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(Newser)   A church gave out free $25 Chik-fil-A gift cards to straight married couples attending its "Day to Honor Biblical Marriage" event. So far, no gay couples are reported to have reconsidered their sexual preference at the prospect of free chicken   (newser.com) divider line 26
    More: Amusing, gift card, couples  
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2283 clicks; posted to Main » on 21 May 2013 at 12:13 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-05-21 12:45:08 AM  
3 votes:

Sgt Otter: So can I get a coupon if I drag in that attempted female suicide bomber we captured?

Deuteronomy 21:11-13

if you notice among the captives a beautiful woman and are attracted to her, you may take her as your wife. Bring her into your home and have her shave her head, trim her nails and put aside the clothes she was wearing when captured. After she has lived in your house and mourned her father and mother for a full month, then you may go to her and be her husband and she shall be your wife.


Well, CFA serves a lot of bacon, and pig meat is expressly forbidden by Leviticus.  11:17 or something, I don't care enough to look it up.

Again, it's the choose-your-own-adventure version of the bible.
2013-05-20 08:43:16 PM  
3 votes:
I hope "on the day to honor biblical marriage" they give an extra gift card for each wife.
2013-05-20 08:30:19 PM  
3 votes:
Not News:Lesbians reject free cock.
2013-05-21 02:20:44 AM  
2 votes:

Kurmudgeon: Biblical marriage? So that means the husbands showed up alone if their wives were menstruating?

Oh look, everyone is quoting the Old Testament out of context again, wow that's never happened here before.
Unless you have a problem with Jews, you're kind of missing the point.


Haha! You think the OT doesn't count. See, this here is the problem with trying to turn an old Jewish war god into a world-wide god of love: all the baggage you can't expunge from the previous religion now that everyone can read. You guys really should have made up a new supreme being from scratch.
2013-05-21 12:28:09 AM  
2 votes:
Step 1: Find one gay and one lesbian couple
Step 2: air off  Boy/girl
Step 3: Receive gift card
Step 4: Hot gay makeout session

/I'm not gay, but I'd french another chick for the lulz in this situation
//And then we'd eat some free chicken
2013-05-20 08:30:11 PM  
2 votes:
So can I get a coupon if I drag in that attempted female suicide bomber we captured?

Deuteronomy 21:11-13

if you notice among the captives a beautiful woman and are attracted to her, you may take her as your wife. Bring her into your home and have her shave her head, trim her nails and put aside the clothes she was wearing when captured. After she has lived in your house and mourned her father and mother for a full month, then you may go to her and be her husband and she shall be your wife.
2013-05-20 08:25:00 PM  
2 votes:
I have theory that all the chicken served at Chick-Fil-A are the poor birds that have been finally farked to death by Republicans.
2013-05-21 10:52:31 AM  
1 votes:

GORDON: Everyone loves being told what to do by people who know better, amirite?


So you buy the chicken from ardent supporters of the largest outfit who do that in human history? I guess you did hit every branch of the stupid tree when you fell out of it.

Your friend was inarticulate, as you point out. The Christian Taliban who run CFA are far worse than that.
2013-05-21 09:35:32 AM  
1 votes:
You know, you can make their sandwiches at home. All of the taste, none of the bigotry.
2013-05-21 09:10:33 AM  
1 votes:

Sgt Otter: Deuteronomy 21:11-13

if you notice among the captives a beautiful woman and are attracted to her, you may take her as your wife. Bring her into your home and have her shave her head, trim her nails and put aside the clothes she was wearing when captured. After she has lived in your house and mourned her father and mother for a full month, then you may go to her and be her husband and she shall be your wife.


That sounds extremely farking close to what that dude in Ohio did with those girls.  Considering Chick Fil-A explicitly says that they support "Biblical marriage", and the above quote unequivocally qualifies as a Biblical definition of marriage, then I'd have to assume that Chick-Fil-A fully supports what Ariel Castro did with his victims.
2013-05-21 05:08:06 AM  
1 votes:
A church in Dayton, Ohio gave out free $25 Chik-fil-A gift cards to straight married couples attending its "Day to Honor Biblical Marriage" event.

...
but it's the homosexuals who keep flaunting their relationships and their sexuality.  Why won't they just leave the poor heteros, who are obviously just trying to mind their own business, alone?
2013-05-21 04:23:10 AM  
1 votes:
I love my Dad and Mom.  That said, I'm fairly certain their marriage was one of convenience.  They were both nearly 30, my Mom was anxious, and my Dad grew up with an Old Dad himself and didn't want to have his own kids do the same.

Once we progress as a f--king society "gay marriage": will be no better or worse than "straight marriage" - pobody's nerfect - but having seen friends go through "commitment ceremonies" in Michigan (Where we have a f--king gay marriage ban) who then travel/move to Canada/a gay marriage legal state afterwards... yeah, they're better than us straights right now.  Because they have to go through so many f--king hoops just to know they can see the person they love in the ICU, for example.

HOWEVER, the tide is turning (took too damn long but better late than never y'know?)

I'll know we actually have marriage quality when married gay couples didn't have to navigate the web of Canadian residency/citizenship, don't have to work up crazy lawyer papers to make sure homophobic relatives don't get the last DNR call over a husband, didn't have to prove anything to the damn world, and - like my parents (who again, I do love) can just get married because their biological clocks are a-ticking and they want a family.  HELL, if I get to go to a commitment ceremony without a (completely justified) political tirade and get to go to a proper marriage ceremony without the preaching-to-the- choir ranting and raving... I''m happy.

Then, I will lay down my sword.  Which is really just my loud ass mouth and occasionally pen-to-paper and pen-to-checkbook.

