If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(CBS Dallas/Ft. Worth)   Teacha The Hutt charged with sex crimes involving a 13 year-old student who texted her and said he had a problem with his penis, and since she's the school sex-ed teacher, she promptly administered a thorough oral examination   (dfw.cbslocal.com) divider line 108
    More: Dumbass, Cedar Hill Independent School District, Cedar Hill, sex crimes, alumni, middle schools, teachers  
•       •       •

18695 clicks; posted to Main » on 09 May 2013 at 5:55 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



108 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread
 
2013-05-08 10:31:37 PM
Sweet mutton chops, lady.

/sweet mutton chops lady. Hiya!
 
2013-05-08 10:34:35 PM
ook
 
2013-05-08 10:40:22 PM

PapaChester: Sweet mutton chops, lady.


Yeah because if she waxed those farking Elvis chops off, she'd be a real looker!
 
2013-05-08 10:40:36 PM
Teacha the Hutt, eh?  Now THIS I can fap to!
 
2013-05-08 10:42:32 PM
Hutt.. Damn auto-correct!

/subby
 
2013-05-08 10:50:41 PM
I wouldn't have hit that even as a hormonally charged teenager.
 
2013-05-08 11:51:09 PM
"She was a great teacher. Always friendly, smiling, willing to help."


Clearly.
 
2013-05-08 11:52:52 PM
cbsdallas.files.wordpress.com
sharetv.org
 
2013-05-08 11:53:07 PM
cdn.dejanseo.com.au
 
2013-05-08 11:57:27 PM
A fellow coach told police that an eighth grader was reportedly bragging about his sexual relationship with Mints.

No harm done, then.

From her page on the school's website:

Every Health student needs the following items...

1. Green Folder
2. Colored Pencils


Add:
3. A weener
 
2013-05-09 12:01:53 AM
Oral sex and Mints. There's a joke there.
 
2013-05-09 12:09:12 AM
cbsdallas.files.wordpress.com

Teacher Marlena Wafer Thin Mints
 
2013-05-09 12:20:16 AM
 
2013-05-09 12:23:40 AM
I'd like to know what problem he told her he was having with his penis. Damn news stories never get the important details.
 
2013-05-09 12:29:18 AM

Pocket Ninja: I'd like to know what problem he told her he was having with his penis. Damn news stories never get the important details.


Kid's 13.. He was probably getting wood just thinking about....well....anything, and got worried enough to have Hutt take a look.
 
2013-05-09 12:39:33 AM

Pocket Ninja: I'd like to know what problem he told her he was having with his penis. Damn news stories never get the important details.


The 5 Ws are simply a long lost journalistic concept, it seems
 
2013-05-09 01:13:25 AM
She's fat and ugly. Her sentence should reflect that.
 
2013-05-09 01:14:51 AM
She's very refreshing.
 
2013-05-09 01:15:06 AM

unlikely: She's fat and ugly. Her sentence should reflect that.


I'm pretty sure that's a life sentence right there
 
2013-05-09 01:34:03 AM

MaudlinMutantMollusk: unlikely: She's fat and ugly. Her sentence should reflect that.

I'm pretty sure that's a life sentence right there


In these Teacher-Sex cases, there are two sentencing standards. Hot Young Female teacher and Everyone Else. All I'm saying is that this one is so VERY "Everyone Else".
 
2013-05-09 02:16:25 AM
Having that woman teach sex ed is still an abstinence-only education.
 
2013-05-09 03:26:16 AM
... a problem he told her he was having with his penis.  The student says Mints told him she would need to see it and asked him to meet her at school to show it to her.

This teacher is my kind of scum, fearless and inventive.
 
2013-05-09 03:52:47 AM
That's not a woman, right?

That's a thumb with a face painted on it...
 
2013-05-09 04:15:18 AM
i1048.photobucket.com
 
2013-05-09 04:44:20 AM
She looks a little Downsy.
 
2013-05-09 05:31:25 AM
I'd always wanted a blowjob from John Candy, just because nobody would believe me.
 
