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(Longmont Times-Call)   Fark-ready headline: "Longmont police: Naked, drinking woman in custody for her own good"   (timescall.com) divider line 18
    More: Amusing, Longmont, Longmont police  
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4578 clicks; posted to Main » on 29 Apr 2013 at 8:20 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-04-29 08:25:43 AM
Oh, longmont. How I miss ye.
 
2013-04-29 08:26:31 AM
Drunk, naked, and middle-aged is no way to go through life, lady.
 
2013-04-29 08:27:21 AM
Surprised the case wasn't closed for lack of suspects.
 
2013-04-29 08:32:50 AM

Scrotumnal Equinox: Surprised the case wasn't closed for lack of suspects.


Gotta give them credit for efficiency.
 
2013-04-29 08:39:55 AM
I think the cops SHOT the last naked crazy lady they came across, so, yeah, I'm okay with this.
 
2013-04-29 08:41:13 AM
Mom?
 
2013-04-29 08:47:43 AM
Ttiwwop. (Probably not though)
 
2013-04-29 09:13:47 AM
YAY! Now we're getting close to home!
 
2013-04-29 09:37:24 AM

farkingbubbler: Ttiwwop. (Probably not though)


No. Women arrested for bring naked are never worth pictures. If she was cute, the cops wouldn't arrest her.
 
2013-04-29 09:40:02 AM
A woman was walking naked in public with an open container of alcohol at 7:50 p.m. Saturday on the 1200 block of South Hover Street, police said. The 45-year-old was taken in to protective custody.

and

Two small children were left in a car for more than 20 minutes Saturday in a parking lot on the 2200 block of East Ken Pratt Boulevard, police said. Police are looking for an Erie woman who left the scene of the incident.

Mystery solved.
 
2013-04-29 09:41:29 AM

Speaker2Animals: farkingbubbler: Ttiwwop. (Probably not though)

No. Women arrested for bring naked are never worth pictures. If she was cute, the cops wouldn't arrest her.


They might've took her into temporary police custody that doesn't involve jail or paper work and she is home after a couple hours.
 
2013-04-29 09:56:16 AM
Why were the police naked and drinking a woman in custody?  How do you even drink a woman?  Is this some sort of weird cannibalistic police action?
 
2013-04-29 11:45:34 AM

wambu: A woman was walking naked in public with an open container of alcohol at 7:50 p.m. Saturday on the 1200 block of South Hover Street, police said. The 45-year-old was taken in to protective custody.

and

Two small children were left in a car for more than 20 minutes Saturday in a parking lot on the 2200 block of East Ken Pratt Boulevard, police said. Police are looking for an Erie woman who left the scene of the incident.

Mystery solved.


I lived in Erie when going to University. Dirt streets. Train tracks for the coal trains. My next door neighbor was 80+ and went to the cemetery at night to collect ribbons off the new flowers. When she died, 212 shoe boxes full of funeral wreath ribbons were found in her basement. Along with 100+ shoeboxes of neatly folded and ironed Hershey Bar wrappers. What was not found was the rumored stash of pre-FDR gold $20 coins.

There was, hoever, a large recently dug hole in the dirt crawl space, and no one ever saw her handyman/gardner ever again. Who always waxed poetic about wanting to go home to Italy. She once told me, with an evil wink, that she would coat her grandchildren's fingers with honey and give them a feather to play with. And I know she always carried a canned salmon sandwich in her apron pocket wherever she went.

Other than that, Erie was like watching an archeological dig. Longmont I remember for the smell of the 'turkey plant' and the stench of the beet sugar plant. Which smell was like burning wet diapers in a 50 gallon poil drum.

FTA - she probably looked like Granny on Beverly Hillbillys; not like Julianne Hough.
 
2013-04-29 12:32:41 PM
What impressed me is that she reached such a state before 8PM.  I would think the naked drunken ramblings wouldn't start occurring until after midnight.

Clemkadidlefark:

I lived in Erie when going to University. Dirt streets. Train tracks for the coal trains. My next door neighbor was 80+ and went to the cemetery at night to collect ribbons off the new flowers. When she died, 212 shoe boxes full of funeral wreath ribbons were found in her basement. Along with 100+ shoeboxes of neatly folded and ironed Hershey Bar wrappers. What was not found was the rumored stash of pre-FDR gold $20 coins.

