FARK.com: (7691217) Have a question for a lesbian? Don't ask any of these ten stupid ones. Try thinking outside the box

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		Have a question for a lesbian? Don't ask any of these ten stupid ones. Try thinking outside the box (newstatesman.com)		349
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WTF Indeed		2013-04-09 08:39:17 PM

What's with the whole moving into together after a month of dating?

Fano		2013-04-09 08:39:35 PM

redsquid: Ed Grubermann: gambitsgirl: vajayjay?

My dream is to take everyone who ever says that cursed word and fire them out of a canon into the sun. People sound like four-year-olds when they say that.

Vajayjay is bad, but 'Bajingo' makes me literally cringe uncontrollably. And don't get me started on 'garden'.

Perfumed mouse is my current fav

amquelbettamin		2013-04-09 08:39:38 PM

SurfaceTension: I don't want to know what lesbians do in bed. I can figure that much out for myself.

What I want to know is how do they know they're done with sex? With us guys, we spurt and that pretty much signals the end or at least the beginning of the end. But lesbians could go at it for hours if they wanted to. So how do they know to be done?

They butch one asks for a sandwich?

Mimic_Octopus		2013-04-09 08:40:05 PM

How about :

"why do you all have such condescending, snotty attitudes, that make regular guys farking hate you , remember you are the one evolution decided should not want to breed ? "

sgnilward		2013-04-09 08:40:08 PM

Why are so many fat and in abusive relationships?

Are lesbians just confused WalMart shoppers?

Popular Opinion		2013-04-09 08:40:23 PM

relaxitsjustme		2013-04-09 08:40:55 PM

11. Are you really as biatchy as you come off as in TFA?

Shedim		2013-04-09 08:41:13 PM

doosh		2013-04-09 08:41:47 PM

bim1154: .... I was so farking aroused at the faux orgy that I blew a wad in my pants. At that age I could usually get a couple off a night.

I will never forget that night.

You didn't turn around and stare?? What's wrong with you?

Popular Opinion		2013-04-09 08:42:23 PM

i know this is going to be offensive to some...so sorry in advance...

but how many lesbians are just straight women who have given up on attracting a man?

sandbar67		2013-04-09 08:43:03 PM

My question would be: Do you really use tartar sauce as a lubricant?

FirstNationalBastard		2013-04-09 08:43:45 PM

gambitsgirl: Ed Grubermann: gambitsgirl: vajayjay?

My dream is to take everyone who ever says that cursed word and fire them out of a canon into the sun. People sound like four-year-olds when they say that.

Will you buy me cotton candy first?

Will that cotton candy you're eating be framing a paper cut?

Banned on the Run		2013-04-09 08:43:48 PM

Mugato		2013-04-09 08:43:55 PM

Wow, that dyke has a real chip on her shoulder.

gambitsgirl		2013-04-09 08:44:45 PM

Fano: redsquid: Ed Grubermann: gambitsgirl: vajayjay?

My dream is to take everyone who ever says that cursed word and fire them out of a canon into the sun. People sound like four-year-olds when they say that.

Vajayjay is bad, but 'Bajingo' makes me literally cringe uncontrollably. And don't get me started on 'garden'.

