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(ABC) NewsFlash The latest: Boston Marathon bombing suspects identified. One dead, manhunt for the second is underway, ALL OF BOSTON on lockdown   (abcnews.go.com) divider line 2731
    More: NewsFlash, Boston Marathon, Massachusetts State Police, Watertown, Dzhokhar Tsarnaev  
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22426 clicks; posted to Main » on 19 Apr 2013 at 11:34 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»


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2013-04-19 11:15:11 AM

ha-ha-guy: d23: Robots are trying to undress the guy?

Getting awfully rapey in Boston now.


The machines have achieved sentience...and they are horny.
 
2013-04-19 11:15:13 AM
"Subject has some sort of device, they saw it when they tackled him"

and

"Both residences have been cleared"
 
2013-04-19 11:15:16 AM

jso2897: Damn I love Farkers. You never learn. After the last 24 hours of total wrong and fail, y'all are still talking about who these guys are and why they did it (assuming they did).
You're really f**king precious.


Oh, gross!  I'm sorry but not only was that a mediocre movie she is really not my type.  I've sorta sworn off sex altogether, though, in an experiment to see if I can focus my sexual energies on increasing my mental capacity and learning abilities.

I think a side effect is being naive sometimes and taking things too literally, but I haven't explored that hypothesis to a final conclusion yet...too many other things to do like respond to trolls on the internet.
 
2013-04-19 11:15:19 AM

mjg

Let the 'profiling' of an entire country (Chechnya) begin.


Yeah, far right wing secretary here has already been chanting "Islam connection knnneeeewww it" in sing song voice.

 
2013-04-19 11:15:21 AM
Long past time for people to grab their guns and bring their cats in, this looks to be a long day.
 
2013-04-19 11:15:22 AM
the robot didn't even kiss him first
 
mjg
2013-04-19 11:15:22 AM
HuffPo should have reactions from Ben Affleck and Mark Wahlberg shortly.
 
2013-04-19 11:15:26 AM

mjg: Let the 'profiling' of an entire country (Chechnya) begin.

/ugh


After 20 years of separatist conflict, I seriously doubt that this event will be more than a blip on Chechnya's global profile.
 
2013-04-19 11:15:32 AM

muck4doo: jonathan_L: muck4doo: jonathan_L: muck4doo: Thanks for the answer. My son is going to graduate from Baylor next month, and is in the Army ROTC(was originally in Air Force ROTC, but funding got cut). They've had him studying Russian for four years.

Is he good with languages? Another 1 or 2 languages under his belt will really help him.

Yes, he is. I'm sure not. He speaks English, Russian, and Spanish.

If he has time/inclination, I'd suggest he also look into Farsi/Persian or one of the Afghan languages.

Knowing him, he would love that. I'm Mexican(raised in CA), his mom is half Jewish/half Italian. He speaks better Spanish than I do.


Best of luck to him! And thank him for his service should he continue in the Army.
 
2013-04-19 11:15:34 AM
I just hope the robot isn't running Windows 95.
 
2013-04-19 11:15:39 AM

Theory Of Null: Nabb1: News now reporting Dhokhar was able to withdraw money from an ATM last night.  BIG scoop there, guys.  BIG scoop.

So if they had money why would they rob a 711. Something is farked.


Maybe the 12$ in a college student's account wasn't enough to flee the country...or city...

/Or maybe 19 year old MURDERERS aren't rocket scientists?!

//Nah, let's jump straight to conspiracy.
 
2013-04-19 11:15:41 AM

Theory Of Null: Nabb1: News now reporting Dhokhar was able to withdraw money from an ATM last night.  BIG scoop there, guys.  BIG scoop.

So if they had money why would they rob a 711. Something is farked.


Because they needed more than the $500 that the ATM would spit out?
 
2013-04-19 11:15:46 AM
For those of us just tuning in, what's the status of this ordeal?   I went to bed right after Fark crashed following the taxi cab "In custody!" event.
 
2013-04-19 11:15:47 AM
The officers who tackled him confirmed he had a device or switch in his hand.
Stupid jitterbug
 
2013-04-19 11:15:52 AM
Movin people fast!
 
2013-04-19 11:15:53 AM
36 boylston move?
 
2013-04-19 11:15:55 AM

d23: Robots are trying to undress the guy?


