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(The Raw Story)   Man sues after personal lubricant allegedly destroys his penis   (rawstory.com) divider line 23
    More: Sad, personal lubricant, Kama Sutra  
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13562 clicks; posted to Main » on 17 May 2013 at 5:42 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Archived thread
2013-05-17 05:27:05 PM
8 votes:
Link is to The Raw Story. Perfect.
2013-05-17 05:57:00 PM
5 votes:
cdn.ebaumsworld.com
2013-05-17 06:18:02 PM
2 votes:
"He removed the condom and his penis swelled significantly.

Those are called, "erections."
2013-05-17 06:13:22 PM
2 votes:

JesseL: Dr. Quasius: lockers: Why in the hell would you want to make your pud less sensitive?

Longevity, man, longevity.

What happened to thinking about baseball? If you can't feel it what's the point?


Wait wait wait...THAT's why you're supposed to think about baseball? I always though you were supposed to think about baseball because there's no crying in baseball.
2013-05-17 06:12:12 PM
2 votes:

StrikitRich: Does this mean you can change the oil in your car all by yourself?


With no hands
2013-05-17 05:56:07 PM
2 votes:

JesseL: Dr. Quasius: lockers: Why in the hell would you want to make your pud less sensitive?

Longevity, man, longevity.

What happened to thinking about baseball? If you can't feel it what's the point?


Margaret Thatcher nude on a cold day...Margaret Thatcher nude on a cold day...Margaret Thatcher nude on a cold day...
2013-05-17 05:53:51 PM
2 votes:
This story rubs me the wrong way.
2013-05-17 05:53:49 PM
2 votes:
I can't possibly be the only one who clicked just to make sure the offending lubricant isn't something that I use.
2013-05-18 12:11:20 PM
1 votes:

Walter Paisley: PaLarkin: First think Margaret Thatcher naked on a cold day.  if that doesn't work think Bea Arthur naked on a cold day.  If neither of these work, try the ultimate...

Hillary Clinton, Michelle Obama and Bea Arthur naked in a hot tub.

So it would kind of be like the cast of a 70's women in prison movie reenacting their bathing scenes in 2013? Which one would play the guard?


Helen Thomas.
2013-05-18 05:14:26 AM
1 votes:

Walter Paisley: HindiDiscoMonster: JesseL: Dr. Quasius: lockers: Why in the hell would you want to make your pud less sensitive?

Longevity, man, longevity.

What happened to thinking about baseball? If you can't feel it what's the point?

Margaret Thatcher nude on a cold day...Margaret Thatcher nude on a cold day...Margaret Thatcher nude on a cold day...


Sounds like someone's been a bad lad. A very bad lad.

/A word of caution: saying it three times will summon her.


You are a very very sick individual if that is your bag.I dont think Freud could help you.
2013-05-17 11:40:56 PM
1 votes:

rnatalie: Do you put your underwear on over your jeans too?


THat way they effectively hide my thunder.

25.media.tumblr.com
2013-05-17 10:48:35 PM
1 votes:
First think Margaret Thatcher naked on a cold day.  if that doesn't work think Bea Arthur naked on a cold day.  If neither of these work, try the ultimate...

Hillary Clinton, Michelle Obama and Bea Arthur naked in a hot tub.
2013-05-17 10:37:30 PM
1 votes:

digitalrain: lantawa: He probably also took Viagra or something like it, further adding to the blue balls.

On another note, a message to all you younger folk. Do not EVER put an acid-based antifungal or wart removing compound on your dick. Like Blistosol, for instance. Danger, Will Robinson! Don't do it....

I have an equivalent warning for all the younger Farkettes...bikini depilatories are for bikini area  ONLY...
NEVER use it to get rid of ALL the hair down there.

I wouldn't wish pain like that on my worst enemy. Felt like someone slapped a little white phosphorous
on the poor gal. The more I tried to rinse it off, the more it burned. Tears, pain, droplets of blood
welling out of the pores. A fun time was had by farking NO ONE.

Farking Nair.


We could crack up a co-worker for months just by saying one word to him, months after this joke made the rounds.

A woman has a show dog - a schnauzer - and wants to have a very short, even coat on it. She figures that 1 month before the dog show, she'll depilate the whole thing, and then it will grow back perfectly.  But she's reading the boxes at the drug store, and it says if it's going to be used on sensitive skin to dilute it half-and-half with water. 
She goes up to the pharmacist to get his advice, "I need to know if I should dilute this Nair or not." "Well, what are you going to do with it?". She replies "I'm putting it on my schnauzer."
The pharmacist frowns for a second, then says "Yeah, dilute it half-and-half, and don't ride a bicycle for a week."
2013-05-17 06:32:14 PM
1 votes:

Tom_Slick: BumpInTheNight: Tom_Slick: I used to work in the personal lube industry and I can tell you there is zero oversight. Anyone can create and sell their own lube.  This does not surprise me.

Your handle is hilariously apt :P

Sadly had the handle long before I slung lube for a living,

/Saturday Morning Cartoons FTW



So your penis is nicknamed the Thunderbolt Grease-Slapper?
2013-05-17 06:28:56 PM
1 votes:

rezaxis: I don't think this story is honest. More like dude uses this numbing stuff over and over without issue. That's all good. This time he gets an idea that includes soaking his weenus in the stuff by wearing a condom filled with it to get some extra numbing. Then he uses a penis pump, maybe for the first time, till he permanently maims himself because he doesn't feel the damage being done. Now what? Well, let's make lemonade!


He should have read this first:

2.bp.blogspot.com
2013-05-17 06:20:17 PM
1 votes:

HindiDiscoMonster: Margaret Thatcher nude on a cold day...Margaret Thatcher nude on a cold day...Margaret Thatcher nude on a cold day...


imgc.allpostersimages.com

Hmmm...
2013-05-17 06:14:20 PM
1 votes:
What a penis destroyer may look like.

media.mlive.com
2013-05-17 06:10:16 PM
1 votes:
Yeah, that's the ticket. Destroyed my penis, it did. Why, you should have seen it before. Magnificent! A foot if it was a centimeter, and straight as an arrow! Went off like a Howitzer! Of course it wasn't always like this, why do you ask?
2013-05-17 06:08:56 PM
1 votes:

gweilo8888: pyrotek85: During intercourse, the couple were interrupted. Lowe waited for his fiancée to return to bed, but experienced "excruciating pain and pressure in his penis," according to the suit.

Sounds like somebody just experienced blue balls for the first time.


It sounds like priapism, actually. I bet the guy waited in bed for over four hours before seeking medical attention. His wife probably went to the store for a thing or two.
2013-05-17 05:49:26 PM
1 votes:
Well, I guess it's back to butter..,
2013-05-17 05:47:51 PM
1 votes:

Astorix: For God's sake, man, what was the name of that lubricant?!



MethMemories®
2013-05-17 05:45:42 PM
1 votes:
www.rawstory.com

What a man with a destroyed penis might look like.
2013-05-17 05:44:54 PM
1 votes:
The swelling irreparably damaged the tissues of Lowe's penis and resulted in "permanent scarring and disfigurement of the penis, permanent loss of sensation in the penis, permanent loss of functioning of the penis, permanent nerve damage to the penis, permanent tissue damage to the penis, and the inability to ejaculate."


That may be the most frightening thing I have ever read.
 
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