If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(KTVB Boise)   Worst female driver in the world vs. biggest douchebags in the world   (ktvb.com) divider line 173
    More: Fail, bike lanes  
•       •       •

23153 clicks; posted to Main » on 22 Apr 2013 at 10:22 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



173 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | » | Last | Show all
 
2013-04-22 07:57:06 PM
Not shown: the bike lane entrance.

/lazy assholes
 
2013-04-22 08:01:56 PM
animationsa2z.com
 
2013-04-22 08:11:25 PM
2.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-04-22 08:34:44 PM
Subby, you had the beginnings of a good, multi-faceted troll here, but I'm afraid that, frankly, you blew it. Yes, you got the "biggest douchebags" reference in there for the bike riders, and that's going to cause a nice but somewhat predictable flare up between oblivious bike riders who think they own the road and waddling blubber cushions who couldn't ride half a mile if their life depended on it and are therefore jealous that they'll never be able to wear spandex without a very real risk of causing permanent blindness. But "worst female driver in the world"? Come on, is that supposed to enrage women or something? Being the "worst female driver" is only saying something about that one driver. It's not saying anything about female drivers in general. In fact, if you just take the words at their literal sense, it's actually not an insult at all. It takes the "worst female driver in the world" to do something like this? I guess all the rest of them must be pretty good drivers then, huh? At least good enough to not have this happen, anyway.

Now, let's look at this another way. What if she's not "the worst female driver in the world" but is rather a "typical female driver?" A fair representative, in other words, of all women drivers. Now  that would be saying something. And what if we just tweaked the overall tone of the headline, made it a question. People like headlines that are questions...it pulls them in, makes them want to click the link to see if the answer they've already shaped in their head fits the actual scenario. So, instead of "worst female driver in the world vs. the biggest douchebags in the world," maybe you'd have something like this:

What happens when a typical female driver meets the biggest douchebags on the road?"

or, for something even punchier and more direct:

Woman driver vs. douchebags. Who loses?

Lots of other possibilities, too. The main thing to remember is to not go overboard with the hyperbole. Lots of times, things are funnier when you present them as mundane. That's true even when you're talking about the sort of simpletons who live in Idaho.
 
2013-04-22 08:41:16 PM
This is exactly why we shouldn't have bike lanes: they make things terribly unsafe for drivers.
 
2013-04-22 09:10:21 PM
Holy shiat, they have bike lanes on bridges out there?

Man. My area sucks for bike riders.
 
2013-04-22 10:25:01 PM
I hate to do this but she was driving a Pontiac Parisiennet?
/surely not right
 
2013-04-22 10:25:24 PM
The driver was not cited.

The fark?!
 
2013-04-22 10:28:19 PM
That reminds me, I need to clean off the lycra that's stuck to my bumper.
 
2013-04-22 10:28:32 PM

lordargent: The driver was not cited.

The fark?!


They never showed her or gave her name, I'm willing to bet she was old as hell. Retirees get away with a lot of shiat.
 
2013-04-22 10:29:44 PM

Pocket Ninja: Subby, you had the beginnings of a good, multi-faceted troll here, but I'm afraid that, frankly, you blew it. Yes, you got the "biggest douchebags" reference in there for the bike riders, and that's going to cause a nice but somewhat predictable flare up between oblivious bike riders who think they own the road and waddling blubber cushions who couldn't ride half a mile if their life depended on it and are therefore jealous that they'll never be able to wear spandex without a very real risk of causing permanent blindness. But "worst female driver in the world"? Come on, is that supposed to enrage women or something? Being the "worst female driver" is only saying something about that one driver. It's not saying anything about female drivers in general. In fact, if you just take the words at their literal sense, it's actually not an insult at all. It takes the "worst female driver in the world" to do something like this? I guess all the rest of them must be pretty good drivers then, huh? At least good enough to not have this happen, anyway.

Now, let's look at this another way. What if she's not "the worst female driver in the world" but is rather a "typical female driver?" A fair representative, in other words, of all women drivers. Now  that would be saying something. And what if we just tweaked the overall tone of the headline, made it a question. People like headlines that are questions...it pulls them in, makes them want to click the link to see if the answer they've already shaped in their head fits the actual scenario. So, instead of "worst female driver in the world vs. the biggest douchebags in the world," maybe you'd have something like this:

What happens when a typical female driver meets the biggest douchebags on the road?"

or, for something even punchier and more direct:

Woman driver vs. douchebags. Who loses?

Lots of other possibilities, too. The main thing to remember is to not go overboard with the hyperbole. Lots of times, things are funnier when ...


8/10
 
2013-04-22 10:30:43 PM

lordargent: The driver was not cited.

The fark?!


No laws were broken.
 
