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(WLKY Louisville)   Man kills self in Notre Dame cathedral in Paris. Tour guide not surprised, says he had a hunch back at the bell tower   (wlky.com) divider line 121
    More: Sad, Notre Dame Cathedral, Le Monde, French capital, European population, Marine Le Pen  
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4510 clicks; posted to Main » on 21 May 2013 at 4:17 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



121 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-05-21 12:11:09 PM  
"I see what you did there."
www.football-england.com
 
2013-05-21 12:31:15 PM  
That works.
 
2013-05-21 12:56:26 PM  
i2.ytimg.com
We brought that little hunchback with us.
 
2013-05-21 04:00:50 PM  
You were robbed, subby. Robbed.
 
2013-05-21 04:19:13 PM  
Totally a contender for wordplay headline of the year right here.
 
2013-05-21 04:19:23 PM  
Are we meant to believe that this is not guerrilla marketing for the new Dan Brown novel?

Because I'm not buying it.
 
2013-05-21 04:19:52 PM  
I didn't know his name, but his face sure rings a bell. Also, he's a dead ringer for his brother.
 
2013-05-21 04:20:04 PM  
BFM identified the man as Dominique Venner, 78.

Bowel Farking Movement?

/nice work slumpmitter
 
2013-05-21 04:21:47 PM  
For every bad pun in a headline, God kills a puppy.
 
2013-05-21 04:22:08 PM  
if it was political... he should have set himself on fire instead of taking the easy way out. DIAF you wuss!
 
2013-05-21 04:22:11 PM  
In other news, Fark loses 2 more members after after a pun related murder suicide.
 
2013-05-21 04:22:41 PM  
There was a guy who had no arms, got a job ringing the bell at the cathedral. He couldn't pull the bell, so you know, he'd just head butt them.

One day, in order to impress the priests, he really went at it. Knocked himself out stone cold and fell from the tower. Someone asked the priest if he knew who the guy was. "I don't remember his name, but his face rings a bell."
 
2013-05-21 04:22:49 PM  
after after after
 
2013-05-21 04:23:59 PM  
I'm not sure why he's worried about an Islamist takeover of Europe, you know THEY will ban gay marriage.
 
2013-05-21 04:24:26 PM  
Far-Right Ultracatholic = Heavily-Closeted Ultrahypocrite.

He died as he lived, as a massive embarrassment.
 
2013-05-21 04:24:29 PM  
He'll be here all week; try the crepes.
 
2013-05-21 04:25:05 PM  
C'est la vie!
 
2013-05-21 04:25:19 PM  
www.usmagazine.com
R.I.P
 
2013-05-21 04:25:39 PM  
Was he that upset about falling out of the 1st round?
 
2013-05-21 04:25:59 PM  
So an anti-marriage equality devout catholic kills himself in a cathedral in protest over France legalizing gay marriage.   I don't think anyone has ever failed more at reading comprehension.  Suicide is literally the only sin than cannot be forgiven.  NO confession, no penance.

The biggest knob gobbler in France has a better chance at dining at the left hand of Jesus that this douche.
 
2013-05-21 04:26:05 PM  
Because if there's one things Muslims love, it's homosexuality...
 
2013-05-21 04:26:18 PM  
Things smelled a little  fishy when they walked on the sewer side of the building.
 
2013-05-21 04:26:21 PM  
He sounds conflicted.   FTA:

"has lashed out against same-sex marriage"

AND?

"future Islamist takeover of France"

/I'm confused
 
2013-05-21 04:26:48 PM  
Great. Now we're going to get another crappy Dan Brown novel.
 
2013-05-21 04:27:20 PM  

Snort: For every bad pun in a headline, God kills a puppy.


you sound Quasi-mad-o

/sorry little puppy, but I had to
 
2013-05-21 04:28:28 PM  
Even in the headlines we can find no sanctuary.

I blame subby's quasi-mojo.
 
2013-05-21 04:28:34 PM  

ArgusRun: So an anti-marriage equality devout catholic kills himself in a cathedral in protest over France legalizing gay marriage.   I don't think anyone has ever failed more at reading comprehension.  Suicide is literally the only sin than cannot be forgiven.  NO confession, no penance.

