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(Huffington Post)   Most people who cheat on their spouses go to dinner with their lover at Chili's, because that's the last place anyone would look   (huffingtonpost.com) divider line 67
    More: Strange, chili con carne, paid survey, self-portraits, dinner, toddlers  
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7068 clicks; posted to Main » on 25 Apr 2013 at 5:44 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-04-24 09:41:23 PM
cuz the biatch raped his wallet so he can't afford anything better
 
2013-04-24 09:58:10 PM
Last place anyone that was planning on having sex would eat, too
 
2013-04-24 10:03:17 PM
So I should go to Chili's and play "spot the cheaters"?
 
2013-04-24 10:05:27 PM
A crappy article that ends with a slideshow that you have to click through to obtain the key information that's deliberately left out of the article.

Wonderful.
 
2013-04-24 10:13:24 PM

ms_lara_croft: So I should go to Chili's and play "spot the cheaters"?


OOh, when I was having an affair it was weird, like seeing the world through Frodo's eyes in the shadow world, other couples that were obviously cheating. I don't know that I could still tell, but back then it was easy to see the cues that a couple wasn't actually together.
 
2013-04-24 10:19:38 PM
A lot of them go to gay bars. All the regulars could tell;  a guy and a girl keep showing up at the same time afterwork and have a few drinks, then start making out and have a quicky in the restroom.
 
2013-04-24 10:22:26 PM
I would order the taco thruster as an appetizer for my lover.

/not into that cheating thing
 
2013-04-24 10:29:44 PM

Fano: ms_lara_croft: So I should go to Chili's and play "spot the cheaters"?

OOh, when I was having an affair it was weird, like seeing the world through Frodo's eyes in the shadow world, other couples that were obviously cheating. I don't know that I could still tell, but back then it was easy to see the cues that a couple wasn't actually together.


What were the cues? I'm curious... Stuff like hunkering down in the booth or choosing seating in the back?
 
2013-04-24 10:33:13 PM

optikeye: A lot of them go to gay bars. All the regulars could tell;  a guy and a girl keep showing up at the same time afterwork and have a few drinks, then start making out and have a quicky in the restroom.


/csb   I was pulled by the ear out of the womens restroom in a lesbian bar once for getting it on with my
girlfriend, she took me in there, how could I say no
 
2013-04-24 10:36:56 PM
I have to give Subby credit: a headline laced with sufficient snark and yet 100% accurate.
 
2013-04-24 10:40:32 PM

doofusss: optikeye: A lot of them go to gay bars. All the regulars could tell;  a guy and a girl keep showing up at the same time afterwork and have a few drinks, then start making out and have a quicky in the restroom.

/csb   I was pulled by the ear out of the womens restroom in a lesbian bar once for getting it on with my
girlfriend, she took me in there, how could I say no


Seems to me you'd have had more privacy in the mens room

/I could be wrong
 
2013-04-24 10:50:52 PM

factoryconnection: I have to give Subby credit: a headline laced with sufficient snark and yet 100% accurate.


Quite the rarity on Fark, I assure you
 
2013-04-24 11:16:53 PM

Pocket Ninja: A crappy article that ends with a slideshow that you have to click through to obtain the key information that's deliberately left out of the article.

Wonderful.


The article is a metaphor for the type of woman you might meet on a website where the woman tells you a bunch of things (she is ok with you knowing) in her profile, but then makes you go out on date after date to get the real story
 
2013-04-24 11:40:58 PM
Plus they have the two for $20 dinner deals. Woman aren't going to notice or think twice about $20 on a credit card bill.
 
2013-04-24 11:45:12 PM
*glances at last month's expense report*

Goddammit. I think I hit six out of ten. Usually make some sales droid pick up the tab at least.
 
2013-04-25 12:22:41 AM

ms_lara_croft: What were the cues? I'm curious... Stuff like hunkering down in the booth or choosing seating in the back?


My wife and kid and I recently went out for lunch at local chain that's a between Chili's and a nice steakhouse in the class scale. The only other customers there were a middle-aged couple that pretty obviously were married to other people. They were making out like 17 year olds through the whole meal and giggling and raising hell. Basically the exact opposite of what you mentioned.

My theory is they were from LA and drove up to the burbs and were overcompensating since they didn't think they needed to sneak around.
 
2013-04-25 12:27:44 AM
I once got busy in a Burger King bathroom.
 
2013-04-25 01:09:19 AM

Richard Freckle: I once got busy in a Burger King bathroom.


Having it your way, eh?
 
2013-04-25 01:32:53 AM
Nothing says mistress sex quite like a hot stream of 5-alarm super-jack-daniels-chicken-fajita-shooters coming out of your ass at mach three into the sheets at the days inn.
 
2013-04-25 01:35:52 AM

Richard Freckle: I once got busy in a Burger King bathroom.


I once got married in an outhouse at Mardi Gras in New Orleans.  It's all relative.
 
2013-04-25 02:00:56 AM

ms_lara_croft: Fano: ms_lara_croft: So I should go to Chili's and play "spot the cheaters"?

