If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Daily Mail)   Ladies, 88% of men like some shrubbery down there, just keep the garden well maintained   (dailymail.co.uk) divider line 380
    More: Interesting, Hollywood  
•       •       •

16786 clicks; posted to Main » on 09 Apr 2013 at 3:40 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



380 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | » | Last | Show all
 
2013-04-09 05:05:44 PM

Ryker's Peninsula: It's been so long since I've groomed down south, when I drop trou it looks like Pinocchio joined Al-Qaeda.


I'll be sending you specifications for the replacement keyboard, mouse, monitor, and coffee mug that you now owe me.

/also I am totally using that line at the first opportunity
 
2013-04-09 05:06:54 PM
I prefer to keep my man area at a reasonable length...makes it easier to shave a lightning bolt into it.
 
2013-04-09 05:10:04 PM
I do not mind if there is some nicely trimmed hair above, but I prefer no hair. If there is hair all around and a great deal of hair it can be a deal breaker or at least a deal delayer until she or I do some trimming. A razor job is fine it doesn't need to be waxed. Yes I am shaved bare down there, because most women like it and I wouldn't ask a woman to do anything that I would not.
 
2013-04-09 05:11:57 PM

H31N0US: Just laser that shiat off.


My ex tried doing the laser treatment. We couldn't notice a damn bit of difference and it was around $400 for the first session.
 
2013-04-09 05:12:17 PM
Team Shorn!

/body hair in general is kinda gross.
 
2013-04-09 05:12:19 PM

SultanofSchwing: I prefer to keep my man area at a reasonable length...makes it easier to shave a lightning bolt into it.


Hopefully the lightning bolt doesn't imply...ya know...fast?

"Shocking" would be a better interpretation.

Apparently I need to start drinking.
 
2013-04-09 05:13:43 PM
Hairy Twatter is an ironic nickname for me.  I prefer hardwood floors.
On On!
 
2013-04-09 05:15:41 PM
Nah. Pretty much all my experience has led me to believe fully shaved is the best bet.

Besides, hair makes vagazzling very difficult.
 
2013-04-09 05:17:01 PM

goatleggedfellow: Alphakronik: unlikely: So ladies, what's the other side of this coin? Do you prefer your men shaved? Waxed? Trimmed? Neatly curled with bows and ribbons?

From my experience, no woman likes licking a hairy nutsack.  They'll do it, they just won't like it.

So I should remove my +1 Cowl of Flossing?


Yes, people should brush their teeth and floss BEFORE sexytime.
 
2013-04-09 05:17:18 PM
When one is invited to the garden party, it is considered poor taste to comment on the state of the shrubbery.
 
2013-04-09 05:17:31 PM
I kept myself shaved (male) except for a little "pornstar patch" for a year or so.

Then came the ingrown hair/cyst/boil thing that made me feel like I was giving birth to a big angry baby.

It required professional attention, and the doc suggested I don't shave there anymore.  I comply.

/still keep myself neatly trimmed, though.
 
2013-04-09 05:18:39 PM

whistleridge: Bald is disturbing, it makes you look 5. 

A landing strip is lovely - enough hair to let me know you have it, not so much that it gets in the way. Keep it short enough that nothing goes up my nose while I'm down there, hmm?

Fully shaved on the side and back is also good - that's where most of the smell comes from.

'Neatly trimmed' is a minimum, though, not preferable. 

/ my $0.02


I second the landing strip!
 
2013-04-09 05:22:17 PM

Zul the Magnificent: I kept myself shaved (male) except for a little "pornstar patch" for a year or so.

Then came the ingrown hair/cyst/boil thing that made me feel like I was giving birth to a big angry baby.

It required professional attention, and the doc suggested I don't shave there anymore.  I comply.

/still keep myself neatly trimmed, though.


Use an electric shaver meant for that area.
 
2013-04-09 05:23:24 PM

Dumb-Ass-Monkey: Tanukis_Parachute: I will say this in bold and capitals-

IF YOU ARE A REDHEAD, YOU MUST NOT SHAVE IT ALL! THIS IS ONE OF THE REASONS THAT SOME OF US LOVE REDHEADS!

