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(Huffington Post)   Some days you're the elephant poacher, some days you're the elephant poachee   (huffingtonpost.com) divider line 72
    More: Fail, Zimbabwe, wildlife trade, United Nations Permanent Representative, Botswana, potable water, WWF  
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6095 clicks; posted to Main » on 15 May 2013 at 11:18 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-05-15 11:07:04 AM  
Groovin' on the freeway, gauge is on the red
Gun down on my gasoline, I believe I'm gonna crack a head.
 
2013-05-15 11:19:45 AM  
Karma's a biatch, ey?
 
2013-05-15 11:22:45 AM  
Elephants never forget.
And they never forgive.
Honestly, he got off easy.
I have no compunction about tying a man naked on an ant hill if he is a poacher.
Fark him in hell.
 
2013-05-15 11:23:10 AM  
i.imgur.com
 
2013-05-15 11:23:45 AM  
40,000 elephants slaughtered each year?
a-fu(king-mazing.
The corruption runs deep over there.
 
2013-05-15 11:24:30 AM  

A Terrible Human: [i.imgur.com image 750x500]


Thanks.  I was worried I'd have to dig that out.
 
2013-05-15 11:25:13 AM  
Ah, yes! Elephant jokes!

Q: What do elephants have between their toes?

A: Slow running natives.
 
2013-05-15 11:26:48 AM  

dryknife: Ah, yes! Elephant jokes!

Q: What do elephants have between their toes?

A: Slow running natives.


Q: What do you do with an elephant with three balls...

A: Walk him, and pitch to the rhino.
 
hej [TotalFark]
2013-05-15 11:27:34 AM  
Did somebody shoot the 'amusing' tag for it's ivory?
 
2013-05-15 11:27:54 AM  
I saw a show about former US soldiers working in Africa to stop poaching, but they weren't armed. I'd be totally fine with them doing a Denzel Washington Man on Fire on the poachers.
 
2013-05-15 11:29:35 AM  

hej: Did somebody shoot the 'amusing' tag for it's ivory?


its


/sorry for the nazi
 
2013-05-15 11:29:37 AM  
The picked him up with a spatula and buried him between two pieces of plywood.
 
2013-05-15 11:30:18 AM  
FARK needs a "Win" tag.   For the elephant.

/suck it, poachers - every one of you
 
2013-05-15 11:30:40 AM  
FTFA: Manjoro and his friend Noluck Tafuruka are said to have visited the park between April 19 and 26, armed with two rifles, for the purpose of hunting.

Sounds like the elephant got the wrong guy.
 
2013-05-15 11:30:47 AM  
Remember me, Mr. Schneider? Kenya. 1947. If you're going to shoot at an elephant, Mr. Schneider, you'd better be prepared to finish the job.
 
2013-05-15 11:31:16 AM  
His friend's name was Noluck.  Ironic.
 
2013-05-15 11:31:26 AM  
nunununahh
nunununahh
nunununahh

that's the sound of me trying to start my sympathy motor. It won't start.
 
2013-05-15 11:32:57 AM  

dryknife: Ah, yes! Elephant jokes!


Here's my favorite elephant joke:

Q.  What do you do when an elephant comes in your window?

A.  Start swimming!
 
2013-05-15 11:33:10 AM  
Poachers should be forced to fight the animal they were trying to kill with no weapons and only wearing a loin cloth. If said animal is more harmless than deadly, it can have an angry mama Gizzly fight in its stead.
 
2013-05-15 11:33:22 AM  

A Terrible Human: [i.imgur.com image 750x500]


Beat me to it.

So I'll throw up one of these:
durbnpoisn.comli.com

Poachers suck.  He deserved what he got.

I love how th article points out that the elephants may be starting to fight back against the poachers intentionally.  Good for them.  Squash them all!
 
2013-05-15 11:33:59 AM  
Good although I've much happier if the elephants could trample the people buying the black-market ivory. They're the real villains here.
 
2013-05-15 11:34:30 AM  
yay!
 
2013-05-15 11:35:39 AM  

Ivo Shandor: Remember me, Mr. Schneider? Kenya. 1947. If you're going to shoot at an elephant, Mr. Schneider, you'd better be prepared to finish the job.


What'd they do with my leg?  They made it into a wastebasket?
 
2013-05-15 11:36:12 AM  

durbnpoisn: A Terrible Human: [i.imgur.com image 750x500]

Beat me to it.

So I'll throw up one of these:
[durbnpoisn.comli.com image 60x54]

Poachers suck.  He deserved what he got.

I love how th article points out that the elephants may be starting to fight back against the poachers intentionally.  Good for them.  Squash them all!


Most likely, the elephant is pissed off and charging because it has a slug buried in its shoulder. May die from infection at some point.
 
2013-05-15 11:36:21 AM  
Good thing this didn't happen in America... they'd have to put the elephant down.
 
2013-05-15 11:41:55 AM  
i.imgur.com
 
2013-05-15 11:43:36 AM  

A Terrible Human: [i.imgur.com image 750x500]


THIS! 100% All poacherS deserve that fate.

/IMO
 
2013-05-15 11:44:15 AM  
This should have had a Hero tag, for the elephant.
 
2013-05-15 11:44:23 AM  

Evil Mackerel: A Terrible Human: [i.imgur.com image 750x500]

THIS! 100% All poacherS deserve that fate.

/IMO


Bob Parsons too.
 
2013-05-15 11:44:39 AM  

Evil Mackerel: A Terrible Human: [i.imgur.com image 750x500]

THIS! 100% All poachers deserve that fate.

/IMO


FTFM
 
2013-05-15 11:48:05 AM  
i.dailymail.co.uk

High five!
 
2013-05-15 11:48:47 AM  
Some days you are Peet some days you are Repeat.
 
