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(Daily Mail)   Orthodox Jewish man wears the world's largest ziploc bag on a flight because he is banned from flying over cemeteries due to being a Kohein   (dailymail.co.uk) divider line 294
    More: Interesting, Jewish, Orthodox Judaism, Kohanim, impurities, flights, hole punch, safety hazards  
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18771 clicks; posted to Main » on 12 Apr 2013 at 3:13 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-04-11 11:37:51 PM
That's just farking stupid.
 
2013-04-11 11:59:59 PM

MadSkillz: That's just farking stupid.


This.

Why would the bag be protection, but the plane itself wouldn't be? Also, I didn't know anyone considered 35,000 feet above a cemetery as part of the cemetery for purity purposes, otherwise every Jew who flies would have to go to a mikvah afterwards, and I've never heard of such a ruling.
 
2013-04-12 12:01:49 AM
Eh people are filthy. I can see the point.
 
2013-04-12 12:02:29 AM
Worlds largest penis
 
2013-04-12 12:02:44 AM
the man is a Kohein, religious descendant of the priests of ancient Israel, who are banned from flying over cemeteries.

That's a pretty specific ban from the ancient past.
 
2013-04-12 12:03:29 AM

MadSkillz: That's just farking stupid.


Orthodoxy in any form usually leads to stupidity.  The rules overtake the intent.  In this case, though, could this be fake?
 
2013-04-12 12:15:23 AM

Lsherm: In this case, though, could this be fake?


It's the daily fail, but it's talking about a religious practice, is it's about 50/50 chance.
 
2013-04-12 12:20:22 AM
so my question is, if they can't fly over cemeteries and planes fly at 10,00 feet(or what ever the distance is) then wouldn't being within 10,000 feet of a cemetery on the ground also be a violation?
 
2013-04-12 12:32:30 AM

log_jammin: so my question is, if they can't fly over cemeteries and planes fly at 10,00 feet(or what ever the distance is) then wouldn't being within 10,000 feet of a cemetery on the ground also be a violation?


No, this would be like your property extends into the air above it, too. Or, put another way, if you stepped two feet outside the cemetery gate, you are clearly outside the cemetery, but if you built a scaffold just outside the gate with a plank that extended past the gate inside the boundary of the cemetery but was elevated two feet off the ground, you would not say that you weren't in the cemetery. We naturally assume that the air above the grounds of an area are still considered part of an area. But extending that over a mile upwards seems excessive. I also personally haven't heard of any Jewish group holding by that, and I have an upbringing that I think I would have were it at all prevalent. I'm not saying nobody says this, because there are always really far out there groups, but it's not like this is normal, even for Orthodox Jews.
 
2013-04-12 12:35:10 AM
www.zuguide.com
 
2013-04-12 12:36:18 AM

nmrsnr: log_jammin: so my question is, if they can't fly over cemeteries and planes fly at 10,00 feet(or what ever the distance is) then wouldn't being within 10,000 feet of a cemetery on the ground also be a violation?

No, this would be like your property extends into the air above it, too. Or, put another way, if you stepped two feet outside the cemetery gate, you are clearly outside the cemetery, but if you built a scaffold just outside the gate with a plank that extended past the gate inside the boundary of the cemetery but was elevated two feet off the ground, you would not say that you weren't in the cemetery. We naturally assume that the air above the grounds of an area are still considered part of an area. But extending that over a mile upwards seems excessive. I also personally haven't heard of any Jewish group holding by that, and I have an upbringing that I think I would have were it at all prevalent. I'm not saying nobody says this, because there are always really far out there groups, but it's not like this is normal, even for Orthodox Jews.


The area above the plot of ground is actually an inverted pyramid, too.
 