The biggest knob gobbler in France has a better chance at dining at the left hand of Jesus that this douche.


Not true. If you jumped from a high enough place, you could ask for forgiveness on the way down.
 
2013-05-21 04:28:37 PM  
oh cool..puns in headlines. so that puppy is safe
 
2013-05-21 04:32:26 PM  
I thought Alabama already killed Notre Dame?
 
2013-05-21 04:33:11 PM  

ArgusRun: So an anti-marriage equality devout catholic kills himself in a cathedral in protest over France legalizing gay marriage.   I don't think anyone has ever failed more at reading comprehension.  Suicide is literally the only sin than cannot be forgiven.  NO confession, no penance.

The biggest knob gobbler in France has a better chance at dining at the left hand of Jesus that this douche.


It's such a no-no that in medieval times if someone wanted to kill themselves the preferred method was to drown a baby.  The thinking was, the baby has not yet committed any sins and will go straight to heaven and before the court/mob murders you they have to offer you a priest to whom you can confess all your sins.  Which means you die forgiven and *also* go to heaven.

Religion is weird.

/Catholic
//first to admit religion can be really weird
 
2013-05-21 04:33:24 PM  

busy chillin': oh cool..puns in headlines. so that puppy is safe


Phew!
 
2013-05-21 04:34:04 PM  
Hope your petite morte was worth it, Subliette.
 
2013-05-21 04:34:07 PM  

djZorbof: ArgusRun: So an anti-marriage equality devout catholic kills himself in a cathedral in protest over France legalizing gay marriage.   I don't think anyone has ever failed more at reading comprehension.  Suicide is literally the only sin than cannot be forgiven.  NO confession, no penance.

The biggest knob gobbler in France has a better chance at dining at the left hand of Jesus that this douche.

Not true. If you jumped from a high enough place, you could ask for forgiveness on the way down.


Hmmmm.... interesting theological question.  Is the sin in the intent or the resulting action.  Obviously someone who attempts suicide and lives can then confess and repent.  So if someone attempts suicide and then repents before they die are they forgiven?  Is the sin the end result of the successful suicide or the beginning of the attempt?
 
2013-05-21 04:34:31 PM  
I was going to ask what a "right-wing historian" is until the line about him being a homophobe and Islamophobe provided clarification.
 
2013-05-21 04:34:49 PM  

djZorbof: Not true. If you jumped from a high enough place, you could ask for forgiveness on the way down.


I don't think the sin actually occurs till you succeed, though.
 
2013-05-21 04:35:25 PM  
applause.gif

Nicely played.
 
2013-05-21 04:35:52 PM  

K.B.O. Winston: ArgusRun: So an anti-marriage equality devout catholic kills himself in a cathedral in protest over France legalizing gay marriage.   I don't think anyone has ever failed more at reading comprehension.  Suicide is literally the only sin than cannot be forgiven.  NO confession, no penance.

The biggest knob gobbler in France has a better chance at dining at the left hand of Jesus that this douche.

It's such a no-no that in medieval times if someone wanted to kill themselves the preferred method was to drown a baby.  The thinking was, the baby has not yet committed any sins and will go straight to heaven and before the court/mob murders you they have to offer you a priest to whom you can confess all your sins.  Which means you die forgiven and *also* go to heaven.

Religion is weird.

/Catholic
//first to admit religion can be really weird


He probably convinced himself that he is a martyr.  It must be really, really tough to have a martyr complex in  a just and tolerant society.
 
2013-05-21 04:36:17 PM  

K.B.O. Winston: ArgusRun: So an anti-marriage equality devout catholic kills himself in a cathedral in protest over France legalizing gay marriage.   I don't think anyone has ever failed more at reading comprehension.  Suicide is literally the only sin than cannot be forgiven.  NO confession, no penance.

The biggest knob gobbler in France has a better chance at dining at the left hand of Jesus that this douche.

It's such a no-no that in medieval times if someone wanted to kill themselves the preferred method was to drown a baby.  The thinking was, the baby has not yet committed any sins and will go straight to heaven and before the court/mob murders you they have to offer you a priest to whom you can confess all your sins.  Which means you die forgiven and *also* go to heaven.

Religion is weird.

