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(Daily Mail)   Winning: Dear Cir, do U have NE nice eZ jobs 4 me 2 do?   (dailymail.co.uk) divider line 174
    More: Sad, mr cameron, SMS language, mobile apps  
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17379 clicks; posted to Main » on 25 Apr 2013 at 12:24 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-04-25 01:06:45 PM
Who thinks that this is new? Finding literate employees has been an issue for as long as I remember. I managed a record department at an electronics retailer and I remember a guy in the late 70s who brought his girlfriend to an interview, kept his arm around her the whole time, and when I left the room for a moment they were making out. Idiocy among the 20 somethings and under isn't new.
 
2013-04-25 01:08:07 PM

Grapple: radarlove: Meanwhile, I can't even find a job at the gas station around the corner.  Thanks, illiterate teens!

At least the fad of ~~~~AlTeRnAtInG CaPs AnD TiLdEs~~~~ died.

No, now it's all #hastags

#OMG#I#cant#believe#you#didnt#know#that#job#life#wut#lol



#FromNowOn #IVow #AllMyTweets will be #OnlyHashtags. #WithLuck #WeCan #OverWhelmTheSystem and #PutAnEnd to #AllThisSillyness
 
2013-04-25 01:09:15 PM

A Shambling Mound: This would be more amusing if it wasn't something I actually had to deal with on a daily basis.


Sadly, this.
My company is 98% recent undergraduates OR "university co-ops" ... The latter is some kind of Canadian slang I don't completely understand. Intern, maybe? Forget emails with any kind of proper punctuation or, hell, sentence structure.

.... Don't get me started on the hundreds of emails I get a day that simply say "see attchged". WHAT DOES THIS MEAN?! WHY?! And where is your spell check?!
 
2013-04-25 01:09:49 PM
My company sent me a girl that is going to be a singer, dancer, actress, own a studio, a salon, a production company and restuarants. She cant even scan a barcode right or show up on time. I brought up the fact that how is she going to do all that stuff if she cant even show up on time and do a simple job here. Her response is "Well I want to do those jobs.".

Last year my roomate was "dating" a guy that wouldnt just get "any job" he had a list of demands that needed to be met. When I heard them I had a nice laugh. He had about a sememster of college, not really any other skill and wanted starting pay of $60k. I guess you can wait for that dream job when you live with your mom.

But I have seen some hope in the younger folks I've helped to promote three that come to work and, get ready for the shocker, work. Dont get much gripes from them other than they get bored when its slow. So Ive trained them to do parts of my job. One day I came in and they took it upon themselves to clean the vans out. The boss saw the mess left by the drivers and went off on them.
 
2013-04-25 01:10:49 PM

PanicMan: Clearly this is all the fault of the young people.  In no way are their parents, the schools, or the media in any way culpable.


When I was in school (I graduated in 1997), we used a form of short hand for notes to each other as well as for taking notes.  In many ways it could be seen as the grandfather of text speech (C.U.L8r for example, or using 4 to mean four, for or fore, so one and so forth).  My teachers made it clear that essays (not just in English, but in all classes) were to be written with everything properly spelled out, and some even went so far as to explain that when filling out a job application, abbreviations were rarely accepted, so our short hand wasn't going to be accepted either.  I did an essay in the 9th grade for a science class assignment and my dad found it before I turned it in and told me to sit down and redo it.  Some of the things he pointed out was "Say 'Half way through...' and not '1/2 way through...'." and others, but that was honestly the only part I remember.

Maybe I was the exception.  Maybe the school I went to in Texas did a better job than other locations of teaching students when it isn't acceptable to use any form of text speech.  Maybe I had parents who were odd for not wanting me to sound like an idiot when I wrote.  Maybe I was odd for remembering what I was taught in school and by my parents and not pointlessly using text speech on important things like job applications.
 
2013-04-25 01:11:28 PM
Most people are idiots and unqualified for most non-menial jobs. News at 11.
 