2013-04-22 10:30:50 PM

Pocket Ninja: [text]


Not just (quietly) hilarious, but terrific writing advice.  Plus a nice punch at the end.  Quality throughout.
 
2013-04-22 10:32:18 PM

lordargent: The driver was not cited.

The fark?!


Pussy pass
 
2013-04-22 10:32:54 PM

Pocket Ninja: Subby, you had the beginnings of a good, multi-faceted troll here, but I'm afraid that, frankly, you blew it. Yes, you got the "biggest douchebags" reference in there for the bike riders, and that's going to cause a nice but somewhat predictable flare up between oblivious bike riders who think they own the road and waddling blubber cushions who couldn't ride half a mile if their life depended on it and are therefore jealous that they'll never be able to wear spandex without a very real risk of causing permanent blindness. But "worst female driver in the world"? Come on, is that supposed to enrage women or something? Being the "worst female driver" is only saying something about that one driver. It's not saying anything about female drivers in general. In fact, if you just take the words at their literal sense, it's actually not an insult at all. It takes the "worst female driver in the world" to do something like this? I guess all the rest of them must be pretty good drivers then, huh? At least good enough to not have this happen, anyway.

Now, let's look at this another way. What if she's not "the worst female driver in the world" but is rather a "typical female driver?" A fair representative, in other words, of all women drivers. Now  that would be saying something. And what if we just tweaked the overall tone of the headline, made it a question. People like headlines that are questions...it pulls them in, makes them want to click the link to see if the answer they've already shaped in their head fits the actual scenario. So, instead of "worst female driver in the world vs. the biggest douchebags in the world," maybe you'd have something like this:

What happens when a typical female driver meets the biggest douchebags on the road?"

or, for something even punchier and more direct:

Woman driver vs. douchebags. Who loses?

Lots of other possibilities, too. The main thing to remember is to not go overboard with the hyperbole. Lots of times, things are funnier when you present them as mundane. That's true even when you're talking about the sort of simpletons who live in Idaho.


Got damn, you're a genius!
 
2013-04-22 10:33:16 PM

doglover: lordargent: The driver was not cited.

The fark?!

No laws were broken.


I'm pretty sure operating a motor vehicle on a designated bike path is illegal in most states.
 
2013-04-22 10:34:08 PM

keypusher: Pocket Ninja: [text]

Not just (quietly) hilarious, but terrific writing advice.  Plus a nice punch at the end.  Quality throughout.


Agreed, that why PN's a favorite.
 
2013-04-22 10:35:08 PM

Pocket Ninja: Subby, you had the beginnings of a good, multi-faceted troll here, but I'm afraid that, frankly, you blew it. Yes, you got the "biggest douchebags" reference in there for the bike riders, and that's going to cause a nice but somewhat predictable flare up between oblivious bike riders who think they own the road and waddling blubber cushions who couldn't ride half a mile if their life depended on it and are therefore jealous that they'll never be able to wear spandex without a very real risk of causing permanent blindness. But "worst female driver in the world"? Come on, is that supposed to enrage women or something? Being the "worst female driver" is only saying something about that one driver. It's not saying anything about female drivers in general. In fact, if you just take the words at their literal sense, it's actually not an insult at all. It takes the "worst female driver in the world" to do something like this? I guess all the rest of them must be pretty good drivers then, huh? At least good enough to not have this happen, anyway.

Now, let's look at this another way. What if she's not "the worst female driver in the world" but is rather a "typical female driver?" A fair representative, in other words, of all women drivers. Now  that would be saying something. And what if we just tweaked the overall tone of the headline, made it a question. People like headlines that are questions...it pulls them in, makes them want to click the link to see if the answer they've already shaped in their head fits the actual scenario. So, instead of "worst female driver in the world vs. the biggest douchebags in the world,"
maybe you'd have something like this:

What happens when a typical female driver meets the biggest douchebags on the road?"

or, for something even punchier and more direct:

Woman driver vs. douchebags. Who loses?

Lots of other possibilities, too. The main thing to remember is to not go overboard with the hyperbole. Lots of times, things are funnier when ...

 
2013-04-22 10:35:51 PM

Lando Lincoln: Holy shiat, they have bike lanes on bridges out there?

Man. My area sucks for bike riders.


When staying in Virginia to attend a rally in the District of Columbia, I rented a bicycle and cycled across the Potomac River by way of a designated cycling/pedestrian lane on a bridge.
 
2013-04-22 10:36:05 PM
Don't they usually put a post in the middle of the entrances to stop that?
 
2013-04-22 10:36:06 PM

alienated: Pocket Ninja: Subby,

8/10


What part was trolling? I thought that was pretty sage advice. Unless that was just a grading compared to his other works, then I can't really argue.
 
2013-04-22 10:36:22 PM

max_pooper: doglover: lordargent: The driver was not cited.

