Do you have adblock enabled?
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Omaha World Herald)   How to stop a dog from attacking your wife? Bite it back   (omaha.com ) divider line
    More: Obvious, Iowa, Dallas County  
•       •       •

4490 clicks; posted to Main » on 03 May 2013 at 10:11 PM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



64 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | » | Newest | Show all

 
2013-05-04 01:58:40 AM  

arcas: The resident who has been caring for the dog said it belongs to a homeless man.
 Of course it does.  It's the pet owner version of "Officer, I wasn't driving!  It was my twin brother!"


So, you feed it,

you own it?
 
2013-05-04 02:05:02 AM  

thisisarepeat: arcas: The resident who has been caring for the dog said it belongs to a homeless man.
 Of course it does.  It's the pet owner version of "Officer, I wasn't driving!  It was my twin brother!"

So, you feed it,

you own it?


The dog will have to pick its owner out of a lineup, then testify in court.

/actually the dog will probably get a nap.
 
2013-05-04 02:13:35 AM  

nytmare: What happened to your face?

[www.wmtw.com image 640x360]

She looks kind of banged up too.


i43.tinypic.com
 
2013-05-04 02:32:12 AM  
encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com

seriously?

for the second time tonight, Fark, I am disappoint
 
2013-05-04 03:19:16 AM  
Why did the dog get to his wife? My wife and I have been in a situation with a dog running at us like in this story. The dog knew full well before he got within 10 feet he was going to have to go through me to get to her. Luckily for the dog, he backed off when I growled at him.
 
2013-05-04 07:55:11 AM  
Man bites kan b nasti...
 
2013-05-04 08:42:41 AM  

Sugarbombs: megarian: I had a part of my nose bit off by a lab mix when I was 12. My nose only has a teeny scar now and my
lips have a small parallel double-scar where the bottom teeth caught my face before clamping on the bridge of my nose.

Labs are the only dogs that make me nervous.

Little yippy dogs don't make me nervous. They just suck. DO YOU HEAR ME, NEIGHBOR?!? SHUT THAT DOG UP!

The big question is... do any dogs like you?  If not, I'd like to isolate the chemical you secrete so I can make a detector to alarm others about your illegitimate disposition.

/if they can detect bombs, they can certainly detect people who shouldn't be part of society


*slowly shuffles away*
 
2013-05-04 08:58:42 AM  
My veterinarian sister and I were talking about this scenario a few days ago. She said the biggest, meanest dog in the world will choke to death if you shove your hand down its throat.


/yuck
 
2013-05-04 11:43:06 AM  
Surprised they got that badly mauled with two people on the attack.  Dogs may be merciless murder machines but humans are actually fairly well built to seriously fark up a dog if the need arises.  Mentally humans have to get past the whole "I can do this but this is going to farking hurt" portion of the fight.  Once they are passed that the dogs pretty screwed.  There was a informative article on handling a dog attack about a year ago posted here.  A wonderful and useful piece that also had the best piece of information for when more than one dog was attacking you.  In the event of attack from a pack of dogs.....you might be farked.
 
2013-05-04 12:33:19 PM  

katerbug72: [2.bp.blogspot.com image 462x352]

Not obscure, just old.


Came here for the World According to Garp references.

"My son is not dog food,"
"Garp bit Bonky"
 
2013-05-04 12:55:34 PM  

Nexus-6: katerbug72: [2.bp.blogspot.com image 462x352]

Not obscure, just old.

Came here for the World According to Garp references.

"My son is not dog food,"
"Garp bit Bonky"


One of my favorite all time movies.

I tried without any luck to find an image of the family Christmas pic with Bonkers wearing his reindeer antlers.

/ if you don't smile, you'll never find a husband...
 
2013-05-04 01:07:11 PM  
Mount it and yell loudly "I AM THE ALPHA MALE!"

//this advice brought to you by harvey birdman, attorney at law..
 
2013-05-04 01:17:04 PM  

SpdrJay: Stick your thumb up its butt....


That's why he was biting me in the first place.
 
2013-05-04 10:48:03 PM  
CSB
My Llahsa apso bit my thumb so hard I had to immediately lay down before passing out.   Granted I was trying to take something out of his mouth but I never expected that amount of pain from a 24 pound dog.  felt like every ounce of blood left my brain probably like fainting.
 
Displayed 14 of 64 comments


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | » | Newest | Show all


View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
On Twitter






In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report