If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Boston Herald)   Embalmer of Boston Marathon bombing suspect now wants White House help on what to do with the body, is worried about being stiffed with the stiff   (bostonherald.com) divider line 151
    More: Followup, White House, Boston, Tamerlan Tsarnaev, Ruslan Tsarni  
•       •       •

3266 clicks; posted to Main » on 08 May 2013 at 9:53 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



151 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | » | Last | Show all
 
2013-05-08 12:13:09 PM
Isn't there a law where if a body isn't claimed within a certain period of time, it's hauled off to the first med school that asks for it and then some frat boys get choppy-choppy with it?
 
2013-05-08 12:17:29 PM
UPS him to his folks, just don't send him C.O.D.
 
2013-05-08 12:26:15 PM

AeAe: raerae1980: I don't understand this.  Why was he not cremeted to begin with?  Did his family claim his body from the Coroner?  If so, then yes they have to make arrangements.  But if they never claimed the body, then the funeral director should have had him cremated.  Problem solved, give the ashes to the wife.

It's against Muslim tradition to cremate the body.


it's also against Muslim tradition to make pipe bombs, kill people and maim many others.  he lost his Islamic rights when he exploded the bombs.

/fark him
//burn him
 
2013-05-08 12:31:14 PM

monoski: Gov Patrick had the best response; this is not a govt issue it is a family issue, the family needs to make the arrangements.


Perhaps the first time I've actually agreed with the gov.
 
2013-05-08 12:32:31 PM
If they do bury him they better do it in an unmarked grave so there wont be a crowd there for morbid curiosity, desecration or reverance.
 
2013-05-08 12:37:24 PM
Can't they just cremate him and flush him down the toilet?
 
2013-05-08 12:39:37 PM

randomjsa: I'll say it again...

He's DEAD. You can't make him suffer anymore. You can't 'get him'. You can't do a damn thing to him now. So get over yourselves and put him in the god damn ground already.


I don't understand the sense of entitlement over which ground the guy is buried in. He can't hurt anyone else. Bury him, let his body return something of value to the earth and be done. Save your butthurt of "if only" and "he shouldn't be here". Death and burial aren't exclusive to citizenship. farking give me give me.
 
2013-05-08 12:45:17 PM
Why can't they just cremate the body and scatter the ashes?
 
2013-05-08 12:48:09 PM
Could they bronze him, give him an orange wig and set him up as a Ronald McDonald statue somewhere?

. . . well, it's an OPTION, jeez.
 
2013-05-08 12:49:41 PM

AeAe: coroner74: For the mortuary to have possession of the body from the Coroner's/ME's office I would think family has already signed for them to handle arrangements. He should put this matter on the family, not the government. I don't think he thought this thing through. I have no idea why this guy took the body, he should have known that he was going to have all sorts of trouble. Nobody in their right mind would have gotten themselves in this situation.

Are you a coroner?


I'd like to assign one.

/Obscure?
 
2013-05-08 01:01:56 PM

StrangeQ: Why can't they just cremate the body and scatter the ashes?


Or.. or.. just hear me out...

Chum the ocean for sharks, and throw him in ...  we all win!
 
2013-05-08 01:23:19 PM

randomjsa: I'll say it again...

He's DEAD. You can't make him suffer anymore. You can't 'get him'. You can't do a damn thing to him now. So get over yourselves and put him in the god damn ground already.


Now this is a surprising turn of events.
 
2013-05-08 01:33:52 PM
Bury him with Bin Laden... easy peasy...
 
2013-05-08 01:38:02 PM

monoski: Gov Patrick had the best response; this is not a govt issue it is a family issue, the family needs to make the arrangements.


It would appear that his widow does not want to be considered "family", and I can't blame her.
 
2013-05-08 01:44:14 PM
Mayor Menino says he won't allow him to be buried in Boston.

Okay, Mumbles, are you going to do the same when Whitey Bulger dies, too? Because he's responsible for far more murder and mayhem than the Chechen Speedbump.
 
2013-05-08 01:44:18 PM
i.qkme.me
 
2013-05-08 02:16:12 PM

Sybarite: Stefan said yesterday as protesters continued to picket the Graham Putnam & Mahoney Funeral Parlor in Worcester.

People sure seem to have an awful lot of time on their hands.


You've never been to Worcester, I take it? It's got a nice art museum, but that's about it.

/I feel sorry for the funeral home
//funeral home is known for dealing with those who couldn't afford a funeral/won't be buried by others
 
2013-05-08 02:35:24 PM
Solution:
Bury him on the Westboro Baptist Church property. Don't give them the option.
Problem solved.
 
2013-05-08 02:37:44 PM

UncleCal: Solution:
Bury him on the Westboro Baptist Church property. Don't give them the option.
Problem solved.


I have one better:  put the body *inside* the church, burn the whole thing down.
 
