If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Newser)   Second child dies after parents pick prayer over medicine. Guess how the first one died? Go on, guess   (newser.com) divider line 354
    More: Sad, appeal  
•       •       •

15945 clicks; posted to Main » on 23 Apr 2013 at 8:48 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



354 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | » | Last | Show all
 
2013-04-23 11:04:37 PM

sithon: And these are the people breeding in great numbers .


Yeah, well they'd better pop them out as fast as they can since they keep killing them. And before the wife dies an entirely preventable death due to complications in (constant) pregnancy or childbirth.
 
2013-04-23 11:06:26 PM

GleefulFiend: Csb

When I was 10 my parents went to some kind of retreat and left me in the care of my religious fundamentalist uncle and his family in rural Oregon. One day I was playing hide and seek in the barn with my cousins when I fell out of the hayloft and split my knee open on a combine blade. My uncle, who did not believe in doctors or medicine (hell, he barely believed in soap) put a butterfly bandage on it and told me not to bend my knee for the rest of the week until my parents got back.

I needed stitches I never got, but I escaped the situation with a stiff knee and a gnarly scar (thankfully, I had been immunized against tetanus). I was a lot luckier than his youngest son, who self-medicated for depression with a chair and a noose. I was a lot luckier than the diabetic kid who died in the nurse's office at the school where my mom worked because the kid's family used prayer instead of insulin. That was 30 years ago.

/csb

Point is, this problem is not new and we as a society seem to be really bad at solving it. I hope they are convicted of murder this time.


How were you supposed to properly pray to the Almighty without bending your knee? Your uncle was a lukewarm Christian at best.
 
2013-04-23 11:09:04 PM

theknuckler_33: skullkrusher: theknuckler_33:I guess the fact that "This parable is told a lot in Catholic churches "  being pure bullshiat struck me the wrong way. I guess that's just me.

I heard it years ago. Maybe in church, I dunno. I can't say that I've gone to a lot of Catholic Churches so I can't really say it is bullshiat or not.

I have a lot of respect for you and this post from you blows my mind. Did you really read that 'joke'?  Are you really trying to tell me that you think it is possible that that might be an actual teaching of the Catholic, or any other, church? A parable that basically teaches that God says "you are a moran"? Did you read it?


He forgot the last part where God says"bazinga!"
 
2013-04-23 11:11:21 PM
It had been raining for days and days, and a terrible flood had come over the land. The waters rose so high that one man was forced to climb onto the roof of his house.

As the waters rose higher and higher, a man in a rowboat appeared, and told him to get in. "No," replied the man on the roof. "I have faith in the Lord; the Lord will save me." So the man in the rowboat went away. The man on the roof prayed for God to save him.

The waters rose higher and higher, and suddenly a speedboat appeared. "Climb in!" shouted a man in the boat. "No," replied the man on the roof. "I have faith in the Lord; the Lord will save me." So the man in the speedboat went away. The man on the roof prayed for God to save him.


The waters continued to rise. A helicopter appeared and over the loudspeaker, the pilot announced he would lower a rope to the man on the roof. "No," replied the man on the roof. "I have faith in the Lord; the Lord will save me." So the helicopter went away. The man on the roof prayed for God to save him.

The waters rose higher and higher, and eventually they rose so high that the man on the roof was washed away, and alas, the poor man drowned.

Upon arriving in heaven, the man marched straight over to God. "Heavenly Father," he said, "I had faith in you, I prayed to you to save me, and yet you did nothing. Why?" God gave him a puzzled look, and replied "I sent you two boats and a helicopter, what more did you expect?"
 
2013-04-23 11:12:42 PM
Darwin, his face gray and his eyes bright.
 
2013-04-23 11:13:30 PM

skullkrusher: theknuckler_33: skullkrusher: theknuckler_33:I guess the fact that "This parable is told a lot in Catholic churches "  being pure bullshiat struck me the wrong way. I guess that's just me.

I heard it years ago. Maybe in church, I dunno. I can't say that I've gone to a lot of Catholic Churches so I can't really say it is bullshiat or not.

I have a lot of respect for you and this post from you blows my mind. Did you really read that 'joke'?  Are you really trying to tell me that you think it is possible that that might be an actual teaching of the Catholic, or any other, church? A parable that basically teaches that God says "you are a moran"? Did you read it?

yeah, I think it is rather unsurprising that a mainstream church would teach its members that people of faith should pray AND take action rather than just doing what these asshole parents do. Are you surprised to see a priest in a doctor's office or going to the dentist?