2013-05-09 05:34:06 AM

hardinparamedic: That's not a woman, right?

That's a thumb with a face painted on it...


a very very saggy thumb.
 
2013-05-09 05:57:57 AM
I'm sure she cleans up nice. All mugshots are unflattering.
 
2013-05-09 05:58:27 AM

log_jammin: hardinparamedic: That's not a woman, right?

That's a thumb with a face painted on it...

a very very saggy thumb.



content.internetvideoarchive.com
"Sort of want"
 
2013-05-09 06:00:21 AM
Mints or Mince?
 
2013-05-09 06:01:33 AM
Why the fark would a student be texting a teacher for any reason?

/went to high school in the 80s.
 
2013-05-09 06:01:41 AM

sithon: She looks a little Downsy.


bingo
 
2013-05-09 06:02:46 AM
If she were hot there would be plenty of people who would have no problem with this.
 
2013-05-09 06:05:45 AM
Back in Greek and Roman times the 12 and up crowd would go to the local temple and fark a bunch of 20-50 year olds and they just called it Tuesday.
 
2013-05-09 06:07:52 AM
i.chzbgr.com
 
2013-05-09 06:10:46 AM

lewismarktwo: Back in Greek and Roman times the 12 and up crowd would go to the local temple baths and fark a bunch of 20-50 year olds men and they just called it Tuesday.


/FTFY
//or they'd just call it the Catholic Church
///or Republican caucus
 
2013-05-09 06:11:50 AM
Smoking Hot! and if you don't think so you're probably going out to reststops at night, if you get my drift.

Too sharp of knees?
/please
 
2013-05-09 06:13:29 AM

crab66: If she were hot there would be plenty of people who would have no problem with this.


of farking course.... just look at her. that poor kid is scarred for life. i don't think you get to have normal sex with a normal person ever again after sticking your pee-pee in that.
 
2013-05-09 06:15:51 AM

TemporarySanity: crab66: If she were hot there would be plenty of people who would have no problem with this.

of farking course.... just look at her. that poor kid is scarred for life. i don't think you get to have normal sex with a normal person ever again after sticking your pee-pee in that.


I can just imagine her vagina making slurping sounds as her male pupils draw near.
 
2013-05-09 06:19:50 AM
You came in that? You're braver than I thought.
 
2013-05-09 06:20:22 AM

dyhchong: TemporarySanity: crab66: If she were hot there would be plenty of people who would have no problem with this.

of farking course.... just look at her. that poor kid is scarred for life. i don't think you get to have normal sex with a normal person ever again after sticking your pee-pee in that.

I can just imagine her vagina making slurping sounds as her male pupils draw near.


politedissent.com
 
2013-05-09 06:24:51 AM
He probably heard "fat chicks give better head" and "older women are better in bed because of experience" and figured he'd hit the jackpot.
 
2013-05-09 06:24:53 AM
Marlena Mints

Oh come on. How is that not a stripper name?
Not that I'd want to see it strip, but really...
 
2013-05-09 06:24:55 AM
OH HELL NAW MAN!  I was as horny as the rest, but I would not have done that...ever.....
 
2013-05-09 06:25:23 AM
She's better looking when she's done up, but then just about anyone looks better when you compare it to a mugshot photo.

crimeblog.dallasnews.comcbsdallas.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-05-09 06:26:10 AM

Oldiron_79: You came in that? You're braver than I thought.


Holy crap. Coffee buning my nose.
Hilarious and painful.
 
2013-05-09 06:26:22 AM

Battlestar Girlactica: She's better looking when she's done up, but then just about anyone looks better when you compare it to a mugshot photo.

[crimeblog.dallasnews.com image 367x397][cbsdallas.files.wordpress.com image 300x225]


Fat girls give better head because they are hungry.  She looks like she has quite the appetite.
 
2013-05-09 06:28:09 AM
THATS SICK.
 