2013-04-25 01:12:42 PM

Great Janitor


I used to do hiring for a company. I hated it. Most people, you call, offering a job interview, they're happy and excited. Some act like it's an honor for me to even speak to them, and want the job interview over the phone. The interviews were fun, mostly. Some applications were horrible. Anyone with text speak on their application were given the five minute and out the door interview.


I'm curious: why would you take the time to interview them at all? The odds of success seem fairly low.
 
2013-04-25 01:13:39 PM
They learned their communication skills by reading the comments on YouTube?
 
2013-04-25 01:14:16 PM

PanicMan: Clearly this is all the fault of the young people.  In no way are their parents, the schools, or the media in any way culpable.


Cut that shiat. I had a weird and frightening childhood which seriously compromised my abilty to use a good mind in a school setting. It didn't matter. I read everything because I wanted to know everything. Nothing stands in the way of a mind that wants to learn. Kids these days don't even have to walk to the library. Maybe that's the problem - perhaps knowledge seems cheap.
 
2013-04-25 01:15:09 PM
Everybody knows the best EZ job is being the guy inside the RedBox DVD machines ! You get a TV,  and a fridge and all you have to do is push DVDs out the slot !   Just knock on one and yell loudly to them that you want a job over and over again and they will push an application out the slot for you.
 
2013-04-25 01:15:26 PM

iheartscotch: Imma gonna wear my regular street clothes


Boomers wear their regular street clothes to work, why shouldn't everyone else?
 
2013-04-25 01:19:30 PM

Teknowaffle: 70% of them list "being on time almost everyday" as a reason that they are valuable employees


The article just said that a significant proportion of applicants can't show up on time. Either it's an important skill that contributes to their value as an employee or you don't get to whine about it when they don't show up on time.
 
2013-04-25 01:20:51 PM
On another note, I recently sent my third line manager (my bosses bosses boss) an email that began

Goof morning
 
2013-04-25 01:21:30 PM
Partner works in HR at a newspaper.  Get about 20 CV's for the "Arts" section every day.

/everyone and their dog has a degree in communications now.
 
2013-04-25 01:21:46 PM
Many employers are desperate to recruit, but say they are confronted by candidates who apply for jobs in 'text speak' and cannot even turn up punctually for an interview, according to the report from the Chartered Institute of Personnel and Development.

god forbid those employers hire anyone for more than minimum wage because it's surprising just how little you get in return for how little you pay them or how little you paid in taxes for their education.

god forbid those employers hire an adult that has expectations of a real living wage in exchange for decades of experience.

They know what they're doing, I say let 'em crash
 
2013-04-25 01:21:47 PM
Had to poke around Google for a bit but I found the original report: http://www.educationandemployers.org/media/18037/nothing_in_common_fi n al.pdf

/Article fails at citing sources
 
2013-04-25 01:22:41 PM

Englebert Slaptyback: Great Janitor

I used to do hiring for a company. I hated it. Most people, you call, offering a job interview, they're happy and excited. Some act like it's an honor for me to even speak to them, and want the job interview over the phone. The interviews were fun, mostly. Some applications were horrible. Anyone with text speak on their application were given the five minute and out the door interview.


I'm curious: why would you take the time to interview them at all? The odds of success seem fairly low.


The first time that happened, I pointed to the application and resume, both in text speech, and I told her that I would reschedule, had a busy day full of meetings, apologized and asked her to leave.  She called for a week straight trying to get that interview rescheduled.  I told her that the position had been filled, her Weeners was "Was it because I'm black?"  So I decided from that point forward, interview everyone who showed up, a quick five minute interview and saying "If we decide to hire you, we'll call you."  is a better way of doing things than just kicking them out the door.  Plus, that five minute interview was the fun one when I knew I wasn't going to be hiring that person: "So, what can you bring to this company that others can't?"  "Why was your first job at 17 and not at 16?"  "Pretend that I'm a deaf Eskimo, using only words, sell me on yellow snow.  I know this isn't a sales position, but I need to know your customer service and ability to up sell."
 
2013-04-25 01:23:22 PM

profplump


The article just said that a significant proportion of applicants can't show up on time. Either it's an important skill that contributes to their value as an employee or you don't get to whine about it when they don't show up on time.


