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(WLKY Louisville)   Man kills self in Notre Dame cathedral in Paris. Tour guide not surprised, says he had a hunch back at the bell tower   (wlky.com) divider line 30
    More: Sad, Notre Dame Cathedral, Le Monde, French capital, European population, Marine Le Pen  
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4502 clicks; posted to Main » on 21 May 2013 at 4:17 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Archived thread
2013-05-21 04:27:20 PM
8 votes:

Snort: For every bad pun in a headline, God kills a puppy.


you sound Quasi-mad-o

/sorry little puppy, but I had to
2013-05-21 04:25:59 PM
6 votes:
So an anti-marriage equality devout catholic kills himself in a cathedral in protest over France legalizing gay marriage.   I don't think anyone has ever failed more at reading comprehension.  Suicide is literally the only sin than cannot be forgiven.  NO confession, no penance.

The biggest knob gobbler in France has a better chance at dining at the left hand of Jesus that this douche.
2013-05-21 04:19:52 PM
5 votes:
I didn't know his name, but his face sure rings a bell. Also, he's a dead ringer for his brother.
2013-05-21 04:49:12 PM
3 votes:

NallTWD: Totally a contender for wordplay headline of the year right here.


I said "anti-gay-marriage advocate leaves man at the altar"
2013-05-21 04:32:26 PM
3 votes:
I thought Alabama already killed Notre Dame?
2013-05-21 04:28:28 PM
3 votes:
Even in the headlines we can find no sanctuary.

I blame subby's quasi-mojo.
2013-05-21 07:10:07 PM
2 votes:
Vectron:

White people celebrating and preserving their heritage = far right wing, racist hater, homophobe, Jebus rode dinosaurs.


Irish people have parades on St. Patrick's to get drunk and celebrate their heritage... Italians do it on Columbus Day (Ok... maybe these aren't the best examples of white, since racist ass white people didn't want to count them for a few generations). But German Americans get the Steuben parade which was even featured on Ferris Bueller... an iconic American film. Basically every Scandinavian and Eastern European country has some festival or parade around the cities where their immigrant communities formed in Canada and America. But yeah... white people, they just can't catch a break or celebrate their heritage. My heart weeps for the oppression they endure.
2013-05-21 05:22:23 PM
2 votes:

ArgusRun: So an anti-marriage equality devout catholic kills himself in a cathedral in protest over France legalizing gay marriage.   I don't think anyone has ever failed more at reading comprehension.  Suicide is literally the only sin than cannot be forgiven.  NO confession, no penance.

The biggest knob gobbler in France has a better chance at dining at the left hand of Jesus that this douche.


If he was willing to blow his brains out because two guys could get married, then he obviously had some major issues. I guess that since gay marriage wasn't outlawed in France anymore, there was nothing to keep him from giving in to his lust for hot man ass and took the easy way out.

One can hope that Fred Phelps and his clan decide to make this their new form of protest.
2013-05-21 04:38:38 PM
2 votes:

ArgusRun: djZorbof: ArgusRun: So an anti-marriage equality devout catholic kills himself in a cathedral in protest over France legalizing gay marriage.   I don't think anyone has ever failed more at reading comprehension.  Suicide is literally the only sin than cannot be forgiven.  NO confession, no penance.

The biggest knob gobbler in France has a better chance at dining at the left hand of Jesus that this douche.

Not true. If you jumped from a high enough place, you could ask for forgiveness on the way down.

Hmmmm.... interesting theological question.  Is the sin in the intent or the resulting action.  Obviously someone who attempts suicide and lives can then confess and repent.  So if someone attempts suicide and then repents before they die are they forgiven?  Is the sin the end result of the successful suicide or the beginning of the attempt?


For this experiment you will need:

A priest
A rube goldberg suicide machine
A stopwatch
A very depressed theist
2013-05-21 04:37:00 PM
2 votes:

unchellmatt: There was a guy who had no arms, got a job ringing the bell at the cathedral. He couldn't pull the bell, so you know, he'd just head butt them.

One day, in order to impress the priests, he really went at it. Knocked himself out stone cold and fell from the tower. Someone asked the priest if he knew who the guy was. "I don't remember his name, but his face rings a bell."


The next day, the dead bell ringer's twin brother comes in for the again vacant bell ringer position. He also has no arms. They lead him up to the bell tower, he runs at the bell, trips and falls to the sidewalk below.

The same two guys walk by.

The first asks, "Do you know him?"

The second guy responds, "No, but he's a dead ringer for the guy we saw yesterday."
2013-05-21 04:23:59 PM
2 votes:
I'm not sure why he's worried about an Islamist takeover of Europe, you know THEY will ban gay marriage.
2013-05-21 04:22:41 PM
2 votes:
There was a guy who had no arms, got a job ringing the bell at the cathedral. He couldn't pull the bell, so you know, he'd just head butt them.

