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(BBC America)   Ten American habits that the British just don't understand. Of course, #1 on the list is such low-hanging fruit that it's not even worth mentioning in the headline   (bbcamerica.com) divider line 73
    More: Interesting, British, Americans, oral hygiene, salt and pepper, family friendly, Christmas cards, elderly woman  
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38898 clicks; posted to Main » on 10 Apr 2013 at 8:33 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Archived thread
2013-04-10 04:45:46 PM
11 votes:

bunner: Moo juice is the jazz.


Lord knows it's been making my bum-hole sound like a Louis Armstrong horn solo as of late.
2013-04-10 10:50:14 PM
9 votes:
img.ctrlv.in.s3.amazonaws.com
2013-04-10 10:01:06 PM
8 votes:

Maggie_Luna: I hate milk. It always tasted like ass. I think it very 'white' to drink milk for some reason. I am not white and seeing as most of the world does fine without milk drinkage if I ever have children they will abstain from it. I moved on to artificial 'milk' (almond or ohters).  I like cheese though so I must support milk production for yummy cheese. That said you will pour that, honey, sugar, or lemon in my tea when I am cold and gone. Ew.


I hate chicken. It always tasted like ass. I think it very 'black' to eat chicken for some reason. I am not black and seeing as most of the world does fine without chicken eating if I ever have children they will abstain from it. I moved on to artificial 'chicken' (tofu or rabbit).  I like eggs though so I must support chicken production for yummy eggs. That said you will pour that, gravy, in my ass when I am cold and gone. Ew.
2013-04-10 08:49:53 PM
7 votes:

Superrad: So, we eat a lot and are outgoing. Yep, that's America.


So at breakfast a couple weeks ago, my 9yo son whips off his shirt without saying a word and starts making armpit farts. I literally blew milk out my nose. I said I'd tried a hundred times as a kid, but never learned how to do that. So my son graciously gave us all lessons at the breakfast table. Within about 10 minutes, my 6yo daughter was ready for show and tell. I'm still getting lessons.
2013-04-10 08:45:33 PM
7 votes:
Listen you wankers, just because you're still sore over Margaret Thatcher taking the milk away from all your children doesn't mean you should project your grudges onto us.
2013-04-10 08:43:50 PM
5 votes:
Don't let the British television you see fool you.  Brits want you to think they are all like this:

encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com

When the majority are like this:

encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com  encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com
2013-04-10 10:04:21 PM
4 votes:

r1niceboy: I'm not being generous enough, am I? I do realise that parts of the US do have a fairly gleeful attitude towards incest, which is rare in Britain. Whether that's good or bad is subject to individual interpretation, of course.


We don't have royal families that get pissed off about our incest jokes.
2013-04-10 08:44:16 PM
4 votes:

gambitsgirl: I love milk in hit tea

But

Wtf is up with an English breakfast?!?! Tomatoes? Mushrooms? 4 kinds of meat?


A brit introduced me to baked beans for breakfast. Awesome and it makes the rest of the day more fun.
2013-04-10 10:44:02 PM
3 votes:
British idea of drinking milk

i.imgur.com
2013-04-10 09:05:52 PM
3 votes:

wontar: Notabunny: This can't be a real list. How does one not do these things? Really, like #4. What, are you supposed to just sit quietly next to someone and not talk to them? I don't know how that would happen. Or #10. Are we supposed to go to our separate breakfast tables? Of course everybody has breakfast together, and we talk to each other while having breakfast, too. This has to be a joke.

Yes, you just sit quietly and not talk to them. Why would you bother someone like that? Someone sitting there, minding his own business, and you just strike up a conversation? Why?


Idunno. That's just what you do. It's fun. You say Hi, you talk for a bit, tell a few bad jokes. It's great when the person next to you is from where you live. But it's even more fun when they're from somewhere else. "London! Wow. I love your town. Is it true talking to total strangers on the plane kinda bugs you? That's weird. Did you catch the game last night?" And pretending to be deaf or French doesn't help. I always have something to write on, and I'm not above busting out my 2 years of high school french. Plus, I know a few magic tricks. How can you not talk to a man who just produced a coin from your ear?
2013-04-10 08:45:17 PM
3 votes:
themamareport.com

See this? ^ 
You can floss. All of you. It is now within your... reach.
2013-04-10 08:41:50 PM
3 votes:
American slang evolves every 5 years. British slang changes naught in 250 years.
2013-04-10 04:47:41 PM
3 votes:

violentsalvation: 7. Drinking milk
Moo juice is meant for putting on cereal, adding to pancake batter and pouring in tea.