It must be difficult to walk around with pants on your head.
 
2013-04-25 01:24:16 PM

jonewer: On another note, I recently sent my third line manager (my bosses bosses boss's boss's boss) an email that began

Goof morning


FTFY
 
2013-04-25 01:25:32 PM

MichiganFTL: It's working out well so far buddy. It's easier to train people with no experience than to untrain people with bad habits. It's allowed us to move to 6 states and double our workforce in 12 months, so I'm sorry we don't fit into your 'doomed for failure' mold.


I'm not your buddy, pal.  However, I'm glad that your business is so successful that you don't care how much it costs to train people, and that you don't care what happens to them after you spend all that time and money training them.  Since you have virtually no one employed at your business who is over 30, they must move on pretty quickly.
 
2013-04-25 01:28:22 PM

Great Janitor


The first time that happened, I pointed to the application and resume, both in text speech, and I told her that I would reschedule, had a busy day full of meetings, apologized and asked her to leave. She called for a week straight trying to get that interview rescheduled. I told her that the position had been filled, her Weeners was "Was it because I'm black?"


Ah, so people show up in person to apply? I was thinking you received resumes via email and was wondering why you would bring them on-site when their stuff was all txty.


So I decided from that point forward, interview everyone who showed up, a quick five minute interview and saying "If we decide to hire you, we'll call you." is a better way of doing things than just kicking them out the door. Plus, that five minute interview was the fun one when I knew I wasn't going to be hiring that person: "So, what can you bring to this company that others can't?" "Why was your first job at 17 and not at 16?" "Pretend that I'm a deaf Eskimo, using only words, sell me on yellow snow. I know this isn't a sales position, but I need to know your customer service and ability to up sell."


That made sense for a little while and then it turned kind of weird.
 
2013-04-25 01:33:24 PM

profplump: iheartscotch: Imma gonna wear my regular street clothes

Boomers wear their regular street clothes to work, why shouldn't everyone else?


Regular street clothes for boomers consist of a button-down shirt, dress slacks and dress shoes, possibly a tie. If you wear that stuff regularly; you'll be alright. I'm just saying you might want to save your favorite MEGADEATH shirt for some other time.
 
2013-04-25 01:34:21 PM

profplump: Teknowaffle: 70% of them list "being on time almost everyday" as a reason that they are valuable employees

The article just said that a significant proportion of applicants can't show up on time. Either it's an important skill that contributes to their value as an employee or you don't get to whine about it when they don't show up on time.


She was saying that back when she founded her company, that was just something you did, and didn't expect a farking cookie for it.

Perhaps you didn't understand my post was a CSB
 
2013-04-25 01:34:40 PM
like when Cousin Eddie is still unemployed because he's holding out for a management position.
 
2013-04-25 01:36:09 PM
How long before "Idiocracy" becomes reality?
 
2013-04-25 01:37:10 PM
Sometimes I wonder about where people were led wrong growing up as to what is appropriate behavior for applying for and keeping jobs. I know that I've managed to walk into several interviews and leave with a job offer simply because I showed up in a suit and was well-spoken and literate throughout. Having a high-end skill set and design experience certainly helps but doesn't mean a thing if I were to show up looking like a hobolo.

I also like Friday's, I put on a full suit and tie for Friday as the reactions are usually hilarious.
 
2013-04-25 01:38:19 PM

StickyBunBandit: How long before "Idiocracy" becomes reality?


We've already elected Obama, so there's that.
 
2013-04-25 01:38:41 PM

natmar_76: I've heard the same thing regarding medical school applicants. Supposedly the newest generation of applicants lacks professionalism and appropriate interpersonal skills.


i.imgur.com
 
2013-04-25 01:40:22 PM

SithLord: StickyBunBandit: How long before "Idiocracy" becomes reality?

We've already elected Obama, so there's that.


He's no Dwayne Elizondo Mountain Dew Herbert Camacho but I think we did well. The next one better be firing off assault rifles and constantly drinking though.

...maybe we should finally elect Palin.
 