2013-05-08 02:43:42 PM
put him on a drag line behind a U2 and drop him over whateverastan.

/I'm sure he'll end up getting shipped back to Russia
//on our dime
 
2013-05-08 02:43:48 PM

randomjsa: I'll say it again...

He's DEAD. You can't make him suffer anymore. You can't 'get him'. You can't do a damn thing to him now. So get over yourselves and put him in the god damn ground already.


rjsa is the voice of reason?

25.media.tumblr.com

I guess they can ship him to Kansas.
 
2013-05-08 02:49:26 PM

LargeCanine: The parents have not claimed him? Wonderful people. Credit to the human race.


Not sure if sarcastic or serious...  Personally, family is family.  As others mentioned, he's dead.  Claim the body, bury it per religious requirements in a non-publicized plot in a remote cemetary, consider it done.  I'd leave off the headstone, without which you're unlikely to have any problems with vandalism.  People are mad, yes, but there's other things to concentrate on.
 
2013-05-08 03:19:30 PM
Who is the jackass who keeps submitting Herald links? That paper is the most irresponsible journalism this side of Fox News, and its vocabulary is dumbed down to fifth grade level so that transplanted rednecks have something to get all worked up over. The Herald's primary legit use is birdcage liner. If you eat any fish wrapped in the Herald, you get cancer.
 
2013-05-08 03:34:03 PM

randomjsa: I'll say it again...

He's DEAD. You can't make him suffer anymore. You can't 'get him'. You can't do a damn thing to him now. So get over yourselves and put him in the god damn ground already.


This.  The city of Cambridge needs to just STFU and bury him (or cremate him, I guess) in the same way they do all the other unclaimed bodies they get, pauper's grave or whatever it is.  He lived in Cambridge, he's unclaimed, that's it, end of story.  Handle it like all the rest of the homeless bodies, people who die in prison, etc.
 
2013-05-08 03:45:46 PM

LargeCanine: A burial plot would be problematical, not just because of people who would desecrate the grave, but also people who would venerate him.


The grave (with a full body or just ashes or whatever) doesn't need to be marked in any way.  It will have a number on it tied to some record somewhere but that's it, the public will never know which grave it is, and those places aren't trying to sell plots to anyone who is actually paying for their own burials anyway.  It's not a problem.
 
2013-05-08 04:37:22 PM
The Herald might be a tabloid paper, but at least they are not the Boston Globe who has been going out if business for years, but keeps getting "saved" by the politicians they are supposed to be reporting on. I wouldn't even use the Globe to line a bird cage, what a liberal rag with zero credibility.
 
2013-05-08 04:50:06 PM

Sybarite: Stefan said yesterday as protesters continued to picket the Graham Putnam & Mahoney Funeral Parlor in Worcester.

People sure seem to have an awful lot of time on their hands.


Yeah I love how people all talk about how evil the WBC is, then people turn around and do the exact same damn thing. News flash protesters: You wanna be better than the bomber?  Then stop being a horrible person.

/Get's my goat
//and I'm running out of goats
 
2013-05-08 04:50:51 PM
Cremation, give to parents. Maybe spit in the urn for good measure.
 
2013-05-08 04:58:42 PM

Reverend J: Sybarite: Stefan said yesterday as protesters continued to picket the Graham Putnam & Mahoney Funeral Parlor in Worcester.

People sure seem to have an awful lot of time on their hands.

Yeah I love how people all talk about how evil the WBC is, then people turn around and do the exact same damn thing. News flash protesters: You wanna be better than the bomber?  Then stop being a horrible person.

/Get's my goat
//and I'm running out of goats


Hmm.. let me understand what you're saying..

People angry at the Boston bomber after he killed 3 innocent people and injured hundreds ..  is the same as the WBC who picket soldiers' funerals killed in duty and say that gays should go to hell?  I can't place my finger quite on it, but these two things don't seem the same to me.  Hmmm...
 
2013-05-08 05:02:35 PM
The headline is misleading. Most funeral directors hold duel licenses as funeral director/embalmer. Muslims do not embalm or cremate. The burial ritual is very similar to the orthodox Jewish, (quite ironic, it is because they come from the desert. This means you get the body under ground as soon as you can.)

I offer this suggestion:
 The Body Farm in Tennessee.

Ultimately if the family can not fund a burial, the county or state will cover the cost (most states and counties cremate today.)

I also thought it was interesting that people protested the funeral home but did not protest the hospital that treated his brother.
 
2013-05-08 05:06:44 PM

AeAe: Reverend J: Sybarite: Stefan said yesterday as protesters continued to picket the Graham Putnam & Mahoney Funeral Parlor in Worcester.

People sure seem to have an awful lot of time on their hands.

Yeah I love how people all talk about how evil the WBC is, then people turn around and do the exact same damn thing. News flash protesters: You wanna be better than the bomber?  Then stop being a horrible person.

/Get's my goat
//and I'm running out of goats

Hmm.. let me understand what you're saying..

