Do you have adblock enabled?
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Denver Channel)   After a night of drinking, woman successfully shows how her brand new assault rifle works. Since you're reading this on Fark, you can predict what happened   ( thedenverchannel.com) divider line
    More: Dumbass, assault rifles, Denver Health  
•       •       •

11109 clicks; posted to Main » on 17 May 2013 at 1:29 AM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



260 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | » | Newest | Show all

 
2013-05-17 01:55:49 AM  

cameroncrazy1984: Must've been pre-1996. Since then gun ownership in Australia has dropped to around 5%.


That makes it a must've? You've never hit a 2-outer on the river?
 
2013-05-17 01:56:27 AM  
Live by the DERP, Die by the DERP.
 
2013-05-17 01:56:38 AM  

awalkingecho: cameroncrazy1984: Must've been pre-1996. Since then gun ownership in Australia has dropped to around 5%.

That makes it a must've? You've never hit a 2-outer on the river?


Let's just say I knew my odds
 
2013-05-17 01:56:58 AM  

sethen320: Is this really that difficult?


cc86 is among the largest fountains of derp on the website. Surely you know that by now.
 
2013-05-17 01:57:23 AM  

sethen320: No. I still haven't feared being shot in the U.S.

Is this really that difficult?


Yes. I'm wondering why you even brought up the Australian thing. Were you afraid of being shot in Australia pre gun-ban? Would you be afraid of being shot there now?
 
2013-05-17 01:57:49 AM  

awalkingecho: sethen320: Is this really that difficult?

cc84 is among the largest fountains of derp on the website. Surely you know that by now.


FTFM
 
2013-05-17 01:57:58 AM  

awalkingecho: sethen320: Is this really that difficult?

cc86 is among the largest fountains of derp on the website. Surely you know that by now.


Coming from you, that's a great compliment. You really know your derp!
 
2013-05-17 01:58:18 AM  
The type of gun is irrelevant. Any gun with the safety off and a round in the chamber will go off if the trigger is pulled. Same old worthless argument.

/gun should have been stored safely. Should not have been handled by drunk people with a round in the chamber AND the safety off.

/RIP young lady and condolences to husband, family and friends.
 
2013-05-17 01:59:52 AM  

sethen320: I do now.


That's not to say he's not a great guy, of course. Gun threads and middle east threads are always a hoot though.
 
2013-05-17 02:00:26 AM  

sethen320: cameroncrazy1984: sethen320: cameroncrazy1984: sethen320: Incidentally I dif have a gun pulled on me once when I was younger.
It scared the hell out of me. I lived in Cronulla...as in Australia. Only time that has ever happened to me.

Must've been pre-1996. Since then gun ownership in Australia has dropped to around 5%.

Full disclosure: yes, pre 1996.

So then your anecdote actually discredits your position.

Ah..I think we had a misunderstanding...
I didn't live there past 1990 so I wouldn't know anything of 1996+.


Let me bring you up to speed:

Australia used to have a gun violence problem.
Mass shooting happens in 1996.
They ban a bunch of different types of guns.
They've had 1 in the intervening 17 years.

US has a number of mass shootings in the 2000s
We don't do anything
We continue to have mass shootings at a rate of several per year.

Do you understand this now? Does it make sense to you now?
 
2013-05-17 02:00:36 AM  
Am I the only one that finds the eyewitness stories less than credible?
 
2013-05-17 02:00:53 AM  

squibbits: The type of gun is irrelevant. Any gun with the safety off and a round in the chamber will go off if the trigger is pulled. Same old worthless argument.

/gun should have been stored safely. Should not have been handled by drunk people with a round in the chamber AND the safety off.

/RIP young lady and condolences to husband, family and friends.


also not handled by drunks
also shouldn't be loaded
also what was she doing handing it by the barrel pointing at her face?
 
2013-05-17 02:01:01 AM  

sethen320: cameroncrazy1984: sethen320: cameroncrazy1984: sethen320: cameroncrazy1984: What you're saying,  sethen320, is that we aren't as good as the UK. That it's just too hard to be exceptional. Is that what you really believe? That the US cannot be better than every other country in the developed world?

Um sure. Whatever works for you.

That's what I thought. You're so in love with your guns that you just don't want to expend the effort to make America truly exceptional in the world.

Yes. You have me figured out completely. You must be psychic.

Well you're not exactly hard to read, pookie.

Your sarcasm meter is broken.


Oh no, I understood the sarcasm completely.
 
2013-05-17 02:01:13 AM  
That sucks. I wish more people would take a simple firearms safety course before they decide to bring a gun into the home.
 
2013-05-17 02:01:29 AM  

cameroncrazy1984: We continue to have mass shootings at a rate of several per year.


The beauty of ours is, provided that we utilize our rights correctly, we can actually shoot back!
 
2013-05-17 02:02:26 AM  

awalkingecho: cameroncrazy1984: We continue to have mass shootings at a rate of several per year.

The beauty of ours is, provided that we utilize our rights correctly, we can actually shoot back!


Which happens approximately zero times.

Some beauty.
 
2013-05-17 02:03:45 AM  

sethen320: Actually I don't care. Still feel pretty safe right where I am. Fark off.


