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(The Atlantic)   FDA announces plans to investigate/regulate caffeine. FROM MY HOT, TWITCHING HANDS   (theatlantic.com) divider line 95
    More: Dumbass, FDA, Mental Health Services Administration, mass market, Utopia, deputy commissioner  
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4082 clicks; posted to Main » on 08 May 2013 at 9:09 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-05-08 09:43:11 AM  

fluffy2097: thornhill: Cigarettes should be banned, or at least, smokers should be in their own insurance pool so I don't have to pay for their lung cancer surgeries. 90% of lung cancer is due to smoking. If you want the freedom to smoke then you should accept the full health care costs of its effects.

UNIVERSAL HEALTHCARE FOR EVERYONE

IF YOU HAVE A VICE, NO HEALTHCARE FOR YOU!

THE DEMOCRATIC PARTY. FREEDOM TO DO WHATEVER YOU WANT AS LONG AS IT'S WHATEVER THEY SAY.


You're getting straw just everywhere. Think of the janitors, man.
 
2013-05-08 09:43:45 AM  
"For me, the more fundamental questions are whether it is appropriate to use foods that may be inherently attractive and accessible to children as the vehicles to deliver the stimulant caffeine"

You will never take away my:

s24.postimg.org
 
2013-05-08 09:43:47 AM  

RembrandtQEinstein: The more corrupt the government, the more numerous the laws.


Are you serious?
 
2013-05-08 09:44:15 AM  

vwarb: thornhill: Cigarettes should be banned, or at least, smokers should be in their own insurance pool so I don't have to pay for their lung cancer surgeries. 90% of lung cancer is due to smoking. If you want the freedom to smoke then you should accept the full health care costs of its effects.

If you want the freedom to climb mountains then you should accept the full health care costs of its effects when you break a leg.

If you want the freedom to eat fried food then you should accept the full health care costs of its effects when you have a heart attack.

Almost anything a person does will compromise their health in some way or another. You have vices that negatively impact your health as well. Also, when I'm dead at 50, you won't have to pay for my eye surgery and dentures and life support.

 Comparing these activities to willfully inhaling a carcinogen is a false equivalency.
 
2013-05-08 09:45:29 AM  

vwarb: thornhill: Cigarettes should be banned, or at least, smokers should be in their own insurance pool so I don't have to pay for their lung cancer surgeries. 90% of lung cancer is due to smoking. If you want the freedom to smoke then you should accept the full health care costs of its effects.

If you want the freedom to climb mountains then you should accept the full health care costs of its effects when you break a leg.

If you want the freedom to eat fried food then you should accept the full health care costs of its effects when you have a heart attack.


If mountain climbing caused people who weren't mountain climbing to break their legs, or if eating fried food caused others to have heart attacks, you might just have a point.

/I've got the lungs of a 60-year-old smoker.
//I haven't smoked a day in my life.
//I'm 33.
 
2013-05-08 09:46:14 AM  

thornhill: Comparing these activities to willfully inhaling a carcinogen is a false equivalency.


Risks are risks, even if their severity varies.
 
2013-05-08 09:46:46 AM  

thornhill: Comparing these activities to willfully inhaling a carcinogen is a false equivalency.


Okay, no snark, I'm genuinely curious about this. Why are activities that greatly increase your risk of a given medical problem vastly different in equivalence?
 
2013-05-08 09:46:58 AM  

IlGreven: /I've got the lungs of a 60-year-old smoker.
//I haven't smoked a day in my life.
//I'm 33.


Do you suck-start diesel engines for a living?
 
2013-05-08 09:48:04 AM  
Stock up now, kids.   http://www.liquidcaffeine.com/
 
2013-05-08 09:48:50 AM  

IlGreven: If mountain climbing caused people who weren't mountain climbing to break their legs, or if eating fried food caused others to have heart attacks, you might just have a point.


I'm pretty sure cancer-by-second-hand-smoke has also never been diagnosed.
 
2013-05-08 09:49:10 AM  

IlGreven: //I'm 33.


So is Jesus. oh wait. he's dead.
 
2013-05-08 09:49:27 AM  

Thraeryn: Stock up now, kids.   http://www.liquidcaffeine.com/


i.ebayimg.com
 
2013-05-08 09:50:21 AM  
I was drinking 2 glasses of caffeinated tea a day in the 4th grade.  In the 80s.  Whine a little more
 
2013-05-08 09:50:24 AM  

utah dude: IlGreven: //I'm 33.

