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(Jezebel)   What men want from a relationship is not a place to recharge, nor feel secure, nor where we can be ourselves but a growth experience where the man listens to a woman's every thought and worry and figures out what her facial expression means   (jezebel.com) divider line 106
    More: Followup, interpersonal relationship, economic growths  
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12385 clicks; posted to Main » on 22 Apr 2013 at 7:16 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
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Archived thread
2013-04-22 07:23:56 AM
13 votes:
I just want her to stop laughing when I take off my pants.
2013-04-22 07:22:00 AM
9 votes:
i2.kym-cdn.com

Wow. Too early for gibberish like that.
2013-04-22 12:43:36 AM
7 votes:
25.media.tumblr.com
2013-04-22 08:23:57 AM
6 votes:

Oblio13: Advice to young men: The most spoiled and privileged women in the world are also the most whiney and entitled. Before you settle down, visit some other countries and meet a few whose factory default isn't "alimony bomb looking for a place to go off".


You spelled, DON'T GET MARRIED wrong.
2013-04-22 06:56:43 AM
5 votes:
We want a place where we don't have to be on our best behavior, where we don't have to walk on egg shells and where we don't have to pretend that we're something we're not

That place was work, until women came along and started making all kind of rules. Now, you try to be yourself and the sewing circle in HR sends you off to Diversity Training. Just pinch an intern's butt, and you'll be spending the next week listening to some fat lesbian talk about her feelings. Women have only themselves to blame if we want home to be a little more relaxed as a result.
2013-04-22 02:10:13 AM
5 votes:
Jezebel is my favorite comedy site. They're good.
2013-04-22 12:50:07 PM
4 votes:
forshiggles.files.wordpress.com
2013-04-22 11:36:12 AM
4 votes:
www.dumpaday.com
2013-04-22 11:22:34 AM
4 votes:

WhippingBoy: I just ran upstairs to grab a cup of coffee and got railroaded into a one-sided "discussion" about whether or not my wife should wear socks today (I wish I was kidding). Apparently, "what the fark do I care" means that I'm an insensitive jerk.


Well you ARE an insensitive jerk. Sheesh. Try acknowledging her feelings for a change. Like this:
"It sounds like you're worried about whether to wear socks today or not. I think you should wear what makes you feel comfortable. In the meantime, anytime you start to stress over something trivial and get the urge to talk about it, feel free to put my dick in your mouth instead. It will make you feel better. Everything will be alright."
2013-04-22 08:17:57 AM
4 votes:

SDRR: AdrienVeidt: We'll, im convinced. Time to lop off my cock so I can be a better person. Who's with me, boys?

Sorry, pal, you're on your own with that one.


Now now, don't be hasty.

I will also lop off AdrienVeidt's cock if it will make me a better person.
2013-04-22 07:27:13 AM
4 votes:
I heard it's perfectly legal to punch Jezebel authors in the face.
2013-04-22 09:44:39 AM
3 votes:
Do you think she'd mind if I sent her a penis collage?
2013-04-22 08:37:16 AM
3 votes:

Sudo_Make_Me_A_Sandwich: I'm an introvert who spends all day teaching kids. When I come home, I need some quiet time in order to recover from the massive amounts of energy being constantly socially engaged costs me. I don't necessarily want to spend an hour after work discussing how my day working with kids went and how my girlfriend's day working with kids went. I don't see why this makes me a bad person as the author seems to believe.


Becuase the world revolves around the female in a relationship and whatever you do or want doesn't matter because you are a 'penis person'.
2013-04-22 08:23:58 AM
3 votes:
Yes, that's exactly what we want. Now, take off your top.
2013-04-22 08:07:29 AM
3 votes:
"my car is screwing up again and the problem is in the charging system"

most guys would give a howto reply on car repairs and say what mechanic they like
most gals will give sympathy and comfort and remember you have that big job interview coming up, the wedding, and that the pos old bf said it was a good car.
2013-04-22 08:02:17 AM
3 votes:

Martian_Astronomer: I get the feeling she was orbiting around a point, (or orbiting around a cluster of points in one of those mind-bending n-body trajectory problems that has to be solved numerically,) but never actually getting around to mentioning what that point was.


And it was written by a woman?  I am SHOCKED!
2013-04-22 07:54:36 AM
3 votes:

skinink: Has this subject already been covered in every monthly issue of Cosmopolitan Magazine?


I think there was a quiz to determine if you're man is an appliance, a predator, or a child.
2013-04-22 07:27:02 AM
3 votes:
Certainly, a relationship is a place where you can articulate your needs, and afford your partner the opportunity to twist that which you clearly stated into her own twenty-step multi-hole vision of what she can best offer you.
2013-04-22 07:25:41 AM
3 votes:
JEZEBEL?  And it was nonsense?  That never happens.
2013-04-22 07:25:19 AM
3 votes:
1. Show up naked.
2. Bring beer.
2013-04-22 04:35:21 PM
2 votes:

Z1P2: Uchiha_Cycliste: Sid_6.7: teto85: 25.media.tumblr.com

You're reading what passes as "feminist critique" among the more modern and less intellectually interested "feminists".

