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(Salon)   Zuckerberg's attempts to make us all bow to the Facebook Mobile Phone Overlords are met with a resounding, "Um... no"   (salon.com) divider line 134
    More: Fail, Facebook Mobile Phone Overlords, Mark Zuckerberg, Facebook, Dollar General  
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19835 clicks; posted to Main » on 09 May 2013 at 6:07 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-05-09 03:23:29 PM
Facebook phone?

dorothynelson.com
 
2013-05-09 03:30:35 PM
"unmitigated disaster"

LOL.  How's that Facebook stock working out for everyone?
 
2013-05-09 04:31:27 PM
and why does this surprise anyone?
 
2013-05-09 05:10:56 PM
My husband was shopping for a new phone the other day when I came across the FB phone. I truly couldn't believe I was holding something so ridiculous although now it makes sense why the mobile facebook apps are so awful.
 
2013-05-09 05:18:26 PM

PainInTheASP: "unmitigated disaster"

LOL.  How's that Facebook stock working out for everyone?


i think it's shallow AND pedantic
 
2013-05-09 05:56:52 PM

Lollipop165: My husband was shopping for a new phone the other day when I came across the FB phone. I truly couldn't believe I was holding something so ridiculous although now it makes sense why the mobile facebook apps are so awful.


And here is the root problem.

How about, instead of rolling out failures that no one could care about, FB focuses on its core success. Why do I still have to log in to the full site to do basic things like change my profile picture or certain security settings?
 
2013-05-09 06:14:05 PM
img.photobucket.com
 
2013-05-09 06:14:43 PM
Probably still going to beat the Kin though.
 
2013-05-09 06:16:52 PM
The HTC First is a decent phone on its own, not a flagship, but a good mid-range phone. The best part for some is that HTC Sense is missing, so if you use a different launcher (disable FB Home), you get vanilla Android without all of HTC's normal modifications and acceptable hardware for very cheap!

/Note: I have an HTC One and love it, but would really like a more stock UI. Wish stock android was available on it.
 
2013-05-09 06:17:13 PM
All I know is that the commercial for it makes me feel all stabby.
 
2013-05-09 06:17:17 PM
img.pandawhale.com
 
2013-05-09 06:20:34 PM

whistleridge: Lollipop165: My husband was shopping for a new phone the other day when I came across the FB phone. I truly couldn't believe I was holding something so ridiculous although now it makes sense why the mobile facebook apps are so awful.

And here is the root problem.

How about, instead of rolling out failures that no one could care about, FB focuses on its core success. Why do I still have to log in to the full site to do basic things like change my profile picture or certain security settings?


Because that's boring work.

Seriously, Facebook could have a really good service if the developers just had some adult supervision.
 
2013-05-09 06:21:40 PM
Facebook.  The site that forces me, almost every time I go to it, to say, "NO, goddammit, NO, I don't want 'stories' in an order that you pick, I want them in most recent order.  As I've told you 100+ times already."

The odds that I would buy one of these phones is zero.  The odds that I would take one for free is zero.  The odds that I would take one if you gave me $5 is still zero, because it's not worth the effort to take it to Best Buy for e-cycling.  You want me to take one, I want at least $20.  It will never get out of the box.
 
2013-05-09 06:22:42 PM
FTFA: "For confirmation we need only look at the Google Play store, where the Facebook Home app, which can be installed on select Android phones, has now fallen to the No. 338 ranking in the category of free apps. That's 200 spots lower than it ranked just two weeks ago. "

Maybe because he made it available on only like five phones. WTF did he think was going to happen?
 
2013-05-09 06:23:18 PM

Some 'Splainin' To Do: All I know is that the commercial for it makes me feel all stabby.


No kidding, it's like they're selling it as "buy this so you can slack off at work EVEN MORE!"
 
2013-05-09 06:24:14 PM
Facebook should be focusing on fixing their non-Facebook Home Android app. It's farking useless except for a quick way to upload a picture. The News Feeds continuously show stories from weeks ago at the top of the page.
 
2013-05-09 06:29:00 PM

JayCab: Some 'Splainin' To Do: All I know is that the commercial for it makes me feel all stabby.

No kidding, it's like they're selling it as "buy this so you can slack off at work EVEN MORE!"


I hadn't seen that one until you mentioned it but... yeah.

This is the one I'm talking about, with the teen at the freakin' dinner table. It's like the message is "Are you a self-absorbed tw*t? Then do we have the product for you!"
 
