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(Yahoo)   Fark-ready headline of the week: Boston Bombing Amputee No Longer Fears 'Horrible Shin Splints'   ( divider line
    More: Obvious, Bombing Amputee, Boston Medical Center  
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5245 clicks; posted to Main » on 23 Apr 2013 at 7:58 PM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2013-04-23 09:01:14 PM  
2 votes:
Speaking of silver linings: You know what hasn't come up yet?  Amputee porn.  I know, weird and gross.  It exists.  I have seen girls giving what can only be described as "nub jobs" and these folks may have a new carreer.
/Just saying, every time a door closes and sh*t.
//why are you looking at me that way?
2013-04-23 08:38:05 PM  
2 votes:
"He saw Corcoran's mangled legs, rushed her to first aid tents and prayed strangers would take care of his daughter.

Sydney's femoral artery had been severed, but three passersby stayed with her, put pressure on the wound and tied a tourniquet around it to stop the bleeding, Carter said. The femoral artery is a main artery in the thigh, and Sydney's wound would have been fatal had the strangers not stopped to help her, doctors told Carter."

So dad chose wife over daughter.  That's going to be awkward at home...
2013-04-23 08:06:23 PM  
2 votes:
Love the comments.

"This is America. You will not beat us with fear and terror."

Uhh, have you stepped back and looked at your country lately? Someone beat you with fear and terror long ago.
2013-04-24 09:40:30 AM  
1 vote:

UsikFark: Now she'll have phantom limb splints.

Phantom splints can be a Menance. There is Obi Wan way to get rid of them. A Jar-Jar of Icy Hoth.

/I was gonna keep going with the puns, but I was afraid at that speed, I'd never be able to pull out in time.
2013-04-24 01:38:04 AM  
1 vote:
I was 14. Just a little older than Bobby. But I knew Uncle Sam needed me, so I lied and signed up.

We had beat the Nazis in Italy and they shipped us to the pacific theater. A Tojo torpedo sent our troop ship to the bottom. I could only save three of my buddies Fatty, Stinky and Brooklyn. They were kind of like you fellas only one of them was from Brooklyn.

Out of the sun came a Tojo zero. It put fifty bullets in my back. The blood attracted sharks. I had to give them Fatty.

Then things took a turn for the worse. I made it to an island, but it was full of Tojos. They were spitting on the U.S. flag, so I rushed them. But it was a trap. They opened fired and blew my shins off.

Last thing I remembered, I beat them all to death with a big piece of Fatty. I woke up in a field hospital and they were sewing my feet to my knees.
2013-04-23 10:32:03 PM  
1 vote:
I just came here to say that that band "The Shins" really suck.

They. Suck.

I feel better, thanks.

Carry on.
2013-04-23 09:56:07 PM  
1 vote:
I think she hopped to this conclusion a bit too early.
2013-04-23 09:29:42 PM  
1 vote:

DesktopHippie: jso2897: OK - this is it. I am officially sick and tired of hearing about the bombing, the bombers, the bombees, and farking Boston. There is other stuff happening in the world.

So... Go read those stories and comment in those threads. What are you whining in here for?

Just to piss you off, personally.
2013-04-23 08:51:35 PM  
1 vote:
Was this playing in the background?
2013-04-23 08:30:58 PM  
1 vote:
Just a flesh wound.
2013-04-23 08:01:10 PM  
1 vote:
Now she'll have phantom limb splints.
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