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(Jezebel)   What men want from a relationship is not a place to recharge, nor feel secure, nor where we can be ourselves but a growth experience where the man listens to a woman's every thought and worry and figures out what her facial expression means   (jezebel.com) divider line 377
    More: Followup, interpersonal relationship, economic growths  
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12385 clicks; posted to Main » on 22 Apr 2013 at 7:16 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-04-22 11:19:18 AM

culebra: The author of this article and the author of the piece to which she is referring both sound like insufferable idiots. And those comments: holy fark.


FARK YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
You made me go back and read those comments. Now my brain is REALLY broken.
 
2013-04-22 11:21:19 AM

CeroX: What Men Want? It's different for each man, take the time and figure your man out, but use direct communication using language that means what you say, and not passive aggressive nonsense or cryptic terms with double meanings or deep philosophical undertones. Also, we don't want you being upset because the answer if less than 5 words. Our answers aren't passive aggressive nonsense or cryptic terms with double meanings or deep philosophical undertones.


Protip: if you go around making general statements about women that suggest that everything we say is "passive aggressive nonsense or cryptic terms with double meanings or deep philisophical undertones," you are going to come off looking like you don't like women very much.

/I actually like men, I do say what I mean, and I do take the trouble to figure a man out. However, I expect him to extend the same courtesy to me; dismissing women as "impossible to understand" is a cop-out. Of course, such men can always settle for that passive-aggressive nonsense, but it gets awfully boring listening to you complain about it.
 
2013-04-22 11:22:30 AM
i.chzbgr.com
 
2013-04-22 11:22:34 AM

WhippingBoy: I just ran upstairs to grab a cup of coffee and got railroaded into a one-sided "discussion" about whether or not my wife should wear socks today (I wish I was kidding). Apparently, "what the fark do I care" means that I'm an insensitive jerk.


Well you ARE an insensitive jerk. Sheesh. Try acknowledging her feelings for a change. Like this:
"It sounds like you're worried about whether to wear socks today or not. I think you should wear what makes you feel comfortable. In the meantime, anytime you start to stress over something trivial and get the urge to talk about it, feel free to put my dick in your mouth instead. It will make you feel better. Everything will be alright."
 
2013-04-22 11:22:45 AM

CeroX: What Men Want? It's different for each man, take the time and figure your man out, but use direct communication using language that means what you say, and not passive aggressive nonsense or cryptic terms with double meanings or deep philosophical undertones. Also, we don't want you being upset because the answer if less than 5 words. Our answers aren't passive aggressive nonsense or cryptic terms with double meanings or deep philosophical undertones.


NO
men are not different
we all want THIS !!!!!

and if you could bring us a beer, that would be awesome
 
2013-04-22 11:22:47 AM

namatad: culebra: The author of this article and the author of the piece to which she is referring both sound like insufferable idiots. And those comments: holy fark.

FARK YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
You made me go back and read those comments. Now my brain is REALLY broken.


Yeah, thanks Obama. Now I have to jam a chop-stick in my ear in the hopes that it will destroy the memories of those comments.
 
2013-04-22 11:27:25 AM

gglibertine: CeroX: What Men Want? It's different for each man, take the time and figure your man out, but use direct communication using language that means what you say, and not passive aggressive nonsense or cryptic terms with double meanings or deep philosophical undertones. Also, we don't want you being upset because the answer if less than 5 words. Our answers aren't passive aggressive nonsense or cryptic terms with double meanings or deep philosophical undertones.

Protip: if you go around making general statements about women that suggest that everything we say is "passive aggressive nonsense or cryptic terms with double meanings or deep philisophical undertones," you are going to come off looking like you don't like women very much.

/I actually like men, I do say what I mean, and I do take the trouble to figure a man out. However, I expect him to extend the same courtesy to me; dismissing women as "impossible to understand" is a cop-out. Of course, such men can always settle for that passive-aggressive nonsense, but it gets awfully boring listening to you complain about it.


so
how many females do you know who fit his generalization?
how long do you put up with someone who fits his generalization?

or are you arguing that no one fits his generalization and he is just being a guy?
 