2013-05-09 06:29:42 PM
I really don't understand what some of these tech companies are thinking.  Basically, at this point, there are five behemoths in the tech world: Apple, Microsoft, Amazon, Google and Facebook.  All of them do different things and it's just fine that way.  But all of them make occasional half-assed attempts to intrude on each other's turf for no apparent reason.  In other sectors, companies tend to focus on what they do well.  In the tech sector, there seems to be this attitude of "if it's tech-related, we need to own it."
 
2013-05-09 06:32:17 PM
Why buy a Facebook phone when you can download Home for any phone? I'm not a big fan, but I can see it being a must have for daily users.
 
2013-05-09 06:32:30 PM
When I heard the details of FaceBook Home, I was horrified at the thought of using it personally, but I assumed that there was a demographic (probably teens) that doesn't care about privacy or advertising and for whom the product would be appealing.

I guess I was wrong.
 
2013-05-09 06:32:43 PM

skinink: Facebook should be focusing on fixing their non-Facebook Home Android app. It's farking useless except for a quick way to upload a picture. The News Feeds continuously show stories from weeks ago at the top of the page.


I don't have that problem with it on my phone or tablet.
 
2013-05-09 06:32:52 PM

skinink: Facebook should be focusing on fixing their non-Facebook Home Android app. It's farking useless except for a quick way to upload a picture. The News Feeds continuously show stories from weeks ago at the top of the page.


It's such a POS that I uninstalled it the day this was announced. Their graph search is awful too IMO. I use it less and less. Good luck on your next venture Zuck, you intelligent, obnoxious control freak.
 
2013-05-09 06:33:40 PM

Super Chronic: I really don't understand what some of these tech companies are thinking.  Basically, at this point, there are five behemoths in the tech world: Apple, Microsoft, Amazon, Google and Facebook.  All of them do different things and it's just fine that way.  But all of them make occasional half-assed attempts to intrude on each other's turf for no apparent reason.  In other sectors, companies tend to focus on what they do well.  In the tech sector, there seems to be this attitude of "if it's tech-related, we need to own it."



You forgot  PolandYahoo. Seriously though, has Facebook jumped the shark? My grandma asked to be my friend the other day.

Can mock W because he is my boy.
 
2013-05-09 06:37:31 PM

cannotsuggestaname: and why does this surprise anyone?


Seriously. The ad campaign boils down to "Now you can be an even bigger douchebag during social events."

I can't believe they thought that message would spur sales.
 
2013-05-09 06:38:28 PM
Facebook should stop farking around and just stop 'improving' their page.  Every single time a middle manager gets a hair up his ass about making his mark, we get another revamp of the site that just makes it just a little more useless.
 
2013-05-09 06:40:39 PM

great_tigers: Seriously though, has Facebook jumped the shark? My grandma asked to be my friend the other day.


 
Stan, poke your grandma
 
2013-05-09 06:41:09 PM

xenophon10k: cannotsuggestaname: and why does this surprise anyone?

Seriously. The ad campaign boils down to "Now you can be an even bigger douchebag during social events."

I can't believe they thought that message would spur sales.


Still doesn't match the passive-aggressive douchebaggery of Windows 8/Windows Phone/Bing commercials.
 
2013-05-09 06:45:13 PM
Facebook?

How about No
 
2013-05-09 06:47:38 PM
It should have been free in the first place. Sorry but you can get a SG3, Nokia 920, and Iphone4s for less or the same price as this midrange phone.
 
2013-05-09 06:48:48 PM
I'm been an IT guy since the days of core memory, and I wouldn't be caught dead using Facebook. Or Twitter. Or any other social meeting site (Fark and Liveleak excepted). I'd rather listen to the screeching of nails on a chalkboard.

Try reading a book instead. You might actually enjoy it.

I'm on Le Mort de Arthur now by Sir Thomas Malory. Tristram is kicking ass! Even if he is from Cornwall.
 
2013-05-09 06:49:20 PM

skinink: Facebook should be focusing on fixing their non-Facebook Home Android app. It's farking useless except for a quick way to upload a picture. The News Feeds continuously show stories from weeks ago at the top of the page.


You can upload a picture? Lucky. I'm using a Galaxy S3 with 4g and it always stalls out on me when I try to upload a picture.
 
2013-05-09 06:49:34 PM

Pointy Tail of Satan: I'm been an IT guy since the days of core memory, and I wouldn't be caught dead using Facebook. Or Twitter. Or any other social meeting site (Fark and Liveleak excepted). I'd rather listen to the screeching of nails on a chalkboard.

Try reading a book instead. You might actually enjoy it.

I'm on Le Mort de Arthur now by Sir Thomas Malory. Tristram is kicking ass! Even if he is from Cornwall.


I bet you don't even own a TV.
 
2013-05-09 06:49:51 PM

Mentat: xenophon10k: cannotsuggestaname: and why does this surprise anyone?

