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(UPI)   Woman accused of using weapon of mass salvation   (upi.com) divider line 36
    More: Amusing, woman accused, Bibles  
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6699 clicks; posted to Main » on 16 May 2013 at 1:19 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-05-16 01:24:53 AM
Ol' timey religion, y'all
 
2013-05-16 01:26:45 AM
Whatcha say Big Dan?

The Word Of God in bulk is a powerful tool!

/
 
2013-05-16 01:26:53 AM
Sticks and stones may break my bones
but words will never hurt me
 
2013-05-16 01:30:07 AM
I hope the judge throws the book at her.
 
2013-05-16 01:30:35 AM
Sometimes I am glad I live in North Carolina. Right now is not one of those times.
 
2013-05-16 01:32:25 AM
Word
 
2013-05-16 01:38:33 AM
Conservative "Christians" (it's impossible to be conservative and a real Christian), love to use Christianity to absolve themselves of any wrongdoing, while zealously pointing out the wrongdoing of others.  Essentially, conservative "Christians" are modern equivalent of the Pharisees Jesus verbally sparred against.
 
2013-05-16 01:40:15 AM

pion: Conservative "Christians" (it's impossible to be conservative and a real Christian), love to use Christianity to absolve themselves of any wrongdoing, while zealously pointing out the wrongdoing of others.  Essentially, conservative "Christians" are modern equivalent of the Pharisees Jesus verbally sparred against.


Hope you've got some high strength line on that hook.
 
2013-05-16 01:40:56 AM
she's taking bible thumping literally
 
2013-05-16 01:46:46 AM
Time to outlaw those tactical assault Bibles...
 
2013-05-16 01:48:16 AM

Shadow Blasko: pion: Conservative "Christians" (it's impossible to be conservative and a real Christian), love to use Christianity to absolve themselves of any wrongdoing, while zealously pointing out the wrongdoing of others.  Essentially, conservative "Christians" are modern equivalent of the Pharisees Jesus verbally sparred against.

Hope you've got some high strength line on that hook.


I absolutely believe that what I said is true, though I would love for an example of conservative Christians proving me wrong.  However, it baffles me how Republicans can claim abortion is murder, and at the same time cut funding for food stamps, all the while claiming to be "Christian."
 
2013-05-16 01:50:30 AM

pion: I absolutely believe that what I said is true, though I would love for an example of conservative Christians proving me wrong. However, it baffles me how Republicans can claim abortion is murder, and at the same time cut funding for food stamps, all the while claiming to be "Christian."


The meek are already blessed by God. Why do they need government assistance?
 
2013-05-16 01:52:45 AM
Baptists... lol.
 
2013-05-16 01:54:26 AM
Usually, Christians only figuratively beat you over the head with their stupid book.
 
2013-05-16 01:56:06 AM
Now is not the time to talk about Bible control.
 
2013-05-16 01:57:49 AM

pion: Conservative "Christians" (it's impossible to be conservative and a real Christian), love to use Christianity to absolve themselves of any wrongdoing, while zealously pointing out the wrongdoing of others.  Essentially, conservative "Christians" are modern equivalent of the Pharisees Jesus verbally sparred against.


The word of Supply Side Jesus Christ, our Lord...
 
2013-05-16 01:58:53 AM
So when did that memo go out requiring 75% of comments in all Fark threads to be bad gun puns?
 
2013-05-16 02:06:30 AM
oi43.tinypic.com
 
2013-05-16 02:07:38 AM
2.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-05-16 02:08:51 AM

Bucky Katt: she's taking bible thumping literally


She's the first bible thwumper.
 
2013-05-16 02:13:50 AM
I read the headline as "salivation", and was hoping for another boobies thread.
 
2013-05-16 02:24:07 AM

Prof. Frink: I read the headline as "salivation", and was hoping for another boobies thread.


Heh, I hate to say but I did as well. The bible bashing sorta caught me off guard.
 
2013-05-16 02:29:24 AM

pion: Conservative "Christians" (it's impossible to be conservative and a real Christian), love to use Christianity to absolve themselves of any wrongdoing, while zealously pointing out the wrongdoing of others.  Essentially, conservative "Christians" are modern equivalent of the Pharisees Jesus verbally sparred against.


