cptjeff: desertfool: And what lesbians think of penises is a laugher. Also watch what gay guys think of vaginas.
Honestly, as a hetero male, I think the lesbians have a healthier view of things.


Those are both hilarious.

But gay guys don't have battery operated vaginas in their nightstand. Lesbians (may) have (several) battery operated penises in their nightstand. I guess I don't get it. I doubt fleshlight gets a lot of sales of their female parts from gay guys. I guess lesbians are just more fluid.

//giggity.

Cyberluddite: dudicon: I've seen this quite a few times in the Vancouver area
Maybe they use the shorts to regulate the extra fat-heat

gambitsgirl: Fat people get hot

Obviously, I considered this as the most simple explanation as well.  But the problem with this theory is that, as I said, many of these lesbians wear shorts only in the wintertime when nobody in their right mind does, and then they sweat it out in long pants in the summer when it's hot and everyone else is wearing shorts.  That's the part that's so perplexing to me.  I mean, WTF?

Plus, another problem with the "fatties get overheated" theory is that they still wear winter clothes on their upper bodies along with the shorts in winter--flannel shirts, sweatshirts, coats, etc.--only the shorts are seasonally inappropriate.  I don't get it.

Maybe it's a form of "airing out" since there's a likely chance someone will have their face down there later. Maybe a way "reinforce" regular feminine hygiene products. Probably just a fashion choice. I have no clue, but I've noticed it too.

Witness99: dk47: If you like women, why do you want a woman who looks and acts like a man?  Seriously.  No seriously can someone answer this?

/Same goes for gay men who like effeminate gay men

Lesbians like lesbians, which fall along a complex spectrum. Regardless of how they "present" outwardly, they are not a straight male, nor straight female. It's kind of like how Obama is not black, nor white. He's a mix that is neither one nor the other. (But somehow he's considered the first black president, go figure).

Anyways, as any frustrated and befuddled man can tell you, women are very emotionally complex and process situations much different than men. They have different needs. They want the kind of love and understanding they can't get from men. The attraction is less physical/sexual as everyone keeps implying, but really more mental. Safer, where they dont risk as much man/woman relationship pain. They understand how female brains operate, they understand the same language, they know how their partner is feeling because they can relate. That's my guess anyway.

...aaaaaand you lost me.

Dude, if I was attracted to guys, I would SO date them.  Because I'm in my 30s and my "sexual peak" and hey, the more the merrier.

I date chicks because when I see a hot chick I go into giggle fits and can't help put picture her naked immediately.    If that isn't physical/sexual attraction, I don't know what is.

Also, I do NOT understand how female brains operate.  I understand how MY brain does, but man, humans overall- female and male- y'all are just farked up.  Then again, so am I.  It evens out.

And there is PLENTLY of relationship pain in dyke pairings.  Don't get me farking started on butches and emotional hangups.

/femme
//still goes for the butches, even though they sometimes annoy the fark out of me

Ryker's Peninsula: #1: Can I watch?

I'm surprised this isn't on there.

Some time back (15 years ago), I had a lesbian friend who eventually told me I was the 2nd guy she was ever even remotely attracted to (never sexually to either, but that does kinda come with the territory), and it was entirely because when she first came out to me, I did not immediately say, "can I watch?"  Instead, I asked her if she was happy, said that's all that mattered, and moved on.  When she commented on that, and asked me why I never did ask, I said, "Oh, sure, I'd love to, but I figured being a lesbian doesn't make you an exhibitionist."

/in answer to the question this CSB will necessarily raise: no.

thisiszombocom: 11. do you hate men?

Rhetorical question.

First question I ever asked a lesbian (this was in the 90s, in the deep south, so anyone who was out of the closet was a bit of a curiosity) was, "So are you a fan of Xena: Warrior Princess?"

She thought it was hilarious. Or at least she was good-humored about it.

/and apparently she was more a fan of the blonde sidekick than Lucy Lawless

lordargent: Ringshadow: If you base your attractiveness baseline purely on hair, you need to re-prioritize, I'm just sayin'.

Hey, some women look good ... despite having short hair.

"damn, she would be so much hotter if she cut all of her hair off" is a statement that has never been uttered by a straight man who did not have some sort of a short hair/bald head fetish in the history of mankind.

