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(Denver Post)   Marijuana makes you forget things, like returning library books. So one state where weed is legal is now proposing DNA swabs for library scofflaws   (denverpost.com ) divider line
    More: Stupid  
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2822 clicks; posted to Main » on 11 Apr 2013 at 9:59 AM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



46 Comments     (+0 »)
 
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2013-04-11 10:03:34 AM  
www.law.wisc.edu
Approves.
 
2013-04-11 10:04:20 AM  
That is what bookmarks are for.
 
2013-04-11 10:06:18 AM  
And by DNA swab, he means Transvaginal Ultrasound on himself in a bag.

extras.mnginteractive.com
 
2013-04-11 10:06:30 AM  
Tropic of Cancer?
 
2013-04-11 10:06:50 AM  
I cannot foresee any abuses of this whatsoever...

24.media.tumblr.com
 
2013-04-11 10:08:01 AM  
"This encroaches on an individual's privacy," said Maes, who will offer testimony on Thursday in opposition to the bill. "Further, listen carefully to the rationale supporting this bill: 'Collecting DNA helps solve crime.' There is no end to this mission. One may facetiously say 'just chip us at birth,' but in reality this is precisely where the rationale of the proponents naturally leads us to."

bunbunmaru.com
 
2013-04-11 10:08:35 AM  
If people are taking books without library cards, I might suggest administering a few fatal beatings.
 
2013-04-11 10:12:11 AM  
Wait, libraries are still a thing?

/Used to rent movies from local library when younger
//Now I read all the Farking time
 
2013-04-11 10:13:17 AM  
Operating a barber shop without a license will get your DNA taken?

Jesus Christ, I know there are many of you who love encouraging governmental power, but this is completely idiotic
 
2013-04-11 10:15:38 AM  

cman: Operating a barber shop without a license will get your DNA taken?

Jesus Christ, I know there are many of you who love encouraging governmental power, but this is completely idiotic


Ok, just fingerprints and background checks. If they can want it for an actual constitutional right, why not this?
 
2013-04-11 10:19:26 AM  

Neondion: Wait, libraries are still a thing?

/Used to rent movies from local library when younger
//Now I read all the Farking time


A lot of libraries are stocking up on ebooks, which is pretty sweet. I don't want to spend $15 on a nonfiction ebook that I'll read once, and the blue-hairs that go to my library generally don't know what ebooks are, so a lot of times it's easier to borrow from the library on my Kindle than it is to actually go to the library itself.

Best part is, ebooks return themselves. No late fees, ever.
 
2013-04-11 10:30:38 AM  
Just as stupid as the library card thing, the following "crimes" would also require DNA sample submission: practicing hairstyling, pedicures, etc. without a cosmetology license; practicing "athletic training" without a license. THANK  GOD. We're finally going right to the root causes of societal problems rather than merely dealing with symptoms such as Rape, Arson, Pedophelia and Embezzlement.

And from TFA:

In what's billed as an ambitious effort to solve cold cases, exonerate those wrongfully convicted and quell future crimes...

No farking way this will lead to anyone being exonerated. If someone is already in prison with a wrongful conviction, how are they going to be out committing library book theft? If someone is being charged with a more serious crime and DNA evidence is available, that person is already going to be submitting a DNA sample anyway (only to probably have it disregarded because it doesn't help the prosecution's case).
 
2013-04-11 10:31:46 AM  

Jubeebee: Neondion: Wait, libraries are still a thing?

/Used to rent movies from local library when younger
//Now I read all the Farking time

A lot of libraries are stocking up on ebooks, which is pretty sweet. I don't want to spend $15 on a nonfiction ebook that I'll read once, and the blue-hairs that go to my library generally don't know what ebooks are, so a lot of times it's easier to borrow from the library on my Kindle than it is to actually go to the library itself.

Best part is, ebooks return themselves. No late fees, ever.


I am kind of weird in that I read an ebook, (acquired either legally or otherwise) and if I like the book then I buy it paper/hardback.  I am hoping to have a pretty substantial library in my den/mancave someday.