Dude, I have you farkied for being pedantic and now you are equating the kookie fringe church the folks from TFA belong to with 'mainstream churches'?  Dude, stick to the subject. The 'parable' from plavacek  who then said it is told in a lot of Catholic churches. You get it now?  That is the point here. THAT claim is farking bullshiat. The kooks from TFA are not from a 'mainstream church'. This isn't about the people from TFA, this isn't abou their church. This is about the farking retarded joke from plavacek being categorized as something that is preached regularly at Catholic masses which is pure farking bullshiat.
 
2013-04-23 11:18:15 PM

theknuckler_33: skullkrusher: theknuckler_33: skullkrusher: theknuckler_33: skullkrusher: came for this

Do me a solid and fill me in?

What? I came to post that joke, saw that someone else already did it, didn't bother

Just curious, but didn't the 'joke' end with "what more did you want?" from the OP?

It was the bit after that that threw me off.

He ended with "This parable is told a lot in Catholic churches - I've heard it dozens of times. It's a shame these wackjobs hadn't. If God is good and God is everywhere, then God is in the doctors and the hospitals and the four bucks worth of generic antibiotics that would have saved your son's life, you monsters."

I prolly would've just posted the story because I think it's a cute little story but I agreed with the rest too.

Then someone shook a tiny fist and I kinda jumped on the end of that in tiny fist shaking agreement

I guess the fact that "This parable is told a lot in Catholic churches "  being pure bullshiat struck me the wrong way. I guess that's just me.


I grew up Catholic and I've heard it too. When I was a kid, I remember the Catholic church used to focus on social justice, helping the poor and all that good stuff at least in public. But as I grew older, more molestation cases started to come out and they started preaching more about how the gays and non-believers were sinful, so my siblings and I all bailed.
 
2013-04-23 11:18:46 PM

phrawgh: GleefulFiend: Csb

When I was 10 my parents went to some kind of retreat and left me in the care of my religious fundamentalist uncle and his family in rural Oregon. One day I was playing hide and seek in the barn with my cousins when I fell out of the hayloft and split my knee open on a combine blade. My uncle, who did not believe in doctors or medicine (hell, he barely believed in soap) put a butterfly bandage on it and told me not to bend my knee for the rest of the week until my parents got back.

I needed stitches I never got, but I escaped the situation with a stiff knee and a gnarly scar (thankfully, I had been immunized against tetanus). I was a lot luckier than his youngest son, who self-medicated for depression with a chair and a noose. I was a lot luckier than the diabetic kid who died in the nurse's office at the school where my mom worked because the kid's family used prayer instead of insulin. That was 30 years ago.

/csb

Point is, this problem is not new and we as a society seem to be really bad at solving it. I hope they are convicted of murder this time.

How were you supposed to properly pray to the Almighty without bending your knee? Your uncle was a lukewarm Christian at best.


They were sure I was going to hell anyway. The first day I was there I refused to pray at dinner and my Aunt gave me a twenty minute lecture about keeping my corruption away from her children.

They're Jehovah's Witnesses, so he isn't much of a Christian at all. (Not all JW's eschew medical science, before somebody jumps on me about that.)
 
2013-04-23 11:19:47 PM

rmatthewware: Every group of people that becomes large enough will have their nuts.  Most Christians aren't like this.  Most of us wouldn't let a child suffer.  If you want to condemn these people, I'll be right there with you.  But don't blame Christianity because some of his followers are idiots.


True Scotsman like typing detected.
 
2013-04-23 11:20:34 PM

theknuckler_33: skullkrusher: theknuckler_33: skullkrusher: theknuckler_33:I guess the fact that "This parable is told a lot in Catholic churches "  being pure bullshiat struck me the wrong way. I guess that's just me.

I heard it years ago. Maybe in church, I dunno. I can't say that I've gone to a lot of Catholic Churches so I can't really say it is bullshiat or not.

I have a lot of respect for you and this post from you blows my mind. Did you really read that 'joke'?  Are you really trying to tell me that you think it is possible that that might be an actual teaching of the Catholic, or any other, church? A parable that basically teaches that God says "you are a moran"? Did you read it?

yeah, I think it is rather unsurprising that a mainstream church would teach its members that people of faith should pray AND take action rather than just doing what these asshole parents do. Are you surprised to see a priest in a doctor's office or going to the dentist?

Dude, I have you farkied for being pedantic and now you are equating the kookie fringe church the folks from TFA belong to with 'mainstream churches'?  Dude, stick to the subject. The 'parable' from plavacek  who then said it is told in a lot of Catholic churches. You get it now?  That is the point here. THAT claim is farking bullshiat. The kooks from TFA are not from a 'mainstream church'. This isn't about the people from TFA, this isn't abou their church. This is about the farking retarded joke from plavacek being categorized as something that is preached regularly at Catholic masses which is pure farking bullshiat.


dammit, I realize I misread your post. Sorry SK.
 
