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(Uproxx)   "There are too many suits of armor" -- Your sublimely sarcastic guide to bad reviews of Iron Man 3 (Warning: some spoilers if you haven't seen it yet)   (uproxx.com) divider line 224
    More: Cool, Iron Man, Shane Black  
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6527 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 06 May 2013 at 11:48 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-05-06 11:50:54 AM  
It wasn't great, but it was fun to watch.  A little over-the-top and things didn't make much sense, and very predictable, but it didn't feel like a waste of time.

That said, I could see how someone wouldn't like it.  On the other hand, Stark calling the kid a pussy was hilarious.
 
2013-05-06 11:54:40 AM  
I'm curious....was anybody expecting something other than a comic book movie?  I saw it, I laughed at some parts, I thought some parts were ridiculously over top, both in storytelling and technical aspects.  Won't pay to see it again, but should it happen to pop up on HBO one day while I'm surfing around, I'd watch it if I had nothing else to do.  Were people really expecting some great movie masterpiece?  It was solidly "ehh, good way to kill a Saturday afternoon"..and that's really all I was expecting
 
2013-05-06 11:54:58 AM  
Obviously some people just wanted a continuation of the first two movies.  This was put together by a different team, was a lot darker in tone and a lot more complicated than the first two.

But anyone who couldn't follow it should turn in their critic card.  This wasn't "Primer" for fark's sake.

I thought it was quite good.
 
2013-05-06 11:57:24 AM  
SPOILERS

Yeah, I was kind of meh about Iron Man 3, it was a weak final (I've heard RDJ is done with the series) chapter to a trilogy that started out well. Pepper/Gwyneth Paltrow becoming powerful?! I did like that he was an asshole to the kid, you hardly ever see someone talk shiat to a kid in a movie. When he told him to stop being a pussy because his dad left the audience gasped, Oh Snap! That was entertaining though it cements that RDJ's Tony Stark is a grown up man-boy. I liked it touched upon PTSD, but neatly resolved it.
 
2013-05-06 11:58:26 AM  
Just curious, how many people figured it all out when the plant exploded?  That was such a terrible giveaway, and imo, they could have left it out or left it until later.  I immediately figured out about Maya and Killion when he showed up uncrippled.
 
2013-05-06 11:59:30 AM  
I mean I didn't like how it neatly resolved the PTSD. Though it made me believe if there were real life superheroes, they'd be batshiat out of their mind will all sorts of physical and psychological trauma.
 
2013-05-06 11:59:39 AM  
Honestly? I loved the movie.

It was fun, it had action, I thought that what it did with the Mandarin was great and the stinger was awesome.

I loved the Dark Knight Trilogy (yes, even Rises) but not every superhero movie has to bee this deep meditation about morality, identity and such. Iron Man 3 had a nice balance between theme, fun and character.

Seen twice already, and I wouldn't mind seen a third...
 
2013-05-06 12:03:05 PM  
I liked how every time he turned around his nearly-indestructible suit got destroyed even by simply running into something.
 
2013-05-06 12:03:28 PM  
In related news, my buddy finished his ne "Patriot" suit just in time for opening weekend.

fbcdn-sphotos-b-a.akamaihd.net
 
2013-05-06 12:04:34 PM  
My favourite thing about Iron Man 3: a minor production assistant in the credits listed as "Thrain Shadbolt" which may be the coolest name I've ever seen, real or fictional.
 
2013-05-06 12:06:11 PM  

Mawson of the Antarctic: Though it made me believe if there were real life superheroes, they'd be batshiat out of their mind will all sorts of physical and psychological trauma.


I think that wouldn't be half of it. Either they would be broken husks or they would have god complex to end all god complexes.

They know they can save some of the people but they can't save everyone, but people will blame you if you dont. I'd think that would give you a twitch.
 
2013-05-06 12:06:29 PM  
Loved it.  Lot's of time spent on character development, great casting choices, was kept entertained the entire time.  Thought it outshone 1 and 2.  Great jerb.
 