So is Jesus. oh wait. he's undead.


ftfy

/braaaains
 
2013-05-08 09:51:19 AM  

tricycleracer: Thraeryn: Stock up now, kids.   http://www.liquidcaffeine.com/

[i.ebayimg.com image 300x225]


My god - I would bet that a teaspoon of that would kill you.
 
2013-05-08 09:51:31 AM  
http://psychcentral.com/lib/2010/caffeines-effect-on-adhd-symptoms/

Yeah, because it's way better to give a kid a handful of pills every morning, than just letting him have a diet coke a half hour before a test to help him focus.

//Yes, for some kids, the results with just a can of non-sugar soda works WONDERS on their ability to test well
 
2013-05-08 10:05:49 AM  

vwarb: If you want the freedom to climb mountains then you should accept the full health care costs of its effects when you break a leg.

If you want the freedom to eat fried food then you should accept the full health care costs of its effects when you have a heart attack.


If you want to run then you should accept the full health care costs of its effects when you tear a muscle, hurt your knee, get hit by a car, etc.

If you want to eat salad then you should accept the full health care costs of its effects when you get salmonella or w/e bacteria lettuce has a lot of.

If you want to sit all day then you should accept the full health care costs of its effects when you have a heart attack or blood clot.

I must be doing this right.
 
2013-05-08 10:18:58 AM  

Molavian: Good.  Then HFCS.


Except Caffeine has major health benefits.
 
2013-05-08 10:20:04 AM  

utah dude: fluffy2097: We could put them to work on farms or something.)

didn't we try that already, with cotton? why, i just purchased some Monsanto RoundUp Ready Drought Tolerant African Negros the other day.


This made me giggle uncontrollably.

Thank you.
 
2013-05-08 10:31:31 AM  

Mr Guy: http://psychcentral.com/lib/2010/caffeines-effect-on-adhd-symptoms/

Yeah, because it's way better to give a kid a handful of pills every morning, than just letting him have a diet coke a half hour before a test to help him focus.

//Yes, for some kids, the results with just a can of non-sugar soda works WONDERS on their ability to test well


According to Fark Physicatrists(tm), ADHD is a fake mental disorder invented by Novartis to sell drugs to children.

In all serious, though, I've experienced that personally.  I lost my health insurance coverage when I was 24 and couldn't afford to refill my Ritalin prescription, but then I discovered that a cup of tea had the same effect as a dose of Ritalin.  And if I stop consuming caffeine, once I get over the withdrawal symptoms I find that I have the same difficulty focusing that led me to use Ritalin in the first place.
 
2013-05-08 10:37:28 AM  

JohnAnnArbor: [dilbert.com image 640x200]



i376.photobucket.comCasually taken from Starbucks HQ's break room on my honeymoon.Anyone who's experienced a coffee drinker without an immediate morning fix will know that this is one segment of the population not to be trifled with.As far as the caffeine and ADHD/ADD thing, my son calms the fark down when given a cup of coffee or a Red Bull. It isn't a regular thing, but it's a good go-to when he's edgy. We tried prescription meds (Intuniv) for just a few days and it made him downright violent. It took two weeks for him to get back to normal, so we'll stick with the occasional caffeinated beverage.
 
2013-05-08 10:37:54 AM  

Epoch_Zero: mama4mooing: I'm not much for banning things, but really caffeine in oatmeal? Putting it foods that don't normally contain doesn't sound wise.


http://www.thinkgeek.com/product/f011/?pfm=Search&t=all-natural%20ca ff einated%20maple%20syrup


Wow
 
2013-05-08 10:39:57 AM  

Epoch_Zero: fluffy2097: thornhill: Cigarettes should be banned, or at least, smokers should be in their own insurance pool so I don't have to pay for their lung cancer surgeries. 90% of lung cancer is due to smoking. If you want the freedom to smoke then you should accept the full health care costs of its effects.

UNIVERSAL HEALTHCARE FOR EVERYONE

IF YOU HAVE A VICE, NO HEALTHCARE FOR YOU!

THE DEMOCRATIC PARTY. FREEDOM TO DO WHATEVER YOU WANT AS LONG AS IT'S WHATEVER THEY SAY.