The fark?!

No laws were broken.

I'm pretty sure operating a motor vehicle on a designated bike path is illegal in most states.


Plus I'm fairly certain they could have nailed her for distracted driving.
 
2013-04-22 10:37:04 PM
We have a new experimental bike lane here in Chicago.

Two-way bike traffic on a one-way street.

With separate red & green traffic lights for bikes.

I think it's going to confuse the fark out of everybody - drivers, cyclists and pedestrians.

/ Cyclist

lh3.googleusercontent.com
 
2013-04-22 10:38:40 PM

max_pooper: doglover: lordargent: The driver was not cited.

The fark?!

No laws were broken.

I'm pretty sure operating a motor vehicle on a designated bike path is illegal in most states.


Female Driver.
 
2013-04-22 10:39:48 PM

scottydoesntknow: What part was trolling?


It wasnt, or maybe it was. I gave the post 8 points for content. It might have been 9/10 if he had used Downtown Bumfarkville i/o Idaho
 
2013-04-22 10:39:59 PM

jaytkay: We have a new experimental bike lane here in Chicago.

Two-way bike traffic on a one-way street.

With separate red & green traffic lights for bikes.

I think it's going to confuse the fark out of everybody - drivers, cyclists and pedestrians.

/ Cyclist

[lh3.googleusercontent.com image 480x638]


Well you can't make an omelette without cracking a few eggs...

That's pretty farked up though. Why would cyclists need separate lights?
 
2013-04-22 10:40:06 PM
not cited?

Well, she'll just keep doing it again and again then.  If you don't start citing people, everyone will want to get stuck in that bike lane for an hour.
 
2013-04-22 10:40:09 PM
FTFA: Some bikers, however, had trouble getting around the car.

Ahhh... The irony...

/boo-f*cking-hoo
 
2013-04-22 10:40:39 PM
Pathetic of them not to show where she turned onto the bike path from.  I chased it down on google maps and it doesn't appear to be signed as bikes only, but it doesn't look like the kind of road you should be turning down, either.  It looks like a service road or bike path.
 
2013-04-22 10:41:37 PM
I read the headline and immediately thought it was about Danica vs. the rest of the Nascar field.
 
2013-04-22 10:41:51 PM

Grave_Girl: max_pooper: doglover: lordargent: The driver was not cited.

The fark?!

No laws were broken.

I'm pretty sure operating a motor vehicle on a designated bike path is illegal in most states.

Plus I'm fairly certain they could have nailed her for distracted driving.


Yeah I'm not really sure how she escaped with no citation here. You get tickets for driving in a painted bike lane in my town.

And that is so totally not the world's worst female driver. This one is worse, at least.
 
2013-04-22 10:42:03 PM

EViLTeW: Pathetic of them not to show where she turned onto the bike path from.  I chased it down on google maps and it doesn't appear to be signed as bikes only, but it doesn't look like the kind of road you should be turning down, either.  It looks like a service road or bike path.


www.careercapitalist.com

RECALCULATING!
 
2013-04-22 10:43:09 PM

Pocket Ninja: Subby, you had the beginnings of a good, multi-faceted troll here, but I'm afraid that, frankly, you blew it. Yes, you got the "biggest douchebags" reference in there for the bike riders, and that's going to cause a nice but somewhat predictable flare up between oblivious bike riders who think they own the road and waddling blubber cushions who couldn't ride half a mile if their life depended on it and are therefore jealous that they'll never be able to wear spandex without a very real risk of causing permanent blindness.


I would have gone with a "Tour de Fark You" reference [nsfw language], myself.
 
2013-04-22 10:43:33 PM
"biggest douchebags in the world"? ... subby sounds fat
 
2013-04-22 10:43:37 PM
Do not understand. Installing one of these won't work, why?
farm3.staticflickr.com
 
2013-04-22 10:44:09 PM
He could not believe the driver was not cited, and that this was not the first time a driver had entered the bikepath from the Washington side. Safety procedures need to be changed on that end of the bridge, he said.

So in the same breath, this guy acknowledged that there is a procedural problem that has been at least partially responsible for this on more than one occasion, and implied that she should be punished for her mistake, regardless?
 
2013-04-22 10:44:39 PM
When I was 17, was arrested for being drunk... in... pub-lic. One DWI, which was a bogus charge because they were stopping everybody that was drivin' down that particular sidewalk... and that's profilin'... and profilin' is wrong.
 
2013-04-22 10:44:41 PM
This headline has given PN a chance to teach us all a valuable lesson in trolling. Headline success. Perhaps all along it was some sort of nega-troll to troll PN to teaching the original subby his ways? The world may never know.
 
