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(The Raw Story)   Man sues after personal lubricant allegedly destroys his penis   (rawstory.com) divider line 124
    More: Sad, personal lubricant, Kama Sutra  
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13562 clicks; posted to Main » on 17 May 2013 at 5:42 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-05-17 10:26:54 PM
The lubricant contained an antibacterial agent.  Your penis was just a giant bacteria cell.  Clearly no-fault.
 
2013-05-17 10:37:30 PM

digitalrain: lantawa: He probably also took Viagra or something like it, further adding to the blue balls.

On another note, a message to all you younger folk. Do not EVER put an acid-based antifungal or wart removing compound on your dick. Like Blistosol, for instance. Danger, Will Robinson! Don't do it....

I have an equivalent warning for all the younger Farkettes...bikini depilatories are for bikini area  ONLY...
NEVER use it to get rid of ALL the hair down there.

I wouldn't wish pain like that on my worst enemy. Felt like someone slapped a little white phosphorous
on the poor gal. The more I tried to rinse it off, the more it burned. Tears, pain, droplets of blood
welling out of the pores. A fun time was had by farking NO ONE.

Farking Nair.


We could crack up a co-worker for months just by saying one word to him, months after this joke made the rounds.

A woman has a show dog - a schnauzer - and wants to have a very short, even coat on it. She figures that 1 month before the dog show, she'll depilate the whole thing, and then it will grow back perfectly.  But she's reading the boxes at the drug store, and it says if it's going to be used on sensitive skin to dilute it half-and-half with water. 
She goes up to the pharmacist to get his advice, "I need to know if I should dilute this Nair or not." "Well, what are you going to do with it?". She replies "I'm putting it on my schnauzer."
The pharmacist frowns for a second, then says "Yeah, dilute it half-and-half, and don't ride a bicycle for a week."
 
2013-05-17 10:41:56 PM

HindiDiscoMonster: Margaret Thatcher nude on a cold day...Margaret Thatcher nude on a cold day...Margaret Thatcher nude on a cold day...


shawglobalnews.files.wordpress.com

Bea Topless.
 
2013-05-17 10:42:52 PM

HartRend: Ok... nobody has laugh at the fact that this is being carried by "Raw Story"? :)


I laugh at practically everything posted on "Raw Story".
 
2013-05-17 10:48:02 PM

Walter Paisley: On a serious note, is it more likely that a higher percentage of American men are premature ejaculators or that American men are so insecure about their sexual performance that an industry was created to profit from them? It's a rather clever business model:
Step 1: Sell insecurity
Step 2: Sell a quick-fix "solution" to the insecure
Step 3: Profit


Well, premature ejaculation tends to be more of a problem with circumsized males, so that probably explains the difference between American men and most of the rest of the world.
 
2013-05-17 10:48:35 PM
First think Margaret Thatcher naked on a cold day.  if that doesn't work think Bea Arthur naked on a cold day.  If neither of these work, try the ultimate...

Hillary Clinton, Michelle Obama and Bea Arthur naked in a hot tub.
 
2013-05-17 11:24:44 PM

khyberkitsune: Having worked in a sex shop and sold this exact thing, I get a huge kick out of these replies.

And for the record, Kama Sutra product is garbage and over-priced.


^ this. A thousand times...this.

And if you want longevity dudes...buy a cock ring. And start playing around with some tease and denial. Or get some viagra (from your doctor, please. There's counterfeit drugs pretty much everywhere else). But I'll also tell you this, most women don't want you lasting longer than 20-30 minutes.

And if you need lube, I personally recommend WET (the gay man's fav lube) or astroglide. I've never needed lube myself (I get too wet), but I'm sure I will after menopause. You don't need to dress up the lube. You don't need to get lube that has flavors, or scents, or gets hot or cold. Sensation play is super fun, but you can easily do it with things that aren't unidentifiable chemicals that burn your dick off.

Though, for the record...I have made a bad subby put icy hot on his balls. /evilgrin
 
2013-05-17 11:28:23 PM

ScaryBottles: [www.rawstory.com image 615x345]

What a man with a destroyed penis might look like.


How YOU doin?
 
2013-05-17 11:37:09 PM

lockers: Why in the hell would you want to make your pud less sensitive?


K-Y Warming Jelly Personal Lubricant. Don't use it. It's like super glue and doesn't aid lubrication in any possible way.
 
2013-05-17 11:40:56 PM

rnatalie: Do you put your underwear on over your jeans too?


THat way they effectively hide my thunder.

25.media.tumblr.com
 
2013-05-18 12:11:53 AM

PaLarkin: First think Margaret Thatcher naked on a cold day.  if that doesn't work think Bea Arthur naked on a cold day.  If neither of these work, try the ultimate...

Hillary Clinton, Michelle Obama and Bea Arthur naked in a hot tub.


