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(Telegraph)   Hey, poor people: talk to your kids   (blogs.telegraph.co.uk) divider line 28
    More: Unlikely, wealth distribution, prefrontal cortex, University of Kansas  
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4049 clicks; posted to Geek » on 12 Apr 2013 at 12:40 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-04-12 12:01:32 PM  
Poor boys were found to be the biggest losers

i105.photobucket.com

They're just poor boys, nobody loves them
They're just poor boys, from poor families
They don't hear as many words as the upper class, you see?
 
2013-04-12 12:06:23 PM  
If everyone talked to their young children the same amount, "there would be no racial or socioeconomic gap at all".

Yeah. Probably has nothing to do with the fact that upper class people can afford good schooling for their kids, and tutors if they need them and all that stuff.
 
vpb [TotalFark]
2013-04-12 12:42:40 PM  
I don't know what King Edward saw in that Wallis Simmons dude.
He's aged well though.
 
2013-04-12 12:48:43 PM  
As someone who probably says more than 616 words an hour to my inanimate computer (mostly foul ones, admittedly) and talks to dogs and cats without even thinking about it, I have trouble imagining someone having this problem regarding a small child that's, y'know, actually listening to you.

Lando Lincoln: If everyone talked to their young children the same amount, "there would be no racial or socioeconomic gap at all".

Yeah. Probably has nothing to do with the fact that upper class people can afford good schooling for their kids, and tutors if they need them and all that stuff.


While he's obviously exaggerating, tutors and teachers don't do shiat if the kid isn't interested in learning, and reading/talking to your kids a lot gets them interested in communication, which is basically what school-learning is (a subset of, anyhow).
 
2013-04-12 12:49:59 PM  

Lando Lincoln: Yeah. Probably has nothing to do with the fact that upper class people can afford good schooling for their kids, and tutors if they need them and all that stuff poor children

disproportionatelygrow up in single parent households.
 
2013-04-12 12:57:26 PM  

Jim_Callahan: As someone who probably says more than 616 words an hour to my inanimate computer (mostly foul ones, admittedly) and talks to dogs and cats without even thinking about it, I have trouble imagining someone having this problem regarding a small child that's, y'know, actually listening to you.


I don't. Lower income workers are more likely to work more than one job and at less regular intervals. It also doesn't take much imagination to think that they're less likely to read to children and that the interactions are going to be more likely limited to only one parent.
 
2013-04-12 01:00:00 PM  
My parents had nothing to say.  Still don't
 
2013-04-12 01:03:42 PM  
Hey man I try alright I try.  Its hard sometimes though you know like you got things to do and stuff and those kids well they got their mom already and they got time for that.  I gotta be moving and breathing and those kids they be just sitting there with drool and stuff.    I love my kids but I ain't got time to be a daddy.  I tell you what though if you can tell their moms to let them come visit me up in state, I'll listen to them all they want.
 
2013-04-12 01:05:28 PM  

Lando Lincoln: If everyone talked to their young children the same amount, "there would be no racial or socioeconomic gap at all".

Yeah. Probably has nothing to do with the fact that upper class people can afford good schooling for their kids, and tutors if they need them and all that stuff.


I doubt that.

For example, the distaffbopper and I were pretty proactive in teaching the littlebopper about stuff.  We used every day experiences like shopping, or going for a drive, or going for a walk, or even things like cooking, cleaning, and eating as teachable moments.

We knew, because we can't have biological children, that he was probably going to be our one chance.

We read to him every single day.

We encouraged play with creative toys.  We limited television time, and what was allowable (mostly PBS educational stuff).

Here is a CSB that shows that what you can accomplish:
When the littlebopper was about two and a half years old, the distaffbopper contracted thyroid cancer.  That meant a lot of trips to the hospital, and on one when the distaffbopper was getting some tests, the concierge at the hospital came over and was doting over the littlebopper (he *WAS* damned cute).

She turned to me and said "Is it OK if I get him a B-A-L-L-O-O-N?"

I said "Sure".

She walked off, and the littlebopper looked at me, said "B, A, L, L...... (inhales) BALLOON?!?!?"

The time we had spent reading to him and pointing out the sounds that letters make allowed him to actually sound out what the concierge spelled to me, and it honestly made my jaw drop.  I didn't know he could *DO* that.