2013-04-22 10:45:50 PM
Can we really call her the WORST female drive?  She was still technically on a roadway
 
2013-04-22 10:46:10 PM

scottydoesntknow: That's pretty farked up though. Why would cyclists need separate lights?


Left-turning cars and non-turning bikes get separate green light time.

It looks like a clusterfark - too many different signals and lanes.

We'll see.Bike season is just getting underway. I would be happy to be wrong about it.
 
2013-04-22 10:47:31 PM
data.motor-talk.de
The driver was just trying to get to the Country Kitchen Buffet.
 
gja [TotalFark]
2013-04-22 10:47:54 PM

A Shambling Mound: Grave_Girl: max_pooper: doglover: lordargent: The driver was not cited.

The fark?!

No laws were broken.

I'm pretty sure operating a motor vehicle on a designated bike path is illegal in most states.

Plus I'm fairly certain they could have nailed her for distracted driving.

Yeah I'm not really sure how she escaped with no citation here. You get tickets for driving in a painted bike lane in my town.

And that is so totally not the world's worst female driver. This one is worse, at least.


LOL...
"Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there".

/with a cancellation notice
//and a remedial driving course requirement
//and a new policy in the assigned risk pool of the state
 
2013-04-22 10:49:19 PM

Pocket Ninja: Subby, you had the beginnings of a good, multi-faceted troll here, but I'm afraid that, frankly, you blew it. Yes, you got the "biggest douchebags" reference in there for the bike riders, and that's going to cause a nice but somewhat predictable flare up between oblivious bike riders who think they own the road and waddling blubber cushions who couldn't ride half a mile if their life depended on it and are therefore jealous that they'll never be able to wear spandex without a very real risk of causing permanent blindness. But "worst female driver in the world"? Come on, is that supposed to enrage women or something? Being the "worst female driver" is only saying something about that one driver. It's not saying anything about female drivers in general. In fact, if you just take the words at their literal sense, it's actually not an insult at all. It takes the "worst female driver in the world" to do something like this? I guess all the rest of them must be pretty good drivers then, huh? At least good enough to not have this happen, anyway.

Now, let's look at this another way. What if she's not "the worst female driver in the world" but is rather a "typical female driver?" A fair representative, in other words, of all women drivers. Now  that would be saying something. And what if we just tweaked the overall tone of the headline, made it a question. People like headlines that are questions...it pulls them in, makes them want to click the link to see if the answer they've already shaped in their head fits the actual scenario. So, instead of "worst female driver in the world vs. the biggest douchebags in the world," maybe you'd have something like this:

What happens when a typical female driver meets the biggest douchebags on the road?"

or, for something even punchier and more direct:

Woman driver vs. douchebags. Who loses?

Lots of other possibilities, too. The main thing to remember is to not go overboard with the hyperbole. Lots of times, things are funnier when ...


tldr
wtf, write a longer reply on fark, brah
 
2013-04-22 10:49:19 PM
Worst female driver? Impossible. I'm certain my mother-in-law was no where near there when this happened.
 
2013-04-22 10:49:38 PM
Good luck, everybody.
i2.ytimg.com
 
2013-04-22 10:49:43 PM
Just returns for some of the crap bikers pull off in traffic. Although, still doesn't beat the random woman that just walked into the street 20 feet in front of me this morning pushing a cart full of little debbie snacks.

/she doesn't have a cart now
//i need a new bumper
 
2013-04-22 10:49:51 PM
Actually, I'd say that when they stick the bike lane is when cyclists are NOT being douchebags.

It's when they insist on being treated like regular road traffic but then break the rules of the road that they come off like douchebags.

Generally speaking, the way to tell if a person on a bike is an ass if by their clothing. Jeans & t-shirt? Normal bike commuter just trying not to get killed. Lycra or Spandex outfit? Douchebag.
 
2013-04-22 10:49:54 PM

jaytkay: We have a new experimental bike lane here in Chicago.

Two-way bike traffic on a one-way street.

With separate red & green traffic lights for bikes.

I think it's going to confuse the fark out of everybody - drivers, cyclists and pedestrians.

/ Cyclist

[lh3.googleusercontent.com image 480x638]


Considering most bike messengers, cabbies, and pedestrians don't give a flying fark about the traffic laws already in place, something tells me this will end poorly.

/Can't wait for this disaster to turn Ashland into a wasteland.
 
2013-04-22 10:51:43 PM
That bike lane is wider than most streets in Manhattan.
 
2013-04-22 10:51:53 PM

jaytkay: We have a new experimental bike lane here in Chicago.

Two-way bike traffic on a one-way street.

With separate red & green traffic lights for bikes.

I think it's going to confuse the fark out of everybody - drivers, cyclists and pedestrians.

/ Cyclist

[lh3.googleusercontent.com image 480x638]


Well I'll be dipped. That's news to me!
 
Displayed 50 of 173 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report