2013-04-23 11:21:08 PM

rmatthewware: Every group of people that becomes large enough will have their nuts.  Most Christians aren't like this.  Most of us wouldn't let a child suffer.  If you want to condemn these people, I'll be right there with you.  But don't blame Christianity because some of his followers are idiots.



Yes, Yes you *DO* blame organized fairytale tellers. I distinctly remember our parish priest and all sunday school teachers claiming that they had examples of people being healed by prayer or a house not burning down (or ripped up by a tornado as the case may be) because it had been blessed. Obviously, all silly nonsense. At least they were careful never to say that we should Not go to a hospital or doctor when we were sick.
 
2013-04-23 11:23:52 PM

theknuckler_33: Dude, I have you farkied for being pedantic and now you are equating the kookie fringe church the folks from TFA belong to with 'mainstream churches'?


huh? No I'm not.

theknuckler_33: Dude, stick to the subject. The 'parable' from plavacek who then said it is told in a lot of Catholic churches. You get it now? That is the point here. THAT claim is farking bullshiat. The kooks from TFA are not from a 'mainstream church'. This isn't about the people from TFA, this isn't abou their church. This is about the farking retarded joke from plavacek being categorized as something that is preached regularly at Catholic masses which is pure farking bullshiat.


I can't tell if you're joking. You're all over the place.
As I said, I can't say that it is taught in many churches but I am familiar with it, I might've heard it in church. It isn't a story I'd be shocked to hear in church. I never said the assholes from TFA are from a mainstream church. I am referring to your incredulity that a Catholic church would preach such a story from the pulpit. I don't find it all that surprising.
You are waaaaaaaaaaaaaay too farking angry about this little story that's just meant to tell people to not just hope for a supernatural miracle from prayer but rather recognize the plain ways God helps you and answers your pleas for help.
 
2013-04-23 11:24:21 PM

HindiDiscoMonster: ciberido: poonesfarm: Mauled by a saber-toothed tiger?

Attacked by an assailant wielding loganberries?

[www.quitecurious.com image 400x300]


Fresh fruit can be more dangerous than a pointed stick.
 
2013-04-23 11:24:48 PM

skullkrusher: theknuckler_33: skullkrusher: theknuckler_33:I guess the fact that "This parable is told a lot in Catholic churches "  being pure bullshiat struck me the wrong way. I guess that's just me.

I heard it years ago. Maybe in church, I dunno. I can't say that I've gone to a lot of Catholic Churches so I can't really say it is bullshiat or not.

I have a lot of respect for you and this post from you blows my mind. Did you really read that 'joke'?  Are you really trying to tell me that you think it is possible that that might be an actual teaching of the Catholic, or any other, church? A parable that basically teaches that God says "you are a moran"? Did you read it?

yeah, I think it is rather unsurprising that a mainstream church would teach its members that people of faith should pray AND take action rather than just doing what these asshole parents do. Are you surprised to see a priest in a doctor's office or going to the dentist?


After reading your comment correctly (I misread it at first), I'm not really sure the point yo are trying to make. I am simply arguing against the idea that the joke 'parable' that we are talking about is some kind of regular teaching... basically anywhere. It is a joke. No church teaches it. Do you agree?
 
2013-04-23 11:24:54 PM

theknuckler_33: theknuckler_33: skullkrusher: theknuckler_33: skullkrusher: theknuckler_33:I guess the fact that "This parable is told a lot in Catholic churches "  being pure bullshiat struck me the wrong way. I guess that's just me.

I heard it years ago. Maybe in church, I dunno. I can't say that I've gone to a lot of Catholic Churches so I can't really say it is bullshiat or not.

I have a lot of respect for you and this post from you blows my mind. Did you really read that 'joke'?  Are you really trying to tell me that you think it is possible that that might be an actual teaching of the Catholic, or any other, church? A parable that basically teaches that God says "you are a moran"? Did you read it?

yeah, I think it is rather unsurprising that a mainstream church would teach its members that people of faith should pray AND take action rather than just doing what these asshole parents do. Are you surprised to see a priest in a doctor's office or going to the dentist?

Dude, I have you farkied for being pedantic and now you are equating the kookie fringe church the folks from TFA belong to with 'mainstream churches'?  Dude, stick to the subject. The 'parable' from plavacek  who then said it is told in a lot of Catholic churches. You get it now?  That is the point here. THAT claim is farking bullshiat. The kooks from TFA are not from a 'mainstream church'. This isn't about the people from TFA, this isn't abou their church. This is about the farking retarded joke from plavacek being categorized as something that is preached regularly at Catholic masses which is pure farking bullshiat.

dammit, I realize I misread your post. Sorry SK.


saw this after my post. No problems. Was gonna tell you to look out for the dude with the taser and straight jacket that God sent your way ;)
 
2013-04-23 11:25:48 PM

tuna fingers: HindiDiscoMonster: Abox: HindiDiscoMonster: Abox: FTA they could face a prison sentence as long as 10 years.