2013-04-25 01:41:42 PM
When I used to manage restaurants, we would hire almost anyone.  The thought process was this - If you are willing to learn, we can turn you into a fine/upscale dining waiter or waitress.  I really did not discriminate based off the clothes they wore, often because they would simply come in for an application and if I or another manager was free, we'd often asked them if we could interview them on the spot.  That being said...

If you came in and asked to fill out an application and also asked for a pen...yeah...no, we are not hiring you.  I learned this mentality from another manager that I worked with in the past.  His philosophy was that to get a job as a waiter, all you really need is to not look like you are strung out and on a week long binger,  wear somewhat appropriate clothing, and HAVE A FARKING PEN ON YOU TO FILL OUT THE DAMN APP!!!

So when someone came in for a job application and asked for a pen, we answered this way:

"Why do you not have a pen on you if you knew you were job hunting today?  Look, I will give you a pen, I have to let you fill out the application by law, but I can tell you this much, I will not be reviewing your app or calling you back to schedule an interview."

Often they would look confused and ask why, to which we would respond:

"You came in here with the express purpose of filling out a job application, aside from making yourself presentable, your only other requirement is to fill out the app...the fact that you lack the foresight to understand that you need a pen shows me that you are ill equipped to handle even the most mundane of tasks here."

99/100 times they would just leave.
 
2013-04-25 01:45:49 PM
While this is an actual issue, the "casualization" of the workplace is definitely a contributing factor. I remember showing up for an interview to work as an order picker at a cold storage warehouse one summer. I wore a sweater over an oxford with some chinos and boots. The receptionist had on jeans and a sweatshirt.

Also remember the person teaching me during orientation saying that turnover was ridiculously high. I suggested he post the opening on the state's service for the unemployed as it's an awesome resource. Said he'd never heard of it. I also suggested that the high starting wage was attractive, but probably not enough to keep someone around with the deluge of overtime hours (70+ weeks were common) people had to work. He was completely dismissive and scoffed at the idea. I left after not getting a single weekend day off (Like I was scheduled to.) for 3 weeks. When browsing for jobs in the winter break, they were listed on the service I recommended with a higher wage. Just kind of a slap in the face after being mistreated pretty badly by the business.
 
2013-04-25 01:45:53 PM
Englebert Slaptyback: Great Janitor

The first time that happened, I pointed to the application and resume, both in text speech, and I told her that I would reschedule, had a busy day full of meetings, apologized and asked her to leave. She called for a week straight trying to get that interview rescheduled. I told her that the position had been filled, her Weeners was "Was it because I'm black?"


Ah, so people show up in person to apply? I was thinking you received resumes via email and was wondering why you would bring them on-site when their stuff was all txty..


Most of the time I would find them on Monster or other resume websites and call them in for an interview.  Fun fact: Only about a quarter of the people called in for interviews actually show up.  


So I decided from that point forward, interview everyone who showed up, a quick five minute interview and saying "If we decide to hire you, we'll call you." is a better way of doing things than just kicking them out the door. Plus, that five minute interview was the fun one when I knew I wasn't going to be hiring that person: "So, what can you bring to this company that others can't?" "Why was your first job at 17 and not at 16?" "Pretend that I'm a deaf Eskimo, using only words, sell me on yellow snow. I know this isn't a sales position, but I need to know your customer service and ability to up sell."


That made sense for a little while and then it turned kind of weird.


I would do that so they wouldn't even consider reapplying.

One person I said "Okay, this position pays $19,760 a year salaried."  (that's $9.50/hour and the position wasn't salaried, no one worked over time in over three years).  The applicant shook his head.  "And do you have any problems working 60 hours a week salaried?"  The applicant said "No."  I said "Now, salaried means no over time, no extra money.  Your pay doesn't go up that week because you worked 60 hours instead of 40, and we're going to require at least 55 hours a week, but that $9.50 is only based on a 40 hour work week.  Is that okay?"  The applicant said "Yes."  I said "Now, to make this perfectly clear, if you take the job you can't complain that you are basically working 40 hours at $9.50 and 20 for free, because for those 20 hours on the 60 hour work weeks, you aren't getting any extra money.  We will expect you to work seven days a week.  That means you aren't getting paid for the weekends that we will expect you to work.  Are you fine with this?"  And he said "Yes."  I said, "I'm sorry, you're too dumb to work here if you think that's a fair deal."
 