2013-05-09 06:36:18 AM

unlikely: She's fat and ugly. Her sentence should reflect that.


It will, by her having any sentence at all.
 
2013-05-09 06:40:29 AM

lewismarktwo: Back in Greek and Roman times the 12 and up crowd would go to the local temple and fark a bunch of 20-50 year olds and they just called it Tuesday.


So that's what people mean when they say "when in Rome.."?
 
2013-05-09 06:42:01 AM

mike_d85: Oldiron_79: You came in that? You're braver than I thought.

Holy crap. Coffee buning my nose.
Hilarious and painful.


Cant say Ive ever laughed hot coffee through nose but I can see that being bad.
 
2013-05-09 06:46:50 AM
Smoking hot!
 
2013-05-09 06:51:33 AM
In before violent rape fantas..... Oh it was a female sex offender so there won't be any. If this was a man there would be 3 pages callin for him to get raped for the rest of his life
 
2013-05-09 06:51:52 AM

phrawgh: lewismarktwo: Back in Greek and Roman times the 12 and up crowd would go to the local temple baths and farkget farked by a bunch of 20-50 year olds men and they just called it Tuesday.

/FTFY
//or they'd just call it the Catholic Church
///or Republican caucus


FTFY too.
 
2013-05-09 06:53:29 AM

Captain Dan: ... a problem he told her he was having with his penis.  The student says Mints told him she would need to see it and asked him to meet her at school to show it to her.

This teacher is my kind of scum, fearless and inventive.


Oh, I'm afraid she's uglier than a preop transexual.
 
2013-05-09 06:58:32 AM
24.media.tumblr.com
 
2013-05-09 07:05:14 AM
Mama June?
 
2013-05-09 07:07:30 AM
A fellow coach told police that an eighth grader was reportedly bragging about his sexual relationship with Mints.

Bragging?? About her?!
 
2013-05-09 07:10:44 AM

Battlestar Girlactica: She's better looking when she's done up, but then just about anyone looks better when you compare it to a mugshot photo.

[crimeblog.dallasnews.com image 367x397][cbsdallas.files.wordpress.com image 300x225]


Still NO!
 
2013-05-09 07:17:19 AM

sithon: She looks a little Downsy.


Adds a new twist to the Debbie Downer character....
 
2013-05-09 07:20:13 AM
I don't see what the issue is.  She was the health teacher and he had a problem with his penis (maybe a snake bite?) that couldn't wait until penis inspection day.  Why are we stopping teachers from doing their jobs?
 
2013-05-09 07:20:32 AM

RobSeace: A fellow coach told police that an eighth grader was reportedly bragging about his sexual relationship with Mints.

Bragging?? About her?!


"Guess what guys. you know how you put mints in your mouth?"
 
2013-05-09 07:35:23 AM
When eight hundred pounds you are, look so good you will not.
 
2013-05-09 07:39:48 AM

Nurglitch: When eight hundred pounds you are, look so good you will not.


how can anyone GET that FAT.  if i eat like an entire large pizza i'm like "NOO MORE PLEASE NO MORE DELICIOUS HUNGRY HOWIES"
 
2013-05-09 07:40:21 AM

Pocket Ninja: I'd like to know what problem he told her he was having with his penis. Damn news stories never get the important details.


.

It kept getting rigamortis when he saw her, meaning it died, but she thought it was an erection and whelp the rest as they say is history
 
2013-05-09 07:48:31 AM

Baryogenesis: Why are we stopping teachers from doing their blowjobs?


FTFY
 
2013-05-09 07:51:14 AM
Hell no.
 
2013-05-09 07:53:39 AM
hostr.co
 
2013-05-09 08:00:06 AM
There once was an ugly barnacle...
 
2013-05-09 08:05:23 AM
Hey Marlena, "Goony goo goo!"
 
2013-05-09 08:08:10 AM
What did she coach?  Competitive eating?
 