Seriously. The ad campaign boils down to "Now you can be an even bigger douchebag during social events."

I can't believe they thought that message would spur sales.

Still doesn't match the passive-aggressive douchebaggery of Windows 8/Windows Phone/Bing commercials.


True, but at least those aren't trying to get YOU to be the douchebag. It's just Microsoft being themselves.
 
2013-05-09 06:49:54 PM

whistleridge: How about, instead of rolling out failures that no one could care about, FB focuses on its core success. Why do I still have to log in to the full site to do basic things like change my profile picture or certain security settings?


Because the security of android is shiat and they know that?
 
2013-05-09 06:50:38 PM
Most of us are probably just waiting for a critical mass of our friends to move somewhere else, like Google+ or whatever the next thing is.

Personally, I still use FB, but less often. I'm much more likely to post my random thoughts on Twitter now.
 
2013-05-09 06:52:04 PM

Pointy Tail of Satan: I'm been an IT guy since the days of core memory, and I wouldn't be caught dead using Facebook. Or Twitter. Or any other social meeting site (Fark and Liveleak excepted). I'd rather listen to the screeching of nails on a chalkboard.

Try reading a book instead. You might actually enjoy it.

I'm on Le Mort de Arthur now by Sir Thomas Malory. Tristram is kicking ass! Even if he is from Cornwall.


Some of us can deal with average activities like checking facebook, reading a book, and tying our shoes during any given day without completely freaking out.
 
2013-05-09 06:52:06 PM

Super Chronic: I really don't understand what some of these tech companies are thinking.  Basically, at this point, there are five behemoths in the tech world: Apple, Microsoft, Amazon, Google and Facebook.  All of them do different things and it's just fine that way.  But all of them make occasional half-assed attempts to intrude on each other's turf for no apparent reason.  In other sectors, companies tend to focus on what they do well.  In the tech sector, there seems to be this attitude of "if it's tech-related, we need to own it."


Simply doing what they do well now will mean the companies will risk becoming large irrelevant in the future. And the future appears to be mobile devices. Smartphones sales already exceed sales for laptops and desktops. Tablets sales will soon surpass laptops and desktops. For the tech companies, they must be able to make money off the mobile devices otherwise someone else will. Only a handful of companies use IBM's OS now; Mircosoft maybe in the same position in a few years if they can't figure out how to sell Windows Phone or RT.
 
2013-05-09 06:52:18 PM
Ok.  I'll take one with one caveat:  Because I am the product being sold, I wish to know how much of a discount using this phone will give me from my carrier bills/Google Play store/etc.  The article doesn't seem to indicate it does have a discount attached to it for... well... anything.

Guess Mark doesn't want my personal details then does he?
 
2013-05-09 06:55:35 PM
Facebook is kind of like this story i read in Playboy a few months back...

A son is preparing for his wedding day, and being busy, asks his father for help.  "Dad, can you take this list and invite all 155 of my friends to the wedding".
"No problem son", replies the Dad, "I'll take care of it".
The wedding day arrives, and the nervous groom looks out to only see 14 of his friends in attendance.  Irritated, he yells at his dad, "I told you to invite my friends, why did you fail to do this for me?"
The dad calmly looks at his son and says,  "Son, I called everyone on your list and told them that you had something important on this day/time that they needed to help you with."   "These are your friends that showed up..."


/not on FB
//know who my friends really are
 
2013-05-09 06:57:24 PM
Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

i16.photobucket.com
 
2013-05-09 06:57:55 PM
Probably designed by the same person who decided late last week that we needed to have shiatloads of spam posted in our Newsfeed.

Really trying my patience with FB.
 
2013-05-09 06:58:11 PM
 I still use facebook to keep up with my friends daily.  The full site on my PC and the mobile site on my smartphone.  But the direction that facebook has been going in the past year tells me that, within the next year I'll find the site so useless that I'll stop using it.

I guess my friends will have to fark off.
 
2013-05-09 06:59:12 PM
If you'd like this post to appear in the comment thread, it will only cost you $1.  If you'd like it to always be on top, it's only $5!

Otherwise, your post will appear in a invisible, unclickable trashbin in the sidebar.
 
2013-05-09 06:59:14 PM

Amidala: Super Chronic: I really don't understand what some of these tech companies are thinking.  Basically, at this point, there are five behemoths in the tech world: Apple, Microsoft, Amazon, Google and Facebook.  All of them do different things and it's just fine that way.  But all of them make occasional half-assed attempts to intrude on each other's turf for no apparent reason.  In other sectors, companies tend to focus on what they do well.  In the tech sector, there seems to be this attitude of "if it's tech-related, we need to own it."

