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(Komo)   "Yes, lying in a steaming tub with a bottle of Kahlua and ignoring the children's knocks on the bathroom door all afternoon is not the most mature coping strategy. So stipulated, your honor"   (komonews.com) divider line 46
    More: Amusing, Kahlua, coping strategies, bathroom door, Play-Doh, flavored vodka, stay-at-home dad, The New Yorker  
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8073 clicks; posted to Main » on 14 May 2013 at 6:52 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



46 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-05-14 01:14:31 AM
Didn't the Rolling Stones cover this back in 1966?

http://youtu.be/tfGYSHy1jQs
 
2013-05-14 07:03:46 AM
He without sin....
 
2013-05-14 07:09:17 AM
At least it's an ethos
 
2013-05-14 07:10:22 AM
I just finished giving my wee one her 3am snack and am really getting a kick...

/SHHHHH DON'T WAKE HER UP, YOU farkER
 
2013-05-14 07:17:42 AM
Not guilty by reason of mental disease or defect.

/kids cause many mental defects
 
2013-05-14 07:28:24 AM
Who the hell just drinks Kahlua straight? Ugh.
 
2013-05-14 07:29:54 AM

OH! I know! Here....wait, this one's a peach...

OK...

Insanity is Hereditary...
you get it from your children!



Huh!? I'm putting that on hats and T-shirt and I'll sell millions.
 
2013-05-14 07:35:39 AM
Wasn't this a book by Erma Bombeck?
 
2013-05-14 07:40:25 AM

digitalrain: Who the hell just drinks Kahlua straight? Ugh.


Sometimes one has nothing to mix things with and  the stores are shut .....
myob
 
2013-05-14 07:42:33 AM
Angelina Jolie will not be a breast feeding momma.  She cut off her teats in fear of cancer.

Given the amount of cancer and diseases her superficial life has caused, regardless of her many flights to play with starvings kids on camera, she should get the rest of her organs removed.. just in case one might kill her.
 
2013-05-14 07:48:18 AM
It does however sound like a nice way to pass the afternoon...
 
2013-05-14 07:49:11 AM
This whole thing reads like, "this shiat is hard, I'm giving up" or "I made a huge mistake and now I have to live with the consequences for the first time in my life"

Either way...
 
2013-05-14 07:51:07 AM

digitalrain: Who the hell just drinks Kahlua straight? Ugh.


An alcoholic who hides in the bathroom from her kids needs?
 
2013-05-14 07:53:47 AM
Calgonite!  Take me away!
 
2013-05-14 07:54:21 AM
i1114.photobucket.com
 
2013-05-14 07:59:11 AM
Mama never drew a picture of me pooping. I was deprived.
 
2013-05-14 08:12:29 AM

vudukungfu: Wasn't this a book by Erma Bombeck?


She only hinted at the drinking and swearing. The Post-Modernists come right out and spread their vices on your table as so much botulinum-tainted marmalade.
 
2013-05-14 08:20:28 AM
No no no. You're doing it wrong. You tell the kids you will take a bath, let them see you go in (making a big spectacle about it), lock the door, then sneak out the window. You are now free to go to the bar as they continue to pound on the bathroom door.
 
2013-05-14 08:27:59 AM
Well if you had done it right the kids would play with each other and not always on top of you. I can't stand listening to stay at home mom's complain about how hard it is. I work a full time job and raise two kids at the same time by myself, so shut up.
 
2013-05-14 08:33:37 AM
i527.photobucket.com
 
2013-05-14 08:47:51 AM
Sometimes its better to lock the door and whiimper in the corner,  when the alternative is screaming or hitting because you just cant take it any more.
 
2013-05-14 08:50:24 AM
Steaming tub? Kahlua straight?

... It was the nanny's weekend off and you didn't think to make sure the bar was stocked?
 
2013-05-14 08:51:46 AM

All Latest: [i527.photobucket.com image 306x436]


That pic needs pedobear in place of that teddy head
 
2013-05-14 09:37:38 AM

digitalrain: Who the hell just drinks Kahlua straight? Ugh.


on occasion . . . although, if nothing else is available, I prefer it on the rocks.