2013-05-15 11:51:48 AM  

gilgigamesh: Good although I've much happier if the elephants could trample the people buying the black-market ivory. They're the real villains here.


Exactly, no market for ivory, no money for poaching.
 
2013-05-15 11:51:51 AM  
So did they use an
barrygoldberg.net
 
2013-05-15 11:51:56 AM  
Fail tag Subby?

Hero tag more appropriate. ( for the elephant )
 
2013-05-15 11:52:38 AM  
A ban enacted by the Convention on International Trade in Endangered Species (CITES) in 1990 was effective in toppling the ivory trade, The New York Times notes, but that ban only lasted until 1999 when Zimbabwe, Botswana and Namibia were permitted to sell 50 tons of stockpiled ivory to Japan. Another sale went through in 2008 and killings soared

Well that was dumb.  Keep it banned and there's a lot less reason to kill the elephants.
 
2013-05-15 11:52:55 AM  
Took a bus from Zim to Zambia in 2006 and had to wait at night for the border crossing near Kariba to open in the morning. I just got to sleep about 3 AM when I was awakened to the sounds of screaming and crashing. Everyone was yelling to close the windows. I looked out and saw the driver of the bus next to mine run out the bus door and then run back in the bus. After a few hectic minutes things calmed down and I got the story. An elephant had attacked the other bus, first smashing in its side and then reaching in for the driver. It then tried to get two boys sleeping under a truck but only got the blanket they were sleeping under. Got the backstory from a guard at the border. About three weeks before, a bus passenger had walked to a shebeen (bar) to get a drink and on the way back encountered an elephant. He was so mangled the only way he was recognized was because another passenger remembered his shirt. The Zim government responded by shooting two elephants. The bus attack was round three. Never found out if other incidents followed. That was the last event of one of the more memorable days in my life.
 
2013-05-15 11:53:53 AM  
What's grey and comes in quarts?
 
2013-05-15 12:05:22 PM  
Ftfa: Treehugger quoted as saying "elephants may be purposefully striking back at the threat of poachers"

Where do these idiots get the funds to keep functioning ferchristsake.
 
2013-05-15 12:05:40 PM  

you have pee hands: A ban enacted by the Convention on International Trade in Endangered Species (CITES) in 1990 was effective in toppling the ivory trade, The New York Times notes, but that ban only lasted until 1999 when Zimbabwe, Botswana and Namibia were permitted to sell 50 tons of stockpiled ivory to Japan. Another sale went through in 2008 and killings soared

Well that was dumb.  Keep it banned and there's a lot less reason to kill the elephants.


For money.

I've got no problem with sport hunting of elephants, but market hunting (which is what poaching is, illegal market hunting) is bad.  With sport hunting, it's regulated, the trophy fees get plowed back into conservation, and everybody wins, even the elephants, because overall the balance sheet is in their favor:  The protections afforded by sport hunting regulations greatly outweigh the number of individual animals taken.

Market hunters, on the other hand, are only in it for the profit.  They don't care about preservation of the species, unlike sport hunters.
 
2013-05-15 12:08:10 PM  
media-cdn.tripadvisor.com
GOOD
 
2013-05-15 12:20:02 PM  
dittybopper: 
 They don't care about preservation of the species, unlike sport hunters.

What utter shiat.
 
2013-05-15 12:21:18 PM  

dittybopper: I've got no problem with sport hunting of elephants, but market hunting (which is what poaching is, illegal market hunting) is bad. With sport hunting, it's regulated, the trophy fees get plowed back into conservation, and everybody wins, even the elephants, because overall the balance sheet is in their favor: The protections afforded by sport hunting regulations greatly outweigh the number of individual animals taken.


I have no problem with sport hunting in general but I don't really like it for elephants.  They're bigger than a panel van and relatively fearless because they lack natural predators as adults, so shooting an elephant is less a matter of hunter skill and more a matter of if you can afford to fly to Africa and have someone point you in their general direction.  Also, they've got a relatively low population and reproduce quite slowly (have calves starting at ~20, with 4-5 years in between) so they're a very easy species to depopulate.
 
2013-05-15 12:24:42 PM  

tripleseven: dittybopper: 
 They don't care about preservation of the species, unlike sport hunters.

What utter shiat.


No it's not.  Check out the facts on legalized sport hunting of elephants.  Populations up, poaching down to near zero.  Locals are given a stake in the money.
 
2013-05-15 12:30:50 PM  

Cold_Sassy: dryknife: Ah, yes! Elephant jokes!

Here's my favorite elephant joke:

Q.  What do you do when an elephant comes in your window?

A.  Start swimming!


My favorite is a variation on that: What's gray and comes in quarts?
 
2013-05-15 12:31:40 PM  
What's the black sticky stuff between an elephant's toes?

Slow poachers
 
2013-05-15 12:37:59 PM  

brandent: hej: Did somebody shoot the 'amusing' tag for it's ivory?

its


/sorry for the nazi


lol my fiance just got ripped the other night by her professor for the same thing.
 
2013-05-15 12:38:40 PM  

tripleseven: dittybopper: 
 They don't care about preservation of the species, unlike sport hunters.

What utter shiat.


Name a species that was *SPORT* hunted to extinction or near extinction.  I bet every single species you can think of was hunted to the brink or past it not through sport hunting, but through market hunting (hunting for profit) or subsistence hunting (hunting for food).
 
2013-05-15 12:44:41 PM  
I hope the elephant yanked out the buggers teeth and sold 'em.  And was the pachyderm wearing pyjamas?
 
2013-05-15 12:46:24 PM  
Good for the Elephant!!!!!

I also love reading how the Asian Elephants are actively seeking revenge against villages who try to drive them out of traditional ranges.
 
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