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(Daily Mail)   Kate Moss poses nude for ad, and Farkettes, now that most of the male Farkers are gone, what kind of present should I buy my wife for her first mother's day?   (dailymail.co.uk ) divider line
    More: Cool, st. tropez, Kate Moss, Farkettes, sunless tanning, Farkers, fashion icon, smoulders, Rachel Weisz  
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11190 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 09 May 2013 at 9:40 AM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



102 Comments     (+0 »)
 
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2013-05-09 08:33:51 AM  
I like the tan-line look, so meh for no tan-lines on Kate.
 
2013-05-09 09:01:59 AM  
I'm not attracted to the 10-year-old boy look on women, but have at it, subby.
 
2013-05-09 09:11:01 AM  
What, you want real advice?
Give her whatever she wants. If she likes sparkly things, get her something sparkly.
Definitely a mushy card.
And make her her favorite food. Don't bother with a restaurant. Give her a nice candlelit dinner at home while she's suckling that newborn babe of yours.
 
2013-05-09 09:31:18 AM  
New tits.
 
2013-05-09 09:44:04 AM  
Never understood the appeal of Kate Moss. There are plenty of drop-dead gorgeous models I wish I looked like; she always seemed flat-faced and uninteresting to me. And yet people rave about her beauty.
 
2013-05-09 09:45:36 AM  
Isn't she like a hundred years old old now?
 
2013-05-09 09:46:49 AM  
My wife asked foe the Doctor Who gift set from ThinkGeek. Sure beats flowers and chocolate.

So yeah. Find out what she wants and get that.
 
2013-05-09 09:47:57 AM  
 
2013-05-09 09:48:17 AM  
A tubal ligation.
 
2013-05-09 09:53:07 AM  
PsyLord...You owe me a cup of yogurt.
 
2013-05-09 09:54:10 AM  
My wife isn't a mother. I dont have to buy her something, do I?!

/it's our first year
 
2013-05-09 09:55:02 AM  
Doesn't Kate Moss pose nude more often than most porn stars?
 
2013-05-09 09:56:00 AM  
Occasionally, there will be a commercial on TV, "Get her what she really wants this Valentines day. This matched set of earrings and pendants is only $5600..."

Almost every time, after one of those is over, she will turn to me and say, "I swear to god, if you decide to spend that much money on me it had better start with tickets to Paris and a small walk-up room in the Latin Quarter."

So that's what I got her. It cost a lot less than the diamonds, and she LOVED it.

I guess what I'm saying is, if you know her, you already know what she wants.
 
2013-05-09 09:57:03 AM  
They did some good photoshopping to hide all the track marks.
 
2013-05-09 09:58:02 AM  
Why would you do such a thing unless your wife is also your mother? I just don't get this. Is it just an American thing, or have I been a horrible husband? After all there is the anniversary, valentines, birthday, christmas, and if she wants a mother's day thing it better be from the kids.
 
2013-05-09 09:59:02 AM  

INeedAName: My wife isn't a mother. I dont have to buy her something, do I?!

/it's our first year


You could get her something and make her cry.
You could not get her something and make her cry.
Either way you lose.
FROM NOW ON YOU WILL ALWAYS LOSE
 
2013-05-09 10:00:08 AM  
Male farker here, don't care about her.  And do people actually buy things on Mother's Day?  I thought it was a day for doing nice things for mom, and perhaps making her something in art class, if you're still in grade school.
 
2013-05-09 10:01:06 AM  
www.bedbathandbeyond.com
I just saved you a click.
 
2013-05-09 10:02:22 AM  
I sent mine an Amazon gift card so she could buy some eBooks (mommy-porn 50 shades of grey) for her Kindle.
 
2013-05-09 10:03:01 AM  
Candlesticks make a nice gift.
 
2013-05-09 10:04:10 AM  

limeyfellow: Why would you do such a thing unless your wife is also your mother? I just don't get this. Is it just an American thing, or have I been a horrible husband? After all there is the anniversary, valentines, birthday, christmas, and if she wants a mother's day thing it better be from the kids.


Its typically done for the first few years when the kid is too young to get her something. After that, you transition to buying something and saying its from the kids. Eventually, if you do things right they'll manage to accomplish it on their own.
 
2013-05-09 10:06:31 AM  
Not as epic as the "Take no prisoners" headline, but the seasonal twist was nice, Subby.
 
2013-05-09 10:12:39 AM  

Alphax: Male farker here, don't care about her.  And do people actually buy things on Mother's Day?  I thought it was a day for doing nice things for mom, and perhaps making her something in art class, if you're still in grade school.


That's kind of the ebb and flow in my marriage.

When we don't have much time it ends up being gifts.  When we do have time it's doing nice things.
 
2013-05-09 10:14:22 AM  
Don't buy something, *do* something.
 
2013-05-09 10:19:41 AM  

edip1976: Candlesticks make a nice gift.


Just don't give them to her in the Conservatory.
 
2013-05-09 10:19:43 AM  
I don't get this whole Kate Moss thing.  Do not want.
 
2013-05-09 10:20:14 AM  

INeedAName: My wife isn't a mother. I dont have to buy her something, do I?!

/it's our first year


Is it called "wife's day"?   No.  Duh.
 
2013-05-09 10:24:45 AM  
Hanging plant, something colorful that will last well into Summer.  Ask for advice where you make your purchase for I know not what region of the world you live in.  All that crap is on sale at Home Depot though so it could be beneficial to do a little research on your own.
 
2013-05-09 10:25:38 AM  

dletter: INeedAName: My wife isn't a mother. I dont have to buy her something, do I?!