\\ mmmm, but with bailey's and vodka
\ iron butterfly FTW .. .
 
2013-05-14 09:38:34 AM
Great, more excuses as to why you're a terrible, disengaged parent.
 
2013-05-14 09:52:13 AM
Well, as long as their fathers don't get custody.  That would be cruel.
 
zez
2013-05-14 09:53:03 AM
If a dad wrote about half the things mommy bloggers get away with they would probably be arrested and the kids taken away.
 
2013-05-14 09:55:53 AM
3.bp.blogspot.com
Bring me a hot fudge sundae, and  A BOTTLE OF TEQUILA!
 
2013-05-14 10:04:53 AM

Gig103: Didn't the Rolling Stones cover this back in 1966?

http://youtu.be/tfGYSHy1jQs


Yes, it was also socially acceptable to smoke and drink around your children which lowered stress levels.  Today you have to be the picture of restraint.
 
2013-05-14 10:09:53 AM
I know I'm going to regret this, but what exactly is a "mommy blogger"?  It sounds like moms who never stop posting on their blogs about their kids.  Am I close?
 
2013-05-14 10:21:40 AM
mothersmite.com

/hot tub
 
2013-05-14 10:21:54 AM

zez: If a dad wrote about half the things mommy bloggers get away with they would probably be arrested and the kids taken away.


While that may be true, I also realize that the absolute best thing for my relationship with my kids is the fact that I leave the house for over 9 hours every day to go to work. If I didn't get a break from them, I can guarantee that I'd snap eventually. Probably sooner, rather than later.
 
2013-05-14 10:29:11 AM
Amber Dusick's blog and book are goddamned hilarious.

/currently staying at home looking after my 3 1/2 year old son - her blog is so much like my life it's scary.
 
2013-05-14 10:35:33 AM

Gonz: zez: If a dad wrote about half the things mommy bloggers get away with they would probably be arrested and the kids taken away.

While that may be true, I also realize that the absolute best thing for my relationship with my kids is the fact that I leave the house for over 9 hours every day to go to work. If I didn't get a break from them, I can guarantee that I'd snap eventually. Probably sooner, rather than later.




You're forgetting that for a good chunk of that nine hours, many kids are actually not at home.
 
2013-05-14 10:50:25 AM

Mangoose: Gonz: zez: If a dad wrote about half the things mommy bloggers get away with they would probably be arrested and the kids taken away.

While that may be true, I also realize that the absolute best thing for my relationship with my kids is the fact that I leave the house for over 9 hours every day to go to work. If I didn't get a break from them, I can guarantee that I'd snap eventually. Probably sooner, rather than later.



You're forgetting that for a good chunk of that nine hours, many kids are actually not at home.


They are when they're the really challenging ages. Like 3.
 
2013-05-14 11:02:01 AM
After reading these "parenting" books, why would any man want to get married? Much easier to adopt a child and raise them in a home where logic and reason reign rather than subject them to the horror-themed amusement park of female emotional rollercoasters, drunkeness, foulness, uncleanliness of all sorts, and otherwise irrational antisocial behaviors.
 
2013-05-14 11:49:23 AM

Gonz: Mangoose: Gonz: zez: If a dad wrote about half the things mommy bloggers get away with they would probably be arrested and the kids taken away.

While that may be true, I also realize that the absolute best thing for my relationship with my kids is the fact that I leave the house for over 9 hours every day to go to work. If I didn't get a break from them, I can guarantee that I'd snap eventually. Probably sooner, rather than later.

You're forgetting that for a good chunk of that nine hours, many kids are actually not at home.

They are when they're the really challenging ages. Like 3.




But those are the years when daytime drunk dad is funny.
 
2013-05-14 12:52:30 PM
Feepit:
After reading these "parenting" books, why would any man want to get married? Much easier to adopt a child and raise them in a home where logic and reason reign rather than subject them to the horror-themed amusement park of female emotional rollercoasters, drunkeness, foulness, uncleanliness of all sorts, and otherwise irrational antisocial behaviors.

