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(Chicago Trib)   Police arrest three teenagers for breaking into a home and attacking a 12 year-old boy with a bottle of ketchup, though the hunt's on for a fourth suspect   (chicagotribune.com ) divider line
    More: Scary, robbery  
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3425 clicks; posted to Main » on 30 Apr 2013 at 12:53 AM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



55 Comments     (+0 »)
 
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2013-04-29 11:41:22 PM  
Have they discovered the motive beheinz this?
 
2013-04-29 11:42:54 PM  
I wonder how they mustard the nerve to do something like this.
 
2013-04-29 11:48:19 PM  
I am just waiting for the other teenagers to condiment this behavior by the extremists!
 
2013-04-29 11:56:02 PM  
I relish the day the 4th gets caught
 
2013-04-30 12:05:10 AM  

dj_bigbird: I relish the day the 4th gets caught


Hopefully they'll ketchup with him by Mayo.

oh, stop groaning
 
2013-04-30 12:16:08 AM  
In prison they'll do him 57 ways.
 
2013-04-30 12:47:07 AM  
lh4.googleusercontent.com
Mastermind behind the whole operation.
 
2013-04-30 12:54:21 AM  
www.foodiggity.com
 
2013-04-30 12:54:31 AM  
OK, I am old and farking jaded, but I totally have to hand it to subby for that tagline. Tomato I'll send you a thank-you card.
 
2013-04-30 12:58:17 AM  
Ham on five, hold the Mayo?
 
2013-04-30 12:58:24 AM  
They used that bottle wrong.
 
2013-04-30 01:00:44 AM  
Where can you even get glass ketchup bottles now?
 
2013-04-30 01:00:52 AM  

utsagrad123: Have they discovered the motive beheinz this?


No, but I'm sure they have their A1 people on it.
 
2013-04-30 01:01:26 AM  
Those kids are due for a 3 month colloidal suspension, and a visit from Edward Woodward, the Homogenizer.
 
2013-04-30 01:01:50 AM  
They should charge the Ketchup company for being an accessory for making it too farking hard to get ketchup out of a glass bottle.
 
2013-04-30 01:02:04 AM  
mayonnaise a lot of sick folk in this world
 
2013-04-30 01:06:12 AM  
<b>AverageAmericanGuy</b> Costco. last I saw. Restaurants grab 'em in bulk.
I agree.
Glass is class.
 
2013-04-30 01:11:16 AM  

AverageAmericanGuy: Where can you even get glass ketchup bottles now?


Publix
 
2013-04-30 01:11:52 AM  

detritus: They should charge the Ketchup company for being an accessory for making it too farking hard to get ketchup out of a glass bottle.


Oh yeah? Dude, it's 2013!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=djwahGRi5iE
 
2013-04-30 01:12:08 AM  
The other guy is probably just hiding in Dijon.
 
2013-04-30 01:12:50 AM  
That, too. Yeah, Publix is a southern thang.
 
2013-04-30 01:13:56 AM  

olddeegee: In prison they'll do him 57 ways.


And he'll have a red ooze coming out
 
2013-04-30 01:13:58 AM  
I'm relishing all these puns.
 
2013-04-30 01:14:16 AM  
Apparently the suspect Heinz well
 
2013-04-30 01:15:47 AM  
So...it has come to this. They should be condimenteth to hell.
 
2013-04-30 01:22:51 AM  
Kids got some sauce.
 
2013-04-30 01:24:31 AM  

Boojum2k: Kids got some sauce.


Dude, gross, he's 12
 
2013-04-30 01:28:01 AM  

Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: Boojum2k: Kids got some sauce.

Dude, gross, he's 12


When I was 12 I'd have just told them "Umami"
 
2013-04-30 01:31:21 AM  
I hope the police don't tabasco in the limelight too long.

/Yeah I know. It's bad and I feel bad.
 
2013-04-30 01:42:23 AM  

TheTurtle: OK, I am old and farking jaded, but I totally have to hand it to subby for that tagline. Tomato I'll send you a thank-you card.


I really liked how the pun seemed subtle. Hunt wasn't capitalized; was waiting for Mia Wallace Fox Force Five level cheese once I saw ketchup bottle.
 
2013-04-30 01:43:07 AM  
LOL damn you subby

+1
 
2013-04-30 01:48:11 AM  

AverageAmericanGuy: Where can you even get glass ketchup bottles now?


My local Safeway has this limited edition Jalapeno-flavored ketchup in a glass bottle. It's quite tasty.
 
2013-04-30 01:49:16 AM  
That's not the way to get ahead in life.
 
2013-04-30 01:52:38 AM  
"The local police department released a statement following the incident saying Mr. A remains in custody, but does not appear to have any mental problems."
Well, just maybe they can start considering that he might have some. What does one have to do in Korea to appear to have mental problems?
 
2013-04-30 01:52:51 AM  
Whenever the perp is caught, he'll be in quite a pickle.
 
2013-04-30 01:53:53 AM  
Oops, posted on wrong thread.
Sorry
 
2013-04-30 01:57:11 AM  

detritus: They should charge the Ketchup company for being an accessory for making it too farking hard to get ketchup out of a glass bottle.



Agreed. Ketchup related attacks, according to my research, have increased by 100% in 2013 alone and the year isn't even half way over. Congress needs to step up to the plate and get these dangerous items out of the hands of criminals. We should start with background checks and strict limits on ounce capacity, it's the only way we'll stay safe!
 
2013-04-30 02:37:46 AM  
To find the fourth suspect, they'll take the other three suspects into the interrogation room and grill them for information.
 
2013-04-30 03:04:23 AM  
I'm sure they're regretting this in heinz site.
 
2013-04-30 03:13:31 AM  
Mojado crotch fruit are the worst vermin in our society. Hopefully the dishes were done afterwards.
 
2013-04-30 03:17:30 AM  
I hope they tartar and feather the mustards who did this.
 
2013-04-30 03:22:51 AM  
Did they poke him in the Heinz with it?
 
2013-04-30 03:39:34 AM  

milsorgen: detritus: They should charge the Ketchup company for being an accessory for making it too farking hard to get ketchup out of a glass bottle.


Agreed. Ketchup related attacks, according to my research, have increased by 100% in 2013 alone and the year isn't even half way over. Congress needs to step up to the plate and get these dangerous items out of the hands of criminals. We should start with background checks and strict limits on ounce capacity, it's the only way we'll stay safe!


We must ban Glock AR-47 tactical assault ketchup!
 
2013-04-30 03:44:42 AM  
As long as we're talking about condiments, I'll just leave this here...

thepepperpot.co
 
2013-04-30 03:47:19 AM  
Anticipation, it's making me wait.
 
2013-04-30 04:07:35 AM  
The lack of a capital H in Hunt's in the headline is making me all unnecessarily itchy..
 
2013-04-30 04:18:18 AM  
Of course ketchup is just the modern spelling of what was originally cat soup.
farm4.static.flickr.com
 
2013-04-30 06:28:43 AM  
s22.postimg.org
 
2013-04-30 07:03:31 AM  

Lorelle: dj_bigbird: I relish the day the 4th gets caught

Hopefully they'll ketchup with him by Mayo.

oh, stop groaning


For shame.

\I laughed anyway
 
2013-04-30 07:48:57 AM  

DarkSoulNoHope: To find the fourth suspect, they'll take the other three suspects into the interrogation room and grill them for information.


And while the three turned out somewhat respectful, the forth will be quite saucy.
 
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