And like Job, retaining faith despite continued misery by God's hand.

I think you spelled Satan wrong...

/Fark, I am disappoint - I thought you knew your bibles... so you could bash it more effectively.


This wasn't meant to bash, just to predict their reaction to being convicted.  They will think the deaths of their kids and their prison sentence is all part of God's glorious plan. But thanks for the correction.

oh I know, I was just being snarky... :)

/snarky is a word right?

Oh wow, catch up on the FAQ.  You used a word that will get you banninated.
Have a nice break.


First the "personal choice" comment, then the random fees comments and now just pulling rules out of your ass?  You're the first person I've farkied as a troll based on just one thread.  Congrats!
 
2013-04-23 11:25:56 PM

over_and_done: johnnieconnie: They were convicted of involuntary manslaughter the first time.

/hope they get Murder One with life for this one

From TFA:

"They have not been charged, as authorities are waiting on autopsy results, but they could face a prison sentence as long as 10 years."

10 years is bullshiat.  They killed two children and would likely kill the remaining seven if given the chance.  The correct response would be to infect them both with something horrible, then isolate them so that they can't spread it.  Wait a week or so for them to die.


Dislike killing? Then you'll love murder! Murder your problems away, over_and_done-style!

/excited commercial voice
 
2013-04-23 11:26:27 PM

boozehat: Bonobo62: Idiots. Laughter is the best medicine. Not prayer. Laughter. Prayer is only the third-best medicine.

i'll bite....

what's the second?

or is this like #2 with the underpants nomes?


Number two is actual medicine. Though third is actually placibo, prayer is fourth unless you group them together.

Studies have show prayer to be detrimental, worse than placebos.
 
2013-04-23 11:26:28 PM

Mega Steve: If there IS a Heaven, what happens to all the babies (and fetuses) that end up there? Do they age? It would suck to be baby for eternity



Imagine...... neverending breastfeeding........and lotsa naps.......
 
2013-04-23 11:27:41 PM

theknuckler_33: After reading your comment correctly (I misread it at first), I'm not really sure the point yo are trying to make. I am simply arguing against the idea that the joke 'parable' that we are talking about is some kind of regular teaching... basically anywhere. It is a joke. No church teaches it. Do you agree?


no, as I said I heard it years ago and I don't know who would've told me. Maybe it was in church, maybe the priest who lead our youth group get-togethers on Thursday nights during the summer, maybe my uncle who was 1/2 a bottle deep in some Jameson at Christmas... I don't remember. I don't find it out of line with anything I know that I've learned in 16 years of Catholic education though so if I suddenly remembered tomorrow that I did hear it during a homily, I wouldn't be the least bit surprised.
 
2013-04-23 11:28:05 PM

Ned Stark: Was it a lightningbolt?


Messed with Texas.
 
2013-04-23 11:28:37 PM

skullkrusher: theknuckler_33: Dude, I have you farkied for being pedantic and now you are equating the kookie fringe church the folks from TFA belong to with 'mainstream churches'?

huh? No I'm not.

theknuckler_33: Dude, stick to the subject. The 'parable' from plavacek who then said it is told in a lot of Catholic churches. You get it now? That is the point here. THAT claim is farking bullshiat. The kooks from TFA are not from a 'mainstream church'. This isn't about the people from TFA, this isn't abou their church. This is about the farking retarded joke from plavacek being categorized as something that is preached regularly at Catholic masses which is pure farking bullshiat.

I can't tell if you're joking. You're all over the place.
As I said, I can't say that it is taught in many churches but I am familiar with it, I might've heard it in church. It isn't a story I'd be shocked to hear in church. I never said the assholes from TFA are from a mainstream church. I am referring to your incredulity that a Catholic church would preach such a story from the pulpit. I don't find it all that surprising.
You are waaaaaaaaaaaaaay too farking angry about this little story that's just meant to tell people to not just hope for a supernatural miracle from prayer but rather recognize the plain ways God helps you and answers your pleas for help.


I misunderstood your post big time. I'm only commenting about the idea that the 'parable' is actually some sort of teaching or sermon or whatever in the Catholic (or any other) church. It is so obviously nothing more than a joke. Crap, I have no desire to defend Caholics or Christians, in general, but that statement struck me the wrong way. That stupid joke is not any kind of teaching or whatever in any church anywhere ever. It is a stupid joke.
 
2013-04-23 11:34:16 PM
"...So then God says, 'Who did you think sent the boat and the helicopter?'"
 