/it's our first year

Is it called "wife's day"?   No.  Duh.


It should be called "If you don't do something with the Kids' name on it you're going to hear about it six months from now when you want to go play Battlefield 3 on the computer" day.

So yes, you buy her shiat with the kids' name on it.
 
2013-05-09 10:25:53 AM  
For Grandma, I am gathering as many of the family as I can and we will have a big meal at her house (because this is her second favorite thing in the entire world).  I will cook the entire meal and clean up afterwards so she doesn't need to do anything (this is her first favorite thing in the entire world).  My Grandmother will be SO happy about this. So far, we have all six living children and 29 of the grandchildren, and 14 of the great-grandchildren coming.
Rinse and repeat for her birthday and Thanksgiving.

For Mom, I am taking her for a spa day on Saturday (mani's, pedi's, facials, the works).  Then she will get relax and enjoy the family on Sunday with Grams.

So, that is what makes the Moms in my life happy.
 
2013-05-09 10:30:37 AM  
Here you go, subby: nswf
 
2013-05-09 10:48:19 AM  
She's hot.

Deal with it.

(GIF sunglasses land on my face.)
 
2013-05-09 10:55:03 AM  
Unless your wife is a mother, nothing.  this is not a "all females get gifts" occasion.  It's for mothers.

some ideas:  if this is her first, then you obviously have a baby.  make the gift from the baby.  My first child bought my wife a $400 tissot watch, and my second child bought her a necklace and some rings.

Also good - childrens books dealing with love, signed by baby to Mommy.

Also good - get a good picture of the kid, roll some ink onto the feet and stamp it on some nice paper, frame it for a mothers day present from the baby.

if you want one from you, make it a 'ladies night out' certificate where she gets to go out and pretend she's not a mommy for one night, you're on baby duty.
 
2013-05-09 10:55:13 AM  

INeedAName: My wife isn't a mother. I dont have to buy her something, do I?!

/it's our first year


She will never be your mother, so you never have to buy her anything.

Same to subby

But just in case, make her dinner.
 
2013-05-09 11:07:03 AM  

silo123j: What, you want real advice?
Give her whatever she wants. If she likes sparkly things, get her something sparkly.
Definitely a mushy card.
And make her her favorite food. Don't bother with a restaurant. Give her a nice candlelit dinner at home while she's suckling that newborn babe of yours.


Or, if the baby is newborn (or very young), some time to herself would probably be welcome.
Send her out with a friend to the movies.  Maybe a spa treatment.  Or a massage.

Sometimes just a nap is the best gift you can give.
 
2013-05-09 11:08:36 AM  

riverwalk barfly: INeedAName: My wife isn't a mother. I dont have to buy her something, do I?!

/it's our first year

She will never be your mother, so you never have to buy her anything.


What if they get divorced, and then she marries his father?
 
2013-05-09 11:11:04 AM  
Does it show her "goods", or is she "naked" under partial clothing or well placed hands and arms?
 
2013-05-09 11:11:06 AM  
We got a new charcoal grill for "mothers day" a few weeks ago, going to buy some cards that the kids can give her (the are 3 and 1) and make sure she can relax on Sunday and that will be it.
 
2013-05-09 11:13:48 AM  

Tyrone Slothrop: riverwalk barfly: INeedAName: My wife isn't a mother. I dont have to buy her something, do I?!

/it's our first year

She will never be your mother, so you never have to buy her anything.

What if they get divorced, and then she marries his father?


valid point.   as long as he still gets to fark her.  Unless she's nasty (not in the good way) in that class no more father's day cards for you.
 
2013-05-09 11:19:25 AM  

weirdneighbour: Does it show her "goods", or is she "naked" under partial clothing or well placed hands and arms?


her "goods" aren't that good. it's the well-placed arms and the right angle, but we're not missing much.
 
2013-05-09 11:20:21 AM  

INeedAName: My wife isn't a mother. I dont have to buy her something, do I?!


just practicing eh?
 
2013-05-09 11:27:54 AM  
Anyone else think she has a weird face? Don't give me any Studman shiat, she has a weird face.
 
2013-05-09 11:30:48 AM  

Incorrigible Astronaut: I'm not attracted to the 10-year-old boy look on women, but have at it, subby.


I don't know any 10-year-old boys with B-cups. At least, no 10-year-old boys that are rail thin.

/Plenty of 10-year-old boys with B-cups that are already heavier than Kate Moss at a foot and a half shorter.
 
2013-05-09 11:35:07 AM  

Incorrigible Astronaut: I'm not attracted to the 10-year-old boy look on women, but have at it, subby.


If you think thats what a 10 year old boy looks like I have some bad news for you.
 
2013-05-09 11:38:58 AM  
y'all can say what you want.  i always thought she was pretty.
 
2013-05-09 11:44:23 AM  
Saw the first photo, love the pose, but it's airbrushed/fake to the point that I don't like it
 
2013-05-09 11:57:11 AM  
Buy a card from the store that has something, short sweet and nice. Then add something in pen about how you and the baby love/appreciate/etc her. Then grab a little washable finger paint put the kid's hand in it and leave an imprint on the card next to where you sign it.

Then get a babysitter and take her out to a movie and/or dinner.

Instant sexy time either that night or the next morning.
 
2013-05-09 12:13:14 PM  
Subby... It's called her snatch and you eat it. That is what you give a woman
 
2013-05-09 12:27:32 PM  
ha! nice spin on stale meme subby.

.5 internets are now yours
 
2013-05-09 12:42:25 PM  
A new vacuum cleaner.
 
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