2013-04-25 01:48:53 PM
There are plenty of intelligent, well spoken, hard working high school and college graduates out there looking for jobs and finding nothing. The people using text speak in resumes and job applications, showing up late to interviews and reeking of weed, and demanding $65k a year as an entry level employee do not represent the majority of Millennials. Most of us are grateful to even have a job.
  Currently, I tutor high school students. Before that I worked at Rita's Ice, and before that I worked as a canvasser for a charity. All so I could afford to attend grad school and to eat. I have been working since I was sixteen. And to be perfectly honest, I would be overjoyed to be making $25k a year. I want a full time job. I want to be a functioning member of society. Hell, if I was able to I'd be in the Air Force by now(I broke my knee cap in the last semester of my undergraduate education).
  Please, stop tearing down an entire generation to cover up the tightwad nature of companies who are hoarding money, overworking their current employees, and searching for 'unicorn' candidates that magically appear fully trained in what ever field is needed.
 
2013-04-25 01:50:35 PM

Great Janitor: I said, "I'm sorry, you're too dumb to work here if you think that's a fair deal."


Know how I know you haven't been laid off for an extended period of time with no job prospects in sight?
... Because that's how my gig goes. Thankfully, the salary's higher than that but it's just as ridiculous for my level of experience.
 
2013-04-25 01:52:10 PM

Endive Wombat: When I used to manage restaurants, we would hire almost anyone.  The thought process was this - If you are willing to learn, we can turn you into a fine/upscale dining waiter or waitress.  I really did not discriminate based off the clothes they wore, often because they would simply come in for an application and if I or another manager was free, we'd often asked them if we could interview them on the spot.  That being said...

If you came in and asked to fill out an application and also asked for a pen...yeah...no, we are not hiring you.  I learned this mentality from another manager that I worked with in the past.  His philosophy was that to get a job as a waiter, all you really need is to not look like you are strung out and on a week long binger,  wear somewhat appropriate clothing, and HAVE A FARKING PEN ON YOU TO FILL OUT THE DAMN APP!!!

So when someone came in for a job application and asked for a pen, we answered this way:

"Why do you not have a pen on you if you knew you were job hunting today?  Look, I will give you a pen, I have to let you fill out the application by law, but I can tell you this much, I will not be reviewing your app or calling you back to schedule an interview."

Often they would look confused and ask why, to which we would respond:

"You came in here with the express purpose of filling out a job application, aside from making yourself presentable, your only other requirement is to fill out the app...the fact that you lack the foresight to understand that you need a pen shows me that you are ill equipped to handle even the most mundane of tasks here."

99/100 times they would just leave.


Yeah, I would have left too, muttering "thank God I didn't wind up working for that asshole...".

/lighten up, francis
 
2013-04-25 01:53:05 PM

barefoot in the head: PanicMan: Clearly this is all the fault of the young people.  In no way are their parents, the schools, or the media in any way culpable.

Cut that shiat. I had a weird and frightening childhood which seriously compromised my abilty to use a good mind in a school setting. It didn't matter. I read everything because I wanted to know everything. Nothing stands in the way of a mind that wants to learn. Kids these days don't even have to walk to the library. Maybe that's the problem - perhaps knowledge seems cheap.


Good for you.  Honestly.  I had the same thing and did the same thing.  But you and I are the exceptions, not the norm on this issue. You assume kids have a library within safe walking distance.  Or know where the library is.  Or have free time to go read.
 
2013-04-25 02:00:31 PM

tortilla burger: Many employers are desperate to recruit, but say they are confronted by candidates who apply for jobs in 'text speak' and cannot even turn up punctually for an interview, according to the report from the Chartered Institute of Personnel and Development.

What they really meant was, "It happened maybe once or twice that someone used text speak on a resume". Writing the sentence in that way indicates that it's a common and widespread problem. Which it isn't. Thank you, anonymous Daily Fail Reporter.