The Pharisees were actually reformers*; the Sadducees were the conservative farkwits.  The reason the Bible lays into them so hard is that they were the chief alternative to early Christians in the first century.  Anyone who was considered a stick-in-the-mud was gonna go Sadducee, so you could care less, because they were not going to join anyway - but more liberal Jews could go Christian or Pharisee, so you needed to slag them hardcore to make yourself the attractive option.  Think of the Democrat-Naderite wars of the 2000s; the Birchirite Republicans were basically ignored, while the two liberal factions decided that each was the most evil beings ever to touch foot on this mortal plane.  Having Jesus always go mano-a-mano with a Pharisee was the equivalent of Greenpeace framing the Sierra Club for 9-11


*Virtually all modern Jews are philosophical/spiritual descendants of the Pharisees, so we are talking about a group flexible and liberal enough to look at the gutted Second Temple and go "ehh, it was a silly place anyway"
 
2013-05-16 02:54:08 AM

phalamir: pion: Conservative "Christians" (it's impossible to be conservative and a real Christian), love to use Christianity to absolve themselves of any wrongdoing, while zealously pointing out the wrongdoing of others.  Essentially, conservative "Christians" are modern equivalent of the Pharisees Jesus verbally sparred against.

The Pharisees were actually reformers*; the Sadducees were the conservative farkwits.  The reason the Bible lays into them so hard is that they were the chief alternative to early Christians in the first century.  Anyone who was considered a stick-in-the-mud was gonna go Sadducee, so you could care less, because they were not going to join anyway - but more liberal Jews could go Christian or Pharisee, so you needed to slag them hardcore to make yourself the attractive option.  Think of the Democrat-Naderite wars of the 2000s; the Birchirite Republicans were basically ignored, while the two liberal factions decided that each was the most evil beings ever to touch foot on this mortal plane.  Having Jesus always go mano-a-mano with a Pharisee was the equivalent of Greenpeace framing the Sierra Club for 9-11


*Virtually all modern Jews are philosophical/spiritual descendants of the Pharisees, so we are talking about a group flexible and liberal enough to look at the gutted Second Temple and go "ehh, it was a silly place anyway"


themoreyouknow.jpg
 
2013-05-16 03:26:36 AM
Police in North Carolina said they arrested a woman whose alleged Bible-thumping left a woman with bruises and abrasions.

Dammit, the article ruined the best jokes this thread could have done.
 
2013-05-16 03:44:07 AM

Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: So when did that memo go out requiring 75% of comments in all Fark threads to be bad gun puns?


That's funny, I thought you'd been around here a lot longer than FOUR FREAKING YEARS.
 
2013-05-16 03:57:08 AM

Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: So when did that memo go out requiring 75% of comments in all Fark threads to be bad gun puns?


I chalk it up to all the gun rights/shooting threads lately. Yeah, it's always been around somewhat but the recent spate is probably due to post-traumatic gun thread syndrome.
 
2013-05-16 05:09:33 AM
I feel old, I remember when Grady Nut used this as a joke for Southern Baptist preachers.

/You take that 17 pound Bible, and you HUMBLE that dog!
//Gotta give him a minute: the Word never hit him this way before
 
2013-05-16 05:20:51 AM

hundreddollarman: Now is not the time to talk about Bible control.




Your type is always trying to pull this cowardly tactic. It's glarringly obvious to even the most uneducated that a realistic solution to bible control is in order. It's only a matter of time until another maniac goes on a rampage with such a weapon of mass destruction. The founding fathers had no idea how available these cheap Saturday night special bibles would be.

The child you save may be your own.
 
2013-05-16 06:59:07 AM
See!? Obama IS persecuting Christians!
 
2013-05-16 07:32:14 AM
What a weapon of mass salvation may look like:

i27.photobucket.com
 
2013-05-16 08:19:15 AM

Mega Steve: Ol' timey religion, y'all


It was good for Aphrodite
'Though she was sometimes flighty
She never wore a nighty
And she's good enough for me!
 
2013-05-16 08:53:02 AM
For some reason I was reading, salivation
 
2013-05-16 09:19:37 AM

Bucky Katt: she's taking bible thumping literally


A lot of folks down in those parts do take Bible thumping literally.  I have actually heard a preacher say 'if you can't get the Bible through their thick skull, hit 'em with it'.  I am really surprised this is the first time we ever had a story like this.

/Christian
//read it, don't thump it
 
2013-05-16 09:24:07 AM

pion: Shadow Blasko: pion: Conservative "Christians" (it's impossible to be conservative and a real Christian), love to use Christianity to absolve themselves of any wrongdoing, while zealously pointing out the wrongdoing of others.  Essentially, conservative "Christians" are modern equivalent of the Pharisees Jesus verbally sparred against.

Hope you've got some high strength line on that hook.

I absolutely believe that what I said is true, though I would love for an example of conservative Christians proving me wrong.  However, it baffles me how Republicans can claim abortion is murder, and at the same time cut funding for food stamps, all the while claiming to be "Christian."


There's your issue. Not all conservatives are republicans. There are a lot of fiscal conservatives who are socially liberal. And then there's the crowd that looks at Obama and the GOP and doesn't really see much that's "liberal" about either of them.
 
2013-05-17 08:01:15 AM
Is this known as throwing the good book at her?
 
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