Simply doing what they do well now will mean the companies will risk becoming large irrelevant in the future. And the future appears to be mobile devices. Smartphones sales already exceed sales for laptops and desktops. Tablets sales will soon surpass laptops and desktops. For the tech companies, they must be able to make money off the mobile devices otherwise someone else will. Only a handful of companies use IBM's OS now; Mircosoft maybe in the same position in a few years if they can't figure out how to sell Windows Phone or RT.


I got no problem with hardware companies making the newest and latest hardware, software companies improving and updating their software, and e-commerce companies adapting to both of these changes.  Facebook would be well-served to concentrate on its apps for the phones that are already out there.  Manufacturing new phones isn't a battle they can expect to win, any more than Microsoft can expect to with with Bing and the Surface.
 
2013-05-09 06:59:52 PM

Mentat: xenophon10k: cannotsuggestaname: and why does this surprise anyone?

Seriously. The ad campaign boils down to "Now you can be an even bigger douchebag during social events."

I can't believe they thought that message would spur sales.

Still doesn't match the passive-aggressive douchebaggery of Windows 8/Windows Phone/Bing commercials.


Okay the Surface and Bing ones are awful but the W8 and WP8 ones are okay. The WP8 latest ad(iPhone and Sg3 users fighting) reminds me of Engadget threads.
 
2013-05-09 07:00:22 PM
I only use Facebook because I have an organization site linked to it.  I mostly use Twitter now.
 
2013-05-09 07:14:44 PM

Super Chronic: Amidala: Super Chronic: I really don't understand what some of these tech companies are thinking.  Basically, at this point, there are five behemoths in the tech world: Apple, Microsoft, Amazon, Google and Facebook.  All of them do different things and it's just fine that way.  But all of them make occasional half-assed attempts to intrude on each other's turf for no apparent reason.  In other sectors, companies tend to focus on what they do well.  In the tech sector, there seems to be this attitude of "if it's tech-related, we need to own it."

Simply doing what they do well now will mean the companies will risk becoming large irrelevant in the future. And the future appears to be mobile devices. Smartphones sales already exceed sales for laptops and desktops. Tablets sales will soon surpass laptops and desktops. For the tech companies, they must be able to make money off the mobile devices otherwise someone else will. Only a handful of companies use IBM's OS now; Mircosoft maybe in the same position in a few years if they can't figure out how to sell Windows Phone or RT.

I got no problem with hardware companies making the newest and latest hardware, software companies improving and updating their software, and e-commerce companies adapting to both of these changes.  Facebook would be well-served to concentrate on its apps for the phones that are already out there.  Manufacturing new phones isn't a battle they can expect to win, any more than Microsoft can expect to with with Bing and the Surface.


You're probably right that Bing can't compete with Google Search. But remember that Microsoft had a search engine before google was popular so Microsoft had a chance with search.

As for Facebook, they need to figure out how to make money on phones and the money is in the advertising, not the apps. If they show ads with Android or iPhone, Facebook has to use Google or Apple's ad engine and not their own and Facebook can't charge its rates. Facebook becomes just another app.
 
2013-05-09 07:15:24 PM

Popcorn Johnny: Pointy Tail of Satan: I'm been an IT guy since the days of core memory, and I wouldn't be caught dead using Facebook. Or Twitter. Or any other social meeting site (Fark and Liveleak excepted). I'd rather listen to the screeching of nails on a chalkboard.

Try reading a book instead. You might actually enjoy it.

I'm on Le Mort de Arthur now by Sir Thomas Malory. Tristram is kicking ass! Even if he is from Cornwall.

I bet you don't even own a TV.


I don't. The plus of a vivid imagination is that books are like movies. The minus is that movies and TV are like terrible books.
 
2013-05-09 07:16:01 PM

gingerjet: Pointy Tail of Satan: I'm been an IT guy since the days of core memory, and I wouldn't be caught dead using Facebook. Or Twitter. Or any other social meeting site (Fark and Liveleak excepted). I'd rather listen to the screeching of nails on a chalkboard.

Try reading a book instead. You might actually enjoy it.

I'm on Le Mort de Arthur now by Sir Thomas Malory. Tristram is kicking ass! Even if he is from Cornwall.

Some of us can deal with average activities like checking facebook, reading a book, and tying our shoes during any given day without completely freaking out.




Nah, you facebookers are crazy and look like morans, always checking your facebook.

/only reads non-fiction
 
2013-05-09 07:16:30 PM
I'll stick with Google+....hey, stop laughing.  It's actually quite useful to follow news and tech sites, and since the odds of anyone you know actually using it are slim, you don't have to deal with old girlfriends, barely remembered people from highschool or college, and god forbid coworkers chasing you down.
 
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