That is the most feeble attempt at trolling ever.  Everyone knows single men can't adopt children: the radical female-dominated world of social services and adoption agencies labels all men as child molesters unless vouched for by a female partner, at which point they are downgraded to merely "potential child molesters".  This is a result of the ERA, Gloria Stenem's Femi Nazi movement, the saucer people, and Thanks Obama.
 
2013-05-14 01:24:50 PM

No Such Agency: Everyone knows single men can't adopt children


Sure they can. All that's needed is to claim they have one of those fictional psychoses wherein they believe they are a woman born, however unfortunately, into a male body.
 
zez
2013-05-14 01:27:14 PM

Gonz: Mangoose: Gonz: zez: If a dad wrote about half the things mommy bloggers get away with they would probably be arrested and the kids taken away.

While that may be true, I also realize that the absolute best thing for my relationship with my kids is the fact that I leave the house for over 9 hours every day to go to work. If I didn't get a break from them, I can guarantee that I'd snap eventually. Probably sooner, rather than later.

You're forgetting that for a good chunk of that nine hours, many kids are actually not at home.

They are when they're the really challenging ages. Like 3.


Yeah, I've been a stay at home dad for the last 9 years for a 9 year old and a 5 year old and for the last few months have been nannying a 5 month old.
 
2013-05-14 01:31:30 PM
Kids. You had 'em, now take care of 'em.
 
2013-05-14 03:37:55 PM
Feepit:
No Such Agency: Everyone knows single men can't adopt children

Sure they can. All that's needed is to claim they have one of those fictional psychoses wherein they believe they are a woman born, however unfortunately, into a male body.


Good point.  I know a guy who is ordered to pay child support for a child that isn't his, but is a Mexican anchor baby adopted by his ex-roommate who was a man named "Steve" but later became a trans sexual woman named "Laqueefa".  The court refused to allow him a DNA test because Obamacare would not pay for the child to have a needle, and is now garnishing 90% of his wages thus forcing him to sell his guns to pay his rent.
 
2013-05-14 04:07:23 PM

No Such Agency: Feepit:
No Such Agency: Everyone knows single men can't adopt children

Sure they can. All that's needed is to claim they have one of those fictional psychoses wherein they believe they are a woman born, however unfortunately, into a male body.

Good point.  I know a guy who is ordered to pay child support for a child that isn't his, but is a Mexican anchor baby adopted by his ex-roommate who was a man named "Steve" but later became a trans sexual woman named "Laqueefa".  The court refused to allow him a DNA test because Obamacare would not pay for the child to have a needle, and is now garnishing 90% of his wages thus forcing him to sell his guns to pay his rent.


nice.
 
2013-05-14 05:07:11 PM

vudukungfu: Wasn't this a book by Erma Bombeck?


Yep, and I always liked Lewis Grizzards "Don't bend over in the garden Granny, you know them taters got eyes."
 
2013-05-14 06:43:14 PM
Feepit: After reading these "parenting" books, why would any man want to get married? Much easier to adopt a child and raise them in a home where logic and reason reign rather than subject them to the horror-themed amusement park of female emotional rollercoasters, drunkeness, foulness, uncleanliness of all sorts, and otherwise irrational antisocial behaviors have children.

/fixed
 
2013-05-14 11:39:26 PM
My wife is a full-time teacher.  I'm screwing around in a PhD program that I'm not entirely sure if I hate or enjoy... but what this means, in practical terms, is that I get to spend a great deal of time taking care of my 1-year-old daughter.

It's challenging.  I have to be up when she wakes up, I get no time to myself unless she's napping (1-2 hours per day), and she is constantly in danger of harming herself or making a mess.  That is exhausting.

It's also more fulfilling than anything I've ever done.  Maybe it's because my daughter is objectively adorable and sweet, but every day I spend with her is a day that, to me, affirms the entirety of human civilization.  Frankly, if my wife earned enough money on her own, I could easily (and gladly) be a stay-at-home Dad and spend all of my time with my little girl.  YMMV, though.
 
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