PJ-
2013-04-22 11:28:47 AM

quickdraw: mike_d85: Um... Where's the real article? It sounds spot on.

/shut up for 5 minutes when I walk in the door please

If you don't want someone who talks get a dog.


My buddy said he was marrying a dog once, turned out she was just a major biatch.
 
2013-04-22 11:31:00 AM
According to Chris Rock, men just want the 3 Fs: feed me, fark me, shut the fark up.

That's how you. recharge a man's "battery," ladies.
 
2013-04-22 11:31:06 AM
Now that's my kind of nonsense: nonsense about nonsense.
 
2013-04-22 11:31:32 AM

kitsuneymg: I find your post and the Boobies amusing. Mostly because the woman who created MLP is a feminist of the "wow, you're not crazy" variety.


I like boobies too
 
2013-04-22 11:32:24 AM
snag.gy
Apparently it was Jezebel
 
2013-04-22 11:33:02 AM
Ladies, we want so very few things it's laughable.

1. Peace for 30min after we get home from work
2. Time to hang out with our friends (you know those guys we had bbq's with, played golf with, etc) Don't try and ban us from a particular friend. We don't tell you not to hang out with that man hating alchy from work.
3. NOT to hear about every single thing that biatch at the office did to you while you passive agressivly hate back on them.
4. I love you and tell you. SAY IT TO ME AT A RANDOM TIME.
5. We don't want to hear about how we left an undershirt in the bathroom, or how a sock got left on the bed etc. If it bothers you move it if it doesn't then I'll get to it when I can.
6. If you come to us with a problem we will offer solutions or fixes for it. Don't come to us looking for sympathy and understanding.
 
2013-04-22 11:36:12 AM
www.dumpaday.com
 
2013-04-22 11:37:03 AM

youmightberight: Ladies, we want so very few things it's laughable.

6. If you come to us with a problem we will offer solutions or fixes for it. Don't come to us looking for sympathy and understanding.


Not entirely true. We can be sympathetic and understanding but not when asked to fix a problem. Logic takes over. Opening with "Can I vent to you about work today" is a much better approach then  "I can't deal with this whore at work! She's such a biatch!"
 
2013-04-22 11:38:07 AM

youmightberight: Ladies, we want so very few things it's laughable.

1. Peace for 30min after we get home from work
2. Time to hang out with our friends (you know those guys we had bbq's with, played golf with, etc) Don't try and ban us from a particular friend. We don't tell you not to hang out with that man hating alchy from work.
3. NOT to hear about every single thing that biatch at the office did to you while you passive agressivly hate back on them.
4. I love you and tell you. SAY IT TO ME AT A RANDOM TIME.
5. We don't want to hear about how we left an undershirt in the bathroom, or how a sock got left on the bed etc. If it bothers you move it if it doesn't then I'll get to it when I can.
6. If you come to us with a problem we will offer solutions or fixes for it. Don't come to us looking for sympathy and understanding.


I short-circuited many a biatch session by my ex-wife this way.  She'd whine about how work is treating her bad, and I'd say "so, quit."  That wasn't an acceptable solution apparently, because it didn't entail letting her run at the mouth for 45 minutes about the <foreign born> co-worker that didn't do their job exactly how she would have.
 
2013-04-22 11:38:28 AM

xaks: Uchiha_Cycliste: Sid_6.7: teto85: 25.media.tumblr.com

You're reading what passes as "feminist critique" among the more modern and less intellectually interested "feminists".

Unlike the feminist of yore, which might have actually had many fine and insightful points to make about how society tends to emphasize and favor the "masculine" over the "feminine" (no, really, guy here, and a lot of feminism is interesting philosophically!), this author, like many of her ilk, have been reduced to complaining about men complaining.

Which, really, is about the opposite of feminism. Hey, lady, how about you stop obsessing over what men say and do, and forge your own place in the world? Yeah, didn't think so, that would be too hard, wouldn't it?

And she's really trying to be funny, but managing to come off as even less funny and more pissy than most conservative "comedians".

Sad.

/and that's what you're reading!

[i426.photobucket.com image 254x192]

\when did feminism stop being about equality?
\\equality is what I still look to create and what my GF and I are all about.

Feminism was never about equality in the first place.

