If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Tampa Bay Online)   While it's always neat to get your name in the paper, you should really hope the story doesn't involve the phrase "elevator mishap"   (tbo.com) divider line 55
    More: Sad, elevator mishap, St. Pete Beach, Tampa International Airport, elevators, Pinellas County Sheriff's Office, phrases  
•       •       •

6070 clicks; posted to Main » on 25 Apr 2013 at 4:14 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



55 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all
 
2013-04-25 03:33:11 PM  
I would just like it if people could call me "Sir" without the "you are making a scene".
 
2013-04-25 03:50:22 PM  
Actually I'd have to believe that it would be worse if the phrase used the word "anal" with mishap and/or misadventure.

I don't quite now how "anal" and "elevator" would work, but I don't know that it would be the result of anything positive.

Come to think of it, newspaper articles which mention your name along with "anal" are generally a bad thing.
 
2013-04-25 04:09:43 PM  
...vacuuming oil out of the bottom of the shaft, according to authorities.

Well isn't he Mr. Fancy?  What happened to a plain old tissue or washcloth?
 
2013-04-25 04:17:45 PM  

Diogenes: ...vacuuming oil out of the bottom of the shaft, according to authorities.

Well isn't he Mr. Fancy?  What happened to a plain old tissue or washcloth?


That just seems dangerous. I can't help thinking of the Chuck Palawhatever story 'Guts'.
 
2013-04-25 04:18:18 PM  
Another phrase you don't want to see in relation to your name is "dead".
 
2013-04-25 04:18:19 PM  
Agrees!

img2-2.timeinc.net
 
2013-04-25 04:18:35 PM  
He was on Shindler's list.
 
2013-04-25 04:20:07 PM  
 The pair had been servicing the elevator for about 40 minutes when it happened.


That elevator has pretty good staying power.
 
2013-04-25 04:21:47 PM  
Mark Allen Johnson, 45, worked for SWS Environmental Services

I guess you could say...

...he got the shaft.


/yeeeeeaaaahhhhhh
 
2013-04-25 04:22:00 PM  
"Onto some bullets" is also a phrase that hopefully will not appear.

/Obscure?
 
2013-04-25 04:22:02 PM  
+1 Subby
 
2013-04-25 04:25:32 PM  

Noticeably F.A.T.: Diogenes: ...vacuuming oil out of the bottom of the shaft, according to authorities.

Well isn't he Mr. Fancy?  What happened to a plain old tissue or washcloth?

That just seems dangerous. I can't help thinking of the Chuck Palawhatever story 'Guts'.


No, no, no, no, no.


/no.
 
2013-04-25 04:26:41 PM  
Being questioned-
www.sveinnstorm.com
 
2013-04-25 04:27:11 PM  
Remember, kids... "LOTO - Lock Out Tag Out", it's not just a phrase, it's a way of life (or death).
 
2013-04-25 04:27:21 PM  
That's only slightly better than:

"found hanging in closet with pants around ankles"
 
2013-04-25 04:30:57 PM  

Dimensio


"Onto some bullets" is also a phrase that hopefully will not appear.

/Obscure?


No. Shut up, Snake.
 
2013-04-25 04:33:48 PM  
Didn't pass up the opportunity to drag someone's name through the mud in an unrelated story:

Last month, a Pennsylvania man fell to his death at Tampa International Airport. Investigators still have not conclusively said how 31-year-old Chad Wolfe fell down the shaft of the No. 21 elevator at the Armstrong Blue section of the airport, though airport police have said Wolfe may have tried to pry open the elevator door on the short-term parking garage's seventh floor. Airport officials said Wolfe may have been under the influence of drugs and alcohol after arriving from Atlanta, and state inspectors, after examining the elevator, noted that a locking device was broken on the elevator door leading to the shaft.
 

-Johnson!  I need 250 words about this.  150 on the story, and then I want you to use the last 100 making fun of my dead brother in law

-Sure thing, chief.
 
2013-04-25 04:37:53 PM  
Not NEARLY as horrifying as what happened to Hitoshi Nikaidoh in Houston in 2003.

WARNING: story is gruesome.

Click if you dare:   Catching Elevators
 
2013-04-25 04:38:24 PM  
I was mentioned in The Guardian once.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/news/blog/2007/sep/21/peaceday1

No elevators though.
 
2013-04-25 04:42:45 PM  
Mine was "freak gardening accident". Crazy what happens around raised beds. Poor sod. I understand he was a drummer.
 
2013-04-25 04:47:07 PM  
www.chilloutpoint.com
 
2013-04-25 04:47:16 PM  
Reminds me of the beginning of that Six Feet Under episode where the dude gets caught in the elevator doors and gets sliced in half.
 
2013-04-25 04:49:15 PM  
I'd prefer making the paper due to a "snack related mishap".
1.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-04-25 04:50:16 PM  
The most hilarious elevator death ever.


/What did he think was behind the doors?
 
2013-04-25 04:54:14 PM  

MythDragon: The most hilarious elevator death ever.


/What did he think was behind the doors?


I failed trying to not laugh at what I just saw.  You make me feel like a terrible person.
 
2013-04-25 04:55:40 PM  

rkiller1: He was on Shindler's list.


Shindler's lift
 
2013-04-25 04:57:25 PM  
You ever get onto an elevator and out of pure boredom you pretend to read the certificate on the wall signed by the guy who supposedly inspected the elevator for safety compliance? I wonder if that flashed through the guy's mind right before he died...
/Otis
 
2013-04-25 04:58:15 PM  
Not sure this is relevant, but when I did CCTV installs during rough construction, we usualy arived later and worked after the other construction people left. It was easier with everyone out of the way.

