Do you have adblock enabled?
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Fox News)   Come and listen to a story bout a network named Discovery, desperately seeking ratings recovery. Then one day they were talking to some fools, spending their own money looking for some crude. Oil that is, black gold, Texas tea   (foxnews.com) divider line 31
    More: Interesting  
•       •       •

3306 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 22 Apr 2013 at 12:52 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



31 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread
 
2013-04-22 11:40:16 AM  
I am so glad I cut the cable/satellite cord. I just can't justify paying for this kind of crap.

Bonus: i was not as nearly upset s those around me that watched the news non-stop last week.
 
2013-04-22 11:43:27 AM  
Rednecks doing stupid shiat with heavy machinery/boats/chainsaws/alligators
New this season on Discovery
 
2013-04-22 11:56:09 AM  

sammyk: I am so glad I cut the cable/satellite cord. I just can't justify paying for this kind of crap.

Bonus: i was not as nearly upset s those around me that watched the news non-stop last week.


I'm a whole lot less stressed out and a whole lot happier now that I basically only good at Google News once in the morning and then after dinner at night.

Actually considering a paper news subscription. As much as I really thrived off constant, high-intensity data flows earlier in my life, I really have come to appreciate only checking in now and then with the news, and not needing it in real time.
 
2013-04-22 12:14:07 PM  
You are really desperate for story ideas when you bet the budget on someone striking oil in his back yard.
 
2013-04-22 12:32:15 PM  
FTFA:  "'Backyard Oil' is our first foray into the comedy space, and it's comedy at its finest. It's a great sweet spot for us because they are drilling for oil but they happen to be hilarious as well,"

Oh, what will be hilarious is when one of these amateurs loses some fingers or an arm in the drilling chain, or they have a blowout, or they hit sour gas and turf everyone downwind because there is absolutely no geology or seismic or safety controls./worked in the oilpatch lots of years, these guys are nucking futs
 
2013-04-22 12:52:44 PM  
I had to double check to make sure that wasn't an Onion article
 
2013-04-22 01:04:32 PM  
The only show I still watch with any regularity on Discovery is MythBusters, which has really gone downhill in quality the past couple seasons (but I'll still tune in for the season premiere in a couple weeks).

Really miss Survivorman sometimes.... Man vs. Wild just sucks.
 
2013-04-22 01:05:08 PM  

unyon: FTFA:  "'Backyard Oil' is our first foray into the comedy space, and it's comedy at its finest. It's a great sweet spot for us because they are drilling for oil but they happen to be hilarious as well,"

Oh, what will be hilarious is when one of these amateurs loses some fingers or an arm in the drilling chain, or they have a blowout, or they hit sour gas and turf everyone downwind because there is absolutely no geology or seismic or safety controls./worked in the oilpatch lots of years, these guys are nucking futs


Yeah it looks like backyard engineering at its finest. At least one of them will die or lose a limb.
 
2013-04-22 01:10:43 PM  
Just a guess, how long would it take these networks to go out of business if they couldn't do reality TV anymore?
 
2013-04-22 01:22:50 PM  
FTA: "According to Reliford, the DIY drilling boom is growing so rapidly, the United States may one day not need to rely on foreign reserves."
So, no ACTUAL reality.
 
2013-04-22 01:23:30 PM  
I'm tired of watching mundane idiots do mundane, idiotic things.

Probably won't be getting cable when the time comes to graduate and find an apartment next year.

Futurama is cancelled again, Beavis and Butthead is up for auction (doesn't match MTV's demo anymore)... cable is dead to me.
 
2013-04-22 01:24:06 PM  

unyon: FTFA:  "'Backyard Oil' is our first foray into the comedy space, and it's comedy at its finest. It's a great sweet spot for us because they are drilling for oil but they happen to be hilarious as well,"

Oh, what will be hilarious is when one of these amateurs loses some fingers or an arm in the drilling chain, or they have a blowout, or they hit sour gas and turf everyone downwind because there is absolutely no geology or seismic or safety controls./worked in the oilpatch lots of years, these guys are nucking futs


Blowing up a 4 block area of residential housing should attract a few viewers.
 