One day, in order to impress the priests, he really went at it. Knocked himself out stone cold and fell from the tower. Someone asked the priest if he knew who the guy was. "I don't remember his name, but his face rings a bell."
gja [TotalFark]
2013-05-22 12:09:10 AM
1 votes:
Subby should have held out and posted it on hump day
2013-05-21 07:38:34 PM
1 votes:
Hugo too far, subby.
2013-05-21 07:35:55 PM
1 votes:

kbronsito: Vectron:

White people celebrating and preserving their heritage = far right wing, racist hater, homophobe, Jebus rode dinosaurs.


Irish people have parades on St. Patrick's to get drunk and celebrate their heritage... Italians do it on Columbus Day (Ok... maybe these aren't the best examples of white, since racist ass white people didn't want to count them for a few generations). But German Americans get the Steuben parade which was even featured on Ferris Bueller... an iconic American film. Basically every Scandinavian and Eastern European country has some festival or parade around the cities where their immigrant communities formed in Canada and America. But yeah... white people, they just can't catch a break or celebrate their heritage. My heart weeps for the oppression they endure.


Every year our Norwegian buddies in Poulsbo (Viking city)  don their horns and light bonfires to celebrate their heritage of rape and pillage.http://http://www.vikingfest.org/parade.htm
No one minds. The food is good.
2013-05-21 06:13:38 PM
1 votes:
i heard he nattered aim-lessly on his blog.  since he was more elder-ly he just spared his detractors from a couple years of more inanity.

/amidoinitrite?
2013-05-21 05:38:41 PM
1 votes:

shazbotuh: "...the man placed a letter on the altar and then shot himself..."


How did a European get a hold of a gun?
2013-05-21 05:13:38 PM
1 votes:
now if only all of them would do that.  and then somehow clean up after themselves.
2013-05-21 04:48:42 PM
1 votes:

generallyso: I was going to ask what a "right-wing historian" is until the line about him being a homophobe and Islamophobe provided clarification.


Yep.

a1.ec-images.myspacecdn.com

...and please continue to do it at historical landmarks, not only does this attract attention, but romanticizes it. With any luck, you'll convince a few more scumbags to kill themselves, and we'll get a domino effect.
2013-05-21 04:38:23 PM
1 votes:
Nothing shows your respect for traditional marriage more than blowing your face off in a church full of children.
2013-05-21 04:36:44 PM
1 votes:

K.B.O. Winston: //first to admit religion can be really weird


Trust me...You are NOT the first...
2013-05-21 04:36:17 PM
1 votes:

K.B.O. Winston: ArgusRun: So an anti-marriage equality devout catholic kills himself in a cathedral in protest over France legalizing gay marriage.   I don't think anyone has ever failed more at reading comprehension.  Suicide is literally the only sin than cannot be forgiven.  NO confession, no penance.

The biggest knob gobbler in France has a better chance at dining at the left hand of Jesus that this douche.

It's such a no-no that in medieval times if someone wanted to kill themselves the preferred method was to drown a baby.  The thinking was, the baby has not yet committed any sins and will go straight to heaven and before the court/mob murders you they have to offer you a priest to whom you can confess all your sins.  Which means you die forgiven and *also* go to heaven.

Religion is weird.

/Catholic
//first to admit religion can be really weird


Are all babies truly without sin? Some babies are assholes.
2013-05-21 04:28:34 PM
1 votes:

ArgusRun: So an anti-marriage equality devout catholic kills himself in a cathedral in protest over France legalizing gay marriage.   I don't think anyone has ever failed more at reading comprehension.  Suicide is literally the only sin than cannot be forgiven.  NO confession, no penance.

The biggest knob gobbler in France has a better chance at dining at the left hand of Jesus that this douche.


Not true. If you jumped from a high enough place, you could ask for forgiveness on the way down.
2013-05-21 04:25:19 PM
1 votes:
www.usmagazine.com
R.I.P
2013-05-21 04:24:29 PM
1 votes:
He'll be here all week; try the crepes.
2013-05-21 04:24:26 PM
1 votes:
Far-Right Ultracatholic = Heavily-Closeted Ultrahypocrite.

He died as he lived, as a massive embarrassment.
2013-05-21 04:22:11 PM
1 votes:
In other news, Fark loses 2 more members after after a pun related murder suicide.
2013-05-21 04:22:08 PM
1 votes:
if it was political... he should have set himself on fire instead of taking the easy way out. DIAF you wuss!
2013-05-21 04:19:23 PM
1 votes:
Are we meant to believe that this is not guerrilla marketing for the new Dan Brown novel?

Because I'm not buying it.
2013-05-21 12:56:26 PM
1 votes:
i2.ytimg.com
We brought that little hunchback with us.
 
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