[i205.photobucket.com image 500x281]


But redheads have stinky snizzes. So do girls with oily foreheads.
 
2013-04-09 05:25:47 PM

TerminalEchoes: Dumb-Ass-Monkey: Tanukis_Parachute: I will say this in bold and capitals-

IF YOU ARE A REDHEAD, YOU MUST NOT SHAVE IT ALL! THIS IS ONE OF THE REASONS THAT SOME OF US LOVE REDHEADS!

[i205.photobucket.com image 500x281]

But redheads have stinky snizzes. So do girls with oily foreheads.


lol.  i misread that the first to through.  i thought the second sentence was advice.  like, avoid the redheads, but go do some oily foreheaded girls.
 
2013-04-09 05:27:12 PM
Hmm, currently undecided.  Impossible to tell with all that fake airbrushed stuff out there.  Guess it just needs some better examples... EIP
 
2013-04-09 05:27:54 PM

NFA: whistleridge: Bald is disturbing, it makes you look 5.

I you look at any adult woman and think of a 5 year old, you need to get help.


No, you need help when you look at a child and see a grown woman.

/No strong hair preference for hair
 
2013-04-09 05:28:23 PM
What's your views on a shorn butthole?
 
2013-04-09 05:30:40 PM

Shazam999: Thudfark: Shazam999: I like it bald.  Makes licking it so much easier.

Dude, aim lower

Hey, that's what your mom said.


Should have listened to good advice
 
2013-04-09 05:30:46 PM
President "Bobby": Mr. Gardner, do you agree with Ben, or do you think that we can stimulate growth through temporary incentives?
[Long pause]
Chance the Gardener: As long as the roots are not severed, all is well. And all will be well in the garden.
President "Bobby": In the garden.
Chance the Gardener: Yes. In the garden, growth has it seasons. First comes spring and summer, but then we have fall and winter. And then we get spring and summer again.
President "Bobby": Spring and summer.
Chance the Gardener: Yes.
President "Bobby": Then fall and winter.
Chance the Gardener: Yes.
Benjamin Rand: I think what our insightful young friend is saying is that we welcome the inevitable seasons of nature, but were upset by the seasons of our economy.
Chance the Gardener: Yes! There will be growth in the spring!
Benjamin Rand: Hmm!
Chance the Gardener: Hmm!
President "Bobby": Hm. Well, Mr. Gardner, I must admit that is one of the most refreshing and optimistic statements Ive heard in a very, very long time.[Benjamin Rand applauds]
President "Bobby": I admire your good, solid sense. Thats precisely what we lack on Capitol Hill.
 
2013-04-09 05:31:02 PM
You finicky Farkers probably prefer your pussy pre-chewed, too.

"SHADDUP AND EAT! There are perverts starving in Ethiopia!"

/omnivorous
//old
///need the fiber
 
2013-04-09 05:31:24 PM

namatad: aelfscine: And  wash.  It's not the hair, it's the hygiene.  I'm sure that goes equally for men.  Soap. Water. Washcloth. Regularly.

please
I bathe every day. Soap and water.
But sweat is sweat and if you have enough hair, it will get coated with the sweat, and the bacteria and fungus which is always present and TADA, odor.

I guess you could do an experiment.
scratch and sniff right after washing and then every hour.


but in the end, everyone is different.
some peeps have naturally sparse hair, some have jungles.
the total volume of hair probably has as much to do with smell as anything else.

/also, I love when the same women biatch about "he stinks", but "my cooter stench is NATURAL live with it".
/fark it, if it stinks, I wont be back often. If he/she/it stinks, FARKING TELL THEM. Unless it is so bad that you think you might die.....




If you even after decent care still have a problem, see your gyno, please. It could be a sign of an infection. And despite what Mr Ghetto said about picking up Summer's Eve at a WalMart, don't. It will make things worse.