/Catholic
//first to admit religion can be really weird


Are all babies truly without sin? Some babies are assholes.
 
2013-05-21 04:36:44 PM  

K.B.O. Winston: //first to admit religion can be really weird


Trust me...You are NOT the first...
 
2013-05-21 04:36:49 PM  

SmellsLikePoo: He sounds conflicted.   FTA:

"has lashed out against same-sex marriage"

AND?

"future Islamist takeover of France"

/I'm confused


Really?  Sounds just like a politician or preacher from Tennessee, South Carolina, or Kansas.  Those things go together likes peas in a pod.
 
2013-05-21 04:37:00 PM  

unchellmatt: There was a guy who had no arms, got a job ringing the bell at the cathedral. He couldn't pull the bell, so you know, he'd just head butt them.

One day, in order to impress the priests, he really went at it. Knocked himself out stone cold and fell from the tower. Someone asked the priest if he knew who the guy was. "I don't remember his name, but his face rings a bell."


The next day, the dead bell ringer's twin brother comes in for the again vacant bell ringer position. He also has no arms. They lead him up to the bell tower, he runs at the bell, trips and falls to the sidewalk below.

The same two guys walk by.

The first asks, "Do you know him?"

The second guy responds, "No, but he's a dead ringer for the guy we saw yesterday."
 
2013-05-21 04:38:11 PM  

Bashar and Asma's Infinite Playlist: Some babies are assholes.


Are you suggesting that some are NOT assholes?
 
2013-05-21 04:38:23 PM  
Nothing shows your respect for traditional marriage more than blowing your face off in a church full of children.
 
2013-05-21 04:38:38 PM  

ArgusRun: djZorbof: ArgusRun: So an anti-marriage equality devout catholic kills himself in a cathedral in protest over France legalizing gay marriage.   I don't think anyone has ever failed more at reading comprehension.  Suicide is literally the only sin than cannot be forgiven.  NO confession, no penance.

The biggest knob gobbler in France has a better chance at dining at the left hand of Jesus that this douche.

Not true. If you jumped from a high enough place, you could ask for forgiveness on the way down.

Hmmmm.... interesting theological question.  Is the sin in the intent or the resulting action.  Obviously someone who attempts suicide and lives can then confess and repent.  So if someone attempts suicide and then repents before they die are they forgiven?  Is the sin the end result of the successful suicide or the beginning of the attempt?


For this experiment you will need:

A priest
A rube goldberg suicide machine
A stopwatch
A very depressed theist
 
2013-05-21 04:38:39 PM  

unchellmatt: There was a guy who had no arms, got a job ringing the bell at the cathedral. He couldn't pull the bell, so you know, he'd just head butt them.

One day, in order to impress the priests, he really went at it. Knocked himself out stone cold and fell from the tower. Someone asked the priest if he knew who the guy was. "I don't remember his name, but his face rings a bell."



So then a few weeks later, his brother goes to the same cathedral.Same thing. Rings the bells beautifully, but in his enthusiasm, he hits the bells a little too hard and knocks himself out cold.Falls to his death.Two passersby: "Do you know him?" "No, but he's a dead ringer for that other guy."

/c&p from my wife
//Who probably c&p'ed from somewhere else
 
2013-05-21 04:39:15 PM  

scottydoesntknow: The next day, the dead bell ringer's twin brother comes in for the again vacant bell ringer position. He also has no arms. They lead him up to the bell tower, he runs at the bell, trips and falls to the sidewalk below.

The same two guys walk by.

The first asks, "Do you know him?"

The second guy responds, "No, but he's a dead ringer for the guy we saw yesterday."


*shakes fist*
 
2013-05-21 04:41:24 PM  
On his blog, Venner has lashed out against same-sex marriage and what he called a future Islamist takeover of France.

 Self correcting problem.
 
2013-05-21 04:42:17 PM  
scottydoesntknow:

NkThrasher:


I knew there was a reason I've been returning to Fark for far, far too many years.
 
2013-05-21 04:42:31 PM  
encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com
 
2013-05-21 04:46:10 PM  
Why so sad subby? The guy was an white supremacist christian asshole who shot himself because he opposed gay marriage.

/He cordially invites other rightwingers to join him in the glorious afterlife.
 
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