Feminism was about two things. (1.) Reversing the discrimination present against females for no reason other than being female, and (2.) Not only taking over the #1 slot from menfolk, but exacting revenge on them for the past actions of 1.

The more time that has past, the less #1 has meant, and the less the first part of #2 has meant. It's all about the revenge now, and has been for quite some time.


but why?
How does anyone benefit from that? Simple petty short term satisfaction? Ironically reinforcing the situations that caused the situation leading to a desire for revenge. Does anyone look at the long term outlook?

Anyways, I stand by me and my girlfriend... equality.
Interestingly, we came to our equality views independently which I think is a really important thing.. it meant I wasn't just proclaiming similar ideas because I wanted to be closer to her. There are many views, ideas and feelings that I have co-opted from her, and likewise her from me. But this one; we both realized early on both that it was an important idea and it was something worth trying our damndest to reinforce.
while we've only been dating for a year, I've been asking her out for 15 years and we've been best friends for 25 =3
 
2013-04-22 11:40:32 AM

gglibertine: CeroX: What Men Want? It's different for each man, take the time and figure your man out, but use direct communication using language that means what you say, and not passive aggressive nonsense or cryptic terms with double meanings or deep philosophical undertones. Also, we don't want you being upset because the answer if less than 5 words. Our answers aren't passive aggressive nonsense or cryptic terms with double meanings or deep philosophical undertones.

Protip: if you go around making general statements about women that suggest that everything we say is "passive aggressive nonsense or cryptic terms with double meanings or deep philisophical undertones," you are going to come off looking like you don't like women very much.

/I actually like men, I do say what I mean, and I do take the trouble to figure a man out. However, I expect him to extend the same courtesy to me; dismissing women as "impossible to understand" is a cop-out. Of course, such men can always settle for that passive-aggressive nonsense, but it gets awfully boring listening to you complain about it.


Let me ask you these: How much do you think we will get to know each other on Fark threads for me not to use a generalization just for your benefit? Do you honestly think i wouldn't try and get to know someone after giving advice for someone to get to know us? Or did i generalize because Fark threads aren't exactly what you call the most ideal place to meet people you really want to get to know?
 
2013-04-22 11:43:13 AM

miss diminutive: How about we just call a truce in the whole battle of the sexes thing?


Because it's not profitable to the people whose sole existence is to hijack movements, reduce it to some shadow of its former self, then parrot out their views for money?
 
2013-04-22 11:45:33 AM

SpectroBoy: [i.chzbgr.com image 450x548]


i.chzbgr.com
The only thing I could think was "Holy hell, there is no way they could eat all that food in the 2-5 days it will take that food to go bad".
 
2013-04-22 11:48:18 AM

Oblio13: Advice to young men: The most spoiled and privileged women in the world are also the most whiney and entitled. Before you settle down, visit some other countries and meet a few whose factory default isn't "alimony bomb looking for a place to go off".


Like where, exactly? Like Thailand?

ecx.images-amazon.com

Asian women just delay the emasculation until after the birth of a child. And the Visa, or green card. And all your money.

/what else ya got?
 
2013-04-22 11:51:04 AM

Job Creator: I short-circuited many a biatch session by my ex-wife this way. She'd whine about how work is treating her bad, and I'd say "so, quit." That wasn't an acceptable solution apparently, because it didn't entail letting her run at the mouth for 45 minutes about the <foreign born> co-worker that didn't do their job exactly how she would have.


Those conversations are awkward and often end badly

Her: X bad thing happened
Me: That sucks
Her: And it's going to keep happening because of Y factor at work and Z person is just loving it and is probably evil
Me: <racks brains to think of sensible solution>
Her: It's really getting me down and it's horrible
Me: <thinking really hard, because I genuinely care>
Her: And these three other things make it worse
Me: Here is a perfectly rational solution to all of this. You need to do A, B and C. Or quit
Her: I suppose... but... here is the same rant with different words
Me: ??

And we come away with the woman thinking the man doesn't listen well (he just says things to try and make me shut up!), the man confused as to why he's in the doghouse (I was listening! If I didn't care I wouldn't have suggested a solution!) and the next time something comes up either she won't talk to him (which starts the resentment building up) or he'll just nod and not actually listen (because if she really wanted me to listen she'd want my advice, as it is I may as well be the cat).
 