2013-05-09 08:15:39 AM

dyhchong: TemporarySanity: crab66: If she were hot there would be plenty of people who would have no problem with this.

of farking course.... just look at her. that poor kid is scarred for life. i don't think you get to have normal sex with a normal person ever again after sticking your pee-pee in that.

I can just imagine her vagina making slurping sounds as her male pupils draw near.


goddammit. Why  do I read this when I am drinking coffee?
 
2013-05-09 08:22:56 AM

DanZero: [cbsdallas.files.wordpress.com image 640x480]

Teacher Marlena Wafer Thin Mints


I award you 1 innernets
 
2013-05-09 08:25:19 AM
For once, headline is brutally honest.


/WTF is going on here?
 
2013-05-09 08:26:44 AM
Come on, who doesn't enjoy a little Mint mouth wash?
 
2013-05-09 08:28:40 AM
Come or not come -- there is no try!
 
2013-05-09 08:29:32 AM
Maybe she thought he had been bitten by a snake and was sucking the poison out. That white gooy poison.
 
2013-05-09 08:30:40 AM

wambu: For once, headline is brutally honest.


/WTF is going on here?


Well, to be honest, the 'cute' headline that went red reeled me in...hook...line....and sinker.

It seemed like cute meant cute for a few days there.  Nope.  Headfirst into the Sarlacc.
 
2013-05-09 08:43:17 AM

biyaaatci: Hey, my town finally got in on the action today too:  http://www.wandtv.com/story/22201367/urbana-teacher-accused-of-sexual - relationship-with-student


The irony of this is, go back to the 1970s, I can name 3 teacher/student encounters that today would have been felonies, back then was just run of the mill joked about stuff. One cost the guy his job, but one of the other ones waited til she was 18 and graduated, then she married the guy, a teacher at Champaign Central.

And don't get me started on 18 year old high school seniors dating 13 or 14 year olds.


//Champaign native. A long time ago, haven't lived there now in 20 yrs.
 
2013-05-09 08:47:43 AM
You see Meg Mints, you're what they call a "practice girl"
 
2013-05-09 08:55:50 AM
That woman sure likes a little dick in her mouth.
 
2013-05-09 08:57:49 AM
BRING ME SOLO AND THE NOOKIE.
 
2013-05-09 09:06:52 AM

Oldiron_79: You came in that? You're braver than I thought.


I guffawed,  +1
 
2013-05-09 09:12:21 AM

Generation_D: biyaaatci: Hey, my town finally got in on the action today too:  http://www.wandtv.com/story/22201367/urbana-teacher-accused-of-sexual - relationship-with-student

The irony of this is, go back to the 1970s, I can name 3 teacher/student encounters that today would have been felonies, back then was just run of the mill joked about stuff. One cost the guy his job, but one of the other ones waited til she was 18 and graduated, then she married the guy, a teacher at Champaign Central.

And don't get me started on 18 year old high school seniors dating 13 or 14 year olds.


//Champaign native. A long time ago, haven't lived there now in 20 yrs.


Oh, it happened at Central in the '90s as well.  I was talking about the Jabba and arrest angle.  During my senior year we had an influx of new teachers who were all 22-24 and the women were pretty hot.  They were hanging out at our parties and buying us beer and buying pot from my friends.  It was kind of messed up, but somehow it worked.  We all learned a lot that year.
 
2013-05-09 09:42:58 AM

biyaaatci: Generation_D: biyaaatci: Hey, my town finally got in on the action today too:  http://www.wandtv.com/story/22201367/urbana-teacher-accused-of-sexual - relationship-with-student

The irony of this is, go back to the 1970s, I can name 3 teacher/student encounters that today would have been felonies, back then was just run of the mill joked about stuff. One cost the guy his job, but one of the other ones waited til she was 18 and graduated, then she married the guy, a teacher at Champaign Central.

And don't get me started on 18 year old high school seniors dating 13 or 14 year olds.


//Champaign native. A long time ago, haven't lived there now in 20 yrs.