2013-05-06 12:07:49 PM  

Beerguy: In related news, my buddy finished his ne "Patriot" suit just in time for opening weekend.

[fbcdn-sphotos-b-a.akamaihd.net image 690x920]


Probably not before the snark brigade arrives... but that's awesome.
 
2013-05-06 12:08:44 PM  

God Is My Co-Pirate: My favourite thing about Iron Man 3: a minor production assistant in the credits listed as "Thrain Shadbolt" which may be the coolest name I've ever seen, real or fictional.


You seem to have forgotten The Amazing RANDO!
 
2013-05-06 12:08:56 PM  
My skydiving coach is one of the stuntmen in Iron Man 3.  He's the black colonel in the scene where they get blown out of the plane.  He said that stunt took 500 jumps -- 50 each for ten stunt actors, using hidden rigs.

My brush with fame.
 
2013-05-06 12:09:52 PM  

JohnBigBootay: Beerguy: In related news, my buddy finished his ne "Patriot" suit just in time for opening weekend.

[fbcdn-sphotos-b-a.akamaihd.net image 690x920]

Probably not before the snark brigade arrives... but that's awesome.


Here is a better pic. He made both of these suits.
fbcdn-sphotos-h-a.akamaihd.net
 
2013-05-06 12:10:24 PM  

cabbyman: I liked how every time he turned around his nearly-indestructible suit got destroyed even by simply running into something.


That.  Plus that 10 year old kid just snaps off one of the fingers.  Really?  It can handle a hit from the Thunder God but a little kid can snap off a finger.
 
2013-05-06 12:11:42 PM  
I enjoyed it significantly more than Spider-Man 3, X-Men: The Last Stand and TMNT III.

I enjoyed it about as much as Transformers: Dark of the Moon (but I'm a fan of the series, despite its stupidity and knowledge that it could have been so much better).

I did not enjoy it as much as TDKR.

Superman III is outdated and you can't really compare them.

Name another third installment of a live-action comic book movie?
 
2013-05-06 12:12:13 PM  

Mawson of the Antarctic: I mean I didn't like how it neatly resolved the PTSD. Though it made me believe if there were real life superheroes, they'd be batshiat out of their mind will all sorts of physical and psychological trauma.


I don't think his anxiety was PTSD so much as a crippling fear of powerlessness that was leading to panic attacks and nightmares. He was thinking of Iron Man as the suit and the suit was out matched. When the kid told him to "build something" he realized that he personally was Iron Man and the suits were just a weapon.

He went from thinking the suit was his superpower to realizing that he was a superhero and the suit was a tool.
 
2013-05-06 12:12:47 PM  

God Is My Co-Pirate: My favourite thing about Iron Man 3: a minor production assistant in the credits listed as "Thrain Shadbolt" which may be the coolest name I've ever seen, real or fictional.


It's a pseudonym for Bob Johnson.
 
2013-05-06 12:13:09 PM  

Mawson of the Antarctic: (I've heard RDJ is done with the series)


I read the opposite.  that he's open to a couple more movies.
 
2013-05-06 12:13:40 PM  

Son of Thunder: God Is My Co-Pirate: My favourite thing about Iron Man 3: a minor production assistant in the credits listed as "Thrain Shadbolt" which may be the coolest name I've ever seen, real or fictional.

You seem to have forgotten The Amazing RANDO!


He's too busy doing battle with Eastman.
 
2013-05-06 12:13:54 PM  
The "too many villains" criticism is just stupid. Unless you're a reader of the comic books, the Extremis-powered goons are just that: senior goons. They're not villains with their own motivation, backstory, and goals that complicate the story. They're just people carrying out Killian's orders.

So apparently they repurposed the names/identities of other villains from the comic books -- I wouldn't know, I haven't read IM in years. Was the name "coldblood" even mentioned? I guess that makes it a bit more fun for those in the know, but doesn't affect the rest of us.
 