2013-04-22 11:52:13 AM

fluffy2097: Dion Fortune: I've realized that the way to react to "feminist" derp like this is just to not engage with it.  Deep down it's a cry for attention (and page views).

I like to rape it out of the broads, then punch em in the stomach to keep her from being pregnant.

When a woman cries, I slap her repeatedly and tell her top stop with her hysterics, and tell her "one of these days. POW! ZOOM! Straight to the moon!"

Once you've driven a women to a broken, quivering pile of human garbage, you'll finally get your blowjob!


So, you've read Stephen R. Donaldson's The Gap into Vision series.
 
2013-04-22 11:52:28 AM

Uchiha_Cycliste: Anyways, I stand by me and my girlfriend... equality.
Interestingly, we came to our equality views independently which I think is a really important thing.. it meant I wasn't just proclaiming similar ideas because I wanted to be closer to her. There are many views, ideas and feelings that I have co-opted from her, and likewise her from me. But this one; we both realized early on both that it was an important idea and it was something worth trying our damndest to reinforce.
while we've only been dating for a year, I've been asking her out for 15 years and we've been best friends for 25 =3


global3.memecdn.com
 
2013-04-22 11:52:39 AM
Current biggest pet peeve with regard to communication is that I hate getting answers to questions I haven't asked.

Me: What do you want for dinner?
Her: If you want to make that chicken we bought the other day I can find something else.
Me: Ok.  What do you want for dinner?
Her: It doesn't matter.  You can have the chicken.

Please, just answer the question I asked, not the question you think I am asking.
 
2013-04-22 11:54:18 AM

Job Creator: She'd whine about how work is treating her bad, and I'd say "so, quit."


this works for almost everything
your parents or uncle call you every sunday
and EVERY sunday they make you crazy

dont answer the phone on sunday and HANG UP !!!!
 
2013-04-22 11:54:32 AM
I think EVERYONE would like his or her home to be a place to recharge, an oasis from the crap of the world. But we have to take turns being the oasis. That's all.
 
2013-04-22 11:55:39 AM

dustygrimp: Current biggest pet peeve with regard to communication is that I hate getting answers to questions I haven't asked.

Me: What do you want for dinner?
Her: If you want to make that chicken we bought the other day I can find something else.
Me: Ok.  What do you want for dinner?
Her: It doesn't matter.  You can have the chicken.

Please, just answer the question I asked, not the question you think I am asking.


hahahaha
me: where do you want to go for dinner
her: I dont care, you pick
me: mexican it is
her 10 years later: oh my god you always made me go to that mexican place
me: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
 
2013-04-22 11:56:02 AM

Egoy3k: My wife in unemployed right now. When I wake up and go to work, she's there. When I go home for lunch, she's there. When I get home from work, she's there. On the weekends, she's there.

If the first thing I am greeted with almost every day after being at work is a rant about what 'that biatch at the laundromat said/did/didn't do/didn't say' Then yes I do want her to shut the hell up and no I don't give a shiat about her feelings. I just spent 10 hours doing things that I don't want to do so we can afford our lifestyle. I  want some sort of acknowledgement for the things I do. Not every day just sometimes. I tell her I appreciate the clean apartment and having my laundry done why doesn't the same apply to me? If it were a serious discussion about something important I would listen attentively but it's almost never anything that makes a difference.

At that moment in time the way I perceive the situation is that I'm expecting something and she isn't delivering it and instead she is creating drama about childish bullshiat and wasting my time. That is when I go play video games for an hour and ignore her. I don't do that because I'm an asshole I do that because I have feelings as well and she stomped all over mine. Before anybody asks, yes I have explained this and yes she understood and yes we have gotten over the issue.  Not many relationships have open dialog about that sort of thing though so I can completely see this sort of thing playing out for a long time and ultimately killing a relationship.


She's probably just stressed out and worried about being unemployed.
 
2013-04-22 12:03:47 PM

DeaH: I think EVERYONE would like his or her home to be a place to recharge, an oasis from the crap of the world. But we have to take turns being the oasis. That's all.