/Yes there are already leather-bound books
//Still working on the Rich Mahogany
 
2013-04-11 10:34:38 AM  
they want to know whether or not you use das evilll marijuana you scofflaws!
 
2013-04-11 10:48:03 AM  
Well, its not like students ever smoke pot or anything....
 
2013-04-11 10:59:41 AM  
Give me absolute control
Over every living soul.
Now lie beside me baby,
That's an order.
 
2013-04-11 11:00:35 AM  
Colorado continues Yinning while Kansas Yangs.
 
gja
2013-04-11 11:01:45 AM  
Full-tilt-boogie-derpoid-retard.
 
2013-04-11 11:09:43 AM  
extras.mnginteractive.comupload.wikimedia.org
 
2013-04-11 11:34:46 AM  
LIbrary patron 210837:  Your copy of "Dirty Nellie Does Dubuque" is six hours overdue.  Return to the collection kiosk.  You have thirty seconds to comply.
 
2013-04-11 11:41:16 AM  
CSB: I used to work in a library.  We had a little old lady who always went into the Children's section and checked out "Nancy Drew" and "Hardy Boys" books. I guess she liked them and wanted to finish them all before she died.  No big deal.

The problem was, the lady absolutely reeked of cigarette smoke.  You could smell her coming up the stairs. She would take the books home, and when they returned they would also smell strongly of smoke, to the point that we had to put dryer sheets between the pages.  It didn't work, and you can't febreeze a book, so eventually the entire collection stank of stale cigarette smoke.  Nobody other than the old lady even went near the books again, and eventually that corner of the library just took on a permanent odor.

So now I'm imagining a similar old lady who smokes not tobacco, but marijuana.  And little kids asking "mommy, what's that smell?" as they're opening Book 3 of the Box Car Children, having just come from a library Children's section that smells like a Jimmy Buffett concert.

Which ends my CSB and brings up a question: Does being high make the intro to "Reading Rainbow" better?
 
2013-04-11 11:43:08 AM  
We'd solve a hell of a lot more cold cases if we had a comprehensive DNA database on everyone, but we kinda decided we didn't like that idea.  I guess this guy didn't get that memo.
 
2013-04-11 11:48:48 AM  

Kibbler: LIbrary patron 210837:  Your copy of "Dirty Nellie Does Dubuque" is six hours overdue.  Return to the collection kiosk.  You have thirty seconds to comply.


So weird. I just finished reading a case called Teamsters v. Dubuque, I pop on over to Fark and you had this post.

Eeeeeerrrrriiiiieeee.

Scared now.
 
2013-04-11 11:49:58 AM  
and so it begins. When DNA sampling was started(at least, here in NJ) it was PROMISED that A) all samples would be destroyed 7 years after the person's probation/parole was up. That was a lie, it's still there. B) DA's would only want it to be taken from CONVICTED felons. That too was a lie, as this article clearly shows.
while I'm all for locking up ACTIVELY felonious people, misdemeanor prosecutions shouldn't require all the lab work. They are backed up enough as it is.

how about the cops just do the job they are paid for and stop looking for lazy short cuts?
 
2013-04-11 12:01:42 PM  
DNA swabs for misdemeanors? Rep. Dan Pabon is an idiot.
 
2013-04-11 12:09:27 PM  
Came for Mr. Bookman. Leaving satisfied.
 
2013-04-11 12:09:36 PM  
Look, citizen, if you haven't done anything wrong, you've got absolutely nothing to worry about.

These requirements will only affect the criminals.
 
2013-04-11 12:22:41 PM  
I've got a question - Is it possible to copyright your own dna, and then not granting the government, or in this case, and independent lab, from accessing it?
 
2013-04-11 12:25:34 PM  

Endive Wombat: I've got a question - Is it possible to copyright your own dna, and then not granting the government, or in this case, and independent lab, from accessing it?


Interesting question, but I don't think submitting your DNA to the feds at the Library of Congress is a move twowards privacy protections from the government.
 
2013-04-11 12:28:44 PM  
Face it.  The ultimate goal here is to eventually take DNA samples from everyone, so let's just start swabbing newborns at the hospital.

