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(Debka Files)   Russian and Iranian media predicting full-scale Middle East war involving Israel erupting in hours. CNN reports already sixty-five millionty-billion dead in Iceland, a giant octopus attacking Rome, and Ted Turner has grown five extra penises   (debka.com) divider line 344
    More: Followup, Iranians, Middle East, Russians, CNN, Israelis, Iceland, Syrian Army, Israel Air Force  
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14355 clicks; posted to Main » on 05 May 2013 at 11:53 AM (50 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-05-05 12:35:48 PM

Hobo Jr.: So am I like just totally a bad person in hoping that there is a huge bloody war?


Yes, basically.
 
2013-05-05 12:36:52 PM

PC LOAD LETTER: Because he's not a Christian?


So he's yapping on about this idiocy in two threads?
 
2013-05-05 12:38:22 PM

doyner: Tatsuma: That's what happens when you treat politics with football. Your team or nothing!

Oh, the irony.


I wouldn't call it "irony" so much as "projection."
 
2013-05-05 12:38:27 PM

Tatsuma: Iran using Syria and Hizbullah as proxies has been going on for nearly 35-40 years, so not a surprise.


True, just seems that they might be taking advantage of the unrest in the area to try and sneak more weapons through.
 
2013-05-05 12:40:37 PM
sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net
 
2013-05-05 12:40:54 PM

Popcorn Johnny: Tatsuma: Iran using Syria and Hizbullah as proxies has been going on for nearly 35-40 years, so not a surprise.

True, just seems that they might be taking advantage of the unrest in the area to try and sneak more weapons through.


They are only doing that to insure their proxies survive the uprising though
 
2013-05-05 12:43:06 PM
This will end pretty much the same way the North Korean "OMG, we're all going to die!" issue died.  Syria and Iran will talk trash until they've backed themselves into a political corner with their own people.  They won't want to back down for fear of losing face.  Then, when the western media have sufficiently worked everyone into a slobbering frenzy, a dog will fall down a well, a celebrity will get busted for drunk driving, etc..., and our ADHD riddled culture will forget that it even happened within 48 hours.
 
2013-05-05 12:44:12 PM

Satanic_Hamster: Why is Tatsuma trolling on the Sabbath?


media1.break.com
it's pronounced: Shabbos.
 
2013-05-05 12:46:07 PM
Sweet, another thread to figure out who the neo-nazis of fark are!

/hint, its the same people in every thread about anything even remotely related to israel
 
2013-05-05 12:46:22 PM

DAR: PainInTheASP: I hear that Des Moines has declared martial law and is standing by to be overrun.

possible, it's still raining here in Des Moines and the farmers are pissed about it......but other wise its quiet outside this am........k/dar


well, after what the large underground homosexual population did to the soil, stuart.
 
2013-05-05 12:47:19 PM

Epiphany: Sweet, another thread to figure out who the neo-nazis of fark are!

/hint, its the same people in every thread about anything even remotely related to israel


do you attend the meetings?
 
2013-05-05 12:50:50 PM
Sixty five millionty billion dead in Iceland?

Xenu been up to his old tricks again?
 
2013-05-05 12:53:22 PM

SithLord: Satanic_Hamster: Why is Tatsuma trolling on the Sabbath?

Because the Sabbath was yesterday.


He was active all day yesterday in Israel threads too.
 
2013-05-05 12:54:11 PM

dr_blasto: Surprised Israel has taken this long to do anything. With the crazy civil war next store, reports of Assad having chemical weapons (before the reports of using them), I figured they'd strike depots early to avoid those weapons getting distributed to the crazies. Also surprised Turkey hasn't done anything either.

If/when Assad falls, there's a strong likelihood that the storage facilities get raided by rebels. If that crap falls into the wrong hands, like the crazy fundies instead of the FSA, every border country is at risk.


I'd imagine a lot states are not really that upset about the strikes.  They're ringing their hands and going "Bad Zionists" for public consumption even as their aide is in the other room faxing maps and intel reports to Mossad.  Iran of course will run its mouth, but odds are a lot of this stuff was agreed upon in back rooms prior to the strikes.
 
2013-05-05 12:54:24 PM

Weaver95: Tatsuma: Weaver95: if that's what gets you through the day, sure.

How does it feel to know that I have much more mainstream opinions than you about pretty much everything? That's how far you've gone, weav. We're waiting for you back in the center at some point!

/Still love you
//Hope your father is doing well too

again, if that's what gets you thru the day, sure.  Dad passed away 4 years ago btw.  thanks for noticing.


Time flies when you're having Fark.
 
2013-05-05 12:56:24 PM
Well, as has already been pointed out, Assad can't sit by and do nothing as that would make him appear weak.  He already has all he can handle with the rebels in his own country and starting a new war on a second front with Israel would ensure his downfall.  He took the only option available to him at this time - talk a big talk, but nothing more.