Barf.


Also, I thought the "proper English way" was to put the milk in the cup, then pour the tea into it.

oldfarthenry: bunner: Moo juice is the jazz.

Lord knows it's been making my bum-hole sound like a Louis Armstrong horn solo as of late.


If I used farky, you would now be "Satchmo."
2013-04-11 01:41:55 AM
2 votes:

Huck And Molly Ziegler: 11) Shooting someone to death: accidentally; on purpose; because I was mad at his dog; because I was mad at her husband; because I was mad at his wife; because I lack the mental skills to carry on a reasonable conversation; because the National Rifle Association said it was OK to; because I didn't like the color of his skin; because I didn't like the color of his wife's skin; because I didn't like where they worship; because I didn't like where they don't worship; because I like violence; because I'm impotent; because he had it coming.


Mostly in Britain, it's poison at the country house over high tea, if Miss Marple has taught me anything.
2013-04-11 12:01:47 AM
2 votes:
Yeah! Why the fark are we  sentimental, friendly, supersized ordering, milk drinking, breakfast eaters?!? No wonder the world hates us.
2013-04-10 10:47:53 PM
2 votes:
Dear Britain,

Over 200 years ago, we threw you and yours to the curb. While we appreciate that our Neighbors to the North still hold y'all in high esteem, and they ARE a very polite people, we likewise, did so for a reason. In that time, we have managed not only to have American Standard English outstrip British Standard English as the language of business abroad, and our financial as well as our industrial capacity outstrip your own by several factors, and even came to y'all's rescue a few times, out of the kindness of our Yank hearts. Well, that and blistering economic opportunities, and personal satisfaction of pulling your bacon out of the fire. In that time, we've managed to pull together a fairly bellicose and belligerent bunch of ex-pats, immigrants, and natives together into a union, with a fair varied experience than your Isles managed to bring. We brought over Scots and Irish, your own kin and kith, the French, the Spanish, even some disenfranchised Mexicans, Cubans, and a few other Latinates including some Italians and even the Portuguese, and in the meantime some Nihonjin, Chinese, some of those Pakis that you REALLY seem down on, some of the Indians that you are still trying to come to terms with, along with our own native population, and knitted them into the fabric of our society. It hasn't been seamless, it has had hiccups, as the imported African labor that you so lovingly helped us with, and then abandoned in your own shores, because, let's face it, you just didn't really seem to have time for all that, since you could just import the tobacco and cotton that we produced anyway, and wash your hands of the human cost that you brought with the whole shebang, and let us figure out what to do with the results of your experiment.

You are surprised that we AREN'T something different than yourselves? We ARE separated by a shared language--one that we've seen fit to modify, since we developed manners that you find curious and oddly embracing and at the same time invasive. We HAVE had room to move, and to expand, while you have been cramped upon your Isles, while we have had to tame a goodish part of the New World, and that sort of means keeping in good touch with our neighbors, some of whom would have parted our skulls from our heads, or shot us and stolen our lands, or at least made us work them for them, or in fact did do exactly that, so yeah, we try to be friendly. We ARE a romantic ideal. We built those ideals upon those that you gifted to us, only we didn't just fantasize about them, we built a nation from them, while you wrote a few novels, and daydreamed. We are a social people, because we NEEDED those ties, and NEEDED those people, while you were defending your tiny yards from those dirty folks who might desire them for their own. We built a nation, while you insulated a nation. We were your expansive spirit, only we severed ties, and did so in the portions of the continent that were not just fertile, but ridiculously so, and lucky for you and a fair portion of the world, we export and share. We are what you could have been, had your aristocracy and monarchy hadn't melded to corporate interests so heavily. Lucky for you, and most of Europe, we ARE making some of those same mistakes, and now you can laugh at us heartily, while you invest and take advantage of the opportunities, and our largess, and our spirit to meddle in other folks' affairs, which in all honesty, we got by watching you.