Unlike the feminist of yore, which might have actually had many fine and insightful points to make about how society tends to emphasize and favor the "masculine" over the "feminine" (no, really, guy here, and a lot of feminism is interesting philosophically!), this author, like many of her ilk, have been reduced to complaining about men complaining.

Which, really, is about the opposite of feminism. Hey, lady, how about you stop obsessing over what men say and do, and forge your own place in the world? Yeah, didn't think so, that would be too hard, wouldn't it?

And she's really trying to be funny, but managing to come off as even less funny and more pissy than most conservative "comedians".

Sad.

/and that's what you're reading!

\when did feminism stop being about equality?
\\equality is what I still look to create and what my GF and I are all about.

Feminism stopped being about equality back in the 1990's. If you still only want equality, then you're a racist, extremist hardcore conservative douchebag. How dare you think that men should have the same opportunities as women! Don't you know that's racist?!


IT would be so hard not to break out into hysterical laughter when confronted with someone like that in real life.

On a sort of related note... I once got a free pitcher of beer from my campus pub by going over to the food court and ordering a couple terriyaki chicken skewers and eating them while I meandered over to a pro-vegan Peta booth and asking out the girl manning the booth. She was less than amused. The bartenders at the Bear's lair were more so. =D
2013-04-22 02:01:37 PM
2 votes:
As a person with a penis, I'm really getting a kick out of these replies
2013-04-22 01:05:49 PM
2 votes:

WhippingBoy: Imagine what would happen if one day, all of a sudden, men stopped putting up with all of this shiat.


I guess the world would either turn into an episode of "Father Knows Best" or into a Village People video. I don't know which, but I'm not sure if I want to find out.
2013-04-22 12:41:39 PM
2 votes:

Owangotang: I get told ALL the time I'm supposed to listen to nonsensical ranting without giving the slightest hint of offering a solution.

fark that.


You don't have to listen to the content. Just the most vauge overaching concept.

See, When they rant like that you can exhaust them by saying nothing more then "uh-huh" "yup, I agree" and " That's terrible!" at the right moments

You only have to listen hard enough that you can put each of those 3 statements in the correct verbal pauses. It's not hard.

The trick is if they start to suspect you're doing it, they'll ask you a question. If one of their sentences ends with an upward inflection and you can't give the proper "I agree with what you've been talking about", you're farked.
2013-04-22 11:52:28 AM
2 votes:

Uchiha_Cycliste: Anyways, I stand by me and my girlfriend... equality.
Interestingly, we came to our equality views independently which I think is a really important thing.. it meant I wasn't just proclaiming similar ideas because I wanted to be closer to her. There are many views, ideas and feelings that I have co-opted from her, and likewise her from me. But this one; we both realized early on both that it was an important idea and it was something worth trying our damndest to reinforce.
while we've only been dating for a year, I've been asking her out for 15 years and we've been best friends for 25 =3


global3.memecdn.com
2013-04-22 11:52:13 AM
2 votes:

fluffy2097: Dion Fortune: I've realized that the way to react to "feminist" derp like this is just to not engage with it.  Deep down it's a cry for attention (and page views).

I like to rape it out of the broads, then punch em in the stomach to keep her from being pregnant.

When a woman cries, I slap her repeatedly and tell her top stop with her hysterics, and tell her "one of these days. POW! ZOOM! Straight to the moon!"

Once you've driven a women to a broken, quivering pile of human garbage, you'll finally get your blowjob!


So, you've read Stephen R. Donaldson's The Gap into Vision series.
2013-04-22 10:10:09 AM
2 votes:
i.imgur.com

I keed, I keed
2013-04-22 09:59:53 AM
2 votes:

hubiestubert: Stage Left


Tracy just contacted me regarding this comment. Her: "I don't think a man has any reason nor right to tell me which side of the stage to exit! Fight the Patriarchy!"
2013-04-22 09:23:40 AM
2 votes:
I got about 2 paragraphs into that and figured she is not someone with whom I'd like to spend time.  She's probably still talking, too.
2013-04-22 09:17:34 AM
2 votes:
For the women who complain that men don't listen to them or care about their internal feelings ... Please don't be surprised. Many of the traits that you want from men - the traits that get them laid - are the traits that require detachment and callousness. Get your fourteen year old daughters to cherish being sensitive, patient and caring. Get them to invest their dating and romantic lives and their first sexual encounters to the squeamish, uncertain, uncomfortable boy with zits and glasses in preference to the early-peaking captain of the football team who wins status by dominating others uncaringly.

Most men ape - and then become - thesebecause they see that it's a route to the main form of success that even beta males aspire to - sex. Once a supply of sex is secure, men - especially young men - can grow immensely. Without it- without the approval and support of one lover - growth is tremendously difficult, and basically is composed of lurching from pretended behavior to pretended behavior.

As a young man, this is part of the reason that "just be yourself" was vexing. "just myself" clearly wasn't getting laid or accepted. Why the hell would I want to be that loser? Hey, you know what works? Calling girls biatches and beating up those weaker than myself!
2013-04-22 09:16:30 AM
2 votes:
Jezebel Rebuttal Template: 1) Ask the most important question in any article that seeks to explain men: "What about *us*?"
2) Mock a man for trying to speak for men.
3) Speak for men.
2013-04-22 08:52:10 AM
2 votes:

WhippingBoy: The more I read Jezebel, the more I'm convinced that it's actually an MRA site used to discredit legitimate feminism by associating "feminism" with utter and complete drivel.