Many young people do not read or understand the eligibility criteria for the jobs they apply for, employers said.

If they don't understand a job description, it's largely because the company itself isn't doing a proper job explaining it. Companies often have generic job descriptions to give themselves flexibility as to massage the job to match a qualified candidate. Every company I've worked for does this. Companies expect you to walk into the door and ask what exactly the job entails, because the job description tells you fark-all about what you'll be doing on a daily basis.

Many have a 'poor knowledge' of the company that they are applying to work for, and appear to have failed to research their potential future employer.Others are 'unable to answer why they want the job and what they want to do.'

For somebody with no experience in a particular industry, what exactly do you expect? There's no way a kid fresh out of school can tell you what they'll think of the job, or how their career will progress in a field they haven't even entered yet. And why does anyone want a job, really? Because I don't want to be a farking bum, that's why you nitwit.


That last sentence is so true.  I overhear interviewers ask "Why do you want to work at McDonald's?"  The only conceivable answer is "for the money."  Wanting to work a particular job comes with training and experience.
 
2013-04-25 02:00:43 PM

Kirzania: Great Janitor: I said, "I'm sorry, you're too dumb to work here if you think that's a fair deal."

Know how I know you haven't been laid off for an extended period of time with no job prospects in sight?
... Because that's how my gig goes. Thankfully, the salary's higher than that but it's just as ridiculous for my level of experience.


I've worked hourly, I've worked commission, I've worked hourly plus commission.  I've never worked salaried, and I never will.  My point of view is that if you're in a job and they are working you for 60 hours, you should be paid for all 60, with 20 at time and a half.  My last corporate level job the salaried people were paid their flat salaries and nothing more, but were expected to put in at least 50 hours.  I'm sorry, that's wrong.
 
2013-04-25 02:01:37 PM

SithLord: StickyBunBandit: How long before "Idiocracy" becomes reality?

We've already elected Obama, so there's that.


And if he has his way, this country will have 100% unemployment, so hiring will no longer be an issue!  YAY
 
2013-04-25 02:12:27 PM

Great Janitor: Englebert Slaptyback: Great Janitor

The first time that happened, I pointed to the application and resume, both in text speech, and I told her that I would reschedule, had a busy day full of meetings, apologized and asked her to leave. She called for a week straight trying to get that interview rescheduled. I told her that the position had been filled, her Weeners was "Was it because I'm black?"


Ah, so people show up in person to apply? I was thinking you received resumes via email and was wondering why you would bring them on-site when their stuff was all txty..

Most of the time I would find them on Monster or other resume websites and call them in for an interview.  Fun fact: Only about a quarter of the people called in for interviews actually show up.


So I decided from that point forward, interview everyone who showed up, a quick five minute interview and saying "If we decide to hire you, we'll call you." is a better way of doing things than just kicking them out the door. Plus, that five minute interview was the fun one when I knew I wasn't going to be hiring that person: "So, what can you bring to this company that others can't?" "Why was your first job at 17 and not at 16?" "Pretend that I'm a deaf Eskimo, using only words, sell me on yellow snow. I know this isn't a sales position, but I need to know your customer service and ability to up sell."


That made sense for a little while and then it turned kind of weird.

I would do that so they wouldn't even consider reapplying.

One person I said "Okay, this position pays $19,760 a year salaried."  (that's $9.50/hour and the position wasn't salaried, no one worked over time in over three years).  The applicant shook his head.  "And do you have any problems working 60 hours a week salaried?"  The applicant said "No."  I said "Now, salaried means no over time, no extra money.  Your pay doesn't go up that week because you worked 60 hours instead of 40, and we're going to require at least 55 hours a week, bu ...


That person may just be desperate, or stuffed with advice that says "Say yes to your ability to meet any unreasonable demand placed on you, even if you cannot."  Also, in my state's bad economy, it's not that uncommon for a salaried person to work so many hours that the pay works out to less than minimum wage -- and you know what happens if you complain to the Wages and Hours people.
 
2013-04-25 02:16:07 PM
FTA:
"Young people have 'unrealistic expectations' of the job market - with most saying they only want a job if it is in popular culture, media or sport, a damning report reveals today."