There was, hoever, a large recently dug hole in the dirt crawl space, and no one ever saw her handyman/gardner ever again. Who always waxed poetic about wanting to go home to Italy. She once told me, with an evil wink, that she would coat her grandchildren's fingers with honey and give them a feather to play with. And I know she always carried a canned salmon sandwich in her apron pocket wherever she went.


OK, several things there make me wonder.
1. What was in the hole?
2. Who wanted to go to Italy, the old bat or the gardener?
3. What's the significance of the honey-fingers and a feather?

Forgive me. I'm slow.  I'm a government contractor.
 
2013-04-29 01:22:52 PM

Clemkadidlefark: wambu: A woman was walking naked in public with an open container of alcohol at 7:50 p.m. Saturday on the 1200 block of South Hover Street, police said. The 45-year-old was taken in to protective custody.

and

Two small children were left in a car for more than 20 minutes Saturday in a parking lot on the 2200 block of East Ken Pratt Boulevard, police said. Police are looking for an Erie woman who left the scene of the incident.

Mystery solved.

I lived in Erie when going to University. Dirt streets. Train tracks for the coal trains. My next door neighbor was 80+ and went to the cemetery at night to collect ribbons off the new flowers. When she died, 212 shoe boxes full of funeral wreath ribbons were found in her basement. Along with 100+ shoeboxes of neatly folded and ironed Hershey Bar wrappers. What was not found was the rumored stash of pre-FDR gold $20 coins.

There was, hoever, a large recently dug hole in the dirt crawl space, and no one ever saw her handyman/gardner ever again. Who always waxed poetic about wanting to go home to Italy. She once told me, with an evil wink, that she would coat her grandchildren's fingers with honey and give them a feather to play with. And I know she always carried a canned salmon sandwich in her apron pocket wherever she went.

Other than that, Erie was like watching an archeological dig. Longmont I remember for the smell of the 'turkey plant' and the stench of the beet sugar plant. Which smell was like burning wet diapers in a 50 gallon poil drum.

FTA - she probably looked like Granny on Beverly Hillbillys; not like Julianne Hough.


There are questions that should never be asked.  That's all you need to know.
 
2013-04-29 02:53:56 PM
I'm thinking Oskar Blues, which is near there.  That's a super busy road.
Also, Clemkadidlefark  would not recognize Erie now.  It's quite suburban.  Who ever thought that Longmont would have a bedroom community?
 
2013-04-29 05:23:30 PM

tennessee.hillbilly: What impressed me is that she reached such a state before 8PM.  I would think the naked drunken ramblings wouldn't start occurring until after midnight.

Clemkadidlefark:

I lived in Erie when going to University. Dirt streets. Train tracks for the coal trains. My next door neighbor was 80+ and went to the cemetery at night to collect ribbons off the new flowers. When she died, 212 shoe boxes full of funeral wreath ribbons were found in her basement. Along with 100+ shoeboxes of neatly folded and ironed Hershey Bar wrappers. What was not found was the rumored stash of pre-FDR gold $20 coins.

There was, hoever, a large recently dug hole in the dirt crawl space, and no one ever saw her handyman/gardner ever again. Who always waxed poetic about wanting to go home to Italy. She once told me, with an evil wink, that she would coat her grandchildren's fingers with honey and give them a feather to play with. And I know she always carried a canned salmon sandwich in her apron pocket wherever she went.

OK, several things there make me wonder.
1. What was in the hole?
2. Who wanted to go to Italy, the old bat or the gardener?
3. What's the significance of the honey-fingers and a feather?

Forgive me. I'm slow.  I'm a government contractor.


Hole - don't know. The town, all 350 people, were pretty sure the gold was buried there

Gardner wanted to go home to Italy. I first hand heard him whine about it any number of times

Honey/Feather - put some on your fingers and have somebody hand you a feather. You'll be occupied a lot of the day trying to get rid of it. (occupy the children)

/Old Bat was old Bat
 
2013-04-29 05:30:56 PM

Sugarloafer: I'm thinking Oskar Blues, which is near there.  That's a super busy road.
Also, Clemkadidlefark  would not recognize Erie now.  It's quite suburban.  Who ever thought that Longmont would have a bedroom community?


Google Map'd it a while back.

Holy Mother of God, how the hell did that happen. Erie is on fire underground. No, seriously. From just south of Louisville to just north of Erie and to the East. Coal mines down under there. That's why the Italian emigre population you'd see in the taverns and bars in Louisville. Came over to work the coal mines, but then the mines caught fire ... burning that seam deep deep.

Wow. Good luck living over that. Apparently real estate development trumps everything, including good sense.
 
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