Perfumed mouse is my current fav

axe wound - badly wrapped kebab - bald man in a boat - bang hole - bat cave - bean - bearded clam - bearded oyster - beav - beaver - beefcurtain - beef curtain - beef flap - birth cannon - blue waffle - box - bread - buju - camel's foot - camel toe - candy - chach - cha cha - cherry - chocha - cho-cho - chonch - choot - clit - clown hole - clunge - cock - cock pocket - coo - cooch - coochie - cookie - coosie - cooter - cuder - cunny - coont - coont hole - coont punt - cutty - cut up - fanny - fish taco - flange - front bottom - fark hole - fur burger - fur pie - gap - gash - growler - hair burger - hair pie - ham flap - ham wallet - hatchet wound - hooded lady - hoo-hoo - hot pocket - ill na-na - incision - jute - kitty - kooch - kooter - kuder - lip - love taco - lunchmeat - man in the boat - man in the boat, the - meat curtains - meat flap - meatwallet - meat wallet - minge - moose knuckle - muff - muffin - na-na - nappy dugout - neden - ninja foot - nookie - open wound - pink - pink canoe - pink sausage wallet - pink taco - pink velvet sausage wallet - piss flaps - pookie - poon - poonaner - poonani - poontang - poon tang pie - pootang - poo tang - pooter - pootie tang - promised land, the - punani - punanni - puss - pussy - putang - pu-tang - quif - quiff - quim - quivering mound of love pudding - roast beef - roast beef curtains - slit - smush mitten - snatch - snizz - soggy box - sprained vagina - tampon tunnel - tang - trim - tunnel of love - twat - twitchet - V - vadge - vag - vagine - vagoo - vajayjay - va-jay-jay - vajizzle - vertical smile - whisker biscuit - whispering eye - wizard sleeve - woo - woogit - wugget - wuss

untaken_name		2013-04-09 08:45:10 PM

Good thing to know she speaks for all lesbians. Also, she's wrong about #1. At least in some cases.

SurfaceTension		2013-04-09 08:45:20 PM

cgraves67: Good question. I've gotten through a whole lesbian porn video to find out.

Speak for yourself

/spurt

gambitsgirl		2013-04-09 08:45:24 PM

Banned on the Run: gambitsgirl: Ed Grubermann: gambitsgirl: vajayjay?

My dream is to take everyone who ever says that cursed word and fire them out of a canon into the sun. People sound like four-year-olds when they say that.

Will you buy me cotton candy first?

How do you feel about hoo-hah?

I say wangdangler for boy naughty bits

FirstNationalBastard		2013-04-09 08:45:48 PM

gambitsgirl: Fano: redsquid: Ed Grubermann: gambitsgirl: vajayjay?

My dream is to take everyone who ever says that cursed word and fire them out of a canon into the sun. People sound like four-year-olds when they say that.

Vajayjay is bad, but 'Bajingo' makes me literally cringe uncontrollably. And don't get me started on 'garden'.

Perfumed mouse is my current fav

axe wound - badly wrapped kebab - bald man in a boat - bang hole - bat cave - bean - bearded clam - bearded oyster - beav - beaver - beefcurtain - beef curtain - beef flap - birth cannon - blue waffle - box - bread - buju - camel's foot - camel toe - candy - chach - cha cha - cherry - chocha - cho-cho - chonch - choot - clit - clown hole - clunge - cock - cock pocket - coo - cooch - coochie - cookie - coosie - cooter - cuder - cunny - coont - coont hole - coont punt - cutty - cut up - fanny - fish taco - flange - front bottom - fark hole - fur burger - fur pie - gap - gash - growler - hair burger - hair pie - ham flap - ham wallet - hatchet wound - hooded lady - hoo-hoo - hot pocket - ill na-na - incision - jute - kitty - kooch - kooter - kuder - lip - love taco - lunchmeat - man in the boat - man in the boat, the - meat curtains - meat flap - meatwallet - meat wallet - minge - moose knuckle - muff - muffin - na-na - nappy dugout - neden - ninja foot - nookie - open wound - pink - pink canoe - pink sausage wallet - pink taco - pink velvet sausage wallet - piss flaps - pookie - poon - poonaner - poonani - poontang - poon tang pie - pootang - poo tang - pooter - pootie tang - promised land, the - punani - punanni - puss - pussy - putang - pu-tang - quif - quiff - quim - quivering mound of love pudding - roast beef - roast beef curtains - slit - smush mitten - snatch - snizz - soggy box - sprained vagina - tampon tunnel - tang - trim - tunnel of love - twat - twitchet - V - vadge - vag - vagine - vagoo - vajayjay - va-jay-jay - vajizzle - vertical smile - whisker biscuit - whispering eye - wizard sleeve - woo - woogi ...

