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(Match.com)   The 5 types of women every guy should date before settling down   (yahoo.match.com) divider line 195
    More: Obvious, Jonathan Small, type-token distinction  
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24289 clicks; posted to Main » on 15 May 2013 at 12:43 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-05-15 12:44:33 PM
6) Daddy Issues
 
2013-05-15 12:44:49 PM
dumbest article ever.
 
2013-05-15 12:45:31 PM
What about:

6. The actual woman

I'm sure you Farkers are with me on this one!
 
2013-05-15 12:45:52 PM
6. A mute.
 
2013-05-15 12:45:52 PM
Yeah, cuz finding women to date is so easy we can just get picky. I know a few guys who married the first woman they dated. Any port in a storm and all that.
 
2013-05-15 12:46:03 PM
I didn't see "slut" on that list, so I'm calling BS.
 
2013-05-15 12:46:15 PM
Been there, done those.
 
2013-05-15 12:46:30 PM
cdn2.mamapop.com
I thought we had this thread yesterday...
 
2013-05-15 12:47:45 PM
Like 99% of all internet "advice", this exists solely for the sake of the author wanting to sound like an expert. It is not meant to be helpful in any way.
 
2013-05-15 12:47:47 PM
That would require finding and dating 5 women. Finding 1 is hard enough
 
2013-05-15 12:47:58 PM
Slut
Slut
Slut
Tramp
Nypho

And if you're subby, mom
 
2013-05-15 12:48:30 PM
1. Black
2. Redhead
3. Asian
4. Latina
5. Swedish/Norwegian/Icelandic
6. Jewish
 
2013-05-15 12:48:48 PM

Quantum Apostrophe: Yeah, cuz finding women to date is so easy we can just get picky. I know a few guys who married the first woman they dated. Any port in a storm and all that.


That describes ALL of my friends. They actually chose very well though.
 
2013-05-15 12:49:31 PM
Three-feet tall (blowjob height), flat head (to set your beer), no teeth (this one is obvious), mute (so is this one), Romanian gymnast, millionaire who owns a chain of liquor stores?
 
2013-05-15 12:49:56 PM
i.imgur.com
 
2013-05-15 12:51:18 PM

Theaetetus: [cdn2.mamapop.com image 584x397]
I thought we had this thread yesterday...


I'd totally take Rainbow Brite there out on a date.
 
2013-05-15 12:52:13 PM
I think there are some traits that are so toxic to long term happiness, that you should date them at least once so you can spot them a mile away and avoid forever.

1) The abuser
2) The weakling
3) The addict
4) The insatiable (not in the good way)

and most importantly

5) The girl who is incapable of amusing herself for any length of time (so important it deserves a longer title)
 
2013-05-15 12:52:18 PM
Wives get mad when you date a seductress.
 
2013-05-15 12:52:52 PM
What a shiatty article.

Basically it says, "If you're one of these types of women, you'll never have a meaningful long term relationship, because fark you."
 
2013-05-15 12:53:01 PM
To summarize in case you don't want to read the article:

1.  Subby's mom
2.  Your friend Steve
3.  Insane and off meds
4.  The one with the good personality
5.  Subby's mom again
 
2013-05-15 12:54:27 PM
Is it still considered a "date" if chloroform is involved?
 
2013-05-15 12:55:09 PM

ranold: 6. A mute.


BEFORE settling down.

WTF Indeed: 6) Daddy Issues


Oh hell yes.  Get yourself some Old Spice.
 
2013-05-15 12:57:03 PM
But that would require finding five girls willing to date me.
 
2013-05-15 12:57:11 PM

Sin_City_Superhero: Three-feet tall (blowjob height), flat head (to set your beer), no teeth (this one is obvious), mute (so is this one), Romanian gymnast, millionaire who owns a chain of liquor stores?


