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(Daily Mail)   Exhausted, sleep deprived mother of premature twins lashes out at "Breastapo" for making her feel guilty, selfish and lazy for supplementing formula for breastmilk   (dailymail.co.uk) divider line 44
    More: Hero, sleep deprivation, other mother, profiteers, Dannon, recipes, supermarkets, twin daughters  
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11424 clicks; posted to Main » on 11 Apr 2013 at 10:15 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-04-11 10:52:39 AM  
8 votes:
A guy I worked was in the grocery line buying formula for his young-un. The lady behind him started going on about how breast milk is soooo much better for the baby. He turned around an looked her in the eye and said "My wife just died...thanks."

He said the color ran out of her face after that remark.

/No woman actually died in this story
2013-04-11 10:27:11 AM  
8 votes:

God Is My Co-Pirate: I'd just like to take this moment to give a special "fark you" to the old crone who came up to me while I was with my daughter in a café and hissed, "I hope that's breast milk in that bottle."


Respond with, "Me too... I found the bottle on the floor of the bus on the ride over..."
2013-04-11 11:31:24 AM  
5 votes:

busy chillin': trotsky: I would have went all internet tough guy on them. Unless I'm feeding my kid a beer with a nipple attached, STFU.

All I would say is it better be a hop bomb; Double IPAs help 'em sleep.


When my older son was about 18 months old, he suddenly became very interested in my beer. For those of you who don't have kids, at that age, they look all discombobulated and toddler-y, but can move like ninjas if you're not ever vigilant and there's something they want. Especially if it's something they shouldn't have.

So, if I got up to pee while watching a ballgame, and didn't remember to put my glass somewhere high, I'd come back to the lad trying to down a pint.

Then I got smart. I bought a super hop-bombed IPA, poured myself a glass, and waited. Sure enough, the kid swiped my glass and took himself a huge drink. I was able to grab the glass before he dropped it, and the look of betrayal on his face was priceless. It broke him of that behavior, immediately.
2013-04-11 11:13:32 AM  
5 votes:
Sheesh, it's just formula. It's not like she was vaccinating the kid.
2013-04-11 10:19:38 AM  
5 votes:

God Is My Co-Pirate: I'd just like to take this moment to give a special "fark you" to the old crone who came up to me while I was with my daughter in a café and hissed, "I hope that's breast milk in that bottle."


"Why no, it's Prestone."
2013-04-11 11:41:17 AM  
3 votes:

MyKingdomForYourHorse: I just shot milk out my nose


I hope that was breast milk and not formula, bub.
2013-04-11 10:23:01 AM  
3 votes:

God Is My Co-Pirate: I'd just like to take this moment to give a special "fark you" to the old crone who came up to me while I was with my daughter in a café and hissed, "I hope that's breast milk in that bottle."


You should have said that benadryl dissolves easier in formula.
2013-04-11 08:47:31 AM  
3 votes:
www.ifc.com
2013-04-11 12:17:27 PM  
2 votes:

God Is My Co-Pirate: I'd just like to take this moment to give a special "fark you" to the old crone who came up to me while I was with my daughter in a café and hissed, "I hope that's breast milk in that bottle."


The proper retort is, "I hope that's organic sand in your vagina."
2013-04-11 12:08:31 PM  
2 votes:
After the birth,

YOU HAD ONE JOB
2013-04-11 10:53:52 AM  
2 votes:

Cortez the Killer: A guy I worked was in the grocery line buying formula for his young-un. The lady behind him started going on about how breast milk is soooo much better for the baby. He turned around an looked her in the eye and said "My wife just died...thanks."

He said the color ran out of her face after that remark.

/No woman actually died in this story


A guy I worked with....I'm straight, I swear!
2013-04-11 10:45:27 AM  
2 votes:

dahmers love zombie: stonicus: God Is My Co-Pirate: I'd just like to take this moment to give a special "fark you" to the old crone who came up to me while I was with my daughter in a café and hissed, "I hope that's breast milk in that bottle."

Respond with, "Me too... I found the bottle on the floor of the bus on the ride over..."

Or, "As long as the airport security guards think it is, Allah willing"...


HA!

Also a WTF to the lactation consultant who told me off for supplementing with formula, saying very snottily, "You do realize that will make her sleep more, don't you?"

Lady, don't tempt me. She hadn't slept, unless held upright in my arms, for six straight weeks. I had bleeding nipples and PPD. I was this close to selling her to the gypsies.
2013-04-11 10:38:16 AM  
2 votes:
If the Lord had intended breastfeeding in public, He wouldn't have made it a sin.
2013-04-11 10:31:45 AM  
2 votes:
www.funnyphotos.net.au

iwidk.com
2013-04-11 10:21:23 AM  
2 votes:

Altair: Could someone explain this nonsense to a 30 yr old stoner with no kids?  Please don't make me Google breast feeding news.