No "shame cave"?

caddisfly		2013-04-09 08:46:02 PM

farkingismybusiness: Why Suburus?

And Blue Heelers? These are riddles wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma.

StatelyGreekAutomaton		2013-04-09 08:46:44 PM

What is your favourite flavour of fish?

doosh		2013-04-09 08:46:55 PM

Ed Grubermann: gambitsgirl: vajayjay?

My dream is to take everyone who ever says that cursed word and fire them out of a canon into the sun. People sound like four-year-olds when they say that.

What's wrong with saying vajayjay Ed? Can i call it vaj for short?

/love the vajajay

lordargent		2013-04-09 08:47:08 PM

Ringshadow: If you base your attractiveness baseline purely on hair, you need to re-prioritize, I'm just sayin'.

Hey, some women look good ... despite having short hair.

"damn, she would be so much hotter if she cut all of her hair off" is a statement that has never been uttered by a straight man who did not have some sort of a short hair/bald head fetish in the history of mankind.

Anyway, I will just leave this here.

lh5.ggpht.com

And this

Fano		2013-04-09 08:47:39 PM

#7 Is just the same clueless thing lots of people do when they meet someone "different." Ask any minority if they haven"t been subjected to the "heyI know another person like you and i like them too. Maybe you guys could be together and i'I'm just being helpful

gambitsgirl		2013-04-09 08:47:48 PM

FirstNationalBastard: gambitsgirl: Ed Grubermann: gambitsgirl: vajayjay?

My dream is to take everyone who ever says that cursed word and fire them out of a canon into the sun. People sound like four-year-olds when they say that.

Will you buy me cotton candy first?

Will that cotton candy you're eating be framing a paper cut?

Prefer ballparks. But never tried a taco.

ProfessorOhki		2013-04-09 08:48:12 PM

MeanJean: dk47

No it goes beyond taste. There is at least 33 1/3% of lesbians who like masculine girls. There are MAXIMUM 1/2 of 1% of straight guys that like chicks with dicks.

You are aware that men who consume transsexual pornography overwhelmingly identify with as straight, right?

You are aware that those two statistics don't directly conflict, right?

vudukungfu		2013-04-09 08:48:21 PM

Why do you all seem to drive Subarus?
What's the deal with airline food?
Can you help me move a refrigerator?
Is that a St Andrew's cross that you're moving into the bedroom right opposite mine with these thin walls?
AND a spanking bench?

doosh		2013-04-09 08:48:29 PM

MeanJean: dk47

You are aware that men who consume transsexual pornography overwhelmingly identify with as straight, right?

Cite or you gaught teh ghey!

SurfaceTension		2013-04-09 08:48:57 PM

miss diminutive: SurfaceTension: I don't want to know what lesbians do in bed. I can figure that much out for myself.

What I want to know is how do they know they're done with sex? With us guys, we spurt and that pretty much signals the end or at least the beginning of the end. But lesbians could go at it for hours if they wanted to. So how do they know to be done?

I'm not a lesbian, but after a good, soul-shattering, bone-shuddering, vision-impairing, breath-stealing, obscenity-inducing orgasm, most women are done. Spurting has little to do with it.

Thanks for the perspective. And the image.

desertfool		2013-04-09 08:49:20 PM

MeanJean: Earguy

Look, Igetbeing attracted to a woman. Guys are gross. Women are beautiful and they smell and feel good. But I see many lesbian couples where one is femme and the other is "butch." You'll even see lesbian weddings where one wears a dress and the other wears a man-tailored suit. My question is, if you're attracted to masculinity, why not be with a man?

It isn't that they are just shallowly imitating hetero couples. The butch femme thing is a very complicated, multi-layered, interpersonal statement.

Also, I would imagine it allows one to enjoy having a masculine partner without having to deal with one of those yucky penises.

And what lesbians think of penises is a laugher. Also watch what gay guys think of vaginas.
Honestly, as a hetero male, I think the lesbians have a healthier view of things.

vudukungfu		2013-04-09 08:49:33 PM

gambitsgirl		2013-04-09 08:49:45 PM

FirstNationalBastard: gambitsgirl: Fano: redsquid: Ed Grubermann: gambitsgirl: vajayjay?

