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(BBC)   Ten questions on grammar that may sort the Fark Grammar Nazis from the wannabes   (bbc.co.uk) divider line 37
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12045 clicks; posted to Main » on 14 May 2013 at 7:19 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Archived thread
2013-05-14 07:10:12 AM  
6 votes:
Alright guys, their ain't no reason your not gonna have alot of fun doing this. Its rediculously easy. Its even funner than those grammer thing's they do on Facebook.
2013-05-14 09:25:30 AM  
4 votes:
9/10
i.imgur.com
2013-05-14 07:56:03 AM  
4 votes:
11/10. I awarded myself a point of extra credit for noting how many words were misspelled with an extra u in them.
2013-05-14 07:48:05 AM  
4 votes:

AlanSmithee: Could "I was sat in a chair" be grammatical if the form  of 'sitting' is the transitive one?
Eg:
(An adult talking about a time he was 3 years old)
"At the cottage, my parents had a choice of how to seat us three kids. There was an orange chair, a blue chair, a stool, and a bench. Sister got the bench. Big brother was forced to takethe stool. As for me, I was sat on a chair, the blue one".
Or should it be  "I was seated"?


The correct form would be, "I was ensat upon yon chair, blue, both in hue and mood."
2013-05-14 07:33:01 AM  
3 votes:
9/10. I don't care if Hilary is a man or woman.
2013-05-14 11:31:36 AM  
2 votes:
1/10

Thank god for Hilary!
2013-05-14 10:43:49 AM  
2 votes:

dickfreckle: One thing I don't get is why grammar nazis think that anyone cares to meticulously proofread before posting. It's a website where we tell dick and fart jokes for chrissakes. Fark all that...preview is for p*ssies. I go in dry.


Why? I'll tell you why. It is whycause if you fail to check your work prior to posting you risk turning the dick and fart jokes into duck and fort jokes which lack the punch, the joie-du-vivre, the vibrancy and essence of all that makes us human with our understanding and appreciation of penises and flatulence. Duck jokes? Marginally humorous and as Woody Allen taught, "duck" is funnier than "chicken", just as "Buick" is more funny than "Chevrolet". It's that hard "ck", which again brings us back to "dick", naturally. And a fort joke? Perhaps if you're in the Army or if you're a small child with a penis who laughs because he's hung a sign reading, "No Gerls alowed in my Fart" over the doorway to his penis fort. But generally speaking there is little humor to be gained from a fort. Farts, on the other hand, are a universal source of amusement. Even in Vonnegut's dystopian future in which we've all evolved to resemble fur seals, farts are funny. Forts, not funny.

This, citizen, is why it matters.
2013-05-14 09:54:30 AM  
2 votes:
I only know two languages: English and bad English.

www.wearysloth.com
2013-05-14 07:59:54 AM  
2 votes:

grokca: Most of them had no punctuation at the end of the sentences, so most were incorrect.


Oh look, we've got an Obersturmbannführer in the thread.
2013-05-14 07:56:06 AM  
2 votes:
6 I gotted right.


/ Him: "Where you at?"
// Her: "Don't end a sentence with a preposition."
/// Him: "Where you at, biatch?"
2013-05-14 07:50:58 AM  
2 votes:
Most of them had no punctuation at the end of the sentences, so most were incorrect.
2013-05-14 07:49:11 AM  
2 votes:

AngryJailhouseFistfark: AlanSmithee: Could "I was sat in a chair" be grammatical if the form  of 'sitting' is the transitive one?
Eg:
(An adult talking about a time he was 3 years old)
"At the cottage, my parents had a choice of how to seat us three kids. There was an orange chair, a blue chair, a stool, and a bench. Sister got the bench. Big brother was forced to takethe stool. As for me, I was sat on a chair, the blue one".
Or should it be  "I was seated"?

The correct form would be, "I was ensat upon yon chair, blue, both in hue and mood."


OH MOTHERfarkINGshiatASSGODDAMMIT!!! I screwed that up. Should be: "I was ensat upon yon chair, blue, both in hue and humour."
2013-05-14 07:46:19 AM  
2 votes:

texmeth: 7/10. Who names their son Hilary?  Misplaced modifier and gerund, you can suck it also.


People who name their other boys Lindsay, Tracy, and Vivian, i.e. 19th century colonialists in safari dress.