I am not so sure that Iran won't venture into the fray.  They surmise, and probably correctly, that the U.S. won't get directly involved, and may declare war on Israel if Syria does more than just bluster and engages Israel on the battlefield. If that happens, and Obama does not provide enough support to ensure the survival of Israel, he and the rest of the Democrats risk losing the support of the Jewish-American community which, while being a small percentage of the population, wield a substantial amount of political and financial power in the U.S..
 
2013-05-05 12:57:07 PM

Tatsuma: elvisaintdead: Easy, there. Some things we simply don't consider.

Thus, the raging.

doglover: By attacking ammo depots belonging to people currently accused of unleashing chemical weapons?

"Israel does something = Israel" being a prick to many people. "Israel not doing something = also Israel being a prick" to these people. Pretty much "Israel = Prick" is a constant value.


I prefer:

if (Israel doing something)
    Israel is being a prick;
else
    Israel is being a prick;
 
2013-05-05 12:57:31 PM

Satanic_Hamster: SithLord: Satanic_Hamster: Why is Tatsuma trolling on the Sabbath?

Because the Sabbath was yesterday.

He was active all day yesterday in Israel threads too.


Time stamps.  It was likely after sundown there.  Besides, I wasn't on here yesterday much.
 
2013-05-05 12:59:27 PM

doglover: 21-7-b: Anyone any views on how to solve syria?

Captain Trips.


How about something that leaves rather more people alive?
 
2013-05-05 12:59:37 PM
Giant octopus attacking Rome? I hope she was built by Ray Harryhausen, God love 'im.

(In other news, Ray Harryhausen is still alive at 93. Knock on wood.)

And for those who were home-schooled, here is a list (with clips) of his critters, including the giant octopus, It!, from It Came from the Sea.

Re-release the Kraken!
 
2013-05-05 01:00:06 PM
 I don't blame Israel for doing what they need to do. In their own way, they are helping to overthrow
Assad. He's been a pain in the butt for the entire region for decades. Let that area sort their crap out.
This keeps the U.S. from having to mess with it shows the world that you guys need to
handle your own crap in your region and not come crying to the U.S. for everything, making
us the "bad guy" for picking a side in a fight we didn't need to be in to begin with.

 The U.S. can deal with the more dangerous fish, like Best Korea and Iran, but it's time for everyone else to
deal with their civil wars,regional religious nuts and dictators.
 
2013-05-05 01:00:16 PM
LOL. Who still reads Debka? It's like getting your news from this:

imageshack.us

Or like using rightwing media in the US for election predictions:

imageshack.us
 
2013-05-05 01:01:34 PM

Tatsuma: When has Israel ever gone into a conflict and needed US help to finish?


October 1973. See Operation Nickel Grass.
 
2013-05-05 01:02:30 PM
Don't forget kids, tomorrow is Martyrs Day. I wish I were kidding. :( It must suck being on the ground there.
 
2013-05-05 01:02:53 PM
What I don't get is, we know he has chemical weapons. We know where they are. We haven't had any qualms about folks sending in strike teams to destroy Syrian WMDs before. Why not destroy the production plants and storage bunkers? It would eliminate any chance of the West's red line from being crossed, and allow them to stew in peace*. Russia would breathe a sigh of relief, and Obama can stay out of the Middle East and not look like a hypocrite.


*[inigomontoya.jpg]
 
2013-05-05 01:03:04 PM
OMG!!!

images.wikia.com
 
2013-05-05 01:04:59 PM

Hobo Jr.: So am I like just totally a bad person in hoping that there is a huge bloody war?

I am pretty liberal but seriously can't these two groups just destroy each other and be done with it.  It could be the first and last great act of humanity they ever do.


Not at all.  The simple fact of the matter is that every person alive can plainly see what is on the horizon, this ominous cloud of death and destruction that looms above every nation, ready to descend and consume us all.  We all see it, but the thought of it is so terrifying that most people either refuse to acknowledge it, assume that it will only affect the "other guy," or actively run from it/try to impede its progress.

All any of those things do is make the situation worse by delaying the inevitable.  Putting off the storm just makes the cloud larger, and the coming storm all the more intense.

What you're saying is that you're ready for the storm.  And I'm with you.  The sooner we get this done, the less severe it will be.  Just like ripping off a band-aid.  Bring it on.  We're big kids.  We can take it.

Where you are wrong, however, is in thinking that (a) this conflict will be limited to these two parties and (b) that neither of these parties have contributed anything to humanity.  Not only have they given the world a tremendous bounty of knowledge already, they're not done yet, and if either society were wiped out human civilization would be tragically denied the benefits of their strength, wisdom, and experience.
 
2013-05-05 01:05:21 PM

Pumpernickel bread: I am not so sure that Iran won't venture into the fray.