Yes, you don't care so much that you said "fark off" when the differences between Australia and the US were pointed out to you.

I feel very safe where I am as well. And yet, somehow, i don't feel the need to strap up every day.
 
2013-05-17 02:04:22 AM  
I assumed AR-15 stood for assault rifle. Am i mistaken?
 
2013-05-17 02:04:42 AM  

cameroncrazy1984: sethen320: Actually I don't care. Still feel pretty safe right where I am. Fark off.

Yes, you don't care so much that you said "fark off" when the differences between Australia and the US were pointed out to you.

I feel very safe where I am as well. And yet, somehow, i don't feel the need to strap up every day.


And where you are is the US, just like the rest of us, so you are... invalidating your own argument?

Or am I missing something here.
 
2013-05-17 02:05:04 AM  

kibbled: I assumed AR-15 stood for assault rifle. Am i mistaken?


Armalite Rifle I think. Something like that.
 
2013-05-17 02:05:29 AM  
If assault weapons were banned, she would have been restricted to a rifle without a pistol grip or collapsing stock, a bullet from which would have been substantially less lethal.
 
2013-05-17 02:05:38 AM  

kibbled: I assumed AR-15 stood for assault rifle. Am i mistaken?


That is correct. AK-47, as mentioned in the article, stands for Attack Killer.
 
2013-05-17 02:06:44 AM  

sethen320: cameroncrazy1984: sethen320: Actually I don't care. Still feel pretty safe right where I am. Fark off.

Yes, you don't care so much that you said "fark off" when the differences between Australia and the US were pointed out to you.

I feel very safe where I am as well. And yet, somehow, i don't feel the need to strap up every day.

Neither do I. I like your judgemental douchebag approach though. Ill bet you get lots of converts like that.


Nah, I only take that approach with people who are clearly idiots. Oddly seems to happen a lot with gun nuts.
 
2013-05-17 02:07:31 AM  

cameroncrazy1984: Nah, I only take that approach with people who are clearly idiots. Oddly seems to happen a lot with gun nuts


This is amusing because I don't think any of the people you are carrying on this conversation with are gun nuts.
 
2013-05-17 02:08:34 AM  

awalkingecho: cameroncrazy1984: Nah, I only take that approach with people who are clearly idiots. Oddly seems to happen a lot with gun nuts

This is amusing because I don't think any of the people you are carrying on this conversation with are gun nuts.


I stand corrected. He must have just been uninformed. My mistake.
 
2013-05-17 02:08:34 AM  

awalkingecho: cameroncrazy1984: Nah, I only take that approach with people who are clearly idiots. Oddly seems to happen a lot with gun nuts

This is amusing because I don't think any of the people you are carrying on this conversation with are gun nuts.


Anyone who doesn't shiat their pants at the thought of an adult owning a firearm is a "gun nut."
 
2013-05-17 02:09:09 AM  

Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: awalkingecho: cameroncrazy1984: Nah, I only take that approach with people who are clearly idiots. Oddly seems to happen a lot with gun nuts

This is amusing because I don't think any of the people you are carrying on this conversation with are gun nuts.

Anyone who doesn't shiat their pants at the thought of an adult owning a firearm is a "gun nut."


Not sure if serious.
 
2013-05-17 02:10:22 AM  

NewportBarGuy: There is no such thing as an assault rifle.




Next you will be telling me this doesn't exist.
upload.wikimedia.org

/Tortious negligence at least
 
2013-05-17 02:11:07 AM  

kibbled: I assumed AR-15 stood for assault rifle. Am i mistaken?


Armalite Rifle.
 
2013-05-17 02:11:31 AM  

sethen320: It might even help with your phobia of getting shot.


What phobia of getting shot? I gave you numbers. That's called evidence-based reasoning.
 
2013-05-17 02:12:39 AM  

cameroncrazy1984: sethen320: It might even help with your phobia of getting shot.

What phobia of getting shot? I gave you numbers. That's called evidence-based reasoning.


Are you implying that correlation is causation?
 
2013-05-17 02:12:49 AM  

Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: kibbled: I assumed AR-15 stood for assault rifle. Am i mistaken?

That is correct. AK-47, as mentioned in the article, stands for Attack Killer.


There was a trolling comment in an earlier gun thread today that cracked me up.


"The AK-47 and AR-15 are Assault Rifles as designated by their manufacturers. Of course we all know "AR" stands for "Assault Rifle", but "AK" stands for "Assaulti Karabina", which is Russian for, you guessed it, "Assault Rifle." These were purpose-built for being fully machine gun automatic weapons for infantrymen to kill as many enemy as possible.

The numbers indicated the size of their ammo magazines but there have been aftermarket magazines developed which will hold 30 or 100 rounds, and even a backpack that will hold 1000 rounds."
 
2013-05-17 02:12:57 AM  
I am late to this wonderful outpouring of constructive discussion. I just drank half a fifth of Tito's vodka in 5 minutes and am now starting to read from the very top. "Let's see how long he lasts Jim"
 
2013-05-17 02:13:45 AM  

awalkingecho: cameroncrazy1984: sethen320: It might even help with your phobia of getting shot.