America is Britain, writ large. We are what your empire might have been, and could have profited from, had your monarchy not been quite such douches. Do we confuse you? Certainly. Heck, the Canuckistanis confuse us, and they are more us than yourselves, but that's because for a long while, we had a LOT more to deal with than a nest of conflicting allegiances and political games on the continent, and an overextended Empire--that is making our own. In fairness, you can laugh at our misadventures now, only because you've made those mistakes, contracted your empire, and now keep only in the game, thanks to assistance from your former colonies, who overshadow you in just about every arena.

Tea comes hot, or it comes iced, and if it's iced, you might want to put some sugar in there, because in America, not putting sugar into tea is a sign of poor hospitality that company doesn't deserve the sugar. Learn that. We like our iced tea. We tip. We like to include our friends in things, and we are often huggers. We share. We like to think we are egalitarian. Ours is NOT making great shakes for that, but we like to pretend, and we make great noises to at least try. It shapes our social context. We DO have decent curry, but on top of that, we have Cajun, we have a whole raft of Southern and South West cooking, our Yankee fare is something to try, along with a whole next of local cuisines. Seriously. And maybe let up on the affection for putting vegetables through the f*cking Auto-da-fe? Seriously. Our Italian and French fellows put us onto the idea that you don't have to cook a vegetable like a f*cking pork roast in the middle of a trichinosis outbreak. It's spinach. It can be just wilted, and actually more tasty if it's not cooked down to the point of liquidity. Same with squash. You do realize that beans, corn and squash are the Holy Trinity in native cuisine here, right? We KNOW what we're doing with the f*ckers. Let us actually show you the way...


Loving regards,

Hubie
2013-04-10 09:41:40 PM
2 votes:

studs up: denbroc: [www.themoviegourmet.com image 432x324]

You know he's American don't you? Dumbass.
/wait for it....


Quit yer trollin, hoser.

storage.canoe.ca
2013-04-10 09:33:49 PM
2 votes:
I remember reading an article years ago, [citation totally needed] that stated that cow's milk molecules were 20,000 times larger than human milk (is this even possible?), and that whale milk was closer in chemistry to human milk than cow's milk. This may have been complete horse hockey put out by the Whale Dairy Association, but I often cite it as gospel to my sister who could drink a cow to a dried husk in a matter of hours.

I grew up on fresh milk that needed to be shaken to mix the cream and butter solids back into into the milk, not on the factory milk facsimile available in the supermarkets. It was straight from the teat, strained through cheesecloth, and immediately chilled.

Having read James Herriot's series of books, I can understand the British aversion to milk, what with the fact that every citizen that lived out of eyeshot of a skyscraper seemed required to spend the majority of their waking hours with their arm shoulder-deep in a cow's vagina.
2013-04-10 09:17:10 PM
2 votes:
To ne fair to the English, they have had some hooligans who gave milk drinkers a bad name.

imageshack.us
2013-04-10 08:47:00 PM
2 votes:
I cannot take this seriously until the Brits stop driving on the wrong side of the road.

Then maybe an international group of us can sit down over a huge breakfast and drink moo-juice and discuss methods to raise the standards of dental health in the UK.
2013-04-10 08:43:52 PM
2 votes:
One is basic dental hygiene.  Two a cake for every day.  Three for lots and lots of love.  Four, hello, how are you sir?  Five is better than vevuzela.  Six fark you fark you fark yoooou.  Seven a very healthy food.  Eight your mom is supersized.  Nine it's just two meals in one.  Ten a lie.
2013-04-10 08:37:58 PM
2 votes:
11. Poutine
2013-04-10 07:20:16 PM
2 votes:

UberDave: He forgot eating chips (fries) by hand.  I usually look out for local customs like that but one evening I was tired and jet lagged and drew some amused looks from a couple's two children.


No, we do that, although it does depend on the setting. In a nice restaurant with nice people then no, we use forks, sometimes, but hands are often used.

Osomatic: Don't worry, British persons.  Nobody here flosses either, except just before and just after dental appointments.