2013-05-06 12:17:26 PM  
Saw this last night, and had a great time.  That said, it's one of those movies I have to stop thinking about right after leaving the theater- otherwise, the plot holes just seem to jump out and ruin it for me.  I am perfectly willing to admit I may have missed something but I have to ask

***SPOILERS*****
What was Killian's motivation?  What exactly was he trying to accomplish?  Did he just want to have a political puppet in power?  Was he just trying to cover up the cause of the explosions?
 
2013-05-06 12:22:28 PM  

JinxofSpades: Saw this last night, and had a great time.  That said, it's one of those movies I have to stop thinking about right after leaving the theater- otherwise, the plot holes just seem to jump out and ruin it for me.  I am perfectly willing to admit I may have missed something but I have to ask

***SPOILERS*****
What was Killian's motivation?  What exactly was he trying to accomplish?  Did he just want to have a political puppet in power?  Was he just trying to cover up the cause of the explosions?


He wanted to run the world from behind the scenes. He actually told us that.
 
2013-05-06 12:22:37 PM  

JinxofSpades: Saw this last night, and had a great time.  That said, it's one of those movies I have to stop thinking about right after leaving the theater- otherwise, the plot holes just seem to jump out and ruin it for me.  I am perfectly willing to admit I may have missed something but I have to ask

***SPOILERS*****
What was Killian's motivation?  What exactly was he trying to accomplish?  Did he just want to have a political puppet in power?  Was he just trying to cover up the cause of the explosions?


He wanted a puppet in power to fund his research/make him rich and powerful.
 
2013-05-06 12:25:07 PM  

The Stealth Hippopotamus: They know they can save some of the people but they can't save everyone, but people will blame you if you dont. I'd think that would give you a twitch.


There's a comic that deals with this, called Incorruptible. I believe it's basically "What happens when a superman like character snaps."

/The answer is VERY BAD THINGS.
 
2013-05-06 12:26:40 PM  

PsyLord: cabbyman: I liked how every time he turned around his nearly-indestructible suit got destroyed even by simply running into something.

That.  Plus that 10 year old kid just snaps off one of the fingers.  Really?  It can handle a hit from the Thunder God but a little kid can snap off a finger.


You guys might've missed this several times in the movie but he clearly states its a prototype suit.  And after watching the movie you realize its not built like any of the other suits. So, you know, that was explained.
 
2013-05-06 12:27:26 PM  

JinxofSpades: What was Killian's motivation? What exactly was he trying to accomplish? Did he just want to have a political puppet in power? Was he just trying to cover up the cause of the explosions?


Strictly my interpretation: based on a comment Killian makes, I think the goal was to make money selling the Extremis tech to governments for supersoldiers, especially (perhaps exclusively?) the US government, once he has figured out how to stabilize it. He uses the Mandarin to generate fear, which will create (or justify) the demand, and then fulfills the demand either by hiring out his goons or selling the tech directly, and is able to keep the con going because he has a hold on the VP (at least until the next election).

And no, it doesn't seem like a very good plan to me either.
 
2013-05-06 12:28:50 PM  
To The Escape Zeppelin!:

He wanted to run the world from behind the scenes. He actually told us that.

You're the jerk... jerk:

He wanted a puppet in power to fund his research/make him rich and powerful.

Ok, that was more or less what I got from it.  It just seemed like...a long way to go, I guess.  Thanks!
 
2013-05-06 12:28:53 PM  

God Is My Co-Pirate: My favourite thing about Iron Man 3: a minor production assistant in the credits listed as "Thrain Shadbolt" which may be the coolest name I've ever seen, real or fictional.


Roll Fizzlebeef
Buff Slabchunk
Big McLargeHuge
Fridge Largemeat

/Bob Johnson...no wait
 
2013-05-06 12:30:38 PM  

nitefallz: PsyLord: cabbyman: I liked how every time he turned around his nearly-indestructible suit got destroyed even by simply running into something.