THIS.

When I get home from work, I don't want to hear about all of his new and complicated deck building scenarios, at least not right away. I don't want to learn a new gaming system on date-night, and be expected to multitask in other fantasy setting conversations at the same time. I read all friggin' day at work and my brain is tired. Just give me the dice, and tell me what to roll, already.
Also, don't complain that I button mash. I'm tired, and don't want to memorize button pattern bs.

Just let me friggin' relax, and maybe listen to me vent about bs at work for 30 minutes. You're just gonna bs anyway, why can't I get crap off my chest.

/Yes, I make sammiches.
 
2013-04-22 12:06:56 PM

namatad: dustygrimp: Current biggest pet peeve with regard to communication is that I hate getting answers to questions I haven't asked.

Me: What do you want for dinner?
Her: If you want to make that chicken we bought the other day I can find something else.
Me: Ok.  What do you want for dinner?
Her: It doesn't matter.  You can have the chicken.

Please, just answer the question I asked, not the question you think I am asking.

hahahaha
me: where do you want to go for dinner
her: I dont care, you pick
me: mexican it is
her 10 years later: oh my god you always made me go to that mexican place
me: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU


HAHAAAA that's what we use our kids for now:

Before kids:
me: What do you want for dinner
her: I don't know, what do YOU want
me: Well i know what i DON'T want
her: Which is
me: [insert what i had for lunch that day]
her: ok, well, then what do you want
me: i seriously don't care as long as it's not [lunch]
her: me either
me: how about [food]
her: nah, i'm not really in the mood for that
me: I thought you didn't care
her: I didn't, but now [food] doesn't sound good
... continue this for 1/2 hour

now:
me: what do you want for dinner
her: I don't know, what do you want?
me: not [Lunch]
her: hey [kid's name], what do you want for dinner?
kid: [insert kid favorite here]
us: no! how about [food]
kid: ok fine
her: [food] sounds good!

As long as i don't make the first suggestion, i end up picking what we eat, without argument, because letting the kids choose pizza or macaroni and cheese every night of the week would be horrible
 
2013-04-22 12:09:05 PM
Warning: The following post contains sweeping generalizations.


The difference between men and women in relationships is how they view the courtship process. When a man and woman start dating, it is on the man to prove his worth to the woman. This includes showing her a good time and flexing his influence a bit. Even though the man paying for everything is old fashioned in the 21st century, it's still important to prove his worth as a provider. More importantly then just shelling out cash, he needs to provide novel experiences. What is a woman more likely to brag about to her friends: "My date took me to the Capitol Grill (stuffy, dated steakhouse) and the bill was several hundred dollars," OR "My date took me to this hot new place that no one can get a table at and we went through the kitchen like Goodfellas"? Women crave novel experiences and brushes with exclusivity.


As the relationship becomes established, a man begins to feel that he has moved past the interview phase and is no longer responsible for entertaining his woman 24 hours a day. This is where the conflict comes from. The author of this article is clearly frustrated because her man (poor bastard) wants to come home and only be responsible for amusing himself. She feels that it is his responsibility to provide her entertainment. She tries to flip it and make it appear as though she is expected to pleasure him and make him a sandwich because this allows her righteous indignation. But in reality, the smart money says this guy just wants half an hour to himself to crack a beer and watch ESPN.


Every single man I know has at least one hobby or interest: Golf, playing basketball with his friends, fishing, RPGs, woodworking, homebrewing, motorcycle riding, collecting obscure European pornography, whatever. Far fewer women I know have hobbies. The ones that do, tend to be older. I blame Cosmo and Sex and the City. That entire lifestyle is to consume and have novel experiences and it's influenced a whole generation of young women who have no idea how to amuse themselves without a man, or at least a pack of other women to talk about men with.
 
2013-04-22 12:11:48 PM
What an insulting piece of crap.  biatch should get a coont punch.
 
2013-04-22 12:15:38 PM
Man, what a lame excuse for an article.
 