2013-04-23 11:34:55 PM

El Dudereno: HindiDiscoMonster: Mr. Coffee Nerves: No matter one's personal theology (or lack thereof) I think we can all agree that if there is an afterlife these snapperheads have a permanent reservation in the room by the elevator in the most disused wing of the Endless Vuvuzela & Pan Flute Orchestra covers "Nickleback" Concert building adjacent to the Never-Ceasing Rerun of "Batman & Robin" Screen next to the Lake of Burning Hobo Semen where the roving Octo-Penised Rapenocerouses always have full bottles of Cialis.

isn't that across the hall from the Weird Al memorial polka room?

They didn't like the Nehru jacket he was wearing. He got into heaven, but they gave him the room next to the noisy ice machine.


Everything you know is wrong!!
 
2013-04-23 11:36:14 PM

theknuckler_33: I misunderstood your post big time. I'm only commenting about the idea that the 'parable' is actually some sort of teaching or sermon or whatever in the Catholic (or any other) church. It is so obviously nothing more than a joke. Crap, I have no desire to defend Caholics or Christians, in general, but that statement struck me the wrong way. That stupid joke is not any kind of teaching or whatever in any church anywhere ever. It is a stupid joke.


maybe I heard it from my drunk uncle, as I said. I could also see it as part of a "God wants you to be all you can be and to strive for goals rather than waiting for him to take care of everything" sermon too so I am really not ready to call it bullshiat.

In any case, it is clearly a good lesson beyond the "stupid joke" aspect. No matter how religious you are, no matter how hard you pray, if you don't take action and take advantage of opportunities as they arise, you're gonna fail. This is basically what his point was - these jackasses didn't have this mindset and believe God is omnipresent but can't recognize God in the mundane world of medicine and technology. No religious service I've ever attended has preached such a thing, therefore I am not surprised to hear that people have heard this story at church
 
2013-04-23 11:36:40 PM

skullkrusher: theknuckler_33: After reading your comment correctly (I misread it at first), I'm not really sure the point yo are trying to make. I am simply arguing against the idea that the joke 'parable' that we are talking about is some kind of regular teaching... basically anywhere. It is a joke. No church teaches it. Do you agree?

no, as I said I heard it years ago and I don't know who would've told me. Maybe it was in church, maybe the priest who lead our youth group get-togethers on Thursday nights during the summer, maybe my uncle who was 1/2 a bottle deep in some Jameson at Christmas... I don't remember. I don't find it out of line with anything I know that I've learned in 16 years of Catholic education though so if I suddenly remembered tomorrow that I did hear it during a homily, I wouldn't be the least bit surprised.


As someone who went through 12 years of Catholic eduction, was an alter-boy for 5 years, marched in May Day ceremonies for several years, went to and 'served' during stations of the cross for many years during my formative years, I never heard that 'story' ever in school or church. It is impossible for me to acknowledge that anyone cannot recognize that 'parable' as anything other than a slap in the face to anyone who believes in God. What could possibly be the lesson of that parable to a Catholic or any Christian?!? That story is preposterous from a theological standpoint. It mocks religion entirely. For goodness sakes, it is an atheist joke about religion.
 
2013-04-23 11:36:43 PM

Mellotiger: Trampled at a gay pride rally?


Started a nuclear war at the gay bar?
 
2013-04-23 11:38:22 PM

El Dudereno: HindiDiscoMonster: Mr. Coffee Nerves: No matter one's personal theology (or lack thereof) I think we can all agree that if there is an afterlife these snapperheads have a permanent reservation in the room by the elevator in the most disused wing of the Endless Vuvuzela & Pan Flute Orchestra covers "Nickleback" Concert building adjacent to the Never-Ceasing Rerun of "Batman & Robin" Screen next to the Lake of Burning Hobo Semen where the roving Octo-Penised Rapenocerouses always have full bottles of Cialis.

isn't that across the hall from the Weird Al memorial polka room?

They didn't like the Nehru jacket he was wearing. He got into heaven, but they gave him the room next to the noisy ice machine.


No, that's wrong.

In fact, everything you know is wrong.
 
2013-04-23 11:43:35 PM

theknuckler_33: As someone who went through 12 years of Catholic eduction, was an alter-boy for 5 years, marched in May Day ceremonies for several years


is that when they made you the communist you are today? ;)

theknuckler_33: It is impossible for me to acknowledge that anyone cannot recognize that 'parable' as anything other than a slap in the face to anyone who believes in God. What could possibly be the lesson of that parable to a Catholic or any Christian?!? That story is preposterous from a theological standpoint. It mocks religion entirely. For goodness sakes, it is an atheist joke about religion.


dude, chill out. There's nothing insulting or mocking of religion in that story. It's a joke mocking the fool who fervently prays and waits for the miraculous while ignoring the real life impact God has on his life. It mocks the moron who prays for a change in his life while ignoring the opportunities to realize that change.
The alternative to that story is what we have in TFA. THAT is far more insulting to religion than this story. That belief that an omnipotent God is only capable of working in miraculous ways, rather than through people who use their God given talents and the knowledge gained from the God given talents of those who went before to make "miracles" happen.
 