That.  Plus that 10 year old kid just snaps off one of the fingers.  Really?  It can handle a hit from the Thunder God but a little kid can snap off a finger.

You guys might've missed this several times in the movie but he clearly states its a prototype suit.  And after watching the movie you realize its not built like any of the other suits. So, you know, that was explained.


A prototype suit that can withstand getting shot at with a machine gun, pummeled about when his mansion is collapsing on him, protect him enough when he crash lands in Tenn. but not when a little kid pulls on its finger.  Gotcha.
 
2013-05-06 12:32:05 PM  

ManateeGag: Mawson of the Antarctic: (I've heard RDJ is done with the series)

I read the opposite.  that he's open to a couple more movies.


He should just walk away, now. RDJ's a great actor who doesn't need to keep making these lowbrow popcorn flicks for the cheeto-stained masses. He needs to start looking for more substantial, dramatic roles and leave the corny superhero stuff to the Bradley Coopers and Ryan Reynoldses of the acting world.
 
2013-05-06 12:32:07 PM  

JinxofSpades: Saw this last night, and had a great time.  That said, it's one of those movies I have to stop thinking about right after leaving the theater- otherwise, the plot holes just seem to jump out and ruin it for me.  I am perfectly willing to admit I may have missed something but I have to ask

***SPOILERS*****
What was Killian's motivation?  What exactly was he trying to accomplish?  Did he just want to have a political puppet in power?  Was he just trying to cover up the cause of the explosions?


I think he was trying to get a massive military contract/grant to perfect their "regrowth" serum and then sell it as a military weapon. Plus he wanted to force Stark to work on it, or at least fark him over for leaving him on that rooftop and then refusing to be involved with developing it in any way. With the VP in charge and the public afraid of the Mandarin, who was more powerful than any Iron Man suit, the contract would be guaranteed.

I'm still stuck on how the helicopters that destroyed Stark's home would get away without drawing the attention of the military. Even a "stand down" order from the VP would raise a shiatload of eyebrows.
 
2013-05-06 12:34:09 PM  
Whoops I'm sorry, apparently the comic book I'm referring too is Irredeemable, not Incorruptible.
 
2013-05-06 12:34:25 PM  
I think the too many villains argument has some validity to it when you consider that the movie only gives about 5 minutes to introduce the character and explain the motivation for his actions. Tony Stark has 2 1/2 movies to portray ironman to the audience so we we can understand his character. Its hard to introduce one, two or even three new villains to an audience in the few minutes of screen time they get while doing any real job and rounding them out. They are flat one dimensional cardboard illusions of something we just cannot comprehend fully while trying to understand the plot. Think of how bad the third spiderman movie was with three villains and one of those had 3 movies to warm up to you.

The argument about the Avengers seems to point at the concern as to why Ironman has to go it alone. Why not pick up the phone and call shield? Why not pick up the phone and call the Hulk? Having RDJ do everything along to portray the struggling hero before the conflict is resolved just felt eh to me. If you are going to constantly make reference to the events in NYC that took place in the avengers why not use it?

Oh and the whole thing with the kid as filler was not needed. More Blackwidow in leather pants time could have been placed there.
 
2013-05-06 12:35:30 PM  
I'll wait to find out what the guys at Filmspotting think about it
 
2013-05-06 12:35:32 PM  

Fireproof: JinxofSpades: Saw this last night, and had a great time.  That said, it's one of those movies I have to stop thinking about right after leaving the theater- otherwise, the plot holes just seem to jump out and ruin it for me.  I am perfectly willing to admit I may have missed something but I have to ask

***SPOILERS*****
What was Killian's motivation?  What exactly was he trying to accomplish?  Did he just want to have a political puppet in power?  Was he just trying to cover up the cause of the explosions?

I think he was trying to get a massive military contract/grant to perfect their "regrowth" serum and then sell it as a military weapon. Plus he wanted to force Stark to work on it, or at least fark him over for leaving him on that rooftop and then refusing to be involved with developing it in any way. With the VP in charge and the public afraid of the Mandarin, who was more powerful than any Iron Man suit, the contract would be guaranteed.

