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(Metro)   Giant penis causes closure of world-famous Nurburgring racing track   (metro.co.uk) divider line 82
    More: Amusing, Nurburgring, German police, racing tracks  
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13253 clicks; posted to Main » on 09 Apr 2013 at 10:27 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-04-09 07:42:36 PM
Wasn't me. I haven't painted a giant penis on a German racetrack since Hockenheimring in '06.
 
2013-04-09 07:45:22 PM
'Stiff penalties'
i228.photobucket.com
 
2013-04-09 08:35:16 PM
In before the Jon Hamm comments...
 
2013-04-09 08:43:31 PM
What did they do with his Porsche?
 
2013-04-09 08:56:25 PM
Penis
 
2013-04-09 09:13:12 PM
Where were the guys from Top Gear when this happened?
 
2013-04-09 09:40:55 PM
Hey you straight-a-way types, watch out for that notorious Brunnchen corner!!!
 
2013-04-09 09:41:24 PM

sithon: Where were the guys from Top Gear when this happened?


Some say he draws life-sized models of his willy everywhere he goes. All we know is, he's called The Stig.
 
2013-04-09 09:45:51 PM
Yeah, I'd blame Clarkson and make him prove his innocence.
 
2013-04-09 10:01:29 PM
Does it curve to the left?
 
2013-04-09 10:04:26 PM
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2273661/Jeremy-Clarksons-crud e -sausage-stunt-slammed-viewers.html

The answer of the call center rep once he told her what he had done was priceless.

"Oh my"

So yeah, its Clarkson again.
 
2013-04-09 10:30:34 PM
This is the largest gentleman's sausage...

...in the world.
 
2013-04-09 10:32:34 PM
Grody.

That's a danish I don't want to see in the display case.

/Pig in a blanket, anyone?
 
2013-04-09 10:33:32 PM
Sorry everyone... Sorry!  Guy in the back there... Sorry about all this.  Totally my fault.  Sorry!
 
2013-04-09 10:34:13 PM

Twitch Boy: This is the largest gentleman's sausage...

...in the world.


Haha, perfect Clarkson impersonation right there.
 
2013-04-09 10:36:12 PM
green hell
 
2013-04-09 10:39:08 PM
It's the Great Second Life Penis Wars all over again.
 
2013-04-09 10:44:53 PM
SheiB, ist die Uberschlongen!
 
2013-04-09 10:45:04 PM
Police are seeking these persons of interest:

resources1.news.com.au
 
2013-04-09 10:47:00 PM

God Is My Co-Pirate: sithon: Where were the guys from Top Gear when this happened?

Some say he draws life-sized models of his willy everywhere he goes. And some say he needs a lorry for each of his massive testicles. All we know is, he's called The Stig.


FTFY

Anderson's Pooper: Yeah, I'd blame Clarkson and make him prove his innocence.


Certainly doesn't sound like something Captain Slow would try to pull off. And we all know that Hamster, being a "short, cross bloke" (his own words, mind you), doesn't have the manhood necessary.
 
2013-04-09 10:49:24 PM
Give it up, Clarkson, Sabine Schmitz is not going to sleep with you.

"I draw a better penis than that by smoking the tires on a van!"

images.topgear.net.pl
 
2013-04-09 10:49:59 PM

mbillips: Police are seeking these persons of interest:

[resources1.news.com.au image 316x237]


Correction: Police believe the suspect to be...uh...in a white racing suit. Artist's impression follows...
 
2013-04-09 10:50:47 PM
www.topgear.com
 
2013-04-09 10:52:57 PM
I was playing about in Forza 4 last week and went on the Nurburgring with--wait for it--a Fiat 500 Abarth. Posted a time of 9m 36s dead. And I did not draw a giant dong in the middle of a turning.
 
2013-04-09 10:53:25 PM
How could anybody be offended by Top Gear? They're obviously playing parodies of themselves for comedic purposes, like Steven Colbert does every night. Complaining about guys playing at hooliganism is silly.
 
2013-04-09 10:53:55 PM
onemansblog.com
 
2013-04-09 10:54:22 PM
Jaaaaaaaaaaaaaag
 
2013-04-09 10:54:44 PM

Twitch Boy: This is the largest gentleman's sausage...

...in the world.


God help me, I read that in Clarkson's voice.

Titty sprinkles.
 
2013-04-09 10:55:10 PM

maram500: I was playing about in Forza 4 last week and went on the Nurburgring with--wait for it--a Fiat 500 Abarth. Posted a time of 9m 36s dead. And I did not draw a giant dong in the middle of a turning.


What the hell did you upgrade it to? That's a 13 minute car stock, and it probably handled like shiat.

/Bucket List achiever
//No, I don't have a life
 
2013-04-09 10:55:24 PM

Adolf Oliver Nipples: How could anybody be offended by Top Gear? They're obviously playing parodies of themselves for comedic purposes, like Steven Colbert does every night. Complaining about guys playing at hooliganism is silly.


More hyper-reality versions than parody versions imo.
 
2013-04-09 10:55:26 PM
Subby missed a golden opportunity to call it a dick move.
 
2013-04-09 10:58:13 PM
He may be an annoying smug English guy, but it's not polite to call him a giant penis.

/Oh you English are SO superior aren't you? Well, would you like to know where you'd be without US the good old U.S. of A. to protect you? The smallest farking province in the Russian Empire, that's where!
 
2013-04-09 10:58:33 PM
www.thenewage.co.za
 
2013-04-09 10:58:55 PM

Adolf Oliver Nipples: How could anybody be offended by Top Gear? They're obviously playing parodies of themselves for comedic purposes, like Steven Colbert does every night. Complaining about guys playing at hooliganism is silly.