Either that, or it answers the question "What *can* you do with a degree in Gender Studies AND have a below-average intelligence"?


False-Flag Feminazis?
2013-04-22 08:50:13 AM
2 votes:
What men don't want in a relationship?

Jezebel authors/commenters.
2013-04-22 08:37:42 AM
2 votes:

crab66: ko_kyi: I am happy to deal with life's stresses together.

I am unhappy to deal with constantly manufactured stresses that could have been avoided with a tiny bit of thought, consideration, etc.

Reminds me of my sister. How her husband puts up with that crap....I will never know.


The pussy is really really good
2013-04-22 08:30:56 AM
2 votes:
That was like trying to read another wizard's spell book, where you just get more confused and crazy the more you read. Perhaps that's what happened to the authors over at Jezebel.
2013-04-22 08:29:11 AM
2 votes:

INeedAName: In December my wife has a chance to South Africa for 2 weeks. She asked me if I wanted to tag along. I'm leaning towards no.

It's not that I don't love her, or want her around... but holy farking hell, some mother farking peace and quiet?!

I used to think I wanted to feel needed. Im tired of being needed. Being needed wears me the fark out!


Mine is in Isreal with her mom right now. Its pure heaven. Its quiet when I want quiet, the beer flows like water, porn is on the computer at all times, the only acceptable food is fried food....
2013-04-22 08:23:40 AM
2 votes:

doglover: SDRR: AdrienVeidt: We'll, im convinced. Time to lop off my cock so I can be a better person. Who's with me, boys?

Sorry, pal, you're on your own with that one.

Now now, don't be hasty.

I will also lop off AdrienVeidt's cock if it will make me a better person.


There's plenty for everybody!
2013-04-22 08:16:01 AM
2 votes:
Advice to young men: The most spoiled and privileged women in the world are also the most whiney and entitled. Before you settle down, visit some other countries and meet a few whose factory default isn't "alimony bomb looking for a place to go off".
2013-04-22 08:11:26 AM
2 votes:
There is a distinct lack of sammiches and beer and I expect you farkettes to fix this sooner rather than later
2013-04-22 08:03:24 AM
2 votes:

thisispete: I'll try some pop-psychology.

I think it's to do with the top two tiers of Maslow's hierarchy of needs. The need for esteem and the need for self actualization. Esteem, in terms of a romantic relationship, is a feeling of being worthy of the relationship. Not a feeling that your partner is out of your league and you're lucky to have her, but belief that all your characteristics - and even your flaws - are compatible with the person you're with. If you feel the need to put up a facade at home, then you haven't really achieved the esteem you would hope to have. Building on the esteem you've achieved feeds is self-actualization - a true assessment of your own worth and living up to your full potential. Women be shoppin.

2013-04-22 07:58:59 AM
2 votes:
We'll, im convinced. Time to lop off my cock so I can be a better person. Who's with me, boys?
2013-04-22 07:55:51 AM
2 votes:
Men want to do whatever the f*ck they want to do, most of which includes shooting and harassing people on Xbox Live and none of which includes listening to a woman talk.
2013-04-22 07:50:31 AM
2 votes:
In December my wife has a chance to South Africa for 2 weeks. She asked me if I wanted to tag along. I'm leaning towards no.

It's not that I don't love her, or want her around... but holy farking hell, some mother farking peace and quiet?!

I used to think I wanted to feel needed. Im tired of being needed. Being needed wears me the fark out!
2013-04-22 07:48:57 AM
2 votes:

untaken_name: Oh, Lezzyhell. What would life be without you?

/no seriously, I'd like to find out.


I was seriously contemplating calling it jizzybelch, but then i thought it might cross some line some where...
2013-04-22 07:47:47 AM
2 votes:

dittybopper: darkjezter: Dafuq did I just read?

Just nod your head, say "Yes, Honey" and "Uh-huh" at appropriate times while just mostly tuning it out, because life is too short to listen to that shiat all the time, and life is too short to say "life is to short to listen to that shiat all the time".  So just act like you care that some random person didn't say exactly the right at the right time to your wife, constituting a World-shattering snub of *EPIC* proportions that is the worst thing *EVAR*, until of course the next minor thing that straight men would totally ignore happens and supersedes it in importance.


Don't forget to follow up with  "Told you that biatch was crazy" when she starts going off about how that some female competition at her work is "trying to DESTROY" her...
2013-04-22 07:47:37 AM
2 votes:
Oh, Lezzyhell. What would life be without you?

/no seriously, I'd like to find out.
2013-04-22 07:24:32 AM
2 votes:
We have an "Unlikely" tag for a reason, people...
2013-04-22 07:23:59 AM
2 votes:
Jezebel's goal is to be more damaging that the 25 magazine titles devoted to farking up women which are clustered around most every check-out at most every supermarket.

-- waiting for J to have a weekly Castration Tool give-away contest for their truly devoted
2013-04-23 08:30:50 AM
1 votes:

Frederick: The thought of dying alone effects people; but they dont realize it until they get much older.