She better driver me around in her Caddilac
 
2013-05-15 12:58:00 PM

Magnanimous_J: 5) The girl who is incapable of amusing herself for any length of time (so important it deserves a longer title)


"Toxic" is not nearly a strong enough word. I've dated women like this. I still wake up some nights screaming. And not in a good way.
 
2013-05-15 12:58:03 PM

Quantum Apostrophe: Yeah, cuz finding women to date is so easy we can just get picky. I know a few guys who married the first woman they dated. Any port in a storm and all that.


That may be the saddest thing I've ever heard.
 
2013-05-15 12:58:14 PM
Despite the byline, that article was not written by a guy.
 
2013-05-15 12:59:18 PM

Lemmy Kilmister: dumbest article ever.


Yeah for you. Only 5 is like a Tuesday afternoon for you.
 
2013-05-15 01:00:35 PM
It's almost like they write articles these days to go with the advertisements.
 
2013-05-15 01:01:40 PM
The Hot and Crazy.  You will do things that you will look back on with regret, shame, horror, and affectionate nostalgia.  And they'll be the same things.  Good luck not getting stabbed, though.
 
2013-05-15 01:02:13 PM
So.... crazy biatch wasn't on the list?


Because I've dated quite a few of those....
 
2013-05-15 01:02:20 PM
At least they disclose who's writing teh stoopid for them
 
2013-05-15 01:02:50 PM
Type #4: The intellectual
In the dating game, looks often trump intelligence - guys go for hotties rather than girls who can stand their ground in a heated debate

I don't completely agree with this statement.  While looks are very important, the one trait that cannot be overlooked is stupid.  and it can't be fixed by going on a diet, dressing better, or whatever.

you might think looks are enough for a little while, but being embarrassed to bring the girl out in public for the dumbassed things she'll say is probably the least attractive trait a person (male or female) could have.

/ by the way, intelligence and looks are not mutually exclusive.  they're unrelated coincidences.
 
2013-05-15 01:02:51 PM
I don't think I dated more than 3 or 4 women before I 'settled down' with the one I married (almost 18 years ago).  Some of us are just smarter than others, apparently.
 
2013-05-15 01:05:25 PM
1. Done and regretted
2. Done and regretted
3. Done and regretted
4. Done and regretted
5. Done and regretted

Married a foreign woman.

/Done and regretted
 
2013-05-15 01:06:15 PM
Settling down. What a quaint anachronism.
 
2013-05-15 01:07:01 PM

pute kisses like a man: Type #4: The intellectual
In the dating game, looks often trump intelligence - guys go for hotties rather than girls who can stand their ground in a heated debate

I don't completely agree with this statement.  While looks are very important, the one trait that cannot be overlooked is stupid.  and it can't be fixed by going on a diet, dressing better, or whatever.

you might think looks are enough for a little while, but being embarrassed to bring the girl out in public for the dumbassed things she'll say is probably the least attractive trait a person (male or female) could have.

/ by the way, intelligence and looks are not mutually exclusive.  they're unrelated coincidences.


In short, no matter how good she looks some guy somewhere is sick of her shiat.

Your handle suggests you are a sage or wizard in this field.
 
2013-05-15 01:07:19 PM

SkeletorUpInHere: So.... crazy biatch wasn't on the list?


Because I've dated quite a few of those....


THIS... SOO SOO MUCH THIS.
 
2013-05-15 01:07:25 PM
"Men are so often intimidated by smart women - they have vulnerable egos and never want to feel as if any woman is showing them up"

This old frustrating chestnut again. Not all guys are that insecure. I would absolutely love to date someone who inspires me to be smarter or better just to keep up. Sadly, I comprehensively repel that kind of quality person. Put me in front of an underemployed, unmotivated reality TV fan for ten minutes, though, and I'll be avoiding her calls for months. Sigh.
 
2013-05-15 01:07:32 PM
Little Person
Thai Hooker
Siamese Twins (still on the bucket list)
Multiple Personality Disorder
No Common Language
Adrenaline Junkie

*checks list*

Seemed a little.....vanilla.
 