Anyway, I will just leave this here.

[lh5.ggpht.com image 499x687]

And this

[ak0.okccdn.com image 558x783]

MagSeven: Cyberluddite: dudicon: I've seen this quite a few times in the Vancouver area
Maybe they use the shorts to regulate the extra fat-heat

gambitsgirl: Fat people get hot

Obviously, I considered this as the most simple explanation as well.  But the problem with this theory is that, as I said, many of these lesbians wear shorts only in the wintertime when nobody in their right mind does, and then they sweat it out in long pants in the summer when it's hot and everyone else is wearing shorts.  That's the part that's so perplexing to me.  I mean, WTF?

Plus, another problem with the "fatties get overheated" theory is that they still wear winter clothes on their upper bodies along with the shorts in winter--flannel shirts, sweatshirts, coats, etc.--only the shorts are seasonally inappropriate.  I don't get it.

Maybe it's a form of "airing out" since there's a likely chance someone will have their face down there later. Maybe a way "reinforce" regular feminine hygiene products. Probably just a fashion choice. I have no clue, but I've noticed it too.

It's a form of recognizing their tribe, kind of like when gang bangers wear their pants low, certain color scarfs, or when all the cool kids wear the same $50 Tshirt at a club intead of popping some tags. The fact that their common look is shorts is irrelevant, it could have been anything. Or maybe they like to show off their muscular calves, which might be the most attractive part of their bodies.

This is "Flux," a film from San Francisco State University student Jamie Oliveira (has a slightly NSFW scene with a woman covering another's breasts). It shows how a shift in perception can change how you experience reality.

http://vimeo.com/63552472

Doosh

Cite or you gaught teh ghey!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transsexual_pornography

Follow the links.

vudukungfu: gambitsgirl: nappy dugout.

Pastrami curtains

sausage wallet

Ed Gruberman

But gay guys don't have battery operated vaginas in their nightstand. Lesbians (may) have (several) battery operated penises in their nightstand. I guess I don't get it.

Why wouldn't a gay man use a fake vagina? Its a soft place to put your hard cock, and there isn't a yucky woman attached to it.

Just because someone is a lesbian doesn't mean that they can't enjoy penetration. Penetration feels good, whether you're into men or women.

Cyberluddite: vudukungfu: Cyberluddite: I don't get it

try pulling those sides of beef into a pair of dungarees

Yeah, but again, they do that, but only the summer--when it's even tougher to mash their sweat-soaked flesh into long pants.  This simply cannot be logically explained.

Weathering discomfort stoically as a show of stereotyped masculinity?

gambitsgirl: Fano: redsquid: Ed Grubermann: gambitsgirl:  vajayjay?

My dream is to take everyone who ever says that cursed word and fire them out of a canon into the sun. People sound like four-year-olds when they say that.

Vajayjay is bad, but 'Bajingo' makes me literally cringe uncontrollably. And don't get me started on 'garden'.

Perfumed mouse is my current fav

axe wound - badly wrapped kebab - bald man in a boat - bang hole - bat cave - bean - bearded clam - bearded oyster - beav - beaver - beefcurtain - beef curtain - beef flap - birth cannon - blue waffle - box - bread - buju - camel's foot - camel toe - candy - chach - cha cha - cherry - chocha - cho-cho - chonch - choot - clit - clown hole - clunge - cock - cock pocket - coo - cooch - coochie - cookie - coosie - cooter - cuder - cunny - coont - coont hole - coont punt - cutty - cut up - fanny - fish taco - flange - front bottom - fark hole - fur burger - fur pie - gap - gash - growler - hair burger - hair pie - ham flap - ham wallet - hatchet wound - hooded lady - hoo-hoo - hot pocket - ill na-na - incision - jute - kitty - kooch - kooter - kuder - lip - love taco - lunchmeat - man in the boat - man in the boat, the - meat curtains - meat flap - meatwallet - meat wallet - minge - moose knuckle - muff - muffin - na-na - nappy dugout - neden - ninja foot - nookie - open wound - pink - pink canoe - pink sausage wallet - pink taco - pink velvet sausage wallet - piss flaps - pookie - poon - poonaner - poonani - poontang - poon tang pie - pootang - poo tang - pooter - pootie tang - promised land, the - punani - punanni - puss - pussy - putang - pu-tang - quif - quiff - quim - quivering mound of love pudding - roast beef - roast beef curtains - slit - smush mitten - snatch - snizz - soggy box - sprained vagina - tampon tunnel - tang - trim - tunnel of love - twat - twitchet - V - vadge - vag - vagine - vagoo - vajayjay - va-jay-jay - vajizzle - vertical smile - whisker biscuit - whispering eye - wizard sleeve - woo - woogi ...

holee chit Gambit! do you have quite the vulvabullary!