If dying alone effected people, the person dying wouldn't be alone anymore...
2013-04-22 09:45:55 PM
1 votes:

dragonchild: JesusJuice: Besides, most college-aged lesbians fall into the "convenience/piss off parents" camp rather than the "can't find a man camp."

Maybe, but who a person decides to sleep with is none of your goddamn business, let alone why.


i0.kym-cdn.com
2013-04-22 04:43:01 PM
1 votes:

FrancoFile: Actually, replace "man" with "introvert" in those quotes, and the guy is spot-on.


You're right.

Apparently, he had some sort of freak study where he managed to get only introverted men to participate.
2013-04-22 04:41:05 PM
1 votes:
It's weird that Jezebel gives advice about coping with men in relationships when the bulk of their readers don't get into relationships with men.

It's kind of like if a 1993 issue of Nintendo Power printed an article about the best way to get the most out of your Sega Genesis.
2013-04-22 03:19:34 PM
1 votes:

PsiChick: Quinsisdos: PsiChick: How the fark do you not know what 'sarcasm' is and that the writer is, in fact,  mocking the point of view they are pretending to emulate?

In his defence, it is Jezebel we're talking about here.

Does Jezebel have some sort of reading-comprehension-fail link? Because I think I clicked a different one than most of the thread. I actually understood it was sarcastic, to start with.


No offense, but you've proven time and time again that you're not the sharpest tool in the shed...
2013-04-22 03:01:26 PM
1 votes:
I used to work 12 and 14 hour days. Sometimes I worked a second job between 1 am and 6 am and then had to be at my main job by 8:00 am.

I was always driving. Frequently I had to contend with idiot bosses and sullen employees. Most of the time I was dead tired.

My g/f had problems with my not being able to see her all the time or not picking up on little cues she'd drop. Yet, she knew I worked a lot when she met me.

She used to pull all sorts of things to get my attention -- and make me jealous. It drove me insane. I'd get called up at midnight when she was drunk and crying and threatening suicide and go over and settle things down. Then her ex-boyfriend was starting to hang around. She couldn't pay her rent. Her and her lady buddies would go out and party periodically during the week. Someone was stalking her and I'd have to get up, drive over to her place and prowl the neighborhood. She was broke and needed money. She was sick and needed money.
Women have this nearly magical way of changing their appearances so that they can go from cute to nearly ethereal. I found it fascinating when she'd show up.

I listened to her problems, complaints and opinions and solved what I could when all I wanted to do was get some much needed sleep. If I got sick, she'd vanish. None of that caring coddling she used to tell me she did for her last B/F.

In bed she was great. Her actions went a long way to recharge my batteries and her beauty in the soft lights was spectacular.

However, it eventually reached the point that I was getting exhausted trying to work and handle her problems and attention getting plays at the same time.

BTW. She couldn't cook worth a hoot. I used to cook professionally, so I did most of the cooking for us when we ate together.

You kind of get the hint when you're chatting with her after a round of amazing sex, about problems affecting you, and her eyes go out of focus, her face goes somewhat slack but she becomes all animated and attentive when you talk about her good points.

So the article isn't exactly true. Guys will walk through hell for a woman they care about and there are many women out there who just don't want to KNOW that much about their guy -- just so long as he keeps flattering her ego, stays healthy and throws a lot of money her way.
2013-04-22 02:12:51 PM
1 votes:

namatad: dustygrimp: Current biggest pet peeve with regard to communication is that I hate getting answers to questions I haven't asked.

Me: What do you want for dinner?
Her: If you want to make that chicken we bought the other day I can find something else.
Me: Ok.  What do you want for dinner?
Her: It doesn't matter.  You can have the chicken.

Please, just answer the question I asked, not the question you think I am asking.

hahahaha
me: where do you want to go for dinner
her: I dont care, you pick
me: mexican it is
her 10 years later: oh my god you always made me go to that mexican place
me: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU


her:  find some recipes so we can go to the grocery store
me:  (looks in cookbooks for 15 minutes, comes up with 5 choice recipes) ok wife, these 5 recipes look good, I was thinking about going with a, b and c
her: I don't like any of those

weeks later

her: want to pick out some recipes before we go to the grocery store?
me: sure thing, these recipes (d, f, g) look good
her: I don't want those

weeks later

her: going to the grocery store, let's find some recipes
me: every time I spend 15 minutes finding recipes you decide that you don't like my choices, so I have no ideas for recipes
her: you're so indecisive

___________________________

her:  where do you want to go out and eat at?
me: I'd like some thai food
her: no I don't want that
me: ok what about mediterranean?
her: not that either
we finally settle on something (no clue how)

weeks or months later
her:  where do you want to go out to eat?
me: I don't care, you can decide
her: why are you always so indecisive?
me: because you ask me what I want, and then don't like what I decide...(in the dog house for a couple days)

cdn2.planetminecraft.com
2013-04-22 02:12:09 PM
1 votes:
I just read the craziest article. It was so crazy, that half of it was quotes and context from some other crazy article. I feel dumber squared from having read that.

/dumber^2?
2013-04-22 01:41:34 PM
1 votes:

fluffy2097: Owangotang: I get told ALL the time I'm supposed to listen to nonsensical ranting without giving the slightest hint of offering a solution.

fark that.

You don't have to listen to the content. Just the most vauge overaching concept.

