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(Mandatory)   I lost track of time because Kevin Spacey crapped in my gas tank   (mandatory.com) divider line 30
    More: Amusing, Kevin Spacey  
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10412 clicks; posted to Main » on 09 May 2013 at 1:37 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-05-09 12:40:50 PM
At least he didn't try to kill you. CSB: Me and Kevin were hanging out last night, just shooting the sh*t, when the Voice came on. So I'm all like "let's change the channel, this show sucks" and he's all like "You're kidding me, right? I love Adam Levine" and I told him he was being gay and next thing I know I'm waking up in the hospital. He stopped by to say he was sorry and if I pressed charges or mentioned that he was acting homosexual he would strangle me to death with my IV cord.

Dude is a f*cking maniac.
 
2013-05-09 12:49:06 PM
You're never going to believe this: A triceratops named Penelope came on me!
 
2013-05-09 12:53:51 PM
ll-media.extratv.com

I believe it.
 
2013-05-09 01:24:18 PM
Yeah, that would throw me off too.
 
2013-05-09 01:43:21 PM
Holy shiat, the little Asian kid from Indiana Jones slept with my uncle!
 
2013-05-09 01:47:01 PM
Anything......YOUR MOM....Anything else
 
2013-05-09 01:51:10 PM
Is it put together by manatee's?
 
2013-05-09 01:52:59 PM
Blimey! Sorry I'm late gov'nha, Mayor McCheese pulled me over in a stolen cop car and demanded fellatio!
 
2013-05-09 01:57:41 PM
So I was minding my business and Boom! The Ghost of Hitler spin-kicked me in the collarbone.
 
2013-05-09 01:57:49 PM
Don't blame me, but your mom tried to seduce me.

Kinda your fault, really. :P
 
2013-05-09 02:00:13 PM
I ran out of gas. I had a flat tire. I didn't have enough money for cab fare. My tux didn't come back from the cleaners. An old friend came in from out of town. Someone stole my car. There was an earthquake. A terrible flood! LOCUSTS! IT WASN'T MY FAULT, I SWEAR TO GOD!
 
2013-05-09 02:01:52 PM
Really? No one else clicked on this link hoping Spacey had an inappropriate moment with a car?
 
2013-05-09 02:08:45 PM
Beg ya a thousand pardons but Godzilla ran me over with a diesel backhoe.
 
2013-05-09 02:09:39 PM

Sojianna: Really? No one else clicked on this link hoping Spacey had an inappropriate moment with a car?


I did.  I was thinking what amazing crapping ability one must have to shiat directly into a gas tank.
 
2013-05-09 02:26:14 PM
I couldn't go because the entire Roman Empire died in front of me.
 
2013-05-09 02:28:33 PM
the other night I was reading the Lorax to my kids.  As I read it aloud I thought, "this would be so much better if it was read by Kevin Spacy".
 
2013-05-09 02:28:48 PM
See... the problem here is that... my little brother, this morning, got his arm caught in the microwave, and uh... my grandmother dropped acid and she freaked out, and hijacked a school bus full of... penguins, so it's kind of a family crisis... so come back later? Great.
t3.gstatic.com
 
2013-05-09 02:39:56 PM

Professor Science: I ran out of gas. I had a flat tire. I didn't have enough money for cab fare. My tux didn't come back from the cleaners. An old friend came in from out of town. Someone stole my car. There was an earthquake. A terrible flood! LOCUSTS! IT WASN'T MY FAULT, I SWEAR TO GOD!


I just watched that little bit of awesome last night!
 
2013-05-09 02:45:54 PM
I was dead at the time! I was on the moon!

// with Steve
// better not be obscure, like the First Battalion, Transvestite Brigade
 
2013-05-09 03:06:29 PM

blatz514: Holy shiat, the little Asian kid from Indiana Jones slept with my uncle!


i.imgur.com

"Lady only here because she humping director."
 
2013-05-09 03:08:19 PM

Dr Dreidel: better not be obscure, like the First Battalion, Transvestite Brigade


Fear not, nothing from Mr. Izzard is obscure on Fark.
 
2013-05-09 03:38:48 PM

royone: See... the problem here is that... my little brother, this morning, got his arm caught in the microwave, and uh... my grandmother dropped acid and she freaked out, and hijacked a school bus full of... penguins, so it's kind of a family crisis... so come back later? Great.


This is pure snow. Any idea what the street value of this is?!

/2 dollars
 
2013-05-09 03:47:08 PM
He is supposed to be Turkish. Some say his father was German. Nobody believed he was real. Nobody ever saw him or knew anybody that ever worked directly for him, but to hear Kobayashi tell it, anybody could have worked for Soze. You never knew. That was his power.
 
2013-05-09 06:41:28 PM
spacey did that to me one time.  i lost track of time.  what time is it by the way?
 
2013-05-09 09:07:46 PM
www.wearysloth.com
Damn you, Kirgo!
 
2013-05-09 11:15:50 PM
Sorry I'm late, but Raiden from Mortal Kombat hid my Trapper Keeper.


/Raiden Wins
//Flawless Victory
 
2013-05-09 11:24:23 PM
if only that list could be made to auto-generate
 
2013-05-09 11:41:04 PM
and noone has yet shooped this because...?
 
2013-05-10 07:38:01 AM
Sorry I'm late, but the offensive line of the '76 Dallas Cowboys kept telling me knock knock jokes.
 
2013-05-10 08:02:53 AM
Damn you Keyser Soze!
 
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