Ridiculous you say? I seem to recall a time when you didn't need a Social Security number until you started working.  When my last child was born, the hospital administrator did the application as part of the discharge paperwork . . .
 
2013-04-11 12:35:50 PM  
People still go to libraries?!
 
2013-04-11 12:39:11 PM  

neutronstar: People still go to libraries?!


Bums, to take sink showers and use/abuse the clean facilities.
Child Predators, because Children.
Little old Ladies, checking out Harlequin Romance Novels
Cops, checking out the Child Predators and Bums
Autistic people, to sit and stare and enjoy the silence
Mechanics, looking at the Reference section's 1987 copy of the Ford Autoparts Catalogue
Retards, who want to check out books about puppies, elvis, wrestlers, and monster trucks

You get a healthy mix.
 
2013-04-11 01:11:38 PM  
Next step: zealous cops using the DNA database to frame suspects facilitate justice. Just need a lab tech you got some dirt on, with access to a DNA sequencer.

You become a "person of interest", and they'll find DNA samples of you everywhere: in the victim's home, on the victim's underwear, etc. The evidence will be utterly indisputable, because it involves science and stuff.

Weasel your way out of the one, serfs!
 
2013-04-11 01:27:08 PM  

neutronstar: People still go to libraries?!


They are great. Each summer ours has a summer reading program where kids can read to earn tickets to a baseball game. I've taken my daughters for 8 or so years, now. They read during the summer (when it is blazing hot here in Arizona), I get some quiet time (I will read with them as well) and we get to see a ballgame.

But forget that- libraries are a great resource. They have books, dvds, cds, ebooks, and on and on. Great resource.
 
2013-04-11 01:27:10 PM  

Lawyers With Nukes: Next step: zealous cops using the DNA database to frame suspects facilitate justice. Just need a lab tech you got some dirt on, with access to a DNA sequencer.

You become a "person of interest", and they'll find DNA samples of you everywhere: in the victim's home, on the victim's underwear, etc. The evidence will be utterly indisputable, because it involves science and stuff.

Weasel your way out of the one, serfs!


Or:

1) Go to the home of the individual you want to frame with a clean DNA cotton swab.
2) Apply swab to garbage can, door knob, whatever's easiest.
3) Go to crime scene with DNA-laden swab.
4) Turn in swab as "DNA taken from crime scene"

My way doesn't involve extortion or a trip to the state crime lab.
 
2013-04-11 01:36:58 PM  
To prevent a DNA swab from being taken for just a misdemeanor: Have the jack booted thugs make a factual list of the crimes that you are suspected of doing and then place charges against you for those crimes, and then the Judge at your trial can decide if a sample needs to be taken, otherwise tell them to f*ck off.


/The DNA data base is growing, so don't be a victim of it.

//You are a victim since they no longer are doing a '100% match to the perp' DNA tests. They do a test that will point out the DNA of 20 people, who are then interrogated to see if they are innocent.

///Cost/time cutting is a crime to justice.
 
2013-04-11 04:08:08 PM  

another cultural observer: Lawyers With Nukes: Next step: zealous cops using the DNA database to frame suspects facilitate justice. Just need a lab tech you got some dirt on, with access to a DNA sequencer.

You become a "person of interest", and they'll find DNA samples of you everywhere: in the victim's home, on the victim's underwear, etc. The evidence will be utterly indisputable, because it involves science and stuff.

Weasel your way out of the one, serfs!

Or:

1) Go to the home of the individual you want to frame with a clean DNA cotton swab.
2) Apply swab to garbage can, door knob, whatever's easiest.
3) Go to crime scene with DNA-laden swab.
4) Turn in swab as "DNA taken from crime scene"

My way doesn't involve extortion or a trip to the state crime lab.


My way doesn't even involve access to the original physical sample! Just get access to the DNA database (easy), run the sequence (easy), copy all you want with PCR (easiest of all)...bingo bango, automatic conviction, onto the next political opponent scumbag.
 