See, When they rant like that you can exhaust them by saying nothing more then "uh-huh" "yup, I agree" and " That's terrible!" at the right moments

You only have to listen hard enough that you can put each of those 3 statements in the correct verbal pauses. It's not hard.

The trick is if they start to suspect you're doing it, they'll ask you a question. If one of their sentences ends with an upward inflection and you can't give the proper "I agree with what you've been talking about", you're farked.


Oh yea, I think that whole routine is now inborn with males. Seriously, we all think of evolution as losing tails or growing beaks or some shiat but some day in the future an anthropologist will say, "...and this is when male homo sapiens began displaying signs of an instinctive ability to listen to the tone of a woman's speech and not the actual content."

Of course, women responded shortly afterwards by ranting in IM, email, and text form.
2013-04-22 01:26:13 PM
1 votes:
On a less aggro note, here's how I deal with the end-of-the-day situation unless I am actually in genuine hysterics or something, which really doesn't happen very often.

Given that:

1. I know we're both tired and cranky and just want to relax.
2. I know we both probably have something we want to talk about.
3. I know I will probably talk more than he will.
4. I know he'll have a hard time listening while he's stewing about his own stuff.
5. I know I'm pretty good at taking a deep breath and setting things aside for a while.

I ask him to put on some music, because I know he's proud of his record collection and will choose something we both enjoy. I get us both something to drink, because I don't mind doing it and he needs time to choose a record. I settle down on the couch with him and get comfy.

I ask him how his day was, and I actually listen and respond appropriately. This gives me time to cool down while I focus on something other than what's got me pissed off, so I won't just go off like a madwoman. I give him a hug if he needs one. I tell him how awesome he is if he did something he's proud of. Everybody likes compliments, and I actually do think he's awesome, so that works out pretty well.

When he's done talking, he asks about my day, and I tell him. He actually listens, and responds appropriately. He gives me a hug if I need one. He tells me how awesome I am, whether I was awesome that day or not, because he's always showering me with compliments -- actually I kind of wish he'd do a little less of it, but I'm hardly going to complain about getting too many compliments.

Once we've had some snuggle time and gotten the day out of our systems, we talk about what we want to do for the evening.

Yes, I know this sounds very Ward and June Cleaver, which is pretty hilarious, really, considering I'm one of the least girly-girls you'll ever meet. And no, I don't do it that way because I feel like I have to, or because I think men should come first, or for any of the reasons you're thinking.  I do it because I have thought about what we both want at the end of the day, and I have applied common sense to determine the most efficient way for both of us to get what we want.

Sometimes the "traditional" way things are done is traditional for a good reason. Then again, we're all different. YMMV. You'll have to figure out for yourself what works for you.
2013-04-22 12:56:52 PM
1 votes:
Back to the Loch with you, Nessie!
2013-04-22 12:31:57 PM
1 votes:

Oblio13: Advice to young men: The most spoiled and privileged women in the world are also the most whiney and entitled. Before you settle down, visit some other countries and meet a few whose factory default isn't "alimony bomb looking for a place to go off".


This is advice I wish I had as a young man...

Tips : Thailand, Brazil, Spain, Greece.

The first two for what you are looking for and the last two to see what that lovely young pretty thing you just met will look like in 20 years (spain not good, greece kill it with fire)...
2013-04-22 12:31:38 PM
1 votes:
biatch I'm not a predator I am a bunny. I like farking, eating, and being left alone, but most of all? Silence.
2013-04-22 12:28:26 PM
1 votes:

Doak: Fausts Fist: Brilliant piece.

Reading through the bullshiat I'm almost sure Tracy Moore has never had a long-term relationship or a job with more than 30 hours work per week.
Tracy Moore is married and has children. But kudos on your awesome assumptions, bro!


I don't think white knighting her on Fark is going to win her away from her family, bro!
2013-04-22 12:24:48 PM
1 votes:

Fausts Fist: Brilliant piece.

Reading through the bullshiat I'm almost sure Tracy Moore has never had a long-term relationship or a job with more than 30 hours work per week.

Tracy Moore is married and has children. But kudos on your awesome assumptions, bro!
2013-04-22 12:23:31 PM
1 votes:

dustygrimp: Current biggest pet peeve with regard to communication is that I hate getting answers to questions I haven't asked.

Me: What do you want for dinner?
Her: If you want to make that chicken we bought the other day I can find something else.
Me: Ok.  What do you want for dinner?
Her: It doesn't matter.  You can have the chicken.

Please, just answer the question I asked, not the question you think I am asking.


I have already decided I want something other than the chicken we just bought.
But I don't want to waste the chicken.  You eat that.  I will have what I want.
2013-04-22 12:11:48 PM
1 votes:
What an insulting piece of crap.  biatch should get a coont punch.
2013-04-22 12:06:56 PM
1 votes:

namatad: dustygrimp: Current biggest pet peeve with regard to communication is that I hate getting answers to questions I haven't asked.

Me: What do you want for dinner?
Her: If you want to make that chicken we bought the other day I can find something else.
Me: Ok.  What do you want for dinner?
Her: It doesn't matter.  You can have the chicken.