I've seen some weird pron but jeez........
 
d23 [TotalFark]
2013-04-19 11:16:11 AM
if you're not on the swat team, get away from the buffet.

The swat team goes first, guys.  That's what we agreed to!
 
2013-04-19 11:16:23 AM
Jim from SP:  Should we call in Cena to give this guy an AA?
 
2013-04-19 11:16:43 AM
Wait, there are 3 suspects?!  Two still on the loose?

I can't keep up with Fark anymore.
 
2013-04-19 11:17:01 AM

The Life Of Brian: WHY does CNN keep saying the police are calling for a Russian translator??

Heard nothing like that on the scanner..and the suspect speaks fluent english/been in country & went to highschool for years!


His native language is Russian. He may speak fluent English but at a super stressful time like this, it's better to talk to him in his native language. Also, I think they have his father in Russia on the phone.
 
2013-04-19 11:17:29 AM
mjg: Let the 'profiling' of an entire country (Chechnya) begin.

To be fair, this is how Americans learn physical and cultural geography. People couldn't be bothered to learn what Serbia was until Clinton started dropping bombs.
 
2013-04-19 11:19:30 AM

Ctrl-Alt-Del: They're hardcore religious nut jobs - anti-abortion, anti-evolution, anti-pornography, opposed to sex outside of marriage, in favor of harsh anti-drug laws, opposed to feminism, virulently anti-homosexual.


They also dislike the Western paternalism & against Imperialism by the West. They don't like the State of Israel. They are often pro-socialism, especially more radical ones shut out of the system.

And libby libs want to raise them up, while conny cons want to blow the hell out of the brown dudes & any non-Xians.

What's your point? You see the monolithic Other as your enemy, in everything, like the retard RW you hate?
 
2013-04-19 11:20:19 AM

Coco LaFemme: NewsBreaker @NewsBreaker 7m

BREAKING: Cop in Watertown, Mass to NBC's Kerry Sanders: "If you knew what was going on, you wouldn't be standing here right now." - @mhking


but the media never knows shiat...
 
2013-04-19 11:20:25 AM
The robot is working on the suspect now.
 
2013-04-19 11:20:35 AM
THE ROBOT IS ON HIM NOW
 
2013-04-19 11:21:17 AM

StreetlightInTheGhetto: LewDux: Fissile: Slavic people self identified as Slavic for centuries.

I really doubt it

The department at my alma mater where Polish language/culture studies are located:

Welcome to Slavic Languages and Literatures. Our faculty specialize in Eastern European Literatures and Cultures, including focus on cinema, architecture, and the visual arts.  The cultures we cover include Russian, Polish, Czech, Ukrainian, and Bosnian-Croatian-Serbian; we also have strong interest in Judaic, Central Asian, Baltic, and Balkan cultures (including Greek and Albanian).


Slavic languages are old, self identification as huge etnolinguistic group isn't
 
2013-04-19 11:21:22 AM

Coco LaFemme: NewsBreaker @NewsBreaker 7m

BREAKING: Cop in Watertown, Mass to NBC's Kerry Sanders: "If you knew what was going on, you wouldn't be standing here right now." - @mhking


Holy fark.
 
2013-04-19 11:21:47 AM
FARK servers, why do u suck?! T_T
 
2013-04-19 11:21:50 AM
...a Chechen nationalist? Well, isn't that special, considering as far as I know the US hasn't done squat to hack off the Chechens in a few years.
 
2013-04-19 11:21:56 AM

miss diminutive: [24.media.tumblr.com image 207x237]

Faster, dammit! Information overload.


Drew needs to find a way for me to inject Fark directly into my veins.

Information is my drug and you all are my dealers.
 
2013-04-19 11:22:20 AM

urger: The robot is working on the suspect now.


Bow chika bow wow
 
2013-04-19 11:22:22 AM
Buzzfeed put up a collection of locked-down Boston pics.  Some of them are indeed odd.
 
2013-04-19 11:22:23 AM

schief2: did i hear the scanner say "use the robot to get the jacket off him"?


24.media.tumblr.com
 
2013-04-19 11:22:37 AM
Just when the story couldn't get any crazier, we've now moved onto the next chapter: Robot Rape.
 
2013-04-19 11:22:42 AM
EOD is deploying a second robot.
 