2013-04-23 11:45:50 PM

skullkrusher: theknuckler_33: I misunderstood your post big time. I'm only commenting about the idea that the 'parable' is actually some sort of teaching or sermon or whatever in the Catholic (or any other) church. It is so obviously nothing more than a joke. Crap, I have no desire to defend Caholics or Christians, in general, but that statement struck me the wrong way. That stupid joke is not any kind of teaching or whatever in any church anywhere ever. It is a stupid joke.

maybe I heard it from my drunk uncle, as I said. I could also see it as part of a "God wants you to be all you can be and to strive for goals rather than waiting for him to take care of everything" sermon too so I am really not ready to call it bullshiat.

In any case, it is clearly a good lesson beyond the "stupid joke" aspect. No matter how religious you are, no matter how hard you pray, if you don't take action and take advantage of opportunities as they arise, you're gonna fail. This is basically what his point was - these jackasses didn't have this mindset and believe God is omnipresent but can't recognize God in the mundane world of medicine and technology. No religious service I've ever attended has preached such a thing, therefore I am not surprised to hear that people have heard this story at church


Considering the fact that his comment was basically 'the catholic church teaches this joke I heard one time'.... I can't agree with what I bolded above.
 
2013-04-23 11:45:55 PM

nmrsnr: Clearly god did it. He would have saved them if he liked those kids.


or maybe he did like them & thats why they deaded.
perhaps its the ones that get better that he doesnt like & thats why he made them better. makes sense based on the nasty little buggers that are always at the local store screaming while their parents ignore them.


/teenagers go elsewhere... they keep damaging the tupas...
.
 
2013-04-23 11:46:05 PM
You know what would really be great? If the remaining children were fostered by gay couples.

That would be an awesome part to the punishment.
 
2013-04-23 11:52:10 PM

theknuckler_33: skullkrusher: theknuckler_33: I misunderstood your post big time. I'm only commenting about the idea that the 'parable' is actually some sort of teaching or sermon or whatever in the Catholic (or any other) church. It is so obviously nothing more than a joke. Crap, I have no desire to defend Caholics or Christians, in general, but that statement struck me the wrong way. That stupid joke is not any kind of teaching or whatever in any church anywhere ever. It is a stupid joke.

maybe I heard it from my drunk uncle, as I said. I could also see it as part of a "God wants you to be all you can be and to strive for goals rather than waiting for him to take care of everything" sermon too so I am really not ready to call it bullshiat.

In any case, it is clearly a good lesson beyond the "stupid joke" aspect. No matter how religious you are, no matter how hard you pray, if you don't take action and take advantage of opportunities as they arise, you're gonna fail. This is basically what his point was - these jackasses didn't have this mindset and believe God is omnipresent but can't recognize God in the mundane world of medicine and technology. No religious service I've ever attended has preached such a thing, therefore I am not surprised to hear that people have heard this story at church

Considering the fact that his comment was basically 'the catholic church teaches this joke I heard one time'.... I can't agree with what I bolded above.


Read the post again.
 
2013-04-23 11:53:41 PM

skullkrusher: theknuckler_33: As someone who went through 12 years of Catholic eduction, was an alter-boy for 5 years, marched in May Day ceremonies for several years

is that when they made you the communist you are today? ;)

theknuckler_33: It is impossible for me to acknowledge that anyone cannot recognize that 'parable' as anything other than a slap in the face to anyone who believes in God. What could possibly be the lesson of that parable to a Catholic or any Christian?!? That story is preposterous from a theological standpoint. It mocks religion entirely. For goodness sakes, it is an atheist joke about religion.

dude, chill out. There's nothing insulting or mocking of religion in that story. It's a joke mocking the fool who fervently prays and waits for the miraculous while ignoring the real life impact God has on his life. It mocks the moron who prays for a change in his life while ignoring the opportunities to realize that change.


That is entirely my point. It was a joke and only a joke. My issue was only with the statement that the joke was preached as some sort of standard Catholic (or any other Christian) teaching. I've made this point several times and is the only point I've wanted to make. For some reason, my point is not being acknowledged for what it is.
 
2013-04-23 11:56:38 PM
I, for one, am shocked that doing nothing and expecting god to fix your problems for you instead of doing something for yourself leads to poor results.