Later in same article:
"It cited research, from the charity the Education and Employers' Taskforce, which found one in five teenagers aged 15 and 16 want to work in culture, media and sports."

Apparently, most of these kids are ending up with careers in journalism.
 
2013-04-25 02:16:15 PM

Lemurknits: There are plenty of intelligent, well spoken, hard working high school and college graduates out there looking for jobs and finding nothing. The people using text speak in resumes and job applications, showing up late to interviews and reeking of weed, and demanding $65k a year as an entry level employee do not represent the majority of Millennials. Most of us are grateful to even have a job.
  Currently, I tutor high school students. Before that I worked at Rita's Ice, and before that I worked as a canvasser for a charity. All so I could afford to attend grad school and to eat. I have been working since I was sixteen. And to be perfectly honest, I would be overjoyed to be making $25k a year. I want a full time job. I want to be a functioning member of society. Hell, if I was able to I'd be in the Air Force by now(I broke my knee cap in the last semester of my undergraduate education).
  Please, stop tearing down an entire generation to cover up the tightwad nature of companies who are hoarding money, overworking their current employees, and searching for 'unicorn' candidates that magically appear fully trained in what ever field is needed.


I'll add to that:

Attention companies!!! - Jobs paying $30K-$35K with benefits that start 90-180 days after you've been there, that require 2-4 years experience and a bachelors degree is not "entry level"...that's called a shiatty job with piss poor pay.
 
2013-04-25 02:18:41 PM

PanicMan: barefoot in the head: PanicMan: Clearly this is all the fault of the young people.  In no way are their parents, the schools, or the media in any way culpable.

Cut that shiat. I had a weird and frightening childhood which seriously compromised my abilty to use a good mind in a school setting. It didn't matter. I read everything because I wanted to know everything. Nothing stands in the way of a mind that wants to learn. Kids these days don't even have to walk to the library. Maybe that's the problem - perhaps knowledge seems cheap.

Good for you.  Honestly.  I had the same thing and did the same thing.  But you and I are the exceptions, not the norm on this issue. You assume kids have a library within safe walking distance.  Or know where the library is.  Or have free time to go read.


Glad you overcame it to whatever extent it can be overcome. My point was that the internet makes the walk to the library irrelevant in terms of access to knowlegde, but might cheapen the overall value of information, due to the very ease of access. if u cn txt, u cn search - but you must care enough to learn.
 
2013-04-25 02:21:38 PM

Endive Wombat: Lemurknits: There are plenty of intelligent, well spoken, hard working high school and college graduates out there looking for jobs and finding nothing. The people using text speak in resumes and job applications, showing up late to interviews and reeking of weed, and demanding $65k a year as an entry level employee do not represent the majority of Millennials. Most of us are grateful to even have a job.
  Currently, I tutor high school students. Before that I worked at Rita's Ice, and before that I worked as a canvasser for a charity. All so I could afford to attend grad school and to eat. I have been working since I was sixteen. And to be perfectly honest, I would be overjoyed to be making $25k a year. I want a full time job. I want to be a functioning member of society. Hell, if I was able to I'd be in the Air Force by now(I broke my knee cap in the last semester of my undergraduate education).
  Please, stop tearing down an entire generation to cover up the tightwad nature of companies who are hoarding money, overworking their current employees, and searching for 'unicorn' candidates that magically appear fully trained in what ever field is needed.

I'll add to that:

Attention companies!!! - Jobs paying $30K-$35K with benefits that start 90-180 days after you've been there, that require 2-4 years experience and a bachelors degree is not "entry level"...that's called a shiatty job with piss poor pay.


And don't forget the utterly bizarre rules some enforce. For instance, I applied to work for a non-profit that works to end greyhound racing. I didn't know until the interview that the entire office was vegan. All lunches brought in had to be vegan. The ever living hell?
 
2013-04-25 02:23:37 PM

Endive Wombat: "You came in here with the express purpose of filling out a job application, aside from making yourself presentable, your only other requirement is to fill out the app...the fact that you lack the foresight to understand that you need a pen shows me that you are ill equipped to handle even the most mundane of tasks here."