OOh, when I was having an affair it was weird, like seeing the world through Frodo's eyes in the shadow world, other couples that were obviously cheating. I don't know that I could still tell, but back then it was easy to see the cues that a couple wasn't actually together.

What were the cues? I'm curious... Stuff like hunkering down in the booth or choosing seating in the back?


None of those things. I can say as someone that was ":the other man" for 5 years there was never any of that. I know that when I was still in school during that time I teased someone about an affair (that I didn't suspect) and made a joke about and got rammed against a wall for.
 .
 
2013-04-25 02:48:12 AM

Pocket Ninja: A crappy article that ends with a slideshow that you have to click through to obtain the key information that's deliberately left out of the article.

Wonderful.


That's why I can't stand Huff Po. Not only that but sometimes unrelated content autoplays and they cram so much other sh*t on one page it just makes their whole layout intolerable.
 
2013-04-25 03:01:59 AM

Richard Freckle: I once got busy in a Burger King bathroom.


*hides my crackers and my licorice*
 
2013-04-25 05:36:39 AM

Fano: None of those things. I can say as someone that was ":the other man" for 5 years there was never any of that. I know that when I was still in school during that time I teased someone about an affair (that I didn't suspect) and made a joke about and got rammed against a wall for.


That usually involves a two Chili's date minimum.
 
2013-04-25 05:56:53 AM

miss diminutive: Fano: None of those things. I can say as someone that was ":the other man" for 5 years there was never any of that. I know that when I was still in school during that time I teased someone about an affair (that I didn't suspect) and made a joke about and got rammed against a wall for.

That usually involves a two Chili's date minimum.


Well, at least make 'em buy ya a few drinks first but no reason to go to Chili's :/

; D
 
2013-04-25 06:03:16 AM

factoryconnection: I have to give Subby credit: a headline laced with sufficient snark and yet 100% accurate.


Disagree. I doubt that over 50% of all cheaters in the world have dinner with their lovers at Chili's. I might accept the plurality, but the majority? It doesn't add up
 
2013-04-25 06:03:25 AM
doofusss:
/csb   I was pulled by the ear out of the womens restroom in a lesbian bar once for getting it on with my
girlfriend, she took me in there, how could I say no


Damn. Why would a guy go to a lesbian bar, even if it was the girlfriend's idea?
I can't imagine a more hostile area for a man outside of war zones.
 
2013-04-25 06:05:00 AM
Yuck, well that makes cheating even less appealing.
 
2013-04-25 06:10:46 AM
Lol this is a trip. Only been to chile's once in my life and it was while I was in a situation as one the article is about, she picked to meet there.
 
2013-04-25 06:14:37 AM

God-is-a-Taco: Damn. Why would a guy go to a lesbian bar, even if it was the girlfriend's idea?
I can't imagine a more hostile area for a man outside of war zones.


I used to go to them all the time with my sister (she's gay), got laid at a WAY higher percentage than a normal bar.
 
2013-04-25 06:24:43 AM
But, I like Chili's...
 
2013-04-25 06:26:36 AM
This article was posted on Puffhost, because it's the last place anyone would look.
 
2013-04-25 06:29:10 AM
And here I expected cheaters to be so much classier.
 
2013-04-25 06:33:09 AM
So, if I plan on taking a cheaty woman out for a meal it's best we go somewhere that serves food, good to know.
 
2013-04-25 06:37:07 AM
Did anybody see Anthony Bourdain go to a Sizzler last week?
 
2013-04-25 07:07:58 AM
How long do they put up with Chili's terrible cuisine before they want their baby back?
 
2013-04-25 07:14:24 AM

Pocket Ninja: A crappy article that ends with a slideshow that you have to click through to obtain the key information that's deliberately left out of the article.


I'll just save everyone the trouble:

*SPOILER*

Eating at Chili's gives you mondo gas.
 
2013-04-25 07:18:32 AM

God-is-a-Taco: doofusss:
/csb   I was pulled by the ear out of the womens restroom in a lesbian bar once for getting it on with my
girlfriend, she took me in there, how could I say no

Damn. Why would a guy go to a lesbian bar, even if it was the girlfriend's idea?
I can't imagine a more hostile area for a man outside of war zones.


Not all lesbians are butch man-haters like the stereotypes in your head. Many of them are down-to-earth, fun people who just don't happen to be attracted to men.
 
2013-04-25 07:23:31 AM

God-is-a-Taco: doofusss:
/csb   I was pulled by the ear out of the womens restroom in a lesbian bar once for getting it on with my
girlfriend, she took me in there, how could I say no

Damn. Why would a guy go to a lesbian bar, even if it was the girlfriend's idea?
I can't imagine a more hostile area for a man outside of war zones.


This is a excerpt from my new book:  Dispatches From the Square Community.
 
