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(Independent)   International Cycling Union: "Hey. Lance Armstrong tested positive for 'roids 4 times during the 1999 Tour De France. Our bad, guys. Also, retests of those samples in 2005 were also positive, but we did nothing. Our bad. That's on us. We good?"   (independent.co.uk) divider line 23
    More: Dumbass, International Cycling Union, 1999 Tour de France, Tour de France, Bradley Wiggins, U.S. Postal, EPO, taste  
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1992 clicks; posted to Sports » on 17 Apr 2013 at 6:38 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



23 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-04-17 05:39:21 PM
lawl
 
2013-04-17 06:34:33 PM
traces of corticosteroids

Really, corticosteroids..........
 
2013-04-17 06:49:48 PM
Well there goes that "he never failed a test" argument.
 
2013-04-17 06:49:50 PM
They didn't have the balls to charge him.
 
2013-04-17 06:52:40 PM
Next year they're gonna disqualify the whole field except for a token Frenchman just to be safe.
 
2013-04-17 07:03:28 PM

cameroncrazy1984: Well there goes that "he never failed a test" argument.


Well, if they told him he didn't fail the test, how the hell was he to know? :)
 
2013-04-17 07:07:00 PM
Who cares, the guy rode a bike. I rode a bike when I was 12. Get a car already.
 
2013-04-17 07:07:31 PM
Yea whatever. On a side note, if the USPS is always complaining about losing money then why are they spending, presumably, millions of dollars on sponsorships?
 
2013-04-17 07:23:13 PM
cameroncrazy1984

Well there goes that "he never failed a test got caught" argument.

Fixed. Read the report, you couldn't "fail" the tests, which is why nobody got caught unless they f*cked up ..... or in Lance's case, covered up.....

McQuaid go f*ck yourself you corrupt piece of sh*t....I hope LeMond tears you a new ass.....
 
2013-04-17 07:44:29 PM

devilskware: Yea whatever. On a side note, if the USPS is always complaining about losing money then why are they spending, presumably, millions of dollars on sponsorships?


1) they stopped the sponsorship years ago
2) comes out of the advertising budget
3) do you know -why- the USPS is in the red?
 
2013-04-17 08:23:15 PM
ICU - Yeah, DIAF.
 
2013-04-17 10:41:20 PM
He rode dirty every year and you have to be farking blind to not see it. Nice to have a little confirmation but I soapy hope no one is shocked. He 'passed' more tests with lawyers and the threat of litigation than he ever did with his urine. Besides, his main tactic was having the lab equipment and funding to micro dose right up to the limit. All but the very best funded cheaters simply couldn't match that technique. they'd be rolling the dice on a career ending positive whereas he 'knew' he wasn't gonna pop as he had doctors and lab results monitoring his levels constantly. Yeah, they all doped. Sure. But he's the biggest doper of all time.
 
2013-04-17 10:43:28 PM

Nicholas D. Wolfwood: ICU - Yeah, DIAF.


That would be the same cycling union he made a massive cash donation to. You know, like how major league baseball players donate to the umpires union. Happens all the time...
 
2013-04-17 11:07:41 PM

rjakobi: Next year they're gonna disqualify the whole field except for a token Frenchman just to be safe.


And somehow he'll still come in 9th.
 
2013-04-17 11:23:42 PM

devilskware: Yea whatever. On a side note, if the USPS is always complaining about losing money then why are they spending, presumably, millions of dollars on sponsorships?


It's a cleverly designed advert campaign to make you spend more money on stamps.

/obviously
 
2013-04-17 11:26:21 PM
."Lance?"
"Oh, hello, ICU, what's up?"
"Lance, we have your drug test results back..."
"Did I pass?"
"No Lance, you did not. We found 48 different banned substances in your bloodstream, and 5 other compounds that have not yet been identified by medical science."
"Huh.....that's weird."
"Funny should mention weird, because during the lab work your blood actually broke through a test tube and tried to infect one of the lab assistants. You know Harvey, right?."
"Oh no, is he OK?"
"Yeah apparently they all wear Level 3 HazMat suits after the testing done during your 4th win. Look, Lance, this isn't good, do you have any kind of explanation at all for this?"
"Saddle sores."
"Beg pardon?"
"You know, sores on my bottom from riding so much. Saddle sores. I have this cream that really helps. It must be a false positive!"
"I see. So what you're telling me is that, out of all the creams, powders, gels and/or lotions in the whole of creation, you just happen to use the one that contains enough steroids to melt our mass spectrometer?"
"It's really great stuff. Botanical aloe-vera based."
"......OK, well I'm glad we could clear that up. Go get 'em, champ."
 
2013-04-17 11:58:43 PM

jayhawk88: ."Lance?"
"Oh, hello, ICU, what's up?"
"Lance, we have your drug test results back..."
"Did I pass?"
"No Lance, you did not. We found 48 different banned substances in your bloodstream, and 5 other compounds that have not yet been identified by medical science."
"Huh.....that's weird."
"Funny should mention weird, because during the lab work your blood actually broke through a test tube and tried to infect one of the lab assistants. You know Harvey, right?."
"Oh no, is he OK?"
"Yeah apparently they all wear Level 3 HazMat suits after the testing done during your 4th win. Look, Lance, this isn't good, do you have any kind of explanation at all for this?"
"Saddle sores."
"Beg pardon?"
"You know, sores on my bottom from riding so much. Saddle sores. I have this cream that really helps. It must be a false positive!"
"I see. So what you're telling me is that, out of all the creams, powders, gels and/or lotions in the whole of creation, you just happen to use the one that contains enough steroids to melt our mass spectrometer?"
"It's really great stuff. Botanical aloe-vera based."
"......OK, well I'm glad we could clear that up. Go get 'em, champ."


No shiat. Yet in every thread we get endless comments about how the French would do anything to bring lance down. Meanwhile, in actual world, it was the us authorities that finally took him down, the French labs were complicit in warning him, and very happy to take his money while he's out on weekends rides with the president of France.
 
2013-04-18 01:34:49 AM

cameroncrazy1984: Well there goes that "he never failed a test" argument.


Assuming you believe the ICU.
 
2013-04-18 02:43:09 AM

JosephFinn: cameroncrazy1984: Well there goes that "he never failed a test" argument.

Assuming you believe the ICU.


Sorry of unnecessary at this point since he admitted finally it. As for his claim he did some of them clean, well, the man is an admitted liar with lots to lose by admitting the whole truth. My question is why you'd believe a damn thing the man says at this point. But due, fark UCI. They covered for him for years and warned him of upcoming tests.
 
2013-04-18 08:41:26 AM
I'm fine with steroids.  I watch sports to be entertained.  People on the juice are more fun to watch.
 
2013-04-18 08:53:21 AM

PepperFreak: I'm fine with steroids.  I watch sports to be entertained.  People on the juice are more fun to watch.


Same here.  I am sick to death of all this useless drug testing.  Bring back the EPO and the roid ragers.
 
2013-04-18 09:43:53 AM

JohnBigBootay: Yet in every thread we get endless comments about how the French would do anything to bring lance down. Meanwhile, in actual world, it was the us authorities that finally took him down, the French labs were complicit in warning him, and very happy to take his money while he's out on weekends rides with the president of France.


That's always confused me. The French were his biggest fans all through his run. There was never a whisper of "zomg we hate the American!" back then. Or since, to my knowledge.
 
2013-04-18 05:42:34 PM
Corticosteroids? Really? Thats the best you have with a 100 million dollar lab?
 
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