Yeah, everyone I know has floss somewhere, I reckon it's the same here. We go to the dentist and he/she says "floss more", and we say "ok!", then buy some, try using it, the floss gets stuck, we decide its not worth it, spend the rest of the day with floss hanging out of the mouth, then never floss again.

Did I say we? I meant me. But I bet i'm not alone.

And yes, milk on its own tastes like crap. Milk with almost anything else tastes great. Tea, chocolate, coffee, and when its turned into other things, like yogurt and ice cream. I am, however, alone among my friends with that belief. I know plenty who love plain milk, and that displeases me.
2013-04-10 06:23:08 PM
2 votes:
He forgot eating chips (fries) by hand.  I usually look out for local customs like that but one evening I was tired and jet lagged and drew some amused looks from a couple's two children.
2013-04-10 05:25:49 PM
2 votes:
Don't worry, British persons.  Nobody here flosses either, except just before and just after dental appointments.
2013-04-10 04:34:46 PM
2 votes:
Americans like to let the world know that they're having fun - or approve heartily of what's being said or done in front of them - by contorting their vocal chords into a shape that will allow them to pump out obnoxious mouth hoots, one after another. One word: earplugs.

If you take the time to look at it, it's secretly training people's mouths and vocal chords for blowjobs.
2013-04-11 08:21:16 AM
1 votes:
This is funny because, you know, Brits.
2013-04-11 03:42:04 AM
1 votes:

r1niceboy: I do realise that parts of the US do have a fairly gleeful attitude towards incest, which is rare in Britain.


Well Chompers to be fair our countries have very different definitions of "incest".

Here it's unacceptable to knowingly have relations with any family member no matter how distant the relation.  In your country anything beyond 1st cousin is considered perfectly acceptable.

F'ing disgusting.

Queen Elizabeth and that dopey husband that silently follows her around in an apparent drunken stupor is her third cousin.  Creepy.  So laugh away cousin farker.
2013-04-11 03:32:30 AM
1 votes:

justaguy76: How did "voting republican" not make the list of 10 weird american habits the rest fo the world can't understand?


somebody has to pay federal income taxes.
2013-04-11 02:52:45 AM
1 votes:

Maggie_Luna: I hate milk. It always tasted like ass. I think it very 'white' to drink milk for some reason.


IIRC lactose intolerance in adults is far less common in white people than in the rest of the world. That being said, I myself am what is known as fish-belly white and don't have any adults in my family who will drink a glass of the stuff. Unless it's chocolate milk, but then they're all absolute chocolate maniacs who I could probably get to taste poo if they had a head cold and I claimed it was almond whip.
2013-04-11 02:04:23 AM
1 votes:
Whenever I read a BBC article about the US, I feel pretty confident that it was written by a correspondent who was sent here for six months and spent nearly all of that time socializing with only six Americans living in Brooklyn.
2013-04-11 01:10:57 AM
1 votes:

Death Whisper: r1niceboy: Delay: RatOmeter: I don't know of any particular reason that he would be expected to dislike "America" so much.

Frankly, most Scots guys I know don't give one shiat about America, about the same as America gives about their land.

I don't like America very much, but then, I lived in Nebraska for a decade. That'll shiat on any good feeling that could possibly exist.
Well then, please do America a favor and drop dead. Thank You.


Naw, I think I'll stay alive. Your umbrage keeps me warm at night.
2013-04-11 12:51:07 AM
1 votes:
www.ukcc.org.uk

FARKERS: I am disappoint
2013-04-11 12:41:16 AM
1 votes:

oldfarthenry: More like `ten habits a Yank with his head up his ass think is stereo-typically not Britishy'.


The article was written by a Brit you wanker.

Superrad: So, we eat a lot and are outgoing. Yep, that's America.

A

nd seriously what's wrong with that?
2013-04-11 12:19:28 AM
1 votes:

ciberido: Outside the USA, there are a couple of Asian countries (Thailand for one) that drink tea cold, and that's about it. Most of the world drinks tea hot and doesn't even conceive of drinking tea with ice. It's very hard to get ice tea most countries.

Ice tea and cornbread are the two things I miss most when I'm outside the USA.


