.

I need a good hobby, something that will take up my time... like the next 40 years of it.
2013-05-22 05:25:39 PM  
2 votes:
I'm 41 and have learned to peak by myself quite fine. Thank Gid since I'm so old.
2013-05-22 05:17:01 PM  
2 votes:

IdBeCrazyIf: I never peak, she usually taps out and I'm left to lay there and try and jack it


"Try", what are you a T-Rex?
2013-05-22 05:14:13 PM  
2 votes:

calm like a bomb: thisisyourbrainonFark: This is a very disappointing thread.

The pic in your profile is somewhat disturbing.


It was a weird time.
2013-05-22 05:04:53 PM  
2 votes:

DreamyAltarBoy: Less than average women peak at 19 because the blush of youth is all they've got, average women peak at about 29, but truly beautiful women are a joy forever.


Very insightful, but you lost me with the Hallmarkesque business at the end.
2013-05-22 04:40:23 PM  
2 votes:

Mega Steve: Shake hands with a woman?


Now with pic "goodness"
img69.imageshack.us
2013-05-22 04:32:24 PM  
2 votes:
I never peak, she usually taps out and I'm left to lay there and try and jack it
2013-05-22 10:29:02 PM  
1 votes:

DreamyAltarBoy: Less than average women peak at 19 because the blush of youth is all they've got, average women peak at about 29, but truly beautiful women are a joy forever.


And speaking of English majors, tonight's Plagiarize John Keats winner is......
2013-05-22 09:11:49 PM  
1 votes:

The One True TheDavid: IdBeCrazyIf:

I never peak, she usually taps out and I'm left to lay there and try and jack it

In my 30s that happened all the time, a side-effect of Zoloft. Half the time I hardly felt anything myself, I'd just practice my rhythm and technique. For women who wanted it to last it was fine; for those who wanted me to get off it was frustrating.

Then around 40 Zoloft stopped improving my mood and I had to switch to Celexa, which didn't have that side effect. In fact it did the reverse: two minutes of "WOW! This feels fanTAStic!" -- followed by three minutes of ecstasy with my eyes rolling back into my head and my heart pounding really hard, then two minutes of apologizing, then going right to sleep. It got so I'd avoid sex because it caused too much guilt and embarrassment. (Is it any wonder I've been single for 4 years and ain't had sex in 5?)

OTOH jacking off takes me an hour: by the time I get close my arm is TIRED. It's almost not worth the trouble: I can always just drink till I go to sleep.

Anyway. These days I'd just as soon pay for a BJ, after which walk her to the door, shake her hand, thank her sincerely, and then go straight to sleep. (EIP!)

Failing that, well, Heaven Hill Rum is $7 a fifth. YMMV.


I feel a lot better about myself now....but feel bad for you.
2013-05-22 08:48:25 PM  
1 votes:

God-is-a-Taco: The physical peak I'd say is around 17. You can't really say that in public, though.


Seventeen year olds can be very physically attractive but then they open their mouths and something terrible comes out...Words. Words chosen by a seventeen year old brain. Their beauty dissolves away and I find myself wanting to be as far away as I can from this hideous creature that won't stop spouting idiocy.
I think age limits protect children from perverts and the sanity of normal adults from temptation.
2013-05-22 06:06:08 PM  
1 votes:

spiderpaz: StrandedInAZ: I think women peak at 40.

Full disclosure: I'm 40, and I think I look better than I did at 29. It may just be that I know so much more than I did back then, which makes me more confident, which makes me look better. I certainly get hit on more now than I did back then. Who knows?

That's just your eyesight going out and your memory losing clarity.


Just be kind and don't tell her *why* she's getting hit on more now.
2013-05-22 06:05:02 PM  
1 votes:

StrandedInAZ: I think women peak at 40.

Full disclosure: I'm 40, and I think I look better than I did at 29. It may just be that I know so much more than I did back then, which makes me more confident, which makes me look better. I certainly get hit on more now than I did back then. Who knows?


That's just your eyesight going out and your memory losing clarity.
2013-05-22 06:03:12 PM  
1 votes:

spiderpaz: IMO physically they peak around 22.  However they are too sexually timid and inexperienced and lack sensuality at that age, so it takes them a few years to reach their sexiness peak at 28 ... then their boobs go flat and they start getting cottage cheese dimples.  But we love em anyway, because we're not getting any younger either.