2013-04-12 12:48:15 AM
Alright, so I did a little googling and found This:

The Halacha is that if the Kohen knows with certainty that a given flight's path takes it over a cemetery, then he must ensure not to take that flight. If, however, he is unsure, then Rabbi Pinchasi says that he may be lenient and travel on that flight... In conclusion, if a Kohen knows with certainty that a plane will fly over a Jewish cemetery, he may not travel on that flight. If he does not know this with certainty, then Rabbi Pinchasi rules that he may take that flight.

So yeah, this seems to be a settled question in Judaism, and "wrap yourself in plastic" is not really a solution anyone proposes.
 
2013-04-12 01:06:17 AM
I'm not sure I believe the veracity of this article.
 
2013-04-12 01:39:32 AM

nmrsnr: Alright, so I did a little googling and found This:

The Halacha is that if the Kohen knows with certainty that a given flight's path takes it over a cemetery, then he must ensure not to take that flight. If, however, he is unsure, then Rabbi Pinchasi says that he may be lenient and travel on that flight... In conclusion, if a Kohen knows with certainty that a plane will fly over a Jewish cemetery, he may not travel on that flight. If he does not know this with certainty, then Rabbi Pinchasi rules that he may take that flight.

So yeah, this seems to be a settled question in Judaism, and "wrap yourself in plastic" is not really a solution anyone proposes.


Well I'm really good that one person gets to speak for all of them.
 
2013-04-12 01:43:34 AM
Stupid, weird shiat isn't just the domain of Mormons and Scientologists.
 
2013-04-12 01:49:34 AM
In "Religuous," Bill Maher put together  a whole segment specifically dedicated to the myriad of ways Orthodox Jews try to "fool god" - employing technical loopholes to get around bizarre restrictions.

For fux sake...If you have to jump through that many convoluted and draconian hoops trying to abide by an obsolete set of weird-ass stone-age "rules"...Just give the hell up, already.
 
2013-04-12 01:49:56 AM
It's weird and makes no sense, but at least you know he won't be having a conversation with you trying to convert you to his faith like I have overheard on planes (but not personally been subjected to). Nor does he appear to encroach on the next seat over.

There is a yarmulke on the man in the next seat, so they're probably flying together, so they are probably from the same temple. One would think that if you asked your Rabbi, he'd give the same answer to both of you. Unless it's a joke on bag-guy.
 
2013-04-12 02:02:30 AM
 
2013-04-12 02:06:05 AM
FTA: Pre-punched holes in the plastic are said to invalidate the barrier

So how are they supposed to breathe?

FTA: Only if when the kohein is putting on this bag it accidentally rips can there be some leniency,

Oh, another 'work-around'.

/stupid
 
2013-04-12 02:23:43 AM
That reminds me....I have to pick up my dry cleaning tomorrow.
 
2013-04-12 02:32:24 AM

The_Sponge: That reminds me....I have to pick up my dry cleaning tomorrow.


You have your rabbis dry cleaned? I prefer wash and wear.
 
2013-04-12 02:34:51 AM

ecmoRandomNumbers: The_Sponge: That reminds me....I have to pick up my dry cleaning tomorrow.

You have your rabbis dry cleaned? I prefer wash and wear.



Lulz.
 
2013-04-12 02:37:12 AM

Confabulat: Eh people are filthy. I can see the point.


This.

Vitamin C, Zinc and Airborne just aren't cutting it anymore. Planes are essentially compressed air petri dishes. Graveyard flyover or not, this man is wise.
 
2013-04-12 02:56:27 AM

nmrsnr: MadSkillz: Well I'm really good that one person gets to speak for all of them.

He doesn't, that was representative, how many links would you like?

Kohenim are prohibited from coming into contact with dead bodies, and many rabbis have taken the strict opinion that a Kohen may not ride in a plane if he knows ahead of time that it will fly directly over a Jewish cemetery. Many have ruled that if does not know of the flight plan, he may ride in the airplane.

Consequently·, this diminishes the extent of the problem of flying over a cemetery, since the overwhelming majority of [the cemeteries] will not be Jewish.