2013-04-22 12:18:39 PM

Gothnet: Those conversations are awkward and often end badly


Ha. Your wife sounds a lot like mine. She's basically admitted that she doesn't actually WANT me to fix the problem or suggest solutions she just wants to vent. I'm an engineer, you can't explain problem to me without me thinking of possible solutions before you even finish explaining the problem. I can't help it, it's what makes me good at my job.  It's what infuriates all of my employees. They like my wife are not engineers, they like my wife would rather blame someone and get angry rather than put systems in place to preclude the problem from ever happening again.

This is why I hate having to talk about this stuff right after I get home from work.

dv-ous: She's probably just stressed out and worried about being unemployed.


I'm sure she is. I'm also stressed out and worried about her being unemployed.  That doesn't excuse treating each other like shiat though does it?
 
2013-04-22 12:23:31 PM

dustygrimp: Current biggest pet peeve with regard to communication is that I hate getting answers to questions I haven't asked.

Me: What do you want for dinner?
Her: If you want to make that chicken we bought the other day I can find something else.
Me: Ok.  What do you want for dinner?
Her: It doesn't matter.  You can have the chicken.

Please, just answer the question I asked, not the question you think I am asking.


I have already decided I want something other than the chicken we just bought.
But I don't want to waste the chicken.  You eat that.  I will have what I want.
 
2013-04-22 12:24:48 PM

Fausts Fist: Brilliant piece.

Reading through the bullshiat I'm almost sure Tracy Moore has never had a long-term relationship or a job with more than 30 hours work per week.

Tracy Moore is married and has children. But kudos on your awesome assumptions, bro!
 
2013-04-22 12:28:26 PM

Doak: Fausts Fist: Brilliant piece.

Reading through the bullshiat I'm almost sure Tracy Moore has never had a long-term relationship or a job with more than 30 hours work per week.
Tracy Moore is married and has children. But kudos on your awesome assumptions, bro!


I don't think white knighting her on Fark is going to win her away from her family, bro!
 
2013-04-22 12:29:01 PM

karlandtanya: dustygrimp: Current biggest pet peeve with regard to communication is that I hate getting answers to questions I haven't asked.

Me: What do you want for dinner?
Her: If you want to make that chicken we bought the other day I can find something else.
Me: Ok.  What do you want for dinner?
Her: It doesn't matter.  You can have the chicken.

Please, just answer the question I asked, not the question you think I am asking.

I have already decided I want something other than the chicken we just bought.
But I don't want to waste the chicken.  You eat that.  I will have what I want.


Is it so hard to just say that?
 
2013-04-22 12:29:59 PM

Egoy3k: Ha. Your wife sounds a lot like mine. She's basically admitted that she doesn't actually WANT me to fix the problem or suggest solutions she just wants to vent. I'm an engineer, you can't explain problem to me without me thinking of possible solutions before you even finish explaining the problem. I can't help it, it's what makes me good at my job. It's what infuriates all of my employees. They like my wife are not engineers, they like my wife would rather blame someone and get angry rather than put systems in place to preclude the problem from ever happening again.


We'll call her "ex-girlfriend" rather than wife, but yeah, this!
 
2013-04-22 12:31:38 PM
biatch I'm not a predator I am a bunny. I like farking, eating, and being left alone, but most of all? Silence.
 
2013-04-22 12:31:57 PM

Oblio13: Advice to young men: The most spoiled and privileged women in the world are also the most whiney and entitled. Before you settle down, visit some other countries and meet a few whose factory default isn't "alimony bomb looking for a place to go off".


This is advice I wish I had as a young man...

Tips : Thailand, Brazil, Spain, Greece.

The first two for what you are looking for and the last two to see what that lovely young pretty thing you just met will look like in 20 years (spain not good, greece kill it with fire)...
 
2013-04-22 12:32:39 PM

Gothnet: Her: X bad thing happened
Me: That sucks
Her: And it's going to keep happening because of Y factor at work and Z person is just loving it and is probably evil
Me: <racks brains to think of sensible solution>
Her: It's really getting me down and it's horrible
Me: <thinking really hard, because I genuinely care>
Her: And these three other things make it worse
Me: Here is a perfectly rational solution to all of this. You need to do A, B and C. Or quit
Her: I suppose... but... here is the same rant with different words
Me: ??