2013-05-15 01:08:23 PM
The one that takes it in the can regularly is the kind that I would prefer to settle down with.
 
2013-05-15 01:09:00 PM

bagumpity: The Hot and Crazy.  You will do things that you will look back on with regret, shame, horror, and affectionate nostalgia.  And they'll be the same things.  Good luck not getting stabbed, though.


I once dated two women in a row, both named Patty. My friends remember them as "Rich Patty" and "Crazy Patty."

Crazy Patty was also Latina, a Peruvian in fact. A hot little number who thought that if you had five minutes to kill before you had to leave for a concert, that was five minutes you could spend having sex.

She also did things like throw a wine bottle at me during a party (I ducked, but the wall was not so lucky), kidney-punch me after a particularly heated argument (also in public) and tried to set my car on fire (she was too drunk to succeed).

Ah, yes, Crazy Patty. Loads of fun. Kinda like having a venomous snake in the house.
 
2013-05-15 01:09:51 PM

Rustybumperjack: The one that takes it in the can regularly is the kind that I would prefer to settle down with.


Fan of prison movies? Greek Statuary?
nttawwt
 
2013-05-15 01:10:55 PM

SkeletorUpInHere: So.... crazy biatch wasn't on the list?


Because I've dated quite a few of those....


They're ALL crazy...
 
2013-05-15 01:11:51 PM

ObscureNameHere: I don't think I dated more than 3 or 4 women before I 'settled down' with the one I married (almost 18 years ago).  Some of us are just smarter than others, apparently.



The idea that you "need" to date many people before getting married is a fallacy. It plays into the idea that there is one perfect person for each of us, when in reality, there are many people with whom one could be happy. On the same hand, some people, due to their own internal bullshiat, will never be happy with anyone.


Dating a lot is fine, but the danger is then when "the one" starts pissing us off, we can conclude that she isn't the one anymore. No relationship is without it's brain damage.
 
2013-05-15 01:13:01 PM

Magnanimous_J: I think there are some traits that are so toxic to long term happiness, that you should date them at least once so you can spot them a mile away and avoid forever.

1) The abuser


Check.

2) The weakling

Check

3) The addict

Missed this one.

4) The insatiable (not in the good way)

You mean the unpleasable?  Check.

and most importantly

5) The girl who is incapable of amusing herself for any length of time (so important it deserves a longer title)


Sweet merciful farkmonkeys, check.

Gentlemen, a life alone is infinitely better than a life spent with someone who makes you miserable.  If you're not happy, get the hell out, and for fark's sake don't get bound up with rings or kids.
 
2013-05-15 01:15:07 PM
"The Seductress"?  Seriously?  If you want to write an article for men, don't use mincy Jane Austen-type words OK?  I might have actually read this piece of crap article if the headings had been something like:

The Debutante With Daddy Issues
The Fark Buddy
The Total Freak Who Will Try Anything Once
The Crazy Jealous Redhead
The Girl Who Prefers Anal

/my top five
 
2013-05-15 01:16:32 PM
I have had all of those and most were a combination. Jeri one of the best women I dated was one of the guys, older, intelligent and a seductress. This article is pretty useless considering that women can not be broken down into categories like these and if think they can then that is a good indicator as to why you are single. The best advice is to find someone you enjoy having a conversation with and the rest will occur on its own with very little effort. It is only a matter of time which can be lengthy so depending on how much you desire the person I would think about moving on no later than two years if the relationship hasn't become sexual.
 
2013-05-15 01:17:22 PM
What's the difference between a woman and a battery?  A battery has a positive side.
 
2013-05-15 01:17:46 PM
- The nympho
- The prude
- The girl who likes it rough
- The girl who wants to be humiliated and used
- The girl who likes to take charge (in the bedroom)
 
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