I mean, wasn't that the entire point of the parable of Adam and Eve? "You don't have to go fend for yourselves, no matter what. I'll always be here to take care of you." That's what god was saying when he kicked Adam and Eve out of Eden and told them to go fend for themselves because now they had knowledge and responsibility, right?
 
2013-04-23 11:56:51 PM

theknuckler_33: skullkrusher: theknuckler_33: As someone who went through 12 years of Catholic eduction, was an alter-boy for 5 years, marched in May Day ceremonies for several years

is that when they made you the communist you are today? ;)

theknuckler_33: It is impossible for me to acknowledge that anyone cannot recognize that 'parable' as anything other than a slap in the face to anyone who believes in God. What could possibly be the lesson of that parable to a Catholic or any Christian?!? That story is preposterous from a theological standpoint. It mocks religion entirely. For goodness sakes, it is an atheist joke about religion.

dude, chill out. There's nothing insulting or mocking of religion in that story. It's a joke mocking the fool who fervently prays and waits for the miraculous while ignoring the real life impact God has on his life. It mocks the moron who prays for a change in his life while ignoring the opportunities to realize that change.

That is entirely my point. It was a joke and only a joke. My issue was only with the statement that the joke was preached as some sort of standard Catholic (or any other Christian) teaching. I've made this point several times and is the only point I've wanted to make. For some reason, my point is not being acknowledged for what it is.


you never heard a joke made from the pulpit? I don't think it appears in the catechism anywhere but you've had a few people in this thread who are very familiar with it - who may or may not have heard it in church - and it is in no way contrary to any Church teaching and in fact supports what we learned in Catholic school and therefore could quite legitimately be used during a homily.
 
2013-04-23 11:57:19 PM

skullkrusher: theknuckler_33:Considering the fact that his comment was basically 'the catholic church teaches this joke I heard one time'.... I can't agree with what I bolded above.

Read the post again.


This part:

"This parable is told a lot in Catholic churches - "

Yup, read it again. Still pure bullshiat.
 
2013-04-23 11:58:17 PM
1492! Osmosis! Gerund! Your Mom!
 
2013-04-23 11:59:43 PM

theknuckler_33: skullkrusher: theknuckler_33: As someone who went through 12 years of Catholic eduction, was an alter-boy for 5 years, marched in May Day ceremonies for several years

is that when they made you the communist you are today? ;)

theknuckler_33: It is impossible for me to acknowledge that anyone cannot recognize that 'parable' as anything other than a slap in the face to anyone who believes in God. What could possibly be the lesson of that parable to a Catholic or any Christian?!? That story is preposterous from a theological standpoint. It mocks religion entirely. For goodness sakes, it is an atheist joke about religion.

dude, chill out. There's nothing insulting or mocking of religion in that story. It's a joke mocking the fool who fervently prays and waits for the miraculous while ignoring the real life impact God has on his life. It mocks the moron who prays for a change in his life while ignoring the opportunities to realize that change.

That is entirely my point. It was a joke and only a joke. My issue was only with the statement that the joke was preached as some sort of standard Catholic (or any other Christian) teaching. I've made this point several times and is the only point I've wanted to make. For some reason, my point is not being acknowledged for what it is.


For what it is worth: I have been part of some pretty lax congregations. It would be a stretch to call it a "Common Catholic parable" but if I haven't heard heard that joke in church (I heard it so long ago I don't remember where it was) I have heard ones similar. It isn't offensive and it makes a good point about God working for us in unexpected and simple ways. A good message to send since the same God that used to perform major miracles that would make crowds get down on bended knee is shy now that there are camcorders and cell phone cams.

It isn't unreasonable to think this joke was told in church, particularly with more contemporary non-denominationals out there.
 
2013-04-24 12:00:40 AM

skullkrusher: theknuckler_33: That is entirely my point. It was a joke and only a joke. My issue was only with the statement that the joke was preached as some sort of standard Catholic (or any other Christian) teaching. I've made this point several times and is the only point I've wanted to make. For some reason, my point is not being acknowledged for what it is.

you never heard a joke made from the pulpit? I don't think it appears in the catechism anywhere but you've had a few people in this thread who are very familiar with it - who may or may not have heard it in church - and it is in no way contrary to any Church teaching and in fact supports what we learned in Catholic school and therefore could quite legitimately be used during a homily.


Priests don't make joke that mock God. You get the joke, right?  God is telling the guy that he's an idiot, right? That's not the kind of God that they preach at church. You get that, right?
 
2013-04-24 12:01:40 AM

HindiDiscoMonster: Bonobo62: Idiots. Laughter is the best medicine. Not prayer. Laughter. Prayer is only the third-best medicine.

just think how healthy clowns must be...