The main solution was to fly on other flights that don't use that specific route. Other solutions, including some that were extremely sensationalist, included enclosing oneself in a body bag of sorts to prevent being affected by the impurity. Others held it was not a problem, as they held being in the plane flying overhead prevents the impurity from affecting them.

Do you need more?


It's "piety creep," a. k. a. "holier than thou."  Originally, kohen could not touch the dead.  Then they couldn't be in an enclosed space with the dead (such as a plane). Then they had to be buried X feet from non-kohen dead, but a fence or hedgerow Y feet tall reduced X by some feet.  Now piety creep extends to the ludicrous heights of air travel, and the plastic bag is just symbolic of the kohen's determination to remain undefiled.
 
2013-04-12 03:04:29 AM
Jew gotta be kidding me!
 
2013-04-12 03:18:01 AM
God is totally tricked by that bag.
 
2013-04-12 03:18:04 AM
It's not a tumah!
 
2013-04-12 03:18:08 AM
s-ak.buzzfed.com
 
2013-04-12 03:18:14 AM
 
2013-04-12 03:21:50 AM
Obsession with Circumnavigating the Dead.
 
2013-04-12 03:21:54 AM

MaxxLarge: In "Religuous," Bill Maher put together  a whole segment specifically dedicated to the myriad of ways Orthodox Jews try to "fool god" - employing technical loopholes to get around bizarre restrictions.

For fux sake...If you have to jump through that many convoluted and draconian hoops trying to abide by an obsolete set of weird-ass stone-age "rules"...Just give the hell up, already.


Said the serpent.

/devils advocate... wait, no...
 
2013-04-12 03:22:29 AM
Serious Daily Mail readers will no doubt now be wrapping themselves in the Thatcher tribute edition before flying over her grave
 
2013-04-12 03:22:41 AM
We cannot stop the Orthodox Jews in New York from performing fellatio on newborns they've just circumcised even though the infants sometimes die of herpes or develop learning disabilities from their brains becoming infected because the practice is a religious rite.

We have to respect the 10% of the Israeli population we're subsidizing who refuse to work and have an average of 8 children because they have been called upon to study the Torah and working would taint that studying.

We have to respect American journalists who Photoshop our Secretary of State out of an important picture because the image of a woman is offensive to a religious tradition.

And we have to respect a person's right to suffocate themselves in a ziploc bag because a breathing hole would take away from the 5,000 year-old religious tradition of not flying in a 20th century flying machine without covering yourself in an unbreathable material also invented in the 20th century.

This is just mass mental illness that happens to have a constitutional amendment protecting its lunacy.
 
2013-04-12 03:24:04 AM
Uhhh...how does he breathe?  Not that I'm at all concerned for the nutbag.
 
2013-04-12 03:24:11 AM

squibbits: It's not a tumah!


Came here for this.
 
2013-04-12 03:24:29 AM
Plastic won't shield you from impurities/dead.  A toilet seat cover on his seat would do just fine.
 
mjg
2013-04-12 03:25:35 AM
Dutch Oven Immolation
 
2013-04-12 03:27:25 AM
It's obviously auto-erotic asphyxiation. I do it all the time on long flights.
 
2013-04-12 03:30:30 AM

swingerofbirches: We cannot stop the Orthodox Jews in New York from performing fellatio on newborns they've just circumcised even though the infants sometimes die of herpes or develop learning disabilities from their brains becoming infected because the practice is a religious rite.

We have to respect the 10% of the Israeli population we're subsidizing who refuse to work and have an average of 8 children because they have been called upon to study the Torah and working would taint that studying.

We have to respect American journalists who Photoshop our Secretary of State out of an important picture because the image of a woman is offensive to a religious tradition.

And we have to respect a person's right to suffocate themselves in a ziploc bag because a breathing hole would take away from the 5,000 year-old religious tradition of not flying in a 20th century flying machine without covering yourself in an unbreathable material also invented in the 20th century.