And now, he's in the gifted program at school.   We can't claim special socio-economic advantages compared to his peers, and we certainly can claim it is our superior genetics*.  What I think made the difference is that we spent the time with him, talking to him, teaching him things long before he went to school.

The thing is that by they time they enter Kindergarten, it's probably too late.  You have to start as soon as you possibly can.  We were reading picture books to the littlebopper long before he said his first word.  I think we started it when he was around 3 months old, or so, and we didn't stop until he could read books to us.

*How superior can they be if we can't reproduce?
 
2013-04-12 01:41:57 PM  
While I realize Fark isn't the place to discuss child development and best practices regarding child-rearing (unless it's about taking them on a plane or to a restaurant), this is absolutely true. Funny thing about brains. They develop more betters ifn you use it. Talk constantly, even while going about daily life. Describe what you're doing while washing the dishes. Vocalize your every action.

Lo and behold, your three-year-old will teach himself how to read well enough to comprehend a GWB state of the union transcript and use a non-Windows computer more effectively than most HR professionals. Anything that reduces administrative overhead, thus allowing more time for Skyrim, is a good thing.
 
2013-04-12 01:46:17 PM  

Oakenshield: Anything that reduces administrative overhead, thus allowing more time for Skyrim, is a good thing.


Yeah, until you take an arrow to the knee from the littlebopper:

oi40.tinypic.com

/littlebopper at 5 years old.
 
2013-04-12 01:50:42 PM  

Jim_Callahan: While he's obviously exaggerating,


Not for a minute.
 
2013-04-12 02:10:14 PM  
I'll just tell 'em what my daddy told me:

You ain't never gonna amount to nothin'
 
2013-04-12 02:13:33 PM  

dittybopper: /littlebopper at 5 years old.


Didn't watch (or read) We Need To Talk About Kevin, I take it?
 
2013-04-12 02:38:29 PM  

RodneyToady: dittybopper: /littlebopper at 5 years old.

Didn't watch (or read) We Need To Talk About Kevin, I take it?


No, I had to Google it.  Never heard of it.

Not that it would have made a difference.  I don't base my parenting on speculative works of fiction.
 
2013-04-12 02:57:53 PM  

dittybopper: Oakenshield: Anything that reduces administrative overhead, thus allowing more time for Skyrim, is a good thing.

Yeah, until you take an arrow to the knee from the littlebopper:

[oi40.tinypic.com image 640x480]

/littlebopper at 5 years old.


Heh. My oldest is 5 and we've been practicing in the backyard with a homemade bow and some homemade arrows. He thinks it's just about the coolest thing ever.
 
2013-04-12 03:02:32 PM  

dittybopper: Oakenshield: Anything that reduces administrative overhead, thus allowing more time for Skyrim, is a good thing.

Yeah, until you take an arrow to the knee from the littlebopper:

[oi40.tinypic.com image 640x480]

/littlebopper at 5 years old.


25.media.tumblr.com

Seriously. We get it already. You arm your children. It's as interesting as everybody else's kids. Which is to say it's not at all interesting.

/ I'd have probably been more capable of ignoring your billionth HEY LOOK AT MY KID WITH A GUN/BOW/KNIFE/BAZOOKA/MOOSE post since it's just an inane Skyrim reference if I hadn't just done a 180 out of your latest derpstorm in the background checks thread...
 
2013-04-12 03:30:33 PM  
img.foodnetwork.com

my favorite poor boy
 
2013-04-12 03:36:00 PM  

skozlaw: post since it's just an inane Skyrim reference if I hadn't just done a 180 out of your latest derpstorm in the background checks thread...


Meh.

Read what I read up above.  That was the serious stuff.  This was just, as you said, an inane Skyrim reference.

/Derp = stuff you don't agree with.
 
2013-04-12 04:16:39 PM  

Lando Lincoln: If everyone talked to their young children the same amount, "there would be no racial or socioeconomic gap at all".

Yeah. Probably has nothing to do with the fact that upper class people can afford good schooling for their kids, and tutors if they need them and all that stuff.


Come to think of it, poor dumb parents should probably talk even less to their kids so they don't learn how to abuse, be racist, or incapable of basic life skills.

"I learned it from listening to you, dad!"
 
2013-04-12 04:24:46 PM  
I know it's not a popular opinion, or maybe it's just not one people share.  But man, I can't stand poor people.