2013-04-22 01:25:45 PM  

Supes: The only show I still watch with any regularity on Discovery is MythBusters, which has really gone downhill in quality the past couple seasons (but I'll still tune in for the season premiere in a couple weeks).

Really miss Survivorman sometimes.... Man vs. Wild just sucks.


I miss the stuff from the '90s, the plane and machinery stuff.
 
2013-04-22 01:30:18 PM  

groppet: unyon: FTFA:  "'Backyard Oil' is our first foray into the comedy space, and it's comedy at its finest. It's a great sweet spot for us because they are drilling for oil but they happen to be hilarious as well,"

Oh, what will be hilarious is when one of these amateurs loses some fingers or an arm in the drilling chain, or they have a blowout, or they hit sour gas and turf everyone downwind because there is absolutely no geology or seismic or safety controls./worked in the oilpatch lots of years, these guys are nucking futs

Yeah it looks like backyard engineering at its finest. At least one of them will die or lose a limb.


The could schedule the limb reattachment surgery during sweeps week.
 
2013-04-22 01:35:06 PM  
I'm calling shenanigans.  The whole thing has to be filmed somewhere in California (I'm looking right at you,  Justified).

No way a guy named "French Horwitz" would ever enter eastern Kentucky and make it out alive.
 
2013-04-22 01:35:12 PM  

TheBeastOfYuccaFlats: sammyk: I am so glad I cut the cable/satellite cord. I just can't justify paying for this kind of crap.

Bonus: i was not as nearly upset s those around me that watched the news non-stop last week.

I'm a whole lot less stressed out and a whole lot happier now that I basically only good at Google News once in the morning and then after dinner at night.

Actually considering a paper news subscription. As much as I really thrived off constant, high-intensity data flows earlier in my life, I really have come to appreciate only checking in now and then with the news, and not needing it in real time.


The benefits of an actual newsPAPER are manyfold - if you'll pardon the pun.

If you drop it, it'll still work - unless it's in a puddle, in which case you'll have to buy a new one (cost: a buck or less)

When you're done with it, you can give it to someone else without invoking DMCA. (between you and me, I share it with a friend - he gets the sports section first, I get business - we trade after a few minutes)

Rolled up, it makes a safe but effective took in training both children and dogs. And unrolled, it helps clean up the results of incomplete training.

If there is an article you find interesting, you can "cut" that article and pass it along, using open-source tools such as scissors. In a pinch, hands work well, though not quite as neat.

The credibility of a news source is often related to the number of times the page is printed. One vertical fold = grain 'o' salt. Two folds = trust but verify.

I have never had to throw away a computer because the newspaper infected it.

For dramatic emphasis at meetings, I have tossed a newspaper across the table without ever being charged with assault, or p*ssing off the IT guy.

When I have finished reading the newspaper, it has many secondary purposes. One of the less-recognized purposes is insulation in extreme cold. For all the good that a web site has done, it has never kept me from freezing to death. It can be recycled with low cost and high efficiency. It can be used to protect items - such as an iPad - during shipping.

Best, the people who print it can't go back and change the content once they print it, so you can look at previous editions to see if the publisher is a credible news source, or Rupert Murdoch.
 
2013-04-22 01:36:45 PM  
...up came a lady, totally nude. Naked, that is. Buck wild.

Next thing you know ole Jed's in bed, bangin that lady till his balls turned red...

That's how I completed the song and discovery's ratings gambit in my head.
 
2013-04-22 01:39:26 PM  

unyon: FTFA:  "'Backyard Oil' is our first foray into the comedy space, and it's comedy at its finest. It's a great sweet spot for us because they are drilling for oil but they happen to be hilarious as well,"

Oh, what will be hilarious is when one of these amateurs loses some fingers or an arm in the drilling chain, or they have a blowout, or they hit sour gas and turf everyone downwind because there is absolutely no geology or seismic or safety controls./worked in the oilpatch lots of years, these guys are nucking futs


Or when they strike oil and realize they don't own the mineral rights to their property.
 
2013-04-22 01:44:32 PM  
So...ratings continue to drop, so they keep making reality shows...and ratings continue to drop?