People angry at the Boston bomber after he killed 3 innocent people and injured hundreds ..  is the same as the WBC who picket soldiers' funerals killed in duty and say that gays should go to hell?  I can't place my finger quite on it, but these two things don't seem the same to me.  Hmmm...


I'm saying protesting funerals is morally reprehensible and should never be done. Not that difficult of notion to get your brain around.
 
2013-05-08 05:19:19 PM
I have a simple solution.
 
Give the surviving brother life in prison, and let the brothers share a cell.
 
50 years alone with his brothers rotting corpse.
 
2013-05-08 05:52:04 PM

Attention Whore of Babylon: No cemetery is going to take the body because they can't provide enough security.  You *know* what's going to happen to that grave.  And probably to nearby graves as well.

 
www.brutalashell.com
"But the most we can hope for is to get you buried in secrecy so your grave don't get violated!"
 
2013-05-08 06:30:32 PM
Maybe they should just toss it in the cell with the brother.  Let him deal with it.
 
2013-05-08 06:47:14 PM

Headso: ok, let me solve your problem right now. you cut up his body into 1000 small pieces and epoxy them like they do to those chinese convicts for that museum exhibit and then you sell each piece for 100 bucks. If you hate America you could put it on your altar and worship it and if you love America you could play t-ball  with it. Win/win for everyone.


i23.photobucket.com

Approves
 
2013-05-08 06:49:25 PM
Give it to a hog farm, let them feed the body to the hogs.

stir22: it's also against Muslim tradition to make pipe bombs, kill people and maim many others.


Obviously it isn't, since they do that every farking day.  You can't read a newspaper without reading articles about muslims doing that crap.  And they invariably scream about religion when they do it.
 
2013-05-08 07:08:27 PM
Mass. law requires every town to provide a suitable place for disposal of the dead.  Somebody needs to determine exactly where the guy died; that town has to take his corpse.
 
2013-05-08 07:13:44 PM

monoski: Gov Patrick had the best response; this is not a govt issue it is a family issue, the family needs to make the arrangements.


We're at the "or else what" stage now.
 
2013-05-08 07:15:28 PM

TV's Vinnie: Isn't there a law where if a body isn't claimed within a certain period of time, it's hauled off to the first med school that asks for it and then some frat boys get choppy-choppy with it?


No.  In most areas, county or municipal government must bury or cremate unclaimed bodies with a modicum of dignity.
 
2013-05-08 07:47:09 PM
He should loudly announce that he plans to bury it in a cemetery plot with a dead pig.  Muslims would freak, but then offer up a Muslim cemetery plot somewhere.
 
2013-05-08 07:57:35 PM

ginkor: He should loudly announce that he plans to bury it in a cemetery plot with a dead pig.  Muslims would freak, but then offer up a Muslim cemetery plot somewhere.


Yes, a funeral home should announce intention to desecrate a corpse. Brilliant business plan.
 
2013-05-08 08:02:23 PM
I know Muslims are not allowed to eat pork, but does it work the other way around?

media.tumblr.com
 
2013-05-08 08:14:01 PM

Arkanaut: What'll happen if somebody does bury him in Boston? Will they be sealed in a cave?

//obscure?


Actually, I would've thought someone might've suggested dragging him around the perimeter of Boston several times behind a chariot by now.

//yay classics!
 
2013-05-08 08:57:09 PM
Haoie:
Cremation, give to parents. Maybe spit defecate in the urn for good measure.

FTFY
 
2013-05-08 09:13:30 PM
I still say grind him up, feed him to a pig with its anus sewed-shut. Air drop the pig onto the family shack back in the old country. Make sure there's a camera crew ready to cover the bacon bomb landing...
 
2013-05-08 09:14:51 PM

Nina_Hartley's_Ass: ginkor: He should loudly announce that he plans to bury it in a cemetery plot with a dead pig.  Muslims would freak, but then offer up a Muslim cemetery plot somewhere.

Yes, a funeral home should announce intention to desecrate a corpse. Brilliant business plan.


That's not desecrating a corpse.  That is just giving him company in the afterlife, where he will get his 72 hagfishes.
 
2013-05-09 12:25:46 AM
Put the corpse on an aircraft carrier's catapult and charge money to be allowed to stand at the bow and shoot at the body as it whizzes off into the ocean.
 
2013-05-09 06:20:18 AM
Members of his family are denying he did anything, insisting that he was framed, so they're just as bad as he was.
 
2013-05-09 09:14:30 AM

The Stealth Hippopotamus: Mangoose: I hope enjoy being king of the crazies.

[img89.imageshack.us image 525x347]


Oddly enough that is what I imagine it would be like having sisters. Or a threesome. Or a threesome with my sisters.
 
2013-05-09 01:20:32 PM
Turn it into shoes.  Muslims love shoes.
 
Displayed 50 of 151 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report