2013-04-11 04:23:24 PM  
dbr.nu
 
2013-04-11 05:15:54 PM  

sheep snorter: To prevent a DNA swab from being taken for just a misdemeanor: Have the jack booted thugs make a factual list of the crimes that you are suspected of doing and then place charges against you for those crimes, and then the Judge at your trial can decide if a sample needs to be taken, otherwise tell them to f*ck off.


/The DNA data base is growing, so don't be a victim of it.

//You are a victim since they no longer are doing a '100% match to the perp' DNA tests. They do a test that will point out the DNA of 20 people, who are then interrogated to see if they are innocent.

///Cost/time cutting is a crime to justice.


OTOH, it beats interrogating every black male within 50 miles.  The cost/time cutting benefits the innocent, too.
 
2013-04-11 05:20:31 PM  

Jubeebee: Neondion: Wait, libraries are still a thing?

/Used to rent movies from local library when younger
//Now I read all the Farking time

A lot of libraries are stocking up on ebooks, which is pretty sweet. I don't want to spend $15 on a nonfiction ebook that I'll read once, and the blue-hairs that go to my library generally don't know what ebooks are, so a lot of times it's easier to borrow from the library on my Kindle than it is to actually go to the library itself.

Best part is, ebooks return themselves. No late fees, ever.


I still check out ebooks from a library system I'm 1000 miles away from.  IDK when my card number expires. Nobody's going to check my current address unless I don't "return" a book.  And the DRM is easily stripped off.
 
2013-04-11 05:40:02 PM  
While people quibble over the difference between misdemeanor and felony convictions, the SCOTUS is considering whether cops can forcibly take DNA from mere arrestees who've been convicted of nothing.  The feds and  more than 30 states already have laws permitting this.
 
2013-04-11 05:49:42 PM  

BarkingUnicorn: While people quibble over the difference between misdemeanor and felony convictions, the SCOTUS is considering whether cops can forcibly take DNA from mere arrestees who've been convicted of nothing.  The feds and  more than 30 states already have laws permitting this.


Wow. I hope SCOTUS smacks that shiat down. No probable cause in a murder case? Just shop his photo around in other cases where he just might "fit the description".
 
2013-04-11 08:31:30 PM  

Harvey Manfrenjensenjen: BarkingUnicorn: While people quibble over the difference between misdemeanor and felony convictions, the SCOTUS is considering whether cops can forcibly take DNA from mere arrestees who've been convicted of nothing.  The feds and  more than 30 states already have laws permitting this.

Wow. I hope SCOTUS smacks that shiat down. No probable cause in a murder case? Just shop his photo around in other cases where he just might "fit the description".


The Feds already treat misdemeanors which carry sentences of longer than 1 year as felonies.  Even if the defendants are given probation.  Arrested for 2nd offense OWI?  Congrats, you're considered a felon for federal sentencing purposes.
 
2013-04-11 08:47:16 PM  
another cultural observer: Harvey Manfrenjensenjen: BarkingUnicorn: While people quibble over the difference between misdemeanor and felony convictions, the SCOTUS is considering whether cops can forcibly take DNA from mere arrestees who've been convicted of nothing.  The feds and  more than 30 states already have laws permitting this.

Wow. I hope SCOTUS smacks that shiat down. No probable cause in a murder case? Just shop his photo around in other cases where he just might "fit the description".

The Feds already treat misdemeanors which carry sentences of longer than 1 year as felonies.  Even if the defendants are given probation.   Arrested Convicted for 2nd offense OWI?  Congrats, you're considered a felon for federal sentencing purposes.


FTFM
 
2013-04-12 02:49:00 AM  

cman: Operating a barber shop without a license will get your DNA taken?

Jesus Christ, I know there are many of you who love encouraging governmental power, but this is completely idiotic


When someone commits a misdemeanor, aren't their fingerprints taken?  How is taking their DNA any different?
 
2013-04-12 09:49:15 AM  

offmymeds: [dbr.nu image 303x509]


I spaced out to the vinyl of "A Child's Garden of Grass" many times after stumbling upon it once.

Thanks Youtube!  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mtupT_dFxGc
 
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