Oh, it happened at Central in the '90s as well.  I was talking about the Jabba and arrest angle.  During my senior year we had an influx of new teachers who were all 22-24 and the women were pretty hot.  They were hanging out at our parties and buying us beer and buying pot from my friends.  It was kind of messed up, but somehow it worked.  We all learned a lot that year.


HA. yep, all this worked out mostly fine until the internet got involved. I can see you were scarred for life for the experience...
 
2013-05-09 09:49:04 AM

Generation_D: biyaaatci: Generation_D: biyaaatci: Hey, my town finally got in on the action today too:  http://www.wandtv.com/story/22201367/urbana-teacher-accused-of-sexual - relationship-with-student

The irony of this is, go back to the 1970s, I can name 3 teacher/student encounters that today would have been felonies, back then was just run of the mill joked about stuff. One cost the guy his job, but one of the other ones waited til she was 18 and graduated, then she married the guy, a teacher at Champaign Central.

And don't get me started on 18 year old high school seniors dating 13 or 14 year olds.


//Champaign native. A long time ago, haven't lived there now in 20 yrs.

Oh, it happened at Central in the '90s as well.  I was talking about the Jabba and arrest angle.  During my senior year we had an influx of new teachers who were all 22-24 and the women were pretty hot.  They were hanging out at our parties and buying us beer and buying pot from my friends.  It was kind of messed up, but somehow it worked.  We all learned a lot that year.

HA. yep, all this worked out mostly fine until the internet got involved. I can see you were scarred for life for the experience...


At least half the stuff that any of us did in the 70's would have landed us all in serious trouble by today's rules; then it was just considered life experience or kids will be kids. I pity the teenagers now.
 
2013-05-09 09:50:03 AM

Baryogenesis: I don't see what the issue is.  She was the health teacher and he had a problem with his penis (maybe a snake bite?) that couldn't wait until penis inspection day.  Why are we stopping teachers from doing their jobs?


hftt.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-05-09 09:54:59 AM
These kids are too young irrespective of the hotness factor or lack thereof.  The question is how much permanent psychological scarring they'll have to deal with.

Now on the one end of the scale you have Debra LaFave...which creates an impossible situation for these boys as it will be like shooting heroin...they'll always be chasing that high.

On the other end of the scale, you have this teacher.  As they get older, they'll have to live with the fact that they got their first  hummer from Teacha the Hutt.  Now, they'll be tortured by the image of Teacha every time some girl puts their mouth on their penis causing them to go limp.

Of course, I'd rather be chasing the high of banging the hot teacher than being tortured by the memory of this beast blowing me.  That isn't to say I haven't gone whaling in the past (but nothing THIS hideous...my wingman would never let me go that far), but I was drinking so I don't remember the details.
 
2013-05-09 10:16:44 AM

slayer199: These kids are too young irrespective of the hotness factor or lack thereof.  The question is how much permanent psychological scarring they'll have to deal with.

Now on the one end of the scale you have Debra LaFave...which creates an impossible situation for these boys as it will be like shooting heroin...they'll always be chasing that high.

On the other end of the scale, you have this teacher.  As they get older, they'll have to live with the fact that they got their first  hummer from Teacha the Hutt.  Now, they'll be tortured by the image of Teacha every time some girl puts their mouth on their penis causing them to go limp.

Of course, I'd rather be chasing the high of banging the hot teacher than being tortured by the memory of this beast blowing me.  That isn't to say I haven't gone whaling in the past (but nothing THIS hideous...my wingman would never let me go that far), but I was drinking so I don't remember the details.


The horror, you banged an ugly girl before you were old enough to know any better. How will you ever live with yourself. How can you possibly learn from the experience that "discretion is the better part of valor" if you're so busy emo-ing out how horrible it was. Better just jump now and avoid years worth of mental anguish.


I'm in agreement with AbbeySomeone, I am so glad I got to grow up free-range, experience some nefarious stuff randomly and just learn from it without everything instantly being a national felony crime in a permanent database, or being recorded forever on the internet.
 