Except that men age like a fine wine, women age like milk.
2013-05-22 06:01:56 PM  
1 votes:
IMO physically they peak around 22.  However they are too sexually timid and inexperienced and lack sensuality at that age, so it takes them a few years to reach their sexiness peak at 28 ... then their boobs go flat and they start getting cottage cheese dimples.  But we love em anyway, because we're not getting any younger either.
2013-05-22 06:01:30 PM  
1 votes:

DreamyAltarBoy: Less than average women peak at 19 because the blush of youth is all they've got, average women peak at about 29, but truly beautiful women are a joy forever.


Well, at least until the freezer burn sets in.
2013-05-22 05:35:20 PM  
1 votes:

Rwa2play: miss diminutive: In my experience, men tend to peak about 6 minutes too soon.

Heh...it amazes me when we men sell ourselves as studs yet can't farking do even sex right.


I prefer odd sex. Really odd sex.
2013-05-22 05:33:13 PM  
1 votes:
it's actually whatever age Mila Kunis is.
2013-05-22 05:27:21 PM  
1 votes:

UrukHaiGuyz: DreamyAltarBoy: Less than average women peak at 19 because the blush of youth is all they've got, average women peak at about 29, but truly beautiful women are a joy forever.

Very insightful, but you lost me with the Hallmarkesque business at the end.


Learn to roll with the cheese, keep a straight face, believe it as you say it, but don't spread it on too thick.
2013-05-22 05:26:14 PM  
1 votes:
Thank gid I thanked gid
2013-05-22 05:19:07 PM  
1 votes:

StrandedInAZ: I'm sorry. I didn't know I was only allowed to respond to posts directed at me personally.


Just seems odd that someone who is as secure with moving into her autumn years as you claim to be would take the time to hold yourself up as an contrary example to what was obviously a dickish joke.

In the future, you should read the way your words come across, because they sounded insecure to me. However, if you wanted to post those pics, I'll still take a look. You've still got some time before the gym.

StrandedInAZ: Or maybe you're just an asshole. My money's on that.


I prefer the term "classically masculine"
2013-05-22 05:12:01 PM  
1 votes:
On the day of their first wedding.
2013-05-22 05:04:16 PM  
1 votes:
They peak at 2am.
2013-05-22 05:03:58 PM  
1 votes:
who the fark cares?
2013-05-22 05:03:26 PM  
1 votes:

DreamyAltarBoy: Less than average women peak at 19 because the blush of youth is all they've got, average women peak at about 29, but truly beautiful women are a joy forever.


That's one of the nicest things I've ever read on Fark.
2013-05-22 04:54:46 PM  
1 votes:

Odd Bird: 29?  pfffftttt...they're still emerging from their girl stage.


And sliding comfortably into their shrieky troll stage which lasts just long enough for them to turn into adorable grandmas.

/with the lemon candies and home made cookies
//And the jars of condiments in the fridge that expired a decade ago
2013-05-22 04:54:08 PM  
1 votes:

weirdneighbour: WhippingBoy: StrandedInAZ: I think women peak at 40.

Full disclosure: I'm 40, and I think I look better than I did at 29. It may just be that I know so much more than I did back then, which makes me more confident, which makes me look better. I certainly get hit on more now than I did back then. Who knows?

Are you a man or a woman?
Hmm, I should have asked that too.


It's something I learned the hard way. Let my life serve as a warning to others.
2013-05-22 04:52:30 PM  
1 votes:

WhippingBoy: StrandedInAZ: I think women peak at 40.

Full disclosure: I'm 40, and I think I look better than I did at 29. It may just be that I know so much more than I did back then, which makes me more confident, which makes me look better. I certainly get hit on more now than I did back then. Who knows?

Are you a man or a woman?

Hmm, I should have asked that too.
2013-05-22 04:48:58 PM  
1 votes:

God-is-a-Taco: The physical peak I'd say is around 17. You can't really say that in public, though.


17 year old girls are for looking at and not interacting with, as you will find out if you're ever in a situation where you have to interact with a 17 year old girl.
2013-05-22 04:47:05 PM  
1 votes:
Here to make 'mens lasting time' joke but see I am too late, will have to go with the real thing later.
in
2013-05-22 04:43:50 PM  
1 votes:

IdBeCrazyIf: But I am nice to her, why just the other day I did all the laundry. I took it down to the basement, got it all washed and dried, then brought it back up stairs and left on the bed for her to fold like she's supposed to.


Damn bro, that's like King Arthur-type chivalrous and I'm taking notes.  I thought helping out with the laundry meant hooking the washer up to the water faucet and letting her know when the buzzer goes off.
2013-05-22 04:22:19 PM  
1 votes:
Men self report that "they think" beauty peaks at 29.

Actually, it's 19.
 
Displayed 37 of 37 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
On Twitter





In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report