You're getting straw just everywhere. Think of the janitors, man.


I lol'd.

/there's no caps lock fury like gun-nut caps lock fury
 
2013-05-08 10:40:07 AM  
I am really sorry about the scale of the photo and wall o' text underneath.  I usually Fark on mobile so my html skills suck now.
 
2013-05-08 10:47:51 AM  

thornhill: fluffy2097: Well, we're banning drinks over 16oz anyway, might as well take the caffeine out too.

Cigarettes should be banned, or at least, smokers should be in their own insurance pool so I don't have to pay for their lung cancer surgeries. 90% of lung cancer is due to smoking. If you want the freedom to smoke then you should accept the full health care costs of its effects.


Pregnant women too.  I don't want to pay for their damn babies.  And old people.  And obese people, they should accept full health care costs if they can't put the fork down.  And tan people, melanoma and other skin cancers are expensive!

/not a smoker, never have been, but this anti-smoking stuff is getting out of hand.
 
2013-05-08 10:48:06 AM  

ytterbium: JohnAnnArbor: [dilbert.com image 640x200]


[i376.photobucket.com image 850x637]Casually taken from Starbucks HQ's break room on my honeymoon.Anyone who's experienced a coffee drinker without an immediate morning fix will know that this is one segment of the population not to be trifled with.As far as the caffeine and ADHD/ADD thing, my son calms the fark down when given a cup of coffee or a Red Bull. It isn't a regular thing, but it's a good go-to when he's edgy. We tried prescription meds (Intuniv) for just a few days and it made him downright violent. It took two weeks for him to get back to normal, so we'll stick with the occasional caffeinated beverage.


You spent your honeymoon at the Starbucks HQ?
 
2013-05-08 10:56:56 AM  
Ban that shiat!

Too many assholes risking lives on our nation's highways, thinking that they are fine to drive, since they had coffee.

fark you druggies!


Remove it from Excedrin too!
 
2013-05-08 10:57:00 AM  
That article may well be the greatest Republican Party recruitment tool ever. Good job, Atlantic!
 
2013-05-08 10:57:26 AM  

God Is My Co-Pirate: ytterbium: JohnAnnArbor: [dilbert.com image 640x200]


[i376.photobucket.com image 850x637]Casually taken from Starbucks HQ's break room on my honeymoon.Anyone who's experienced a coffee drinker without an immediate morning fix will know that this is one segment of the population not to be trifled with.As far as the caffeine and ADHD/ADD thing, my son calms the fark down when given a cup of coffee or a Red Bull. It isn't a regular thing, but it's a good go-to when he's edgy. We tried prescription meds (Intuniv) for just a few days and it made him downright violent. It took two weeks for him to get back to normal, so we'll stick with the occasional caffeinated beverage.

You spent your honeymoon at the Starbucks HQ?


We were in Seattle, so I figured we'd check out Starbucks HQ. The elevators in the building were clearly marked, so I figured there'd be a reception area or wall of fame or something when the doors open.

Nope: directly into the office. No one was there, as it was a Sunday. I saw the coffee station with the mugs and figured they wouldn't miss the chipped one.

/srsly, beef up the security
 
2013-05-08 11:04:27 AM  
I normally like The Atlantic, but that entire article was 1000 words of fluff and opinion spun out of 50 words of the FDA's statement of, "We're not sure what to do about this, but we're thinking of doing something. Someday."
 
2013-05-08 11:12:18 AM  
No worries, most of the kids now all have Adderal prescriptions.

And it'll help the economy, because there's no way us middle aged geezers can compete any more if they take away our caffeine.
 
2013-05-08 11:21:48 AM  
Its gonna start with banning high capacity mugs.
I want mine whale sized damnit!
 
2013-05-08 12:00:27 PM  
Single shot only, coffee machines.

Actually, no one NEEDS a coffee machine. Manual coffee presses with one shot capacity.

Plus enhanced background checks, mandatory licensing, and you must present 3 valid forms of government ID in order to purchase a reasonable amount of the dangerous Colombian drug.
 
2013-05-08 12:10:17 PM  

graeth: Its gonna start with banning high capacity mugs.
I want mine whale sized damnit!


It's ok.  The politicians think that once you drink everything in a high capacity mug it cannot be refilled.
 