Please, just answer the question I asked, not the question you think I am asking.

hahahaha
me: where do you want to go for dinner
her: I dont care, you pick
me: mexican it is
her 10 years later: oh my god you always made me go to that mexican place
me: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU


HAHAAAA that's what we use our kids for now:

Before kids:
me: What do you want for dinner
her: I don't know, what do YOU want
me: Well i know what i DON'T want
her: Which is
me: [insert what i had for lunch that day]
her: ok, well, then what do you want
me: i seriously don't care as long as it's not [lunch]
her: me either
me: how about [food]
her: nah, i'm not really in the mood for that
me: I thought you didn't care
her: I didn't, but now [food] doesn't sound good
... continue this for 1/2 hour

now:
me: what do you want for dinner
her: I don't know, what do you want?
me: not [Lunch]
her: hey [kid's name], what do you want for dinner?
kid: [insert kid favorite here]
us: no! how about [food]
kid: ok fine
her: [food] sounds good!

As long as i don't make the first suggestion, i end up picking what we eat, without argument, because letting the kids choose pizza or macaroni and cheese every night of the week would be horrible
2013-04-22 11:55:39 AM
1 votes:

dustygrimp: Current biggest pet peeve with regard to communication is that I hate getting answers to questions I haven't asked.

Me: What do you want for dinner?
Her: If you want to make that chicken we bought the other day I can find something else.
Me: Ok.  What do you want for dinner?
Her: It doesn't matter.  You can have the chicken.

Please, just answer the question I asked, not the question you think I am asking.


hahahaha
me: where do you want to go for dinner
her: I dont care, you pick
me: mexican it is
her 10 years later: oh my god you always made me go to that mexican place
me: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
2013-04-22 11:45:33 AM
1 votes:

SpectroBoy: [i.chzbgr.com image 450x548]


i.chzbgr.com
The only thing I could think was "Holy hell, there is no way they could eat all that food in the 2-5 days it will take that food to go bad".
2013-04-22 11:31:06 AM
1 votes:
Now that's my kind of nonsense: nonsense about nonsense.
2013-04-22 11:22:30 AM
1 votes:
i.chzbgr.com
2013-04-22 11:19:18 AM
1 votes:

culebra: The author of this article and the author of the piece to which she is referring both sound like insufferable idiots. And those comments: holy fark.


FARK YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
You made me go back and read those comments. Now my brain is REALLY broken.
2013-04-22 11:10:45 AM
1 votes:

CeroX: What Men Want? It's different for each man, take the time and figure your man out, but use direct communication using language that means what you say, and not passive aggressive nonsense or cryptic terms with double meanings or deep philosophical undertones. Also, we don't want you being upset because the answer if less than 5 words. Our answers aren't passive aggressive nonsense or cryptic terms with double meanings or deep philosophical undertones.


And for gods sake, if you need to decompress by chatting with me, I am fine with that. Please don't disguise it as needing my opinion on something. IF you ask my opinion, and you really just want me to nod and say "that person who did something mildly objectionable is a total biatch"  I will come up with a solution for you, which will involve a rational conversation with the person you're upset over, and then you'll be even more mad at me.


And If I'm asking you a question ANSWER THE farkING QUESTION FIRST.  I did not ask for a story about how your coworkers uncles friends cousins former roomate once asked a similar question and he had cancer of the nutsack and my uncle was such a wonderful man who... what was the question?
2013-04-22 10:55:38 AM
1 votes:
I just ran upstairs to grab a cup of coffee and got railroaded into a one-sided "discussion" about whether or not my wife should wear socks today (I wish I was kidding). Apparently, "what the fark do I care" means that I'm an insensitive jerk.
2013-04-22 10:51:24 AM
1 votes:
/Patriarchy
2013-04-22 10:45:56 AM
1 votes:
doglover: Women be shoppin.

img96.imageshack.us
2013-04-22 10:45:51 AM
1 votes:

LibertyHiller: because I care: My girlfriend flat-out told me she does everything she can to please me because when I'm happy and satisfied I'll do anything she tells me to.

She doesn't understand why so many Western women don't get that.

Ladies, this is how you pussy-whip. Take notes.


Wait til he marries her...ha ha ha
2013-04-22 10:42:55 AM
1 votes:

WhippingBoy: quickdraw: mike_d85: Um... Where's the real article? It sounds spot on.

/shut up for 5 minutes when I walk in the door please

If you don't want someone who talks get a dog.

Whoa. Did you just say that? Are you serious??? Five minutes is too much for you to wait??? You are the weakest link. I feel sorry for the pussy-whipped delta man that ends up with you


Perhaps she is the one who needs the dog.  That way she can yap at the poor thing infinitely without getting any of that infuriating conversational response.  Then again, this could be considered animal cruelty.  I would imagine that after a week or so the poor animal would break into her Godiva stash and commit suicide by chocolate.
2013-04-22 10:36:14 AM
1 votes:

Dion Fortune: I've realized that the way to react to "feminist" derp like this is just to not engage with it.  Deep down it's a cry for attention (and page views).


Isn't the correct term "femsplaining"?
2013-04-22 10:34:13 AM
1 votes:

quickdraw: mike_d85: Um... Where's the real article? It sounds spot on.

/shut up for 5 minutes when I walk in the door please

If you don't want someone who talks get a dog.