It all depends on what was agreed upon prior to the strike.  If Turkey, Jordan, Saudi Arabia, Israel, and America (plus perhaps Iraq) all had concerns over the weapons stockpiles end up in the hands of fundies, I think it is likely that everyone agreed Israeli should perform the strikes.  Only America, Israel, and Turkey really have the military capabilities to perform those kind of strikes.  If America does it, then odds are it becomes some big NATO intervention and gets too damn big.  Turkey doing it is a problem in that they lose their ability to operate in the midground and act as a bridge between the West and the Middle East.

In that case, I assume Israel was given guarantees by the other parties and Iran will be told to shut the fark up and go sit down.  After all it isn't like the Arabs and Turks get along that well with the Persians.
 
2013-05-05 01:07:06 PM

ha-ha-guy: dr_blasto: Surprised Israel has taken this long to do anything. With the crazy civil war next store, reports of Assad having chemical weapons (before the reports of using them), I figured they'd strike depots early to avoid those weapons getting distributed to the crazies. Also surprised Turkey hasn't done anything either.

If/when Assad falls, there's a strong likelihood that the storage facilities get raided by rebels. If that crap falls into the wrong hands, like the crazy fundies instead of the FSA, every border country is at risk.

I'd imagine a lot states are not really that upset about the strikes.  They're ringing their hands and going "Bad Zionists" for public consumption even as their aide is in the other room faxing maps and intel reports to Mossad.  Iran of course will run its mouth, but odds are a lot of this stuff was agreed upon in back rooms prior to the strikes.


Nobody should be upset. Really, Syria is a mess and any action to keep the worst of it from spreading like a violent cancer to its neighbors would likely be seen as a positive. The uprising has created a humanitarian crisis along all of Syria's borders, Turkey can't deal with more refugees, Jordan is beginning to feel the pain and Israel is probably sweating the load of what would happen if shiat pours over their borders just like anyone else.
 
2013-05-05 01:08:08 PM

SithLord: Time stamps. It was likely after sundown there. Besides, I wasn't on here yesterday much.


He's right, I posted all day on Friday before sunset and Saturday after sunset

I've been caught by the great internet sleuth! I would have gotten away with it if it wasn't for you meddling kids!

Stone Meadow: October 1973. See Operation Nickel Grass.


By the time the first weapons arrived in Israel, the IDF was deep inside Syrian and Egyptian territory, rolling toward Damascus and Cairo and the war had already been won. Not saying it didn't help, but certainly wasn't a factor in Israel's victory, as we'd already won.
 
2013-05-05 01:11:52 PM

21-7-b: doglover: 21-7-b: Anyone any views on how to solve syria?

Captain Trips.

How about something that leaves rather more people alive?


The important ones will make it.
 
2013-05-05 01:12:08 PM
I find the idea of Syria fighting Israel to be... well... humorous.  Maybe if a lot of other countries got involved, but Syria versus Israel would last about as long as me versus, say, Mayweather.
 
2013-05-05 01:12:13 PM

readbot42: Don't forget kids, tomorrow is Martyrs Day.



F**k, is that TOMORROW? I always wait until the last minute to get my mom a Martyrs Day card and flowers.
 
2013-05-05 01:12:28 PM
images.gasbuddy.com

Otherwise I don't care.
 
2013-05-05 01:13:42 PM
Nobody in the Middle East is going to war with Israel again unless it's with nuclear weapons. An all-out conventional war with Israel will never happen.
 
2013-05-05 01:14:57 PM

omnibus_necanda_sunt: What I don't get is, we know he has chemical weapons. We know where they are. We haven't had any qualms about folks sending in strike teams to destroy Syrian WMDs before. Why not destroy the production plants and storage bunkers? It would eliminate any chance of the West's red line from being crossed, and allow them to stew in peace*. Russia would breathe a sigh of relief, and Obama can stay out of the Middle East and not look like a hypocrite.


*[inigomontoya.jpg]


Because a lot of the time, when you smash open a big pile of chemical and/or biological weapons with a bomb, you get a big f-ing cloud of chemical/biological agents.  A big f-ing cloud that flies anywhere the wind decides to take it, killing everything in its path.  With a lot of the biological weapons, it's even worse than that.

These things have to be disposed of very carefully, very thoroughly, and with exceeding attention to detail.

This is why Israel is primarily attacking the delivery systems for such weapons instead of the weapons themselves.  Nobody wants a cloud of plague to waft over Tel Aviv.
 
2013-05-05 01:15:51 PM
I got Alzheimers reading this headline
 
2013-05-05 01:17:16 PM
3.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-05-05 01:19:09 PM

Tatsuma: SithLord: Time stamps. It was likely after sundown there. Besides, I wasn't on here yesterday much.