"Call your mother" is what I like to insert somewhere in there.  She's there to agree with whatever you say, I'm here to offer easy suggestions on how to deal with whatever small issue is occurring.  I don't need to listen to nod my head and say "that sucks."
 
2013-04-22 12:34:51 PM

AngryDragon: karlandtanya: dustygrimp: Current biggest pet peeve with regard to communication is that I hate getting answers to questions I haven't asked.

Me: What do you want for dinner?
Her: If you want to make that chicken we bought the other day I can find something else.
Me: Ok.  What do you want for dinner?
Her: It doesn't matter.  You can have the chicken.

Please, just answer the question I asked, not the question you think I am asking.

I have already decided I want something other than the chicken we just bought.
But I don't want to waste the chicken.  You eat that.  I will have what I want.

Is it so hard to just say that?


Actually, if my woman-speak is working correctly, since she said other day, that translates to:

"There's chicken in there i think is going to go bad if you don't fix it, but either a) i don't want it or b) i don't like your chicken, and i swear to God if that chicken goes bad i'm going to be so upset about it it i won't talk about it for days until you ask me "what's wrong" for the 35th time when i finally blow up about it. so you better eat it for your own good. while i have a salad because i'm feeling self conscious today"
 
2013-04-22 12:35:20 PM

Yanks_RSJ: Gothnet: Her: X bad thing happened
Me: That sucks
Her: And it's going to keep happening because of Y factor at work and Z person is just loving it and is probably evil
Me: <racks brains to think of sensible solution>
Her: It's really getting me down and it's horrible
Me: <thinking really hard, because I genuinely care>
Her: And these three other things make it worse
Me: Here is a perfectly rational solution to all of this. You need to do A, B and C. Or quit
Her: I suppose... but... here is the same rant with different words
Me: ??

"Call your mother" is what I like to insert somewhere in there.  She's there to agree with whatever you say, I'm here to offer easy suggestions on how to deal with whatever small issue is occurring.  I don't need to listen to nod my head and say "that sucks."


I get told ALL the time I'm supposed to listen to nonsensical ranting without giving the slightest hint of offering a solution.

fark that.
 
2013-04-22 12:40:52 PM

plewis: What an insulting piece of crap.  biatch should get a coont punchpunt.


FTFY
 
2013-04-22 12:41:39 PM

Owangotang: I get told ALL the time I'm supposed to listen to nonsensical ranting without giving the slightest hint of offering a solution.

fark that.


You don't have to listen to the content. Just the most vauge overaching concept.

See, When they rant like that you can exhaust them by saying nothing more then "uh-huh" "yup, I agree" and " That's terrible!" at the right moments

You only have to listen hard enough that you can put each of those 3 statements in the correct verbal pauses. It's not hard.

The trick is if they start to suspect you're doing it, they'll ask you a question. If one of their sentences ends with an upward inflection and you can't give the proper "I agree with what you've been talking about", you're farked.
 
2013-04-22 12:43:21 PM

Owangotang: I get told ALL the time I'm supposed to listen to nonsensical ranting without giving the slightest hint of offering a solution.

fark that.


Yeah, that's irritating.  I'm lucky in that my GF usually prefaces such exchanges by warning me that she just needs to rant.  With that in mind, I shift into "mindless agreeable automaton" mode for 5-7 minutes.
 
2013-04-22 12:44:00 PM

Doak: Fausts Fist: Brilliant piece.

Reading through the bullshiat I'm almost sure Tracy Moore has never had a long-term relationship or a job with more than 30 hours work per week.
Tracy Moore is married and has children. But kudos on your awesome assumptions, bro!


Those poor children.
 
2013-04-22 12:44:34 PM

karlandtanya: dustygrimp: Current biggest pet peeve with regard to communication is that I hate getting answers to questions I haven't asked.

Me: What do you want for dinner?
Her: If you want to make that chicken we bought the other day I can find something else.
Me: Ok.  What do you want for dinner?
Her: It doesn't matter.  You can have the chicken.

Please, just answer the question I asked, not the question you think I am asking.

I have already decided I want something other than the chicken we just bought.
But I don't want to waste the chicken.  You eat that.  I will have what I want.


And that, ladies, is how you get a half-hour of unreciprocated oral sex.
 
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