People who are better and smarter than other people are sometimes so munificent that they will take time out of their busy lives to coach and encourage their less intelligent and awesome peers (if you could even call them that) as to how they should be living their lives.

For some reason, people view this with scorn and offence; they should really be thanking their magnanimous betters. I guess that's what you get when you point out some Plebeians' failures to them.
2013-04-11 10:19:54 AM  
2 votes:
Ooo! A HERO! Stop everything! Give her the farking Congressional Medal!
2013-04-11 10:03:09 AM  
2 votes:
images3.wikia.nocookie.net

This is the only time I've ever felt the need to tell another woman how she should breastfeed her child. People need to mind their own business.
2013-04-11 09:56:32 AM  
2 votes:
I would just beat those La Leche League Milk Mafia types to death with my formula bottle. If the bottle doesn't kill them the irony hopefully will.

There needs to be a comedy movie about this.
2013-04-11 10:41:44 PM  
1 votes:

what_now: Cybernetic: what_now: When I was in a Wal Mart in Central Florida (let that sink in for a while) a woman with three filthy children started talking to me. My friend, who was one of those "Awww...babies" types, asked how old the littlest one was. Answer. 8 months. I asked what was in the bottle. Answer: root beer.

So you know. Worse thinks that formula

Just out of curiosity, do you remember where the Walmart was?

/Central Floridian.

Ocala.


You went to Ocala on purpose? Were you buying a horse? It's the only thing I can think of to do in Ocala.
2013-04-11 07:11:52 PM  
1 votes:

HortusMatris: [farm9.staticflickr.com image 374x500]


i2.kym-cdn.com
2013-04-11 05:57:05 PM  
1 votes:

MeanJean: You shouldn't pick on someone for being fat because there might be a whole host of medical problems making them fat that you don't know about, and they might not be able to help it, just like some non-breastfeeding mothers may not be able to breastfeed. So who the fark are you to judge anyone?

To put it another way, mind your own farking business about other people's bodies.


Could you move a little to one side? I'm trying to see the thread. Thanks.
2013-04-11 02:41:23 PM  
1 votes:
Then I got smart. I bought a super hop-bombed IPA, poured myself a glass, and waited. Sure enough, the kid swiped my glass and took himself a huge drink. I was able to grab the glass before he dropped it, and the look of betrayal on his face was priceless. It broke him of that behavior, immediately.
You know, you took a big risk. By age 8, the poor kid could be living in Portland, growing a full beard, driving a VW Golf, playing fretless in a garage band, dating some chick who doesn't shave her legs, and working as a php programmer at some startup. Is that what you want for your son?
2013-04-11 02:05:13 PM  
1 votes:

mesmer242: kiwimoogle84: CapeFearCadaver: kiwimoogle84: she

CSS- I was actually told the other day that I shouldn't have my baby shower too far in advance from my due date, in case she dies after the shower in utero, so it's "not embarrassing" and "gifts don't go to waste." I was absolutely appalled. This was a family friend I was inviting to said shower. I screamed how effing dare you right in her ear and hung up on her. Worst thing I ever heard in my life.

/endrant

Oh, dude. That's not a family friend, that's a family frenemy. I'm glad you used your pregnancy hormones for their intended purpose.

/also knocked up
//so glad I don't have to suffer through a baby shower this time around


I'm having two- a fun party with my sacrilegious friends, and a separate monotonous one for the Mormon relatives and stuffy adults. First kid though, so I'm not going to turn down showers and gifts. Congrats to you too!

This lady is so never coming into my presence ever again if I can help it. She's the kind of woman who would walk up to you and say something like "I see you have horrible acne, I can suggest products to help." You just DON'T SAY CRAP LIKE THAT. Something in her brain is broken.

And yeah, I kind of see her screwed up logic since she had a stillborn once, but I seriously wish I had the presence of mind to say "well then don't send your kid to school with a lunch tomorrow, because he could be run over by a bus and you don't want that lunch going to waste!"

/why do people suck
2013-04-11 01:49:04 PM  
1 votes:

HortusMatris: [farm9.staticflickr.com image 374x500]


That is the best photo ever taken.
2013-04-11 12:43:58 PM  
1 votes:

God Is My Co-Pirate: Also a WTF to the lactation consultant who told me off for supplementing with formula, saying very snottily, "You do realize that will make her sleep more, don't you?"


For our first child, my wife saw several consultants.  Our son wouldn't latch and when he did, he couldn't seem to get anything.  The consultant tells her to try to pump and after several attempts (over a couple of days) I couldn't take watching her writhe in pain while only producing a few drops.  We thanked the consultant for her time and told her we decided on formula.