I
 
2013-04-22 01:53:09 PM  
I miss discovery.
 
2013-04-22 01:59:36 PM  
I'll still watch Deadliest Catch, but other than that, a big ole "meh" for Discovery right now.

I guess this is just another "oh hey look - people will identify with morons so long as we make sure they have silly beards" rip-off program?
 
2013-04-22 02:01:36 PM  
Waiting for the call from History channel for their ripoff version of this show.
 
2013-04-22 02:04:01 PM  
Dammit image was thrown away

images.forbes.com
 
2013-04-22 02:44:26 PM  
Fark Discovery, History, and TLC with a rusty cheese grater.
 
2013-04-22 02:54:40 PM  
Supes:

Really miss Survivorman sometimes.... Man vs. Wild just sucks.

This
 
2013-04-22 03:00:33 PM  
I am so happy I cut cable all the shows I read about make me think of "The stupid, it burns!"
 
2013-04-22 03:28:40 PM  

Do the needful: Or when they strike oil and realize they don't own the mineral rights to their property.


I presumed that, at a minimum, they owned the mineral rights.  Around here (Alberta) you simply can't even acquire ownership of mineral rights anymore when buying property.  I have a 1/32nd interest in a piece of land with 3 producing wells and a gas well (family farm from two generations ago), and that sort of fractionalization is pretty common.  Most mineral rights today are a maze of fractional and crown ownership.  The only leases landowners get paid on regularly are surface rights to get to those wells.

You also can't punch a hole wherever you like in this country.  Where some parts of the US looks like this:
ak0.picdn.net

Alberta looks like this:

www.travelwestvisual.com

Its less wild west, more tightly regulated.  You can't 'drink someone elses milkshake' here.
 
2013-04-22 04:00:43 PM  

sammyk: I am so glad I cut the cable/satellite cord. I just can't justify paying for this kind of crap.

Bonus: i was not as nearly upset s those around me that watched the news non-stop last week.


We're seriously considering cutting the cord once this season of Game of Thrones is over. The price keeps going up and up and the quality just keeps going in the shiatter. I figure we could get a better value from subscription streaming services. We already have Netflix which is great and getting better. I figure by the time GoT season 4 comes out HBO will have wised up and let people subscribe to HBO Go without needing a cable subscription.
 
2013-04-22 04:08:07 PM  
Well the first thing you know
TLC has cloned the show
So our lawyers said
"Let's get litigious, bro!"
They filed a bunch of writs
In Superior Court DC
So we all said what the fark
And changed the channel to big B
Bravo that is
Gay Persians
Nutty housewives
 
2013-04-22 04:34:16 PM  

xalres: sammyk: I am so glad I cut the cable/satellite cord. I just can't justify paying for this kind of crap.

Bonus: i was not as nearly upset s those around me that watched the news non-stop last week.

We're seriously considering cutting the cord once this season of Game of Thrones is over. The price keeps going up and up and the quality just keeps going in the shiatter. I figure we could get a better value from subscription streaming services. We already have Netflix which is great and getting better. I figure by the time GoT season 4 comes out HBO will have wised up and let people subscribe to HBO Go without needing a cable subscription.


That is one of the shows we considered. We decided we didn't need to see it the second it comes out. Sooner or later it will be on amazon instant video for $3.99/episode. It's pretty easy to justify any amount of AIV when I don't have that $100+ satellite bill every month. My teenage daughter loves it. When she has her little slumber parties I tell her to go nuts. I just don't care if she spends $20-$30 streaming movies over the weekend. It all stays in the library and I might want to watch some of it later and I'm still saving a lot every month. I'd also add hulu if you are going to do it, for $8/mo its hard to beat. There is a lot of overlap with netflix and it is ad supported. But you get many more shows the day after original airing and the quality of the stream has been great for me.

I finally talked my wife into by telling her summer is here. Let's do a 90 day cutoff, if we want it back at the end, fine we will get it. After a week we both decided we were fine and will not be going back.
 
2013-04-22 07:28:04 PM  
I know a few people in Kentucky and Tennessee who own small oil wells, So I'm getting a kick out of this............
 
Displayed 31 of 31 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
Advertisement
On Twitter





In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report