What do Lesbians do in bed?

I imagine that you're a straight man, since we all know that from 13 to 22 most girls are de-facto lesbians at sleepovers where they have pillowfights and 'practice' kissing, in part because they fear sex and pregnancy, and in part because they find the boys around them boring, annoying or otherwise unattractive. Many of them do so to keep focused on their schooling and studies, so they can have fruitful lives with the man who eventually knocks them up after they actually start farking men.

They one thing they don't do, according to most straight men and their supporters, is 'fark'. They don't fark becuase they don't have boy-junk to put in their girl-junk, and even if they did have boy junk it'd not have and semen, and so she couldn't get pregnant, meaning they don't have to take any precautions like birth control or timing their intercourse at 'safe' periods.

So, much like gay men, they don't 'fark'.

They lick parts of each other,
they suck on parts of each other,
they kiss,
they poke and prod parts of each other,
they rub parts of each other (even girl-junk against girl-junk,
and they use toys on each other.

I am sure if you have enough money you can find some girls who are at least gay for pay who will show you what they do.

There, are you happy?

gambitsgirl: Earguy: My question for a lesbian, and I have asked my lesbian friends and never really gotten a good answer:

Look, I get being attracted to a woman.  Guys are gross.  Women are beautiful and they smell and feel good.  But I see many lesbian couples where one is femme and the other is "butch."  You'll even see lesbian weddings where one wears a dress and the other wears a man-tailored suit.   My question is, if you're attracted to masculinity, why not be with a man?

I'm not trying to be a smart ass here.  And I'm not being judgmental.  I'm just perplexed.

Cause when you take the man clothes off there are tots and vajayjay?

/not a lesbian
//just a guess
///boys have penises. Girls have vaginas

Can I have your tots?

Dear Penthouse magazine,

bim1154: One of the very rare experiences I had was back in 1973, the year I graduated high school.  I am from a very small community in SW La.  Total seniors the year I graduated was 19.

We had quite a few lesbians in that school for being such a small school.  Amazingly, even in that day we tended to ignore them without being mean or what ever.

One night I was taking a date out and we stopped by the local bar (drinking age was 18 but we could go to that bar at 17), and the two main lesbian girls were there.  Somehow we all made plans to go to the drive-in together, a double date kind of thing.  I had a 66 Dodge Coronet at the time and they ended up sitting in the back seat while my girlfriend and I were in the front.

I can't remember the movie, but what I do recall is everyone was making out... my girlfriend and I in the front seat, the "girls" in the backseat.  I was very aware of the heavy breathing and the little wet sounds of fingers dipping into the honey wells in the backseat.... I was so farking aroused at the faux orgy that I blew a wad in my pants.  At that age I could usually get a couple off a night.

I will never forget that night.

Sincerely, Glenn Beck

rynthetyn: Stupidest question I was ever asked, bar none: Whether my dislike of Twinkies (because apparently not liking a particular item of pre-processed junk food is unfathomable to some people) was because Twinkies reminded me of cocks. Yes, I was asked that, for reals.

That's... very sad. Dare I ask how you replied?

I can appreciate an attractive man like I can appreciate an attractive coffee table. I can look at it and say, "My, that's one mighty fine piece of carpentry," but I don't want to wake up next to it and make it post-coital poached eggs.

So...lesbians don't cook?  Got it.

Transpogue: when I see a hot chick I go into giggle fits and can't help put picture her naked immediately.

*Highfive*  Me too.
Well, minus the giggle fits.

Some women seem to find it disgusting but hey, I can't help it any more than they can help liking shoes.

At a press conference during some tennis tournament many years ago, Martina Navritilova was asked by some douchebaggy male reporter, "Are you still a lesbian?"