2013-05-08 12:47:28 PM  

anfrind: Mr Guy: http://psychcentral.com/lib/2010/caffeines-effect-on-adhd-symptoms/

Yeah, because it's way better to give a kid a handful of pills every morning, than just letting him have a diet coke a half hour before a test to help him focus.

//Yes, for some kids, the results with just a can of non-sugar soda works WONDERS on their ability to test well

According to Fark Physicatrists(tm), ADHD is a fake mental disorder invented by Novartis to sell drugs to children.

In all serious, though, I've experienced that personally.  I lost my health insurance coverage when I was 24 and couldn't afford to refill my Ritalin prescription, but then I discovered that a cup of tea had the same effect as a dose of Ritalin.  And if I stop consuming caffeine, once I get over the withdrawal symptoms I find that I have the same difficulty focusing that led me to use Ritalin in the first place.


This is so me (without the Ritalin - I seem to react very badly to meds).  I sip soda all day (takes me literally 8 hours to go through a 32-oz of diet soda).  With it, my coworkers think I'm smart, a little odd, and talk too fast.  Without it, OCD and ADHD kick into high and I become that brilliant asshole that everyone knows and hates; seriously, I get far more done but I lose all ability to interact with people as people instead of annoying badly-programmed machines.

If I can't sleep at night, a cup of Kona will put me right out (it's the only time I drink coffee).
 
2013-05-08 01:05:17 PM  
First they came for my soda, and I said nothing as I was not a soda drinker.
Then they came for my coffee, and I said I WILL FARKING CUT A BIATCH.
 
2013-05-08 01:09:26 PM  

tennessee.hillbilly: Molavian: Good.

Don't you blaspheme in here!  Don't you blaspheme in here!

/You better stop and think about the consequences of your actions!


Aw, shut up woman.
 
2013-05-08 01:30:49 PM  
"It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion. It is by the beans of Java that thoughts acquire speed, the hands acquire shaking, the shaking is a warning. It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion."
 
2013-05-08 01:35:00 PM  
Caffeine is awesome but I'm far from being addicted. I've found I can deal without my adderall all right if I get a goodly amount of the stuff before anything I need to focus on. Plus it's one of the few things that helps when I've got a migraine.
 
2013-05-08 02:12:33 PM  
Hmmmm, I wonder why.

thesocietypages.org
 
2013-05-08 02:39:06 PM  

fluffy2097: Well, we're banning drinks over 16oz anyway, might as well take the caffeine out too.

We should also ban alcohol. Lots of people die from that. We tried it before and it worked great. No more bars.

Diamonds are inhumane. Ban them.

Tobacco causes cancer. Ban it.

Guns kill, even though you are 46% less likely to be shot today then you were in 1993, with gun crimes making up a massive 1% of violent crime.
(Mostly committed by and against black males between the age of 18 to 40. Maybe we should regulate black youth? We could put them to work on farms or something.)

Banning stuff makes it go away forever and ever. Liberalism showed me this by banning all kinds of shiat they don't like, like privacy.


So are you retarded or just pretend to be while on the internet? Not once in the article does the word "ban" appear. The article does the usual media trope of putting a statement in the form of a question, but nowhere else in the article is the age of 21 mentioned. If any regulation is enacted, it will most likely restrict the amounts of caffeine that can be present in a drink, and perhaps guidelines on age restriction.
 
2013-05-08 03:57:59 PM  
I've heard that sex is to caffeine what methadone is to heroin.  Just putting that out there, ladies.
 
2013-05-08 05:21:17 PM  
does not matter if they try to regulate. Drop Coffee :) Bring water to boil let cool to about 170 (just before boiling) Pour grounds in and let them fall to bottom, scoop coffee from top and WALLA! high test coffee (mud, mountain Brew, Gypsy Java, et al). they will never shut down my caffeine intake Bwahahahahahahaaaaa. you can make it drop quicker and less mud like by pouring cold water lightly on top shocking the grounds down even but littile cream and sugar and mmmmmmmm
 
2013-05-08 11:20:54 PM  
Good. Fark caffeine. I wish everything was offered in a caffeine free version.
 
2013-05-08 11:43:49 PM  

TheHumanCannonball: So are you retarded or just pretend to be while on the internet?


If you can't figure it out what I'm doing, you're actually retarded, not just pretending to be on the internet.
 
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