My dream is to take everyone who ever says that cursed word and fire them out of a canon into the sun. People sound like four-year-olds when they say that.

Vajayjay is bad, but 'Bajingo' makes me literally cringe uncontrollably. And don't get me started on 'garden'.

Perfumed mouse is my current fav

axe wound - badly wrapped kebab - bald man in a boat - bang hole - bat cave - bean - bearded clam - bearded oyster - beav - beaver - beefcurtain - beef curtain - beef flap - birth cannon - blue waffle - box - bread - buju - camel's foot - camel toe - candy - chach - cha cha - cherry - chocha - cho-cho - chonch - choot - clit - clown hole - clunge - cock - cock pocket - coo - cooch - coochie - cookie - coosie - cooter - cuder - cunny - coont - coont hole - coont punt - cutty - cut up - fanny - fish taco - flange - front bottom - fark hole - fur burger - fur pie - gap - gash - growler - hair burger - hair pie - ham flap - ham wallet - hatchet wound - hooded lady - hoo-hoo - hot pocket - ill na-na - incision - jute - kitty - kooch - kooter - kuder - lip - love taco - lunchmeat - man in the boat - man in the boat, the - meat curtains - meat flap - meatwallet - meat wallet - minge - moose knuckle - muff - muffin - na-na - nappy dugout - neden - ninja foot - nookie - open wound - pink - pink canoe - pink sausage wallet - pink taco - pink velvet sausage wallet - piss flaps - pookie - poon - poonaner - poonani - poontang - poon tang pie - pootang - poo tang - pooter - pootie tang - promised land, the - punani - punanni - puss - pussy - putang - pu-tang - quif - quiff - quim - quivering mound of love pudding - roast beef - roast beef curtains - slit - smush mitten - snatch - snizz - soggy box - sprained vagina - tampon tunnel - tang - trim - tunnel of love - twat - twitchet - V - vadge - vag - vagine - vagoo - vajayjay - va-jay-jay - vajizzle - vertical smile - whisker biscuit - whispering eye - wizard sleeve - woo - woogi ...

No "shame cave"?

Disappointing. But I did rather like smush mitten and nappy dugout.

Fano		2013-04-09 08:51:13 PM

Titterywhoppet

Ryker's Peninsula		2013-04-09 08:51:28 PM

Can we all at least agree that there wasn't one good band in all of the Lilith Fair tours?

Gawdzila		2013-04-09 08:51:41 PM

Mad_Radhu: PapaChester: To answer the last question, short hair doesn't look good on anyone.

I disagree. Carey Mulligan, for example just looks a 100% more adorable with short hair.

[www.flickfilosopher.com image 460x276]

Disagree. I think she looks much better with long hair.

Cyberluddite		2013-04-09 08:51:52 PM

dudicon: I've seen this quite a few times in the Vancouver area
Maybe they use the shorts to regulate the extra fat-heat

gambitsgirl: Fat people get hot

Obviously, I considered this as the most simple explanation as well. But the problem with this theory is that, as I said, many of these lesbians wear shorts only in the wintertime when nobody in their right mind does, and then they sweat it out in long pants in the summer when it's hot and everyone else is wearing shorts. That's the part that's so perplexing to me. I mean, WTF?

Plus, another problem with the "fatties get overheated" theory is that they still wear winter clothes on their upper bodies along with the shorts in winter--flannel shirts, sweatshirts, coats, etc.--only the shorts are seasonally inappropriate. I don't get it.

vudukungfu		2013-04-09 08:51:53 PM

gambitsgirl: nappy dugout.

Pastrami curtains

LoneWolf343		2013-04-09 08:53:01 PM

Question #1 isn't really that dumb of a question, if you believe in the Kinsey scale.

PapaChester: To answer the last question, short hair doesn't look good on anyone.