2013-05-09 10:24:16 AM
Give the kids a break.  She's what they call a 'practice girl'
 
2013-05-09 10:33:23 AM
I'm pretty sure I saw her on South Park.
 
2013-05-09 10:33:27 AM

Kim Jong B Illin: Give the kids a break.  She's what they call a 'practice girl'


media.tumblr.com
media.tumblr.com
media.tumblr.com
 
2013-05-09 10:38:29 AM
Lost it at "Teacha the Hutt"
 
2013-05-09 10:42:33 AM

Generation_D: The horror, you banged an ugly girl before you were old enough to know any better. How will you ever live with yourself. How can you possibly learn from the experience that "discretion is the better part of valor" if you're so busy emo-ing out how horrible it was. Better just jump now and avoid years worth of mental anguish.


I'm in agreement with AbbeySomeone, I am so glad I got to grow up free-range, experience some nefarious stuff randomly and just learn from it without everything instantly being a national felony crime in a permanent database, or being recorded forever on the internet.


cdn.glockforum.com

You're not new on Fark, so I can only assume you're being overly serious today.  Other than my first sentence (If the kid is 13, I don't care HOW hot the teacher is...that's too damn young), the rest of my post was an attempt at humor while highlighting how most people view these teacher sex scandals.  If the teacher is male, they shall be castrated and burned at the stake.  If the teacher is a hot female, good for the boys.  If the teacher is an ugly female, she should be burned at the stake.  If the teacher is female and the victim is female, giggity.
 
2013-05-09 11:02:49 AM
Back in my day, we had to bang the fatties uphill both ways, in the snow.  And that's the way we liked it.
 
2013-05-09 11:21:01 AM

crab66: If she were hot there would be plenty of people who would have no problem with this.


Someone is going to grow up knowing that they accepted a blow job from this creature.  That's an extra layer of hurt inflicted on this victim that wouldn't be there if she were hot.  And there's no reason for it!
 
2013-05-09 11:23:35 AM

Stoj: Back in my day, we had to bang the fatties uphill both ways, in the snow.  And that's the way we liked it.


Uh-huh, uh-huh...
 
2013-05-09 11:26:08 AM
"Teacher the Hutt"

I believe you mean, "Jabba the Slutt"  ;)
 
2013-05-09 11:45:58 AM

DanZero: [cbsdallas.files.wordpress.com image 640x480]

Teacher Marlena Wafer Thin Mints


Just one more waffer-theen mint, sir

(howling from remembering)

Boom!
 
2013-05-09 11:49:02 AM
cbsdallas.files.wordpress.com encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com
 
2013-05-09 01:18:23 PM
OH hell NO!
 
2013-05-09 02:10:03 PM
She wasn't trying to give oral sex. She was trying to eat it.
 
2013-05-09 02:30:18 PM

markie_farkie: PapaChester: Sweet mutton chops, lady.

Yeah because if she waxed those farking Elvis chops off, she'd be a real looker!


One could certainly look...
 
2013-05-09 03:04:31 PM

hardinparamedic: That's not a woman, right?

That's a thumb with a face painted on it...


memeblender.com
 
2013-05-09 03:12:30 PM
I'm gonna toss out a wild guess that the 'victim' is black.
 
2013-05-09 04:26:59 PM

Captain Dan: ... a problem he told her he was having with his penis.  The student says Mints told him she would need to see it and asked him to meet her at school to show it to her.

This teacher is my kind of scum, fearless and inventive.


In her defense, it's a pretty good pickup line. I'ma try that sometime.
 
2013-05-09 10:06:49 PM
Saw "Teacha the Hutt" in headline, knew exactly what I was getting in to, clicked anyway...

/The fark is wrong with me?
//The fark is wrong with me that I want to take a run at her anyway?
///Yes, I have been drinking; why do you ask?
 
2013-05-10 12:39:03 AM

IAMTHEINTARWEBS: Mama June?


THANK YOU!
 
Displayed 108 of 108 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report