Anyway I like pissing in the elevator shafts. Not sure why, I guess was just being a dick. Dropped a deuce down there once.
 
2013-04-25 04:58:45 PM  

eraser8: Not NEARLY as horrifying as what happened to Hitoshi Nikaidoh in Houston in 2003.

WARNING: story is gruesome.

Click if you dare:   Catching Elevators


Came here to add this.

Also this.

Remind me to never take a Houston elevator.
 
TWX
2013-04-25 04:59:33 PM  
How does this happen, was the second man's job to keep pushing the buttons for the upper floors?

And no, Mystery Men is not obscure.

/sold my property to pay property taxes
 
2013-04-25 05:00:50 PM  
What being crushed by an elevator might look like.
img src=img69.imageshack.us
 
2013-04-25 05:01:56 PM  

MythDragon: The most hilarious elevator death ever.


/What did he think was behind the doors?


Darwin salutes you, sir!
 
2013-04-25 05:02:35 PM  
BTW, do not do a GIS for "crushed by elevator" unless you like blood and gore (which I know some of you do)..
 
2013-04-25 05:05:42 PM  

I_Am_Weasel: Actually I'd have to believe that it would be worse if the phrase used the word "anal" with mishap and/or misadventure.

I don't quite now how "anal" and "elevator" would work, but I don't know that it would be the result of anything positive.

Come to think of it, newspaper articles which mention your name along with "anal" are generally a bad thing.


That's why they used the phrase, "vacuuming oil out of the bottom of the shaft".
 
2013-04-25 05:07:27 PM  

WalMartian: rkiller1: He was on Shindler's list.

Shindler's lift


His name was Otis.
 
2013-04-25 05:11:30 PM  
Death by misadventure is definitely what you don't want on your death certificate.
 
2013-04-25 05:26:12 PM  
A guy a knew in high school nearly killed himself through some jackassery... the newspaper's sub-headline for the story was "Stupidity Cited".

Darwin missed his chance there.
 
2013-04-25 05:29:02 PM  

TXEric: Remember, kids... "LOTO - Lock Out Tag Out", it's not just a phrase, it's a way of life (or death).


The article seems to indicate that they did that but something went wrong anyways.
 
2013-04-25 05:29:57 PM  

eraser8: Not NEARLY as horrifying as what happened to Hitoshi Nikaidoh in Houston in 2003.

WARNING: story is gruesome.

Click if you dare:   Catching Elevators


I avoid elevators when possible or reasonable.
I don't walk up or down 20 floors, but it's discouraging to see all the fatties waiting for the elevator to up or down 1 floor.
Escalators are OK, I can walk or run up them.
 
2013-04-25 05:32:02 PM  

MythDragon: The most hilarious elevator death ever.


/What did he think was behind the doors?


I've seen that before, but I never heard the story behind it.
 
2013-04-25 05:39:16 PM  

Banned on the Run: eraser8: Not NEARLY as horrifying as what happened to Hitoshi Nikaidoh in Houston in 2003.

WARNING: story is gruesome.

Click if you dare:   Catching Elevators

Came here to add this.

Also this.

Remind me to never take a Houston elevator.


At least not during a hurricane/flood.
 
2013-04-25 06:05:16 PM  
Gotta split!
images1.wikia.nocookie.net
 
2013-04-25 06:43:47 PM  

impaler: MythDragon: The most hilarious elevator death ever.


/What did he think was behind the doors?

I've seen that before, but I never heard the story behind it.


South Korea shopping mall
 
2013-04-25 07:59:53 PM  

Brick-House: Agrees!


Nice!

Our age is showing
 
2013-04-25 08:04:42 PM  

Nana's Vibrator: MythDragon: The most hilarious elevator death ever.


/What did he think was behind the doors?

I failed trying to not laugh at what I just saw.  You make me feel like a terrible person.


The person behind him (you see the shadow) who doesn't even bother to check on him, that person should feel like a terrible person
 
2013-04-25 08:21:31 PM  

MythDragon: The most hilarious elevator death ever.


/What did he think was behind the doors?


Thanks for sharing  that!

Yay! Darwin
 
2013-04-25 08:25:22 PM  

Banned on the Run: eraser8: Not NEARLY as horrifying as what happened to Hitoshi Nikaidoh in Houston in 2003.

WARNING: story is gruesome.

Click if you dare:   Catching Elevators

Came here to add this.

Also this.

Remind me to never take a Houston elevator.


Now that one is truly nightmarish. Remind me to take the stairs if there is flooding!
 
2013-04-25 08:35:10 PM  
Banned on the Run:
Also this.
Remind me to never take a Houston elevator.

"
Houston Mayor Lee Brown said one of the deaths was a woman who drowned in a downtown office building when an elevator took her into a flooded basement. "

That is some straight up Final Destination shiat lol. Then again, so are most of the stories in this thread. For some reason, this one seems particularly horrible, though.

/Afraid of drowning.
 
2013-04-25 08:35:17 PM  
I read that headline in the voice of Jack Handy.
 
2013-04-25 09:22:05 PM  
I had an uncle who owned an elevator repair company. I asked him one day "How's business?" and he said, "Oh, OK, it has ________________ ."

(it's fill-in-the-blank night)
 
Displayed 50 of 55 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report