I don't believe they're "playing at" hooliganism. I think they're just being themselves, since anything else couldn't last this long. This means that I believe Jeremy Clarkson is that much of an ass and a stuck-up Merc enthusiast, Richard Hammond is a strange man with a puppy's level of attention, and James May is permanently living in 1952 and his fashion sense proves it.

Anyway, who cares? The show is just fantastic, but I really wish there were a few more episodes per series. We had, what, five episodes (the Africa special I count as one episode), and now we get to watch reruns until the fall? Makes me sad.
 
2013-04-09 10:58:57 PM
And do you know who else was a gigantic German dick?
 
2013-04-09 10:59:46 PM

maram500: Anyway, who cares? The show is just fantastic, but I really wish there were a few more episodes per series. We had, what, five episodes (the Africa special I count as one episode), and now we get to watch reruns until the fall? Makes me sad.


Netflix. 18 seasons. I never, ever get bored.
 
2013-04-09 11:02:26 PM

Adolf Oliver Nipples: maram500: Anyway, who cares? The show is just fantastic, but I really wish there were a few more episodes per series. We had, what, five episodes (the Africa special I count as one episode), and now we get to watch reruns until the fall? Makes me sad.

Netflix. 18 seasons. I never, ever get bored.


I have BBC America on cable, and the vast majority of programming is either Doctor Who (can't get bored, no matter what), The Professional Swearing Enthusiast (I get enough of that programming on Food Network), and Top Gear. I get loads of Top Gear every week. At any rate, I never get bored watching it.
 
2013-04-09 11:03:19 PM

maram500: God Is My Co-Pirate: sithon: Where were the guys from Top Gear when this happened?

Some say he draws life-sized models of his willy everywhere he goes. And some say he needs a lorry for each of his massive testicles. All we know is, he's called The Stig.

FTFY


Some say his flesh is as the flesh of asses, and that his issue is as the issue of horses.
 
2013-04-09 11:03:53 PM
So..........it's not Schumacher?
 
2013-04-09 11:03:58 PM
See kids, this is why we can't have nice things. Every time we get something, one of you brats, has to go and draw a giant penis on it.
 
2013-04-09 11:05:23 PM

Adolf Oliver Nipples: maram500: I was playing about in Forza 4 last week and went on the Nurburgring with--wait for it--a Fiat 500 Abarth. Posted a time of 9m 36s dead. And I did not draw a giant dong in the middle of a turning.

What the hell did you upgrade it to? That's a 13 minute car stock, and it probably handled like shiat.

/Bucket List achiever
//No, I don't have a life


I didn't upgrade it. Oh sure, in the corners it wasn't absolutely brilliant (for handling and outright speed I like a good continental European sports car or anything from Aston Martin), but it made a damn good time.

/Life? What's that?
//Took the C-apostrophe-D on the test track--1m 42s and change
///Would love to visit and actually take a few cars out
 
2013-04-09 11:07:08 PM
Giant penis causes closure of world-famous Nurburgring racing track

What, did a Porsche driver show up and start some shiat?
 
2013-04-09 11:07:33 PM

maram500: Adolf Oliver Nipples: maram500: I was playing about in Forza 4 last week and went on the Nurburgring with--wait for it--a Fiat 500 Abarth. Posted a time of 9m 36s dead. And I did not draw a giant dong in the middle of a turning.

What the hell did you upgrade it to? That's a 13 minute car stock, and it probably handled like shiat.

/Bucket List achiever
//No, I don't have a life

I didn't upgrade it. Oh sure, in the corners it wasn't absolutely brilliant (for handling and outright speed I like a good continental European sports car or anything from Aston Martin), but it made a damn good time.

/Life? What's that?
//Took the C-apostrophe-D on the test track--1m 42s and change
///Would love to visit and actually take a few cars out


On a track like the Nurburgring, the key thing is neither speed nor handling alone, but a mixture of those and a keen sense of where the hell you're going. And it helps to be driving through a controller. I'm fairly certain I would be as Clarksonius in the diesel Jaaag if I tried driving that circuit.
 
2013-04-09 11:08:13 PM

CtrlAltDestroy: Giant penis causes closure of world-famous Nurburgring racing track

What, did a Porsche driver show up and start some shiat?


He was driving a Cockster. So yes.
 
2013-04-09 11:13:39 PM
blogs.thenews.com.pk
 
2013-04-09 11:14:09 PM
www.carsession.comWhat about the other dongs?
 
2013-04-09 11:21:20 PM
So... James May was visiting again?
 
2013-04-09 11:21:37 PM
news.ripley.za.net

Get used to dee enn eff.
 
2013-04-09 11:23:46 PM

maram500: Adolf Oliver Nipples: How could anybody be offended by Top Gear? They're obviously playing parodies of themselves for comedic purposes, like Steven Colbert does every night. Complaining about guys playing at hooliganism is silly.

I don't believe they're "playing at" hooliganism. I think they're just being themselves, since anything else couldn't last this long. This means that I believe Jeremy Clarkson is that much of an ass and a stuck-up Merc enthusiast, Richard Hammond is a strange man with a puppy's level of attention, and James May is permanently living in 1952 and his fashion sense proves it.

Anyway, who cares? The show is just fantastic, but I really wish there were a few more episodes per series. We had, what, five episodes (the Africa special I count as one episode), and now we get to watch reruns until the fall? Makes me sad.


The show is great, certainly if you like to drive some of the old ones.
 
2013-04-09 11:34:23 PM

Anderson's Pooper: Yeah, I'd blame Clarkson and make him prove his innocence.


Actually, I think it's Captain Slow who hates everything Nurburgring.
 
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