Being terrifying is the best medicine?


MeanJean: You know what would really be great? If the remaining children were fostered by gay couples.

That would be an awesome part to the punishment.


Atheists. I think atheists are more reviled that gays these days.
 
2013-04-24 12:04:43 AM

theknuckler_33: skullkrusher: theknuckler_33:Considering the fact that his comment was basically 'the catholic church teaches this joke I heard one time'.... I can't agree with what I bolded above.

Read the post again.

This part:

"This parable is told a lot in Catholic churches - "

Yup, read it again. Still pure bullshiat.


I remember this from when I was a child in Catholic school. I believe a priest told the story at the time

http://wellspringfellowship.wordpress.com/2008/02/07/an-old-joke-or- a- parable-in-disguise/

2.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-04-24 12:05:27 AM
www.explosm.net
 
2013-04-24 12:06:09 AM

theknuckler_33: skullkrusher: theknuckler_33: That is entirely my point. It was a joke and only a joke. My issue was only with the statement that the joke was preached as some sort of standard Catholic (or any other Christian) teaching. I've made this point several times and is the only point I've wanted to make. For some reason, my point is not being acknowledged for what it is.

you never heard a joke made from the pulpit? I don't think it appears in the catechism anywhere but you've had a few people in this thread who are very familiar with it - who may or may not have heard it in church - and it is in no way contrary to any Church teaching and in fact supports what we learned in Catholic school and therefore could quite legitimately be used during a homily.

Priests don't make joke that mock God. You get the joke, right?  God is telling the guy that he's an idiot, right? That's not the kind of God that they preach at church. You get that, right?


No, God is telling the guy that sometimes He helps us in mundane ways and we need to be on the look out for it. I find your claim, that priests wouldn't tell this joke, absurd. Google it out, there are tons of references to priests and pastors telling this joke.
 
2013-04-24 12:07:26 AM

theknuckler_33: Priests don't make joke that mock God. You get the joke, right? God is telling the guy that he's an idiot, right? That's not the kind of God that they preach at church. You get that, right?


seriously? God will condemn someone to hell for eternity but won't offer a gentle rebuke? God is telling the guy that he tried to help but he wouldn't open his eyes to the obvious.

Does the footprints in the sand story piss you off too because it's Jesus calling the person lazy so he has to carry him? WTF dude?
 
2013-04-24 12:07:39 AM
Sadly, one less future Republican.
 
2013-04-24 12:08:55 AM
Here's a pastor telling that story to the President (in West Wing)
http://youtu.be/5Dj0nUT8brI

The moral of the story is so simple even religious people should be able to figure it out...

/then nature invents a better fool
 
2013-04-24 12:09:12 AM

jst3p: theknuckler_33: That is entirely my point. It was a joke and only a joke. My issue was only with the statement that the joke was preached as some sort of standard Catholic (or any other Christian) teaching. I've made this point several times and is the only point I've wanted to make. For some reason, my point is not being acknowledged for what it is.

For what it is worth: I have been part of some pretty lax congregations. It would be a stretch to call it a "Common Catholic parable" but if I haven't heard heard that joke in church (I heard it so long ago I don't remember where it was) I have heard ones similar. It isn't offensive and it makes a good point about God working for us in unexpected and simple ways. A good message to send since the same God that used to perform major miracles that would make crowds get down on bended knee is shy now that there are camcorders and cell phone cams.

It isn't unreasonable to think this joke was told in church, particularly with more contemporary non-denominationals out there.

'
Oh for goodness sakes. Fine. Mainstream religions preach that God tells people who pray to him for... whatever... that they are morans for not taking advantage of secular solutions to problems they face.
 
2013-04-24 12:11:00 AM
Oh for goodness sake, would you just drop it  theknuckler_33 about the freakin joke. The guy already said that he doesn't know where he heard it, except possibly in church. The fact that you're making such a big freaking deal about it is absurd. I don't have a Catholic education but I have gone to church for the past 19 or so years and I can verify that a lot of the ministers use jokes every now and then, either on the pulpit or for kids. It's just a cute christian themed joke, if it was an athiest joke, it wouldn't portray God as wise or actually trying to help the guy, it wouldn't have God being there at all. The fact that you think that it is a point that needs to be hammered in is annoying. Yes, the guy obviously doesn't know what goes on in all Catholic churches and maybe the church you went to, the priest never strayed from just reading the Bible but he wasn't making a thesis for God's sake, if it was a little off, so what. The message was relevant and funny. Geez
 
2013-04-24 12:12:18 AM
God didn't want any more of these stupid farkers littering the Earth.

/poor kids lost the genetic lottery
 
Displayed 50 of 354 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report