What phobia of getting shot? I gave you numbers. That's called evidence-based reasoning.

Are you implying that correlation is causation?


No, it's clearly unrelated that after a massive gun-control law was passed in 1996 all gun-related violence went down sharply in Australia.
 
2013-05-17 02:13:49 AM  

berylman: I am late to this wonderful outpouring of constructive discussion. I just drank half a fifth of Tito's vodka in 5 minutes and am now starting to read from the very top. "Let's see how long he lasts Jim"


Turn back, here there be dragons.
 
2013-05-17 02:14:14 AM  
Isolated incident.

Just like the last 10 times this happened this week.
 
2013-05-17 02:15:01 AM  

violentsalvation: That sucks. I wish more people would take a simple firearms safety course before they decide to bring a gun into the home.


It's required they take one to get a license, isn't it?

I think the problem is more about people thinking guns are cool and fun, which leads to people not taking them as seriously as they should. They're just tools. The guns, that is.
 
2013-05-17 02:15:06 AM  

The All-Powerful Atheismo: Isolated incident.

Just like the last 10 times this happened this week.


Oh no, I've been told that there's no such thing as an assault rifle. It couldn't have happened at all.
 
2013-05-17 02:15:56 AM  

violentsalvation: Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: kibbled: I assumed AR-15 stood for assault rifle. Am i mistaken?

That is correct. AK-47, as mentioned in the article, stands for Attack Killer.

There was a trolling comment in an earlier gun thread today that cracked me up.


"The AK-47 and AR-15 are Assault Rifles as designated by their manufacturers. Of course we all know "AR" stands for "Assault Rifle", but "AK" stands for "Assaulti Karabina", which is Russian for, you guessed it, "Assault Rifle." These were purpose-built for being fully machine gun automatic weapons for infantrymen to kill as many enemy as possible.

The numbers indicated the size of their ammo magazines but there have been aftermarket magazines developed which will hold 30 or 100 rounds, and even a backpack that will hold 1000 rounds."


Ha, that's good
 
2013-05-17 02:16:04 AM  

J. Frank Parnell: I think the problem is more about people thinking guns are cool and fun, which leads to people not taking them as seriously as they should. They're just tools. The guns, that is.


That is definitely a large component to the problem for sure. I think I saw something that said accidental deaths from firearms are one of the leading causes of gun deaths. I could be mistaken though.
 
2013-05-17 02:16:51 AM  
I met some kindly timelords decoying as ambient walruses who informed me of the futility of this thread so yeah I took their giant semi-ambulatory advice. Did I ever tell you that walruses can't get around on land to well? ...because its a damn shame they could rule the world with their giant tusks and corpuscular bodies if it wasn't for the ....
 
2013-05-17 02:17:14 AM  
At common law it's only an assault rifle up until it shoots someone. Then it's a battery rifle
 
2013-05-17 02:18:20 AM  

berylman: I met some kindly timelords decoying as ambient walruses who informed me of the futility of this thread so yeah I took their giant semi-ambulatory advice. Did I ever tell you that walruses can't get around on land to well? ...because its a damn shame they could rule the world with their giant tusks and corpuscular bodies if it wasn't for the ....


AR-15s killing off the hot fertile females?
 
2013-05-17 02:18:26 AM  
i1048.photobucket.com
 
2013-05-17 02:18:56 AM  

rosebud_the_sled: I may be stating the obvious, but if there had been someone else in the area who was armed, that never would have happened.  After all, it is absolute truth that the only way to stop someone with a weapon is someone else with a weapon.


DERPA-DERPA-DERP!! Still funny and relevant after 18373828 times.
 
2013-05-17 02:20:38 AM  
No really I am great I just want to make sure that Shamu the baby whale is doing fine also. Tell her mother the checks are on the way.
 
2013-05-17 02:21:03 AM  
mtylerjr.smallbizdepot.com
 
2013-05-17 02:21:09 AM  
Ida banged her.
but someone already did.
Sadly her name ain't ethyl
now I can't do her the cold way
Alice Cooper woulda could.
 
2013-05-17 02:21:18 AM  

armor helix: rosebud_the_sled: I may be stating the obvious, but if there had been someone else in the area who was armed, that never would have happened.  After all, it is absolute truth that the only way to stop someone with a weapon is someone else with a weapon.

DERPA-DERPA-DERP!! Still funny and relevant after 18373828 times.


Well hey, isn't that what Wayne LaPierre said? Is he not correct?
 
2013-05-17 02:22:29 AM  

cameroncrazy1984: armor helix: rosebud_the_sled: I may be stating the obvious, but if there had been someone else in the area who was armed, that never would have happened.  After all, it is absolute truth that the only way to stop someone with a weapon is someone else with a weapon.

DERPA-DERPA-DERP!! Still funny and relevant after 18373828 times.

Well hey, isn't that what Wayne LaPierre said? Is he not correct?


The fat guy from Seinfeld? Wtf
 
Displayed 50 of 260 comments


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | » | Newest | Show all


View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking

On Twitter





Top Commented
Javascript is required to view headlines in widget.
  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report