For our second child, we knew that there was no chance of breast feeding.  As soon as the epidural wore off, I told everyone in the room to GTFO and I surprised my wife by pulling a bottle of champagne out of my overnight bag.  My wife (who dabbles in photography ) took the coolest picture of our champagne flutes being "clinked" together directly over our daughter who was lying on the bed and had just grabbed on to a finger of the hand holding the glass.


My wife was very calm about not being able to breast feed.  Problem is that it meant I no longer had a designated driver and my wife was VERY quick to remind me of every time she drove my inebriated ass home.  She also would point out that I am now HER taxi service.


That sucked.
2013-04-11 12:30:46 PM  
1 votes:

doubled99: After the birth,

YOU HAD ONE JOB


And that one job is to feed the baby.
2013-04-11 11:54:58 AM  
1 votes:

mesmer242: mama2tnt: theorellior:  but when the teeth come in, isn't that nature's way of saying, "Hey! Feed me REAL food now!"?

Yes, which is why most people start solid foods in addition to breastmilk/formula around then. But babies aren't capable of getting enough calories just through solid foods until later. And the consistency of breastmilk doesn't stay the same over time... it becomes more watery as the baby gets older. Babies need water in addition to nutrients, but giving them just water before they're a year risks water intoxication. It's not like people who use formula stop at six months when the baby gets teeth either.

Most kids bite once after they get teeth, get startled by the reaction and then don't do it again. My kiddo did that around six months like normal. Then around 15 months she wanted to wean so she started biting AND trying to grab for a milk bottle so I knew it was time. Fine by me.


After my babbys got teeth, I just started throwing raw meat between the bars of their cage. That seemed to work.
2013-04-11 11:45:26 AM  
1 votes:
Breastapo?

"Show zem ve have vays of making zem talk." "Heil Titler!"

/jawohl, mein boobenführer
2013-04-11 11:38:57 AM  
1 votes:

theorellior: mama2tnt: but when the teeth come in, isn't that nature's way of saying, "Hey! Feed me REAL food now!"?

You'd think, but hormones don't think.


I just shot milk out my nose
2013-04-11 11:33:30 AM  
1 votes:
I want nothing to do with children, but since I had a breast reduction (best decision I ever made) and various lumps taken out of my breasts, I no longer have the plumbing to make breastmilk (which is awesome in my book, but that's me).  If someone makes snide comments to you, I would just say, very loudly, "Since I had to have a double mastectomy to beat my breast cancer, I cannot physically breastfeed.  Do you make a career out of harassing cancer survivors?"  So what if it's a lie?  Just knock them down a few pegs.  What you feed your kid is your business and nobody else's.
2013-04-11 11:30:54 AM  
1 votes:

what_now: When I was in a Wal Mart in Central Florida (let that sink in for a while)


Yeah - Christ, was that your community service sentence or something?
2013-04-11 11:19:31 AM  
1 votes:
my children 5 and 7 were on formula from the day they were born, my wife never wanted to breast feed. guess what boob feeder nazi's, both are prefectly healthy, both very intelligent, my daughter is actually ahead of her year for school, both have slept whole nights from about 3 months on. Stop trying to make women feel bad for using formula, you are not all earth mommas driving vw buses, we knew slamming jack and coke the night you got pregnant
2013-04-11 11:14:23 AM  
1 votes:
Because breast feeding laws are totally the same as the secret police who helped round up and exterminate six million Jews.
2013-04-11 11:06:44 AM  
1 votes:
Feed yer baby's whatever the hell you want.  Unless yer vegan, because babies starving to death makes me all stabby.  I raised my youngest on a steady diet of breast milk and meat, wife caught me feeding him bbq beef ribs before he had more than 2 teeth, had him teething on pork ribs.  Boy has got a lot of muscle for a 9 year old and almost no fat.  I would say the experiment was a success.
2013-04-11 10:53:41 AM  
1 votes:

octopied: I don't go on the net and read columns daily about "Breastfeed all the time, you terrible mom", and have never heard it come up in public


It's not said in exactly those words, but in a "peer-pressure/bullying/guilting" way.

You take vulnerable, scared people who want the absolute best for their child, bombard them with the message that "breast is best" and list all the wonderful benefits of breast milk vs formula, and add in people who cannot talk about formula without snearing, and you've got "Breastfeed all the time, you terrible mom"

It's like the organisations that are in charge of pushing breast feeding are afraid that if they admit that formula happens, then no one will breast feed at all.

/no kids
//don't like seeing people in emotional distress because breast feeding isn't working out.
2013-04-11 10:39:33 AM  
1 votes:

Altair: Could someone explain this nonsense to a 30 yr old stoner with no kids?  Please don't make me Google breast feeding news.