He's right, I posted all day on Friday before sunset and Saturday after sunset

I've been caught by the great internet sleuth! I would have gotten away with it if it wasn't for you meddling kids!

Stone Meadow: October 1973. See Operation Nickel Grass.

By the time the first weapons arrived in Israel, the IDF was deep inside Syrian and Egyptian territory, rolling toward Damascus and Cairo and the war had already been won. Not saying it didn't help, but certainly wasn't a factor in Israel's victory, as we'd already won.


Still caught Mossad sleeping on the job, though.
 
2013-05-05 01:19:57 PM

Tatsuma: Stone Meadow: October 1973. See Operation Nickel Grass.

By the time the first weapons arrived in Israel, the IDF was deep inside Syrian and Egyptian territory, rolling toward Damascus and Cairo and the war had already been won. Not saying it didn't help, but certainly wasn't a factor in Israel's victory, as we'd already won.


The first arrivals of those weapons occurred just 8 days into the war, allowing the IDF to push on and drive home a more decisive victory, which led directly to Camp David and 40 years and counting of regional peace that Israel would not have been able to accomplish on its own.
 
2013-05-05 01:22:42 PM

Tatsuma: akuma976: Wait....whats that Anderson?

I'm being told the initial count of 5 is wrong, it is in fact 6 penises

Anderson would not make such a mistake, he's quite the expert when it comes to multiple penises.


Bah!  Was a bout to make a similar joke about Anderson Cooper's penii expertise.
 
2013-05-05 01:22:47 PM

Stone Meadow: The first arrivals of those weapons occurred just 8 days into the war, allowing the IDF to push on and drive home a more decisive victory, which led directly to Camp David and 40 years and counting of regional peace that Israel would not have been able to accomplish on its own.


You can read in your own link that the shipments first arrived on October 14, but that Israel had already won by the war by that point.
 
2013-05-05 01:24:35 PM
Oh yay.  More violence, good only for continuing the cycle of violence.  This will surely solve all problems in the Middle East.  Nothing can go wrong, right?
 
2013-05-05 01:25:50 PM

Stone Meadow: Tatsuma: Stone Meadow: October 1973. See Operation Nickel Grass.

By the time the first weapons arrived in Israel, the IDF was deep inside Syrian and Egyptian territory, rolling toward Damascus and Cairo and the war had already been won. Not saying it didn't help, but certainly wasn't a factor in Israel's victory, as we'd already won.

The first arrivals of those weapons occurred just 8 days into the war, allowing the IDF to push on and drive home a more decisive victory, which led directly to Camp David and 40 years and counting of regional peace that Israel would not have been able to accomplish on its own.


You either have a very weird definition of peace of are defining a very small region.
 
2013-05-05 01:25:52 PM
Meanwhile, Fox News is busy trying to make Benghazi a scandal.
 
2013-05-05 01:26:02 PM
i290.photobucket.com
 
2013-05-05 01:26:38 PM

radarlove: omnibus_necanda_sunt: What I don't get is, we know he has chemical weapons. We know where they are. We haven't had any qualms about folks sending in strike teams to destroy Syrian WMDs before. Why not destroy the production plants and storage bunkers? It would eliminate any chance of the West's red line from being crossed, and allow them to stew in peace*. Russia would breathe a sigh of relief, and Obama can stay out of the Middle East and not look like a hypocrite.


*[inigomontoya.jpg]

Because a lot of the time, when you smash open a big pile of chemical and/or biological weapons with a bomb, you get a big f-ing cloud of chemical/biological agents.  A big f-ing cloud that flies anywhere the wind decides to take it, killing everything in its path.  With a lot of the biological weapons, it's even worse than that.

These things have to be disposed of very carefully, very thoroughly, and with exceeding attention to detail.

This is why Israel is primarily attacking the delivery systems for such weapons instead of the weapons themselves.  Nobody wants a cloud of plague to waft over Tel Aviv.


Chemical weapons like phosgene and sarin are exceedingly vulnerable to sunlight and moisture. Sarin is also a liquid that relies on proper aerosolizing techniques to be effective.

A thermobaric charge with a magnalium secondary would also leave alkaline residue to further speed the hydrolysis of whatever isn't incinerated immediately.

Bio, I agree with you there.
 
2013-05-05 01:27:23 PM
WTF am I reading?
 
2013-05-05 01:28:08 PM
So, I got an emergency reserve call up for the last two Gaza shindigs... which both happened to coincide with my Mom coming to visit on her own. Guess who's coming to Israel this week?

Anytime after Wednesday is my guess.

/Just kidding. I don't think anyone here is taking it too seriously.
//And anyways, my reserve unit isn't assigned to the North.
///Then again, we weren't technically assigned to the South.
 
2013-05-05 01:29:23 PM

Oldiron_79: WTF am I reading?


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