2013-04-25 07:36:34 AM

T-Bone42: God-is-a-Taco: doofusss:
/csb   I was pulled by the ear out of the womens restroom in a lesbian bar once for getting it on with my
girlfriend, she took me in there, how could I say no

Damn. Why would a guy go to a lesbian bar, even if it was the girlfriend's idea?
I can't imagine a more hostile area for a man outside of war zones.

Not all lesbians are butch man-haters like the stereotypes in your head. Many of them are down-to-earth, fun people who just don't happen to be attracted to men.


yep, the local "Lesbian Bar" here in town is a great, comfortable place filled lots of decent folks.

i also made the discovery that big black lesbians and little mohawk lesbians love them some Cerebral kneival.
 
2013-04-25 07:38:19 AM

MaudlinMutantMollusk: doofusss: optikeye: A lot of them go to gay bars. All the regulars could tell;  a guy and a girl keep showing up at the same time afterwork and have a few drinks, then start making out and have a quicky in the restroom.

/csb   I was pulled by the ear out of the womens restroom in a lesbian bar once for getting it on with my
girlfriend, she took me in there, how could I say no

Seems to me you'd have had more privacy in the mens room

/I could be wrong


The lesbian bars I've been in didn't really respect the concept of a "Men's Room".
 
2013-04-25 07:39:59 AM

T-Bone42: Not all lesbians are butch man-haters like the stereotypes in your head. Many of them are down-to-earth, fun people who just don't happen to be attracted to men.


That stereotype exists only because the butch maneater is the only type we notice as being gay. The rest don't advertise so they go unnoticed, bolstering the idea that being a lesbian necessarily means someone who rips penises off as a hobby.

Same goes for men. The queen stereotype is reinforced because Frank over there, an everyday masculine guy, doesn't go to a restaurant and say, "I'll have the chicken parm and by the way, I love the cock." It's no one's business what he does so people tend to forget he exists in huge numbers, assuming that all homosexuals loudly shriek with a lisp at the local Banana Republic.
 
2013-04-25 07:42:21 AM

Cerebral Knievel: i also made the discovery that big black lesbians and little mohawk lesbians love them some Cerebral kneival.


For some reason I cannot stop laughing at this sentence. Possibly because I'm residually drunk from yesterday.
 
2013-04-25 07:44:06 AM

God-is-a-Taco: doofusss:
/csb   I was pulled by the ear out of the womens restroom in a lesbian bar once for getting it on with my
girlfriend, she took me in there, how could I say no

Damn. Why would a guy go to a lesbian bar, even if it was the girlfriend's idea?
I can't imagine a more hostile area for a man outside of war zones.


Spoiler alert: lesbians by and large don't hate men. They probably just hate you.
 
2013-04-25 07:46:35 AM
That article was more about how rich people cheat. Big deal, I like the Jerry Springer stories better
 
2013-04-25 08:03:27 AM
It sounds like they way that they did their survey would tend to get answers which seem to favor chain restaurants -- because they were looking for the most popular restaurants over several cities to take a date to. So, probably only restaurants that have locations in multiple cities would reach the top of the list.

It could be that the most popular place in San Francisco is Fleur de Lys and in Boston it's Mamma Maria, but if you want "the most popular restaurant" over multiple cities it is bound to be a chain.
 
2013-04-25 08:03:28 AM
For safety's sake, I always suggested the McDonalds Drive-Thru, and eating it parked back by the dumpster in the back. Smooooooth.
 
2013-04-25 08:03:56 AM
Submitter obviously has never had a chicken fajita roll-up with extra Mexiranch on the side for dipping.
 
2013-04-25 08:05:43 AM
BTW, since Morton's Steakhouse was mentioned, let me just say that they suck. I was a bartender there years ago and it's a total ripoff. Dropping $200 on dinner for two is great when it's imaginative and prepared by a local chef, but Morton's is a slab of meat with an ala carte side starch and veg and a pedestrian glass of wine. I can get that sh*t at 50 other restaurants in my city alone, for less. All you're paying for is the abundance of mahogany, which is certainly cool in its own way - but it's more suited for a business dinner than taking your mistress out. It reeks of penis-posturing in there. They even play the same 20 Frank Sinatra songs on a loop, or at least my local one did. When trying that hard to be masculine, it comes off as silly.

/I did make about 60k for each of the two years I worked there, which wasn't bad for some kid with a philosophy degree.
 
2013-04-25 08:08:19 AM

dickfreckle: T-Bone42: Not all lesbians are butch man-haters like the stereotypes in your head. Many of them are down-to-earth, fun people who just don't happen to be attracted to men.

That stereotype exists only because the butch maneater is the only type we notice as being gay. The rest don't advertise so they go unnoticed, bolstering the idea that being a lesbian necessarily means someone who rips penises off as a hobby.

Same goes for men. The queen stereotype is reinforced because Frank over there, an everyday masculine guy, doesn't go to a restaurant and say, "I'll have the chicken parm and by the way, I love the cock." It's no one's business what he does so people tend to forget he exists in huge numbers, assuming that all homosexuals loudly shriek with a lisp at the local Banana Republic.


QFT
 
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