People who don't have much going for them will define themselves by whatever they can do right and feel good about. For some people, it's model trains. For others, it's breastfeeding. For me, it's fixing computers. (I'm not good for much else.) Within each specialty, there's usually a vocal minority who only barely tolerate the existence of other people who either lack their "talent," or disagree vehemently about the specifics. (Ever see a blog rant about stupid old people that can't use computers? Or about dumb people who don't use keyboard shortcuts?)

Mostly it's insecurity - if somebody else disagrees with me on the best way to do XYZ, I could interpret that as disapproval on their part of the methods I've been using. (No, dude, a digital signal is a digital signal - gold plated connectors on a SPDIF don't matter.)

When kids are involved, it's just more personal. Fear's involved too. (A fight? What? How dare you question my abilities as a mother, I'm an excellent parent! It's YOUR KID'S FAULT!)

I suspect if more people were stoners, the world would be a better place. Keep on keepin' on.
2013-04-11 10:36:13 AM  
1 votes:

orbister: It beats me why anyone who could breast feed would chose formula. Breast is free and there's no faffing about with sterilisation, carrying stuff around, getting supplies and so on. That said, there are lots of perfectly good reasons for not being able to breast feed, and in those cases you're hardly going to let the kid starve to death.


sometimes the woman, who's been waiting 9 months to drink a beer or smoke a joint, just wants to unwind every once in a while without endangering baby.
2013-04-11 10:32:00 AM  
1 votes:

stonicus: God Is My Co-Pirate: I'd just like to take this moment to give a special "fark you" to the old crone who came up to me while I was with my daughter in a café and hissed, "I hope that's breast milk in that bottle."

Respond with, "Me too... I found the bottle on the floor of the bus on the ride over..."


Or, "As long as the airport security guards think it is, Allah willing"...
2013-04-11 10:21:30 AM  
1 votes:

noitsnot: "Why no, it's Prestone."


I was going to get rid of my keyboard anyway, but you owe me for the Kona.
2013-04-11 10:21:04 AM  
1 votes:
One of my friends is still dealing with guilt issues about breastfeeding, and her kid is almost 18 months. She was on FB worrying about her supply and I'm like, "Your snowflake is walking, talking and eating whatever she can stuff in her gob. It's about time to just put the titty away and get on with your life." Of course, I didn't actually post that comment.
2013-04-11 10:19:08 AM  
1 votes:
I almost throat punched the woman who came up when our son was born and threw down the guilt gauntlet to my wife for using formula.

Yes lady, my wife takes medication for her mental health and without that medication she might pose a danger to herself and others but because proven science on formula must be bunk she should threaten the health of herself and baby just to give my son breast milk.

Douche
2013-04-11 09:48:33 AM  
1 votes:

God Is My Co-Pirate: I'd just like to take this moment to give a special "fark you" to the old crone who came up to me while I was with my daughter in a café and hissed, "I hope that's breast milk in that bottle."


This is one of the situations in life where "go fark yourself, biatch" is not only an acceptable response, it's actually the preferred one.

What IS it with some people?  Yes, breast milk is better than formula, especially for the first few months.  But for fark's sake, there's a hundred different reasons why you might see a stranger giving formula to their kid.  And in the final analysis, guess what -- even if it's because they're being "selfish" -- it's none of your farking business!  Sure, if you see them diluting the formula with vodak, that might be worth a mention to the appropriate authorities, but "using baby formula" is not child abuse, and bothering a stranger (who may have a perfect medical reason for bottle feeding) about it is simply reprehensible.

My daughter breast-fed from my wife for quite a while.  My son weaned himself at 6 months.  Weaned HIMSELF.  So should my wife have intentionally withheld anything but breastmilk from a child who was so active, and growing so fast, that he simply needed more food?  And how would that be less "cruel" than formula feeding?

There are multiple sides to this issue. My sister in law's due date is in May.  She's already told us that she has no intention of breastfeeding because she doesn't want her stupid-looking fake titties to become "ugly".  My sister-in-law is an idiot who should have been sterilized at puberty, but that's a whole other issue.  At this moment in time, and for women in this culture, you can choose to bottle-feed, and it's "fine".  Not optimal, but "fine"  We don't get to insist that other people raise their children perfectly,  If so, Honey Boo Boo would be a reality CRIME show.

OK, done babbling.   Hopefully this will be an amusing thread.
2013-04-11 09:39:53 AM  
1 votes:
Could someone explain this nonsense to a 30 yr old stoner with no kids?  Please don't make me Google breast feeding news.
2013-04-11 09:32:14 AM  
1 votes:
I'd just like to take this moment to give a special "fark you" to the old crone who came up to me while I was with my daughter in a café and hissed, "I hope that's breast milk in that bottle."
 
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