I'm still stuck on how the helicopters that destroyed Stark's home would get away without drawing the attention of the military. Even a "stand down" order from the VP would raise a shiatload of eyebrows.


Only 1 helicopter got away.  The rest were destroyed by IM.  Plus it looked like it had disguised itself as a tv news copter so perhaps it blended with the rest of those choppers?  That was kinda odd that Tony didn't have banks of repulsor cannons that could take out those rockets as a means of defense against rocket attack.

/shrug
 
2013-05-06 12:36:20 PM  

ManateeGag: Mawson of the Antarctic: (I've heard RDJ is done with the series)

I read the opposite.  that he's open to a couple more movies.


I keep getting conflicting vibes from him. It seems like he enjoys the character of Tony Stark but the armor- even though it has been improved upon since the first movie- is still a real hassle for him to wear for long (and didn't he get hurt filming this last movie?). Personally I think if they had to CG his head onto a stunt doubles body etc. just to keep him coming back I could deal with that.
 
2013-05-06 12:36:47 PM  

PsyLord: cabbyman: I liked how every time he turned around his nearly-indestructible suit got destroyed even by simply running into something.

That.  Plus that 10 year old kid just snaps off one of the fingers.  Really?  It can handle a hit from the Thunder God but a little kid can snap off a finger.


I don't think it was broken as much as removed. Without energy, the armor is barely holding together so it could be easy to just remove pieces.
 
2013-05-06 12:36:50 PM  

PsyLord: nitefallz: PsyLord: cabbyman: I liked how every time he turned around his nearly-indestructible suit got destroyed even by simply running into something.

That.  Plus that 10 year old kid just snaps off one of the fingers.  Really?  It can handle a hit from the Thunder God but a little kid can snap off a finger.

You guys might've missed this several times in the movie but he clearly states its a prototype suit.  And after watching the movie you realize its not built like any of the other suits. So, you know, that was explained.

A prototype suit that can withstand getting shot at with a machine gun, pummeled about when his mansion is collapsing on him, protect him enough when he crash lands in Tenn. but not when a little kid pulls on its finger.  Gotcha.


That would be the state it was in after going through all those things, then flying across the country, crash landing on a paved road, and then being dragged for miles in the snow.

Plus, that one finger could have just been faulty/damaged.
 
2013-05-06 12:39:51 PM  

PsyLord: nitefallz: PsyLord: cabbyman: I liked how every time he turned around his nearly-indestructible suit got destroyed even by simply running into something.

That.  Plus that 10 year old kid just snaps off one of the fingers.  Really?  It can handle a hit from the Thunder God but a little kid can snap off a finger.

You guys might've missed this several times in the movie but he clearly states its a prototype suit.  And after watching the movie you realize its not built like any of the other suits. So, you know, that was explained.

A prototype suit that can withstand getting shot at with a machine gun, pummeled about when his mansion is collapsing on him, protect him enough when he crash lands in Tenn. but not when a little kid pulls on its finger.  Gotcha.


Well...  The suit WAS made to come apart into little pieces so Stark could summon them to him because he really, REALLY envies Thor and his hammer.

I didn't really let those little things bug me much while I was watching.  I thought it was pretty slick little movie, and I really hope it isn't the end for the RDJ era.  His back and forth with that kid, for instance, were some of the funniest things I've ever seen in a superhero movie.  It's almost worth watching the movie just for that alone.
 
2013-05-06 12:41:11 PM  

Crotchrocket Slim: ManateeGag: Mawson of the Antarctic: (I've heard RDJ is done with the series)

I read the opposite.  that he's open to a couple more movies.

I keep getting conflicting vibes from him. It seems like he enjoys the character of Tony Stark but the armor- even though it has been improved upon since the first movie- is still a real hassle for him to wear for long (and didn't he get hurt filming this last movie?). Personally I think if they had to CG his head onto a stunt doubles body etc. just to keep him coming back I could deal with that.