This is just mass mental illness that happens to have a constitutional amendment protecting its lunacy.


...I...

never mind.
 
2013-04-12 03:30:46 AM
FTFA:'Kohanim have a duty to protect their taharah, purity,' according to the article. 'They have been bestowed with extra kedushah which makes them worth of being meshorsei Hashem. At times, there may be extra demands made upon them in order to maintain that standard of kedushah and taharah.'

Well shiat, that explains everything.
 
2013-04-12 03:31:26 AM

Lsherm: MadSkillz: That's just farking stupid.

Orthodoxy Religion in any form usually leads to stupidity.  The rules overtake the intent.  In this case, though, could this be fake?


FTFY

/Wouldn't be surprised if real.  Farking religion.
 
2013-04-12 03:31:51 AM

doglover: the man is a Kohein, religious descendant of the priests of ancient Israel, who are banned from flying over cemeteries.

That's a pretty specific ban from the ancient past.


and just how long ago could that be?

last i read, red sea pedestrians weren't flying anytime before the wright brothers,
 
2013-04-12 03:32:32 AM

MaxxLarge: In "Religuous," Bill Maher put together  a whole segment specifically dedicated to the myriad of ways Orthodox Jews try to "fool god" - employing technical loopholes to get around bizarre restrictions.

For fux sake...If you have to jump through that many convoluted and draconian hoops trying to abide by an obsolete set of weird-ass stone-age "rules"...Just give the hell up, already.


Religulous was my first thought, too. That kind of religious lawyering is neurotic, even for Jews.
 
2013-04-12 03:33:26 AM
I think he's just doing it so he can huff his own farts.
 
2013-04-12 03:35:14 AM

Elegy: FTFA:'Kohanim have a duty to protect their taharah, purity,' according to the article. 'They have been bestowed with extra kedushah which makes them worth of being meshorsei Hashem. At times, there may be extra demands made upon them in order to maintain that standard of kedushah and taharah.'

Well shiat, that explains everything.


it does.
it means that they must at times, act like idiots to demonstrate their difference from non-idiots.
 
2013-04-12 03:42:15 AM
FTA:  'Kohanim have a duty to protect their taharah, purity,' according to the article. 'They have been bestowed with extra kedushah which makes them worth of being meshorsei Hashem. At times, there may be extra demands made upon them in order to maintain that standard of kedushah and taharah.'

gezundheit!
 
2013-04-12 03:44:00 AM
Giant ziploks are wasteful.

They should have an in-flight crisper drawer to keep their rabbis fresh.

(Unless they're marinating the rabbi, in which case the ziplock makes sense)
 
2013-04-12 03:49:08 AM
I assume the baggie is blessed, since the baggie blocks the impurity which can pass through the plane's metal, glass, plastic, carbon fiber, etc. Would the same protection also be provided by blessing the entire plane, or the individual's clothes?
 
2013-04-12 03:50:27 AM

Notabunny: I assume the baggie is blessed, since the baggie blocks the impurity which can pass through the plane's metal, glass, plastic, carbon fiber, etc. Would the same protection also be provided by blessing the entire plane, or the individual's clothes?


because it's a freezer baggie, with the "yellow and blue make green" closure.
 
2013-04-12 03:53:09 AM

swingerofbirches: This is just mass mental illness that happens to have a constitutional amendment protecting its lunacy.


The US Constitution doesn't have any authority over Israel, and doesn't say anything about brand new fabricated Jewish rituals that even Orthodox Judaism has never heard of.

This guy isn't hurting anyone, but I wouldn't want to share an enclosed space with someone who intentionally refuses to act rationally to such a degree.

Imagine how he would react if understood that there have been humans buried randomly throughout the ground on nearly every continent, especially the Middle East and Europe.  The entire planet is one big graveyard.  A former king of England was recently dug up out of a parking lot.
 
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