I'm poor too.  So, for the time being, I'll just have to deal with it.  But it is really astonishing how many problems I have living in a 'poor' area compared to living in a 'middle class' area.  And it's all entirely preventable.  It wouldn't cost any money either.  I won't lie and pretend middle class/rich people don't have the same problems, but they sure have them at lower rates.

And please, don't give me any crap about how 'It's hard to raise children/teach your kids to read/not throw trash out your window/pick up your dog's crap/not play loud music until 3am' when you are poor and have to work.  The poor people I live around either work part-time, or don't work.  The place is built poorly enough that I can tell you, with pinpoint accuracy when my neighbors come and go.  They have NOTHING BUT TIME.
 
2013-04-12 04:25:47 PM  
I once ran over my dad's foot with a toy tractor and he yelled "Dammit all to hell!"

I said "No dad, I'm WTF. Bobby's dammital to hell. Sheesh get it right."
 
2013-04-12 06:01:55 PM  

dittybopper: The thing is that by they time they enter Kindergarten, it's probably too late. You have to start as soon as you possibly can. We were reading picture books to the littlebopper long before he said his first word. I think we started it when he was around 3 months old, or so, and we didn't stop until he could read books to us.


I love reading your parrenting stories.  Good on you and your wife.

I have a 4 and 1 year olds and I am taking a fairly similar tact.  I would like to add as a parrenting do.... TALK TO YOUR KIDS LIKE THEY ARE THINKING HUMAN BEINGS.  My four year old has got an amazing vocabulary and uses it right.  My nieces and neiphews all say my son and I talk strange when using multisyllabic words.  Boggles the mind how college educated people dont talk to their kids in challenging ways.
 
2013-04-12 07:27:42 PM  

dittybopper: She walked off, and the littlebopper looked at me, said "B, A, L, L...... (inhales) BALLOON?!?!?"

The time we had spent reading to him and pointing out the sounds that letters make allowed him to actually sound out what the concierge spelled to me, and it honestly made my jaw drop.  I didn't know he could *DO* that.


*puts on cynicism shades*

Spelling B A L L O O N out loud still sounds amazingly similar to saying the word "balloon"
 
2013-04-12 07:37:20 PM  

Alonjar: dittybopper: She walked off, and the littlebopper looked at me, said "B, A, L, L...... (inhales) BALLOON?!?!?"

The time we had spent reading to him and pointing out the sounds that letters make allowed him to actually sound out what the concierge spelled to me, and it honestly made my jaw drop.  I didn't know he could *DO* that.

*puts on cynicism shades*

Spelling B A L L O O N out loud still sounds amazingly similar to saying the word "balloon"


especially when the kid is hep to the trick from knowing his daddy r-u-n-n-o-f-t
 
2013-04-12 11:47:02 PM  
I TAKE CARE OF MY KIDS!

/N*bombs* always want credit for some shiat they supposed to do.
 
2013-04-13 10:27:30 AM  
Was with this till they said "tv doesn't count". Then I realised it's just more condescending lifestyle bullying by stuck-up middle class libs.
 
2013-04-13 11:09:47 AM  

Alonjar: dittybopper: She walked off, and the littlebopper looked at me, said "B, A, L, L...... (inhales) BALLOON?!?!?"

The time we had spent reading to him and pointing out the sounds that letters make allowed him to actually sound out what the concierge spelled to me, and it honestly made my jaw drop.  I didn't know he could *DO* that.

*puts on cynicism shades*

Spelling B A L L O O N out loud still sounds amazingly similar to saying the word "balloon"


Yes, it does, but how many 2.5 year old kids do you know could have made that connection?  It's not like he had any visual clues, either:  The gift shop was around the corner.

Of course,  it's not like he did that *ALL* the time.  We could use "spell code" for a while afterwards, but I will also note that I-C-E C-R-E-A-M sounds a lot like "ice cream", and he figured that one out fairly quickly also.  Long before he started school, though, we had to give it up completely and use round-about euphemisms, until he started figuring those out too.  Now we're relegated to using one-time pads, and I think he might just be smart enough to decrypt those...

Thing is, I don't think that there is anything all that exceptional about him.  It's just that we raised him in a very verbal environment.   We were so friggin' paranoid about doing it right:  He was our first foster care placement, and we pretty much knew he was going to be freed for adoption, so we put all our effort into doing our best, especially given some of the horror stories we had heard during our mandatory 10 weeks of foster care training.
 
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