How do you feel about reds and 90 proof?
2013-04-11 12:17:36 AM
1 votes:

r1niceboy: Delay: RatOmeter: I don't know of any particular reason that he would be expected to dislike "America" so much.

Frankly, most Scots guys I know don't give one shiat about America, about the same as America gives about their land.

I don't like America very much, but then, I lived in Nebraska for a decade. That'll shiat on any good feeling that could possibly exist.

Well then, please do America a favor and drop dead. Thank You.
2013-04-10 11:37:35 PM
1 votes:

CptnSpldng: Popular Opinion: CptnSpldng: studs up: Delay: gambitsgirl: I love milk in hit tea

But

Wtf is up with an English breakfast?!?! Tomatoes? Mushrooms? 4 kinds of meat?

Nope. An English breakfast must include Very dry white toast. Here's a picture of a dryer:
[farm4.static.flickr.com image 500x333]

Marmalade.
Butter.
Eggs.
Fried tomatoes.
Bangers.
Tea or coffee.
Optional: bacon.

Optional? No wonder the sun sets on the Empire.

When the Brits say 'bacon' they mean 'ham.' When they say 'streaky bacon' they mean 'bacon.'

not just streaky bacon....smoked streaky bacon...because they also sell flavorless streaky bacon.
and not just smoked streaky bacon, rindless smoked streaky bacon.
and who the hell eats bacon with the rind on. why the fark do i have to ask you to take it off?

Are you looking for breakfast and a happy ending?


Heaven Is Where:

The French are the chefs
The Italians are the lovers
The British are the police
The Germans are the mechanics
And the Swiss make everything run on time

Hell is Where:

The British are the chefs
The Swiss are the lovers
The French are the mechanics
The Italians make everything run on time
And the Germans are the police

The British contributions to cuisine are dire...
2013-04-10 11:28:35 PM
1 votes:

Omahawg: Omahawg: you know the best thing about the english?


One out of seven girls is attractive?
2013-04-10 11:01:43 PM
1 votes:

starsrift: My guess as to what #1 was, was actually #8.

It's a revolting habit, all the same.


Well, gluttony is bad.  But in the mornings I need the supersized caffeinated sugary carbonated refreshment.  It just enhances my ability to engage strangers with outpourings of compulsory sentimentality.
2013-04-10 10:46:06 PM
1 votes:

Maggie_Luna: I hate milk. It always tasted like ass.


Uh, so, about those milking lessons I sent you money for...
2013-04-10 10:43:16 PM
1 votes:
...

Jesus McSordid: I'm down with the whole drinking milk thing, but one American habit that makes me barf is non-dairy creamer. What's that shiat made from? Some kind of plastic?


It's either whiskey (pref. bourbon) or Bailey's.

Oh, wait, you mean that powdered sh*t?  I have no idea.  I don't know many people that actually use it, either way.  I think they came up with it in the'50's, and it's still on store shelves because it hasn't all been sold yet.  Kind of like Lewis Black's candy corn.
2013-04-10 10:38:24 PM
1 votes:

Nidiot: Jument: I have bad teeth. I'm now up to two implants. I floss like the devil, let me tell you. :(

Yep, floss, brush, mouthwash, the lot. Still earned one root canal and have one less tooth than I'd have liked. Know a guy who only does a bare minimum brush that lasts for less than ten seconds and yet he has perfect teeth. I also have a neighbour who was told by her dentist to stop using toothpaste entirely since it was abrading away her enamel. It isn't as simple as just taking care of them, you get born with high or low quality ones it seems.



Yeah, I think genetics does play a role. That being said, I can't imagine how someone could not floss at least once a day, just to remove anything lodged between the teeth. Just thinking about not flossing gives me the heebee-jeebees.

I've recently done a lot of research on dental health, and the current advice seems to be:

1) always floss before brushing
2) brush gently either using no toothpaste or a toothpaste with a low abrasive index
3) don't rinse after brushing, leave the residual toothpast in your mouth to maximize the fluoride exposure
4) brush in the morning before eating to lower bacteria count
5) if you do brush after eating, wait at least a half hour, because it takes that long for your teeth to repair the erosion caused by acidic foods

I apologize for this weirdly obsessive dental post--I've spent too much time at the dentist lately. It's a good thing my dentist is smoking hot.
2013-04-10 10:30:25 PM
1 votes:

Nabb1: oldfarthenry: bunner: Moo juice is the jazz.