... And Tanning Mom?

spoiledpretty.com
 
2013-05-18 12:32:59 AM

AbbeySomeone: coconut oil is the best lube and non toxic or reactive.


And very dangerous for those with high cholesterol, as my boyfriend found out.

Lady Indica: And if you need lube, I personally recommend WET (the gay man's fav lube) or astroglide.


Wet. No astroglide, that's garbage, too. Wet platinum for your ass, Wet original for jacking it and vaginal.
 
2013-05-18 12:38:56 AM
While we are on the subject of lubes to avoid, add sesame oil to the list.
 
2013-05-18 12:52:35 AM

RealFarknMcCoy2: lockers: Why in the hell would you want to make your pud less sensitive?

LOTS of men (particularly American men) have problems with premature ejaculation.


I thought premature meant ... something else
 
2013-05-18 12:53:16 AM

PaLarkin: First think Margaret Thatcher naked on a cold day.  if that doesn't work think Bea Arthur naked on a cold day.  If neither of these work, try the ultimate...

Hillary Clinton, Michelle Obama and Bea Arthur naked in a hot tub.


So it would kind of be like the cast of a 70's women in prison movie reenacting their bathing scenes in 2013? Which one would play the guard?
 
2013-05-18 01:41:30 AM

Lady Indica: khyberkitsune: Having worked in a sex shop and sold this exact thing, I get a huge kick out of these replies.

And for the record, Kama Sutra product is garbage and over-priced.

^ this. A thousand times...this.

And if you want longevity dudes...buy a cock ring. And start playing around with some tease and denial. Or get some viagra (from your doctor, please. There's counterfeit drugs pretty much everywhere else). But I'll also tell you this, most women don't want you lasting longer than 20-30 minutes.

And if you need lube, I personally recommend WET (the gay man's fav lube) or astroglide. I've never needed lube myself (I get too wet), but I'm sure I will after menopause. You don't need to dress up the lube. You don't need to get lube that has flavors, or scents, or gets hot or cold. Sensation play is super fun, but you can easily do it with things that aren't unidentifiable chemicals that burn your dick off.

Though, for the record...I have made a bad subby put icy hot on his balls. /evilgrin


Go onnnn
 
2013-05-18 02:35:34 AM

Lady Indica: Though, for the record...I have made a bad subby put icy hot on his balls. /evilgrin


Which is why I would never be the submissive.

also call me! please!
 
2013-05-18 03:49:12 AM

Walter Paisley: PaLarkin: First think Margaret Thatcher naked on a cold day.  if that doesn't work think Bea Arthur naked on a cold day.  If neither of these work, try the ultimate...

Hillary Clinton, Michelle Obama and Bea Arthur naked in a hot tub.

So it would kind of be like the cast of a 70's women in prison movie reenacting their bathing scenes in 2013? Which one would play the guard?


Hillary should play vinegar tits.
 
2013-05-18 05:14:26 AM

Walter Paisley: HindiDiscoMonster: JesseL: Dr. Quasius: lockers: Why in the hell would you want to make your pud less sensitive?

Longevity, man, longevity.

What happened to thinking about baseball? If you can't feel it what's the point?

Margaret Thatcher nude on a cold day...Margaret Thatcher nude on a cold day...Margaret Thatcher nude on a cold day...


Sounds like someone's been a bad lad. A very bad lad.

/A word of caution: saying it three times will summon her.


You are a very very sick individual if that is your bag.I dont think Freud could help you.
 
2013-05-18 08:38:28 AM
upload.wikimedia.org
He was having premarital sex.  God is punishing him.  It's not the lube.
 
2013-05-18 09:20:19 AM

RealFarknMcCoy2: Well, premature ejaculation tends to be more of a problem with circumsized males, so that probably explains the difference between American men and most of the rest of the world.


I don't see how that is a problem. It's like saying premature dessert or premature Christmas presents is a problem.

/Got other things to do.
 
2013-05-18 12:11:20 PM

Walter Paisley: PaLarkin: First think Margaret Thatcher naked on a cold day.  if that doesn't work think Bea Arthur naked on a cold day.  If neither of these work, try the ultimate...

Hillary Clinton, Michelle Obama and Bea Arthur naked in a hot tub.

So it would kind of be like the cast of a 70's women in prison movie reenacting their bathing scenes in 2013? Which one would play the guard?


Helen Thomas.
 
2013-05-18 12:13:03 PM

gja: uncleacid: What a penis destroyer may look like.

[media.mlive.com image 380x249]

FTFY

[encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com image 259x194]

i.imgur.com
 
gja [TotalFark]
2013-05-18 05:16:40 PM

wambu: gja: uncleacid: What a penis destroyer may look like.

[media.mlive.com image 380x249]

FTFY

[encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com image 259x194]
[i.imgur.com image 468x734]


AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH.....

I need many, many , MANY drinks to get that out of my mind.
 
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