I sincerely look forward to that day.
2013-05-21 04:15:19 AM  
1 votes:
bobcargill.files.wordpress.com
How about these "biblical marriages"?
2013-05-21 03:09:06 AM  
1 votes:

Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: Ed Grubermann: Kurmudgeon: Biblical marriage? So that means the husbands showed up alone if their wives were menstruating?

Oh look, everyone is quoting the Old Testament out of context again, wow that's never happened here before.
Unless you have a problem with Jews, you're kind of missing the point.

Haha! You think the OT doesn't count. See, this here is the problem with trying to turn an old Jewish war god into a world-wide god of love: all the baggage you can't expunge from the previous religion now that everyone can read. You guys really should have made up a new supreme being from scratch.

Exactly. See, the Jews are smart about it, they've managed to convince everyone that it's not a religion, it's an ethnicity, or a race. So anyone criticizing Judaism gets labelled a bigot or a racist.

But Christians, they picked a horrible prequel for their mythology, and they haven't figured out how to move away from the religion aspect of it yet.


That is because Christians are self absorbed, hate-filled, rascist, homophobic assholes. Did I state that concisely and strait forward enough for everyone? Don't want any ambiguity. Assholes. Period.
I know I had it forced on me for 18 years until I learned to think for myself.

/flame on.
2013-05-21 02:38:28 AM  
1 votes:

Kurmudgeon: Biblical marriage? So that means the husbands showed up alone if their wives were menstruating?

Oh look, everyone is quoting the Old Testament out of context again, wow that's never happened here before.
Unless you have a problem with Jews, you're kind of missing the point.


Biblical marriage would, technically, be any type of marriage found in the Bible.  Whether or not that's what any particular flavor of religion decides to follow is another matter.
2013-05-21 02:04:23 AM  
1 votes:

Kurmudgeon: Biblical marriage? So that means the husbands showed up alone if their wives were menstruating?

Oh look, everyone is quoting the Old Testament out of context again, wow that's never happened here before.
Unless you have a problem with Jews, you're kind of missing the point.


What possible context could there be where that passage isn't insane and horribly misogynistic?
2013-05-21 01:57:01 AM  
1 votes:
$25 is simply not enough to feed the wife and 9 concubines.
2013-05-21 01:25:25 AM  
1 votes:
Biblical Marriage day?  OOO, I hope none of those women who showed up had sex before marriage then.
2013-05-21 01:19:47 AM  
1 votes:

maxheck: I've had waffle fries with a coupon from CFA after I gave blood. at a Red Cross blood drive... They weren't bad at all, and it was nice of them to help out.

Their owner's stance is still dickish, but hey.no one is perfect short of God.


God's track record isn't that great.

See: The Recurrent Laryngeal Nerve, especially in giraffes.
2013-05-21 12:57:30 AM  
1 votes:

mrswood: moothemagiccow: Chick Fil A has some biatching new salads.

//got nothing

I just had a salad there the other day and it was fantastic. It didn't taste like hate at all!


That's because it's not tossed when they give it to you. They are very considerate to allow you to do it yourself.
2013-05-21 12:56:25 AM  
1 votes:
2013-05-21 12:47:33 AM  
1 votes:
I'd get it then give it as a wedding present to a gay couple.

Suck on that, Chik-fil-a
2013-05-21 12:42:35 AM  
1 votes:
Biblical marriage? So that means the husbands showed up alone if their wives were menstruating?


Leviticus 15:19-30English Standard Version (ESV)

19"When a woman has a discharge, and the discharge in her body is blood, she shall be in her menstrual impurity for seven days, and whoever touches her shall be unclean until the evening. 20And everything on which she lies during her menstrual impurity shall be unclean. Everything also on which she sits shall be unclean. 21And whoever touches her bed shall wash his clothes and bathe himself in water and be unclean until the evening. 22And whoever touches anything on which she sits shall wash his clothes and bathe himself in water and be unclean until the evening. 23Whether it is the bed or anything on which she sits, when he touches it he shall be unclean until the evening. 24And if any man lies with her and her menstrual impurity comes upon him, he shall be unclean seven days, and every bed on which he lies shall be unclean.
25"If a woman has a discharge of blood for many days, not at the time of her menstrual impurity, or if she has a discharge beyond the time of her impurity, all the days of the discharge she shall continue in uncleanness. As in the days of her impurity, she shall be unclean. 26Every bed on which she lies, all the days of her discharge, shall be to her as the bed of her impurity. And everything on which she sits shall be unclean, as in the uncleanness of her menstrual impurity. 27And whoever touches these things shall be unclean, and shall wash his clothes and bathe himself in water and be unclean until the evening. 28But if she is cleansed of her discharge, she shall count for herself seven days, and after that she shall be clean. 29And on the eighth day she shall take two turtledoves or two pigeons and bring them to the priest, to the entrance of the tent of meeting. 30And the priest shall use one for a sin offering and the other for a burnt offering. And the priest shall make atonement for her before the Lord for her unclean discharge.
2013-05-21 12:29:50 AM  
1 votes:

maxheck: I've had waffle fries with a coupon from CFA after I gave blood. at a Red Cross blood drive... They weren't bad at all, and it was nice of them to help out.

Their owner's stance is still dickish, but hey.no one is perfect short of God.


I've been reading the news. I actually think he is either criminally negligent or downright incompetent. Not so perfect.

/haven't seen his omelets yet but damn is he breaking some eggs
2013-05-21 12:28:44 AM  
1 votes:
I've never been married nor have I even seen a Chik-fil-A restaurant, so I have absolutely nothing to contribute to this thread.
2013-05-20 08:23:43 PM  
1 votes:
The I needed a screw part was related to HD not the attractive women at CFA.
 
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