I'm not applying for Monday tasks. I was ummm....applying for the Thurs-Sun waiter position, ...'kay?.
 
2013-04-25 02:43:48 PM

AGremlin: What the applicants might look like:

[i.telegraph.co.uk image 460x288]

What happened to you Great Britain?


Socialized Medicine, you have been warned America.
 
2013-04-25 02:46:03 PM

Great Janitor: Englebert Slaptyback: Great Janitor

The first time that happened, I pointed to the application and resume, both in text speech, and I told her that I would reschedule, had a busy day full of meetings, apologized and asked her to leave. She called for a week straight trying to get that interview rescheduled. I told her that the position had been filled, her Weeners was "Was it because I'm black?"


Ah, so people show up in person to apply? I was thinking you received resumes via email and was wondering why you would bring them on-site when their stuff was all txty..

Most of the time I would find them on Monster or other resume websites and call them in for an interview.  Fun fact: Only about a quarter of the people called in for interviews actually show up.  


So I decided from that point forward, interview everyone who showed up, a quick five minute interview and saying "If we decide to hire you, we'll call you." is a better way of doing things than just kicking them out the door. Plus, that five minute interview was the fun one when I knew I wasn't going to be hiring that person: "So, what can you bring to this company that others can't?" "Why was your first job at 17 and not at 16?" "Pretend that I'm a deaf Eskimo, using only words, sell me on yellow snow. I know this isn't a sales position, but I need to know your customer service and ability to up sell."


That made sense for a little while and then it turned kind of weird.

I would do that so they wouldn't even consider reapplying.

One person I said "Okay, this position pays $19,760 a year salaried."  (that's $9.50/hour and the position wasn't salaried, no one worked over time in over three years).  The applicant shook his head.  "And do you have any problems working 60 hours a week salaried?"  The applicant said "No."  I said "Now, salaried means no over time, no extra money.  Your pay doesn't go up that week because you worked 60 hours instead of 40, and we're going to require at least 55 hours a week, but that $9.50 is only based on a 40 hour work week.  Is that okay?"  The applicant said "Yes."  I said "Now, to make this perfectly clear, if you take the job you can't complain that you are basically working 40 hours at $9.50 and 20 for free, because for those 20 hours on the 60 hour work weeks, you aren't getting any extra money.  We will expect you to work seven days a week.  That means you aren't getting paid for the weekends that we will expect you to work.  Are you fine with this?"  And he said "Yes."  I said, "I'm sorry, you're too dumb to work here if you think that's a fair deal."


Wow you're an ass. Maybe this guy was desperate. I was unemployed for half of last year and I would have taken anything with any kind of paycheck to feed my family and pay my mortgage. I did get a lousy part time job that I was happy to get and was able to pay for food, unfortunately not the mortgage.

Think before you make assumptions and try to make an ass out of somebody, you don't know their situation.
 
2013-04-25 02:51:56 PM

Lemurknits: And don't forget the utterly bizarre rules some enforce. For instance, I applied to work for a non-profit that works to end greyhound racing. I didn't know until the interview that the entire office was vegan. All lunches brought in had to be vegan. The ever living hell?


...Do they know what dogs eat?
 
2013-04-25 03:01:13 PM
I call shenanigans on that sample text message. This article was written from a British point of view, right? Well, why would they write "eZ" in a text message when they would pronounce that "ee zed" and not "easy"?

BUSTED!

/Oh yeah, I'm on fire!
 
2013-04-25 03:07:51 PM

YixilTesiphon: Lemurknits: And don't forget the utterly bizarre rules some enforce. For instance, I applied to work for a non-profit that works to end greyhound racing. I didn't know until the interview that the entire office was vegan. All lunches brought in had to be vegan. The ever living hell?

...Do they know what dogs eat?


They should- they have an office greyhound. Poor thing didn't even lift its head off the pillow so it must have been one of those sad dogs that are forced to be vegan by their humans.

/grew up with dogs
//now own a cat
///ALL get real meat
 
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