9/10
2013-05-14 07:33:36 AM  
2 votes:
If you don't score at least 80% like me, than your an moran.
2013-05-14 07:30:52 AM  
2 votes:
3.bp.blogspot.com
2013-05-14 07:26:49 AM  
2 votes:
6/10.  I believe that places me within the Grammar Hitler Jugend.
2013-05-14 05:02:56 PM  
1 votes:
What does the BBC know about English?  If the first question, they couldn't even spell 'neighbor.' correctly.
2013-05-14 02:04:18 PM  
1 votes:
7/10, Meh. I got the Hilary one right.  I read these like they're bawdy sex tales. This one started of alright, with the man with a pussy problem.  The ambiguous sex hookup was fun as always. The Z-snapping uncle rocking some chicks' landing strip with his whiskers was right-on. The dude imperatively demanding a model give him so sweet gerunding was just wrong. The cross-dressing king regally finished up the tale.
2013-05-14 11:48:16 AM  
1 votes:

TheShavingofOccam123: I was sat down by my father and given a stern lecture.

/"was sat down" not "was sat"


I was sat in a slatted chair by my father and now I am very scared.

/was sat, not was sat down
2013-05-14 11:22:45 AM  
1 votes:
Where's meow said the dog?
2013-05-14 10:35:31 AM  
1 votes:

ginandbacon: here to help: ginandbacon: 10 for 10. Mother was an editor at Houghton Mifflin for most of my life.

And I bet she had a "hought mifflin". Rawr.

Better than your mother's miffled hought.

/amidoinitright?


Haughty Milf?
2013-05-14 10:31:14 AM  
1 votes:

AlanSmithee: Rashnu: My face was once seated upon.

Hey, much better than my example!

So, how's your mom doing?


She's actually intransitive. But I hear yours loves taking objects.
2013-05-14 10:18:14 AM  
1 votes:
My face was once seated upon.
2013-05-14 10:02:50 AM  
1 votes:
farm9.staticflickr.com
2013-05-14 09:32:23 AM  
1 votes:
7 out of 10. I may have done fewer better considering this is May but I'm satting in a chair watching my neighbor's cat and his only other pet use their dangling modifiers to soil the soil in my garden.

/why should I listen to people who stuff extra vowels into every word then don't provide the numbers to the answers.
/Be British! Obfuscate!
2013-05-14 08:53:53 AM  
1 votes:
8/10.  We should get some type of recognition beside our user name. Perhaps the Fark squirrel nuts could become known as the "Dangling Participles".  That would also be a good name for a rock band.
2013-05-14 08:51:29 AM  
1 votes:

ginandbacon: 10 for 10. Mother was an editor at Houghton Mifflin for most of my life.


And I bet she had a "hought mifflin". Rawr.
2013-05-14 08:46:42 AM  
1 votes:

whistleridge: Alright guys, their ain't no reason your not gonna have alot of fun doing this. Its rediculously easy. Its even funner than those grammer thing's they do on Facebook.


Oh definately.
2013-05-14 08:41:14 AM  
1 votes:
8/10

Had no clue what Gerund was...
2013-05-14 07:47:10 AM  
1 votes:

Millennium: 10/10, but I only knew Hilary's gender because I've seen that question before, and I still don't get how the answer makes any sense.


Comma placement for restrictive and non-restrictive relative clauses. I've taught this material on two continents and the question is a bunch of malarkey anyway. Nobody cares about that guy's sissy brother.
2013-05-14 07:38:22 AM  
1 votes:
8/10 and it should have been at least 9 but I'm half awake.

/eats shoots and leaves
2013-05-14 07:37:53 AM  
1 votes:
7/10. Who names their son Hilary?  Misplaced modifier and gerund, you can suck it also.
2013-05-14 07:37:05 AM  
1 votes:
9/10. Thanks, Hilary.
2013-05-14 07:33:39 AM  
1 votes:

YoOjo: Ten question's on grammer that might sort out the Fark Grammer Nazi's from the wannabe's


FTFYoOjo
2013-05-14 07:28:37 AM  
1 votes:

whistleridge: Alright guys, their ain't no reason your not gonna have alot of fun doing this. Its rediculously easy. Its even funner than those grammer thing's they do on Facebook.


Ya butt irregardless its kinda innerestingly different than the every day stuff u see sumtimes.
2013-05-14 07:23:36 AM  
1 votes:

whistleridge: Alright guys, their ain't no reason your not gonna have alot of fun doing this. Its rediculously easy. Its even funner than those grammer thing's they do on Facebook.


fingernails. chalkboard.
2013-05-14 06:45:57 AM  
1 votes:
1/2 and then I got bored.
 
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