Unperturbed, she shot back, "Are you still the alternative?"

sgnilward: Why are so many fat and in abusive relationships?

Are lesbians just confused WalMart shoppers?

To be fair, there are fat straight chix too.

I'm personally curious why university lesbians all used to (back in the day) wear The Lesbian Uniform.

Where I lived, early 90s, it was differently coloured running shoes and colorful pants suspenders. A specific brand of jeans too I think. Literally every frickin lesbian I knee dressed like that. Why the uniform?

Ed Grubermann: desertfool: cptjeff: desertfool: And what lesbians think of penises is a laugher. Also watch what gay guys think of vaginas.
Honestly, as a hetero male, I think the lesbians have a healthier view of things.


Those are both hilarious.

But gay guys don't have battery operated vaginas in their nightstand. Lesbians (may) have (several) battery operated penises in their nightstand. I guess I don't get it.

You are aware that there are a lot of nerve ending inside the vagina, are you not?

Oh yeah, but finding them is pretty hard.

And a device doesn't have to shaped like the original equipment. Just like the version of the equipment doesn't have to be shape like a female for guys to get off when their nerve endings are stimulated.

/Drunk, and not wanting to piss off the lesbians. Just curious.
//Thought it was funny that girls were accepting to penises, the gays HATED vaginas.

or, you know, for free

Fano: #7 Is just the same clueless thing lots of people do when they meet someone "different." Ask any minority if they haven"t been subjected to the "heyI know another person like you and i like them too. Maybe you guys could be together and i'I'm just being helpful

And I'm sure it would blow her mind to learn that single straight young men get told all about their grandmothers' friends granddaughters with a wink-wink-nudge-nudge.

MFAWG: dudicon: Cyberluddite: I have one.  I've asked a few lesbian friends this question and they can't figure it out either.  And it's this:

What's the deal with some lesbians (pretty much exclusively chubby, butch ones--never femmes) who wear shorts as their casual apparel of choice all winter when it's cold outside and nobody else is wearing them--especially given that these same lesbians often tend to not wear shorts in the summer when the weather is hot and everyone else wears them?

Have others noticed this?  Or is this just a  local lesbian fashion trend, not seen elsewhere?  I dunno, but the bottom line is that if you see a woman wearing shorts around here in December when everyone else is bundled up in warm clothes, 99.9% of the time they are both (a) fat and (b) a lesbian.  WTF is up with that?  Any TF lesbians wanna take a shot at answering that one?

I've seen this quite a few times in the Vancouver area

Maybe they use the shorts to regulate the extra fat-heat

The 'shorts all the time look' was a thing in the Bay Area/San Jose when I lived down there in the late 90s. I recall it as being a Latino thing mostly. I've seen it up here in Seattle too, but never associated it with lesbians.

I associate it with the slightly overweight, short, gregarious guy in college.

Had one in my major who wore shorts in the snow every damn year. Most everyone I knew in a math/science/engin major had one too.

/shrug
//lesbians I knew/know generally don't wear khaki shorts but my guess is it's a f-k it I'm comfortable pockets >>> purse thing?

Peki: ModernLuddite: Why aren't lesbians allowed to have fun/sense of humor?

Because we'd just lose it anyway dealing with men all the time and not having the benefit of wanting to sleep with them to make it worthwhile.

Dealing with men.  :( That sounds awful.  I'm glad no one else has to go through that.  But since you're unique, you get to have a unique response.

I had a friend in college who was a butch, and I used to give her rides to the local gay/lesbian bar every other week so she could take part in their drag show. My favorite way to pass the time while she was doing her glamour thing was to hang out at the bar and shoot the shiat with the lesbians. Mostly we talked about our tastes in women, booze, and occasionally guitars. Here are some questions I asked which met with positive responses:

-Brunettes or redheads?
-Big tits or small?
-Shave, trim, or bush - which is best?
-Ale or lager?
-Rum or whiskey?
-What gauge strings are the best?
-Hardtail bridge, or tremolo?

Plus, one time I kept buying one shots until she taught me the cunnilingual equivalent of the Five-Point Palm Exploding Heart Technique, which she was notorious for keeping a closely-guarded secret.

/CSB