Iron Man made the second half of his life.  He's very grateful for that and has said so.  He'll be back.  This sin't just a cash game for him.  He honestly is appreciative of how the IM films rebooted his career to the A-list.
 
2013-05-06 12:42:15 PM  

Son of Thunder: God Is My Co-Pirate: My favourite thing about Iron Man 3: a minor production assistant in the credits listed as "Thrain Shadbolt" which may be the coolest name I've ever seen, real or fictional.

You seem to have forgotten The Amazing RANDO!


Don't forget his nemesis East-MAN!
 
2013-05-06 12:43:42 PM  

The Stealth Hippopotamus: Mawson of the Antarctic: Though it made me believe if there were real life superheroes, they'd be batshiat out of their mind will all sorts of physical and psychological trauma.

I think that wouldn't be half of it. Either they would be broken husks or they would have god complex to end all god complexes.

They know they can save some of the people but they can't save everyone, but people will blame you if you dont. I'd think that would give you a twitch.


Just another in the list of reasons why Superman is completely bat-shiat insane.
 
2013-05-06 12:44:20 PM  

smerfnablin: The argument about the Avengers seems to point at the concern as to why Ironman has to go it alone. Why not pick up the phone and call shield? Why not pick up the phone and call the Hulk? Having RDJ do everything along to portray the struggling hero before the conflict is resolved just felt eh to me. If you are going to constantly make reference to the events in NYC that took place in the avengers why not use it?


***MORE SPOILERS***

That. Also, I feel like there were plenty of times he could have used one of the 20 suits in that secret basement of his. Though you could make the argument that he needed the Mandarin to believe he was dead in order to give him time to regroup.
 
2013-05-06 12:44:47 PM  

ManateeGag: Mawson of the Antarctic: (I've heard RDJ is done with the series)

I read the opposite.  that he's open to a couple more movies.


Why not? He has points. He got like $50m for The Avengers once tickets were counted.
 
2013-05-06 12:45:44 PM  

PsyLord: nitefallz: PsyLord: cabbyman: I liked how every time he turned around his nearly-indestructible suit got destroyed even by simply running into something.

That.  Plus that 10 year old kid just snaps off one of the fingers.  Really?  It can handle a hit from the Thunder God but a little kid can snap off a finger.

You guys might've missed this several times in the movie but he clearly states its a prototype suit.  And after watching the movie you realize its not built like any of the other suits. So, you know, that was explained.

A prototype suit that can withstand getting shot at with a machine gun, pummeled about when his mansion is collapsing on him, protect him enough when he crash lands in Tenn. but not when a little kid pulls on its finger.  Gotcha.


You underestimate children's ability to destroy expensive things.
 
2013-05-06 12:46:42 PM  

PsyLord: nitefallz: PsyLord: cabbyman: I liked how every time he turned around his nearly-indestructible suit got destroyed even by simply running into something.

That.  Plus that 10 year old kid just snaps off one of the fingers.  Really?  It can handle a hit from the Thunder God but a little kid can snap off a finger.

You guys might've missed this several times in the movie but he clearly states its a prototype suit.  And after watching the movie you realize its not built like any of the other suits. So, you know, that was explained.

A prototype suit that can withstand getting shot at with a machine gun, pummeled about when his mansion is collapsing on him, protect him enough when he crash lands in Tenn. but not when a little kid pulls on its finger.  Gotcha.


The problem I see with the prototype argument was that in the final battle SPOILERS!!!!!

All of the suits seemed like they were getting destroyed in the background. They won the battle due to numbers, but one on one the Extremis guys were destroying the suits. Stark personally went through at least 3 suits to defeat Killian.
 
2013-05-06 12:46:44 PM  
My favorite Filmy thing:

Went back to watch Lethal Weapon after IM3 (Shane Black, etc.., etc...) , apparently Tony's Food Service has been a catering favorite for twenty five years.  heh.
 
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