Lord knows it's been making my bum-hole sound like a Louis Armstrong horn solo as of late.

If I used farky, you would now be "Satchmo."


All three of these comments are funnier than anything on that list.

/and you are now 'satchmo's spit-valve'.
2013-04-10 10:28:34 PM
1 votes:
i141.photobucket.com
2013-04-10 10:22:41 PM
1 votes:

Notabunny: This can't be a real list. How does one not do these things? Really, like #4. What, are you supposed to just sit quietly next to someone and not talk to them?


I think you're being cheeky, but I remember riding the tube and this dude sitting next to me sneezed a loud and snotty one!  I said, "Bless you" and he gave me a look like I just told him to fark his mother.  The Brits are weird people.
2013-04-10 10:17:22 PM
1 votes:
This is why it's so easy, and fun, to hate the Brits.  Anything smacking of positive health behaviors sends them running, which is also funny (to watch).  Their teeth are rotted after two years of life in the land of fog and mist, and you can get an idea as to why in this article.  I honestly cannot think of one of their aging rock stars who doesn't have false teeth.  If someone can, let me know.
2013-04-10 10:06:26 PM
1 votes:

eatin' fetus: Maggie_Luna: I hate milk. It always tasted like ass. I think it very 'white' to drink milk for some reason. I am not white and seeing as most of the world does fine without milk drinkage if I ever have children they will abstain from it. I moved on to artificial 'milk' (almond or ohters).  I like cheese though so I must support milk production for yummy cheese. That said you will pour that, honey, sugar, or lemon in my tea when I am cold and gone. Ew.

I hate chicken. It always tasted like ass. I think it very 'black' to eat chicken for some reason. I am not black and seeing as most of the world does fine without chicken eating if I ever have children they will abstain from it. I moved on to artificial 'chicken' (tofu or rabbit).  I like eggs though so I must support chicken production for yummy eggs. That said you will pour that, gravy, in my ass when I am cold and gone. Ew.


Pouring gravy in a dead guy's ass? (will not GIS)
2013-04-10 09:57:56 PM
1 votes:

r1niceboy: Coming from Scotland, and having lived in the US for over a decade, I've cataloged all the things that are better in America.

1. You can turn on a red light.
2. You get ice in all your drinks.
3. Free refills.

Everything else is worse. I would have included the weather, but it does try and kill you occasionally.


You must reside in Detroit.
2013-04-10 09:50:26 PM
1 votes:

"Millions" and "billions"

1,000,000,000?... or 1,000,000,000,000??

3.bp.blogspot.com
2013-04-10 09:13:41 PM
1 votes:
I wouldnt seat the family for breakfast either if all I had to offer was beans and toast.
2013-04-10 09:11:24 PM
1 votes:
I would reciprocate, but I don't know any of the britt's habits because I don't give two shiats about them.
2013-04-10 09:09:59 PM
1 votes:

shmashmortion: As for the comments: who the hell would bother to order half a pint of beer? What's the point?


What's the reason for an establishment not to sell half pints? Sometimes you only want a half.
2013-04-10 09:09:07 PM
1 votes:
My payment to society for not flossing is that I made several boat payments for my dentist.
2013-04-10 09:08:47 PM
1 votes:

RatOmeter: I guess Scotts might not be considered British, but after spending a couple of work weeks in Beijing, then flying south to Liuzhou for more of the same. Checked into the hotel, got my key and slogged myself to the elevator and some other guy got in too. As the "lift" was in transit, he said in a thick Scotts brogue "I wouldn't be caught dead in America". Not sure how he had pegged me, maybe my 501s or maybe he overheard me at the main desk - anyway, I just ignored him.


Where is Scotland? My American geography is kind of terrible...

OH, I SEE. IT'S A LITTLE PIECE OF THE UNITED KINGDOM, BIATCHES!