Whoa. Did you just say that? Are you serious??? Five minutes is too much for you to wait??? You are the weakest link. I feel sorry for the pussy-whipped delta man that ends up with you
2013-04-22 10:29:26 AM
1 votes:

Dafatone: Raaaaarrrgh, Jezebel!!!

I swear, if this were posted on some other site, most of the focus would be on how lame the guy she's talking about is.


Oh no worries, he's an idiot too. There's plenty of room for everyone involved in the linked story to be a fracking moron.
2013-04-22 10:00:52 AM
1 votes:

Nana's Vibrator: Do you think she'd mind if I sent her a penis collage?


I bet she would thank you for it.
2013-04-22 09:52:48 AM
1 votes:

CapeFearCadaver: Step 3. Find The Predator's cord.And snip that biatch. Make him yours! Of course you'll now have an eunuch, but what the hell, he's got plenty of CHILL time now!


guyism.com
2013-04-22 09:46:58 AM
1 votes:
Jezebel. Because blogs have to post...SOMEthing.
2013-04-22 09:25:41 AM
1 votes:

rubi_con_man: For the women who complain that men don't listen to them or care about their internal feelings ... Please don't be surprised. Many of the traits that you want from men - the traits that get them laid - are the traits that require detachment and callousness. Get your fourteen year old daughters to cherish being sensitive, patient and caring. Get them to invest their dating and romantic lives and their first sexual encounters to the squeamish, uncertain, uncomfortable boy with zits and glasses in preference to the early-peaking captain of the football team who wins status by dominating others uncaringly.

Most men ape - and then become - thesebecause they see that it's a route to the main form of success that even beta males aspire to - sex. Once a supply of sex is secure, men - especially young men - can grow immensely. Without it- without the approval and support of one lover - growth is tremendously difficult, and basically is composed of lurching from pretended behavior to pretended behavior.

As a young man, this is part of the reason that "just be yourself" was vexing. "just myself" clearly wasn't getting laid or accepted. Why the hell would I want to be that loser? Hey, you know what works? Calling girls biatches and beating up those weaker than myself!


This, so much this.
2013-04-22 09:10:49 AM
1 votes:

WhippingBoy: Imagine what would happen if one day, all of a sudden, men stopped putting up with all of this shiat.


A universe-wide epidemic of blue balls?
2013-04-22 09:08:57 AM
1 votes:

doubled99: One of the worst examples of writing ever. No idea what the point is.


"Men bad"
2013-04-22 09:03:49 AM
1 votes:

quickdraw: Incontinent_dog_and_monkey_rodeo: Women and gay men tend to want more drama in their lives.  Straight men want less.

pffft whatever. I know plenty of very het guys that are freaking drama machines. The biggest gossips I know are straight guys as well. It's just when they do it they call it "having a beer."


The difference is whether they observe the sacred maxim or not: don't start no shiat, won't be no shiat.
2013-04-22 08:59:06 AM
1 votes:

Incontinent_dog_and_monkey_rodeo: Women and gay men tend to want more drama in their lives.  Straight men want less.


pffft whatever. I know plenty of very het guys that are freaking drama machines. The biggest gossips I know are straight guys as well. It's just when they do it they call it "having a beer."
2013-04-22 08:56:02 AM
1 votes:

comslave: Jezebel appears to be engaged in a project to absolutely end all relationships between men and women.


It's that homosexual agenda you've heard so much about.
2013-04-22 08:52:07 AM
1 votes:
I like what Chris Rock said about men:
"Men want 3 things:  Food, sex & silence.  Feed me.  Fark me.  Shut the Fark up."
Yes ladies, men really are that simple.
2013-04-22 08:46:52 AM
1 votes:
The more I read Jezebel, the more I'm convinced that it's actually an MRA site used to discredit legitimate feminism by associating "feminism" with utter and complete drivel.

Either that, or it answers the question "What *can* you do with a degree in Gender Studies AND have a below-average intelligence"?
2013-04-22 08:38:10 AM
1 votes:
I learned early on with women that you can be right, or you can be happy. Not both.
2013-04-22 08:35:27 AM
1 votes:
So I made the mistake of looking in the comments.  Wow.  What a bunch of whacknoodles.  I see them all getting together for chocolatinis and biatching about how they can't find a good man but that dumb slut Jenny always get the good ones, but they just like her cuz she likes to fark and cook.
2013-04-22 08:07:36 AM
1 votes:
re: TFA,  Um, NO

/28 years of Um, NO experience
2013-04-22 08:05:44 AM
1 votes:

foo monkey: miss diminutive: That article was a colossal clusterfark of stupid. Plus, it wasn't funny.

How about we just call a truce in the whole battle of the sexes thing? Yeah, I'm sure at various times each sex has had it worse, and the other has gotten off easier (heh), but in the context of relationships, it's not relevant. Genuine relationships boil down to the interactions and choices between two individuals, not their allegiance to a specific gender. This whole attempt to generalize both sides and shoehorn them into fitting into some specific narrative simply abrogates the responsibilities and consequences that arise from people's own actions and decisions. Or whatever.

It's not a battle. It's teamwork. The shrink cited in the blog gets that. The blogger doesn't.


This. Anyone who still sees the individual genders are inherently adversarial has obviously been either dating the wrong people or has unrealistic ideas about the dynamics of a healthy relationship.