2013-04-19 11:22:46 AM

jso2897: Infernalist: jso2897: Damn I love Farkers. You never learn. After the last 24 hours of total wrong and fail, y'all are still talking about who these guys are and why they did it (assuming they did).
You're really f**king precious.

have a cookie, grandpa.  Matlock will be on in a bit, I promise.

Yeah, I'd be too embarrassed to argue if I were you, too.

Smgth: jso2897: Damn I love Farkers. You never learn. After the last 24 hours of total wrong and fail, y'all are still talking about who these guys are and why they did it (assuming they did).
You're really f**king precious.

Yup, you're certainly not a Farker...

I sure as hell am - didn't I just say I loved Farkers? I'm just not one of the ones with an all-knowing crystal ball.


You lost your crystal bullshiat ball? Better call Drew and get a replacement quickly before you start to act reasonably
 
2013-04-19 11:23:08 AM

ha-ha-guy: d23: Robots are trying to undress the guy?

Getting awfully rapey in Boston now.


1.bp.blogspot.com

http://www.nbc.com/saturday-night-live/video/old-glory-insurance/n10 76 6/
 
2013-04-19 11:23:17 AM

Somacandra: mjg: Let the 'profiling' of an entire country (Chechnya) begin.

To be fair, this is how Americans learn physical and cultural geography. People couldn't be bothered to learn what Serbia was until Clinton started dropping bombs.


Glad Fark stayed up long enough for you to post that...mine got eaten.
 
2013-04-19 11:23:47 AM
i.imgur.com
 
2013-04-19 11:24:03 AM
img505.imageshack.us
 
2013-04-19 11:24:05 AM
A SECOND ROBOT HAS HIT THE SOUTH BOMBER
 
2013-04-19 11:24:09 AM
I love it.  They are interviewing the uncle - Question:  "Any reason you can think why they did this?"  Uncle: "They are losers!"
 
2013-04-19 11:24:21 AM

Captain Steroid: FARK servers, why do u suck?! T_T


Muffins
 
2013-04-19 11:24:32 AM

zabadu: Why do all the news stations find people to say "he was such a nice guy"..."I would never have thought it was him"..."he was so sweet"...no one farking cares.  He's a killer now.  Who cares what he "was" because he obviously wasn't.


They're trying to get all the nice kids rounded up for re-education, so they can bring us only the news that makes us not want to live on this planet anymore.
 
2013-04-19 11:24:48 AM
No doubt the other 99.9% of Muslims who are "peaceful" (lol) will finally call upon that last .1% to stop the killing of innocents.  Muslims will probably hold candlelight vigils in honor of the victims.  Cue the press "releasing" pictures of peaceful muslims in the middle east holding up signs (in perfect english) which say things like "Iranians hearts go out to Boston" etc for the liberal sheeple.
 
2013-04-19 11:26:03 AM

Captain Steroid: FARK servers, why do u suck?! T_T


they took noted from the SimCity servers.
 
2013-04-19 11:26:03 AM
On NBC right now. The Uncle is slamming them for being losers and hating everyone. DAMN.
 
2013-04-19 11:26:23 AM

phyrkrakr: Hey, instead of beating the Islam/Teabagger drums, how about a different conspiracy? These guys are from Chechnya, right? Any way we can tie them into the Boris Berezovsky thing in London? Berezovsky supposedly had some ties to the underworld over there.


Correct, Putin and Boris were good friends
 
2013-04-19 11:26:34 AM

jonathan_L: muck4doo: jonathan_L: muck4doo: jonathan_L: muck4doo: Thanks for the answer. My son is going to graduate from Baylor next month, and is in the Army ROTC(was originally in Air Force ROTC, but funding got cut). They've had him studying Russian for four years.

Is he good with languages? Another 1 or 2 languages under his belt will really help him.

Yes, he is. I'm sure not. He speaks English, Russian, and Spanish.

If he has time/inclination, I'd suggest he also look into Farsi/Persian or one of the Afghan languages.

Knowing him, he would love that. I'm Mexican(raised in CA), his mom is half Jewish/half Italian. He speaks better Spanish than I do.

Best of luck to him! And thank him for his service should he continue in the Army.


That's his plan. Going to graduate and go into the Army as a 2nd Lieutenant. He's proven to be a lot smarter than I ever was when planning life than I was at his age.
 
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