/If it wasn't for us, you'd all be speaking German, singing, "Deutschland, Deutschland über alles!"
2013-04-10 09:08:43 PM
1 votes:

oh_please: This article =

[motores.com.py image 535x356]


WhoopAssWayne: All of those are pretty cute. I'd be more interested in seeing a list of 10 habits Europeans do that Americans would never understand/guess.


You know what would be maximum trolling for Americans? A list of 10 European habits Brits don't get. Or vice versa.

Also, for reference:

www.d-interp.de
2013-04-10 09:07:34 PM
1 votes:

gambitsgirl: I love milk in hit tea

But

Wtf is up with an English breakfast?!?! Tomatoes? Mushrooms? 4 kinds of meat?


Nope. An English breakfast must include

Very dry white toast. Here's a picture of a dryer:
farm4.static.flickr.com


Marmalade.
Butter.
Eggs.
Fried tomatoes.
Bangers.
Tea or coffee.
Optional: bacon.
2013-04-10 09:03:40 PM
1 votes:
www.themoviegourmet.com
2013-04-10 08:58:20 PM
1 votes:
I find it curious that I read that article with a British accent in my head.
2013-04-10 08:54:08 PM
1 votes:

Nabb1: Also, I thought the "proper English way" was to put the milk in the cup, then pour the tea into it.



img198.imageshack.us
Oy... he's a right M.I.F. isn't he?
2013-04-10 08:50:45 PM
1 votes:

Jument: I have bad teeth. I'm now up to two implants. I floss like the devil, let me tell you. :(

I don't get why taking the leftovers home is a bad thing. Why is it good to waste food or stuff it down your pie hole? I love leftovers!


I think the point is to degrade the food then chuck it at a chav, for amusement.
2013-04-10 08:48:36 PM
1 votes:
#11: pressing a nice fruit basket up against your ex's window.

/or is that just me?
2013-04-10 08:47:31 PM
1 votes:
#676695665: Mobility scooters.
Because walking is hard.
And a real wheelchair that you have to actually make it move yourself(or some dumbass sucker) is super duper hard.
2013-04-10 08:47:02 PM
1 votes:

Superrad: So, we eat a lot and are outgoing. Yep, that's America.


Pretty much. We're basically Rodney Dangerfield.
2013-04-10 08:44:47 PM
1 votes:

Maggie_Luna: I hate milk. It always tasted like ass. I think it very 'white' to drink milk for some reason. I am not white and seeing as most of the world does fine without milk drinkage if I ever have children they will abstain from it. I moved on to artificial 'milk' (almond or ohters).  I like cheese though so I must support milk production for yummy cheese. That said you will pour that, honey, sugar, or lemon in my tea when I am cold and gone. Ew.


racist
2013-04-10 08:43:54 PM
1 votes:
As for the comments: who the hell would bother to order half a pint of beer? What's the point?
2013-04-10 08:42:16 PM
1 votes:
5. Whooping

PROBLEM?

wac.450f.edgecastcdn.net
2013-04-10 08:40:52 PM
1 votes:
This can't be a real list. How does one not do these things? Really, like #4. What, are you supposed to just sit quietly next to someone and not talk to them? I don't know how that would happen. Or #10. Are we supposed to go to our separate breakfast tables? Of course everybody has breakfast together, and we talk to each other while having breakfast, too. This has to be a joke.
2013-04-10 07:52:44 PM
1 votes:
So, we eat a lot and are outgoing. Yep, that's America.
2013-04-10 06:17:59 PM
1 votes:
1. Flossing
Digging sharp string between your teeth everyday is standard oral hygiene procedure in America. We know we're supposed to do this too, but it hurts and it's boring. Most Brits probably own a tub of floss, but only dust it off before a date or dental appointment.


Way to perpetuate that stereotype about British teeth...
2013-04-10 05:26:21 PM
1 votes:
Milk and flossing and they wonder why we have such nice teeth.
2013-04-10 04:49:49 PM
1 votes:
"using all the body parts God gave us when playing football"
2013-04-10 04:46:11 PM
1 votes:
What do they have against milk? Communists.
2013-04-10 04:42:40 PM
1 votes:
7. Drinking milk
Moo juice is meant for putting on cereal, adding to pancake batter and pouring in tea.


Barf.
 
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