Or she's just a biatch.
2013-04-22 08:04:00 AM
1 votes:
She sounds single.
2013-04-22 07:59:21 AM
1 votes:

PunGent: We have an "Unlikely" tag for a reason, people...


WE have the jezebel tag too which suffciently indecates "Toot! toot! the SS Jezebel has returnded to it's berth, prepare for painful unreality if an intelligent man (the enemy)"
2013-04-22 07:55:45 AM
1 votes:

CeroX: Don't forget to follow up with "Told you that biatch was crazy" when she starts going off about how that some female competition at her work is "trying to DESTROY" her...


What the fark are you talking about? You wrap up bags at J.C. Penney's! What's she doing, ripping up your paper?
2013-04-22 07:49:33 AM
1 votes:
To give her credit, she got a few of them right.

Step 1. STFU
Step 2. Fix him a sammich, and bring beer with it.

Step 3. Find The Predator's cord. If you can't find his cord right away, look for a part of his body that most likely resembles an extension or a cord-like - oh.
Step 4: Take his cord and gently tug on it until it's long enough to plug into the recharger.
Step 5.
(The recharger is your mouth and
Step 6. Kidding! It's your vagina and
Step 7. Fine, it's both.
Step 8. Duh, you have other holes, too, dummy-kins )
Step 5: Profit!


FTFY
2013-04-22 07:42:56 AM
1 votes:
My brain hurts. What the hell did I just try to read?
2013-04-22 07:42:56 AM
1 votes:
I get the feeling she was orbiting around a point, (or orbiting around a cluster of points in one of those mind-bending n-body trajectory problems that has to be solved numerically,) but never actually getting around to mentioning what that point was. The article that she's critiquing sounds like it may have had some flaws: It's a generalization of one man's desires to all men, it's vague on specifics, and it describes "a man's" ideal support structure in terms of what a woman can do for him, the natural give-and-take of a relationship notwithstanding.

If done better, this might have been a good platform to discuss how every relationship is different and so is what the members want out of said relationship. It might have been a place to discuss mutual needs and how to place one person's needs equally to the other's, or to prioritize when one person really needs it. It might have been a legitimate forum from which to criticize the original author's view of gender roles, or to question whether or not he cares about the person providing his "safe place to recharge."

Instead, the only conclusion I heard was that if a man feels like a wound-up predator when he comes home and doesn't want to immediately engage emotionally without winding down first, he's stupid and you should date his brother. That's not really feminist critique, that's just inarticulate.

/ I don't hate feminism, but I do tend to hate internet arguments about it.
// Fark, on the other hand, loves any argument that drives clicks
2013-04-22 07:37:09 AM
1 votes:

darkjezter: Dafuq did I just read?


Just nod your head, say "Yes, Honey" and "Uh-huh" at appropriate times while just mostly tuning it out, because life is too short to listen to that shiat all the time, and life is too short to say "life is to short to listen to that shiat all the time".  So just act like you care that some random person didn't say exactly the right at the right time to your wife, constituting a World-shattering snub of *EPIC* proportions that is the worst thing *EVAR*, until of course the next minor thing that straight men would totally ignore happens and supersedes it in importance.
2013-04-22 07:34:18 AM
1 votes:
Ok... so in reality, this idiot has written a counter piece to a story that apparently claims men's needs are simple, that all they want is a warm fleshy teddy bear that they can f- whenever and doesn't complain when they f- other fleshy teddy bears when he feels like. And I believe she is trying to say men are more complicated than that... but then decides to inject her own thought on what men want, which is even dumber than the article she is pissed about...

Sounds like this "journalist" doesn't like a male telling her what she should think about what men want... or some shiat...

Here's some advice Tracy Moore > How's about you stop caring what "all men want" and worry about what YOU want... Which by her 20 steps, is apparently a Eunuch...
2013-04-22 07:27:45 AM
1 votes:
You know what really recharges our batteries?  Not having to listen to women like "Tracy" (TFA) prattle on and on about how good men have it compared to women.

The article it's based on has it exactly right.  Tracy might be happier with the state of her relationships if she could shut up and make sammiches once in a while when her man gets home.

/Just kidding
//Sort of
2013-04-22 02:58:29 AM
1 votes:
Step 1. Imagine your boyfriend is The Predator

I was thinking Terminator. "I'll be back" simply means "I came".

/stupid article
2013-04-22 02:34:21 AM
1 votes:

Sid_6.7: teto85: 25.media.tumblr.com

You're reading what passes as "feminist critique" among the more modern and less intellectually interested "feminists".

Unlike the feminist of yore, which might have actually had many fine and insightful points to make about how society tends to emphasize and favor the "masculine" over the "feminine" (no, really, guy here, and a lot of feminism is interesting philosophically!), this author, like many of her ilk, have been reduced to complaining about men complaining.

Which, really, is about the opposite of feminism. Hey, lady, how about you stop obsessing over what men say and do, and forge your own place in the world? Yeah, didn't think so, that would be too hard, wouldn't it?

And she's really trying to be funny, but managing to come off as even less funny and more pissy than most conservative "comedians".

Sad.

/and that's what you're reading!


i426.photobucket.com

\when did feminism stop being about equality?
\\equality is what I still look to create and what my GF and I are all about.
 
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