I'm weird. I think men should have long hair and women short hair.

vudukungfu		2013-04-09 08:53:13 PM

Cyberluddite: I don't get it

try pulling those sides of beef into a pair of dungarees

cgraves67		2013-04-09 08:55:46 PM

SurfaceTension: cgraves67: Good question. I've gotten through a whole lesbian porn video to find out.

Speak for yourself

/spurt

I missed a not in there. The Fark mobile app is hell for commenting.

Cyberluddite		2013-04-09 08:56:25 PM

vudukungfu: Cyberluddite: I don't get it

try pulling those sides of beef into a pair of dungarees

Yeah, but again, they do that, but only the summer--when it's even tougher to mash their sweat-soaked flesh into long pants. This simply cannot be logically explained.

Mentalenemasquad		2013-04-09 08:57:02 PM

Earguy: My question for a lesbian, and I have asked my lesbian friends and never really gotten a good answer:

Look, I get being attracted to a woman. Guys are gross. Women are beautiful and they smell and feel good. But I see many lesbian couples where one is femme and the other is "butch." You'll even see lesbian weddings where one wears a dress and the other wears a man-tailored suit. My question is, if you're attracted to masculinity, why not be with a man?

I'm not trying to be a smart ass here. And I'm not being judgmental. I'm just perplexed.

Well the problem is this: You are trying to figure out how females think. Stop it. Some things have no explanation or consistency - they simply are. You don't always have to know how things work. Just know that somehow they work...

Ryker's Peninsula		2013-04-09 08:57:02 PM

How can you know that I can't go down better on you than your girlfriend if I've never gone down on you?

BullBearMS		2013-04-09 08:57:18 PM

If you had any sense at all, the question you should be asking is, "how do you properly eat pussy?"

cptjeff		2013-04-09 08:57:52 PM

desertfool: And what lesbians think of penises is a laugher. Also watch what gay guys think of vaginas.
Honestly, as a hetero male, I think the lesbians have a healthier view of things.

Those are both hilarious.

bunner		2013-04-09 08:57:53 PM

No. I do not.

tom baker's scarf		2013-04-09 08:58:12 PM

Ed Grubermann: Peki: ModernLuddite: Why aren't lesbians allowed to have fun/sense of humor?

Because we'd just lose it anyway dealing with men all the time and not having the benefit of wanting to sleep with them to make it worthwhile.

That's okay. We're tired of your shiat, too.

Aaaaaaand we are done here. Someone get the lights please.

Witness99		2013-04-09 08:59:46 PM

dk47: If you like women, why do you want a woman who looks and acts like a man? Seriously. No seriously can someone answer this?

/Same goes for gay men who like effeminate gay men

Lesbians like lesbians, which fall along a complex spectrum. Regardless of how they "present" outwardly, they are not a straight male, nor straight female. It's kind of like how Obama is not black, nor white. He's a mix that is neither one nor the other. (But somehow he's considered the first black president, go figure).

Anyways, as any frustrated and befuddled man can tell you, women are very emotionally complex and process situations much different than men. They have different needs. They want the kind of love and understanding they can't get from men. The attraction is less physical/sexual as everyone keeps implying, but really more mental. Safer, where they dont risk as much man/woman relationship pain. They understand how female brains operate, they understand the same language, they know how their partner is feeling because they can relate. That's my guess anyway.

GrizzledVeteran		2013-04-09 09:01:11 PM

Ryker's Peninsula: If you're not attracted to men, why do some of you dress, act, and look like them?

The author of TFA offered a kind of explanation (re the fake-appendage thing): "they're not trying to be men, they're having sexy fun times appropriating masculinity. There's a big difference."

/not that I think that explains everything, but there you go.

Harry Freakstorm		2013-04-09 09:01:51 PM

If you have two lesbians of equal demeanor, i.e. nether is butch, how is it decided that who should make a sandwich for whom post coitus?

And, again post coitus, should one lesbian begin watching, I dunno, the Cat Channel, does the other lesbian join in or complain loudly about 'just using me for my body and not appreciating me as a person'.

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