/[TheMoreYouKnow.jpg]
 
2013-04-09 05:33:12 PM
I refuse to have body hair.of any kind.
 
2013-04-09 05:34:38 PM
Ladies it's called "high and tight"
 
2013-04-09 05:34:47 PM

BarkingUnicorn: You finicky Farkers probably prefer your pussy pre-chewed, too.

"SHADDUP AND EAT! There are perverts starving in Ethiopia!"

/omnivorous
//old
///need the fiber


This was poetry.
 
2013-04-09 05:35:08 PM

Thudfark: Shazam999: Thudfark: Shazam999: I like it bald.  Makes licking it so much easier.

Dude, aim lower

Hey, that's what your mom said.

Should have listened to good advice


I take it you've actually never licked pussy (or do a piss-poor job of it), because it's not just about shoving your tongue back and forth in the coont hole, but actually about licking the woman's clitoris.  Now see, that area is surrounded by hair, and you can also provide more sensation for your partner by pulling her clitoral hood back, which is also made much easier if there isn't hair around that region.

Maybe watch an instructional video or something.
 
2013-04-09 05:35:33 PM
so um HELP
the last two trimmers I bought TOTALLY SUCKED BALLZ ... and not in a good way
WTF, who makes a trimmer with pointy guards? ouch .... trimmmmmmm ouch ... fark this

anyone got a recommendation or two?
why you like them would be nice too

/links to amazon are bonus winners
/and NO, I am not wanting to trim with scissors either ... shudder ... I have enough problems with going to the ER
 
2013-04-09 05:35:41 PM
Hey, with bush (NSFW!) or without bush (NSFW!), I'm okay with either, so long as it looks good.
 
2013-04-09 05:35:53 PM

megarian: BarkingUnicorn: You finicky Farkers probably prefer your pussy pre-chewed, too.

"SHADDUP AND EAT! There are perverts starving in Ethiopia!"

/omnivorous
//old
///need the fiber

This was poetry.


Thanks, dear. I'm waiting for the "that's what your mom said" followup. :-)
 
2013-04-09 05:36:14 PM

lantawa: President "Bobby": Mr. Gardner, do you agree with Ben, or do you think that we can stimulate growth through temporary incentives?
[Long pause]
Chance the Gardener: As long as the roots are not severed, all is well. And all will be well in the garden.
President "Bobby": In the garden.
Chance the Gardener: Yes. In the garden, growth has it seasons. First comes spring and summer, but then we have fall and winter. And then we get spring and summer again.
President "Bobby": Spring and summer.
Chance the Gardener: Yes.
President "Bobby": Then fall and winter.
Chance the Gardener: Yes.
Benjamin Rand: I think what our insightful young friend is saying is that we welcome the inevitable seasons of nature, but were upset by the seasons of our economy.
Chance the Gardener: Yes! There will be growth in the spring!
Benjamin Rand: Hmm!
Chance the Gardener: Hmm!
President "Bobby": Hm. Well, Mr. Gardner, I must admit that is one of the most refreshing and optimistic statements Ive heard in a very, very long time.[Benjamin Rand applauds]
President "Bobby": I admire your good, solid sense. Thats precisely what we lack on Capitol Hill.


god it is time to rewatch that movie

Chance: I like to watch.
 
2013-04-09 05:37:24 PM
I'm one of those 88%. That is, assuming they meant "shrubbery" literally. I like a woman's bush to actually be made out of a bush, as in a short plant commonly used for ornamental or landscaping purposes.

Don't knock it until you've tried it. In springtime, when it's all flowering, it can be breathtaking. If you're looking to get started in the lifestyle, creative use of the seed paste from a Chia™ Pet is a good entry-level project.
 
2013-04-09 05:37:58 PM
AMEN!  bald is a turn-off
 
2013-04-09 05:38:43 PM
A little bit is okay, but I don't care for the "Abandoned house lot" or "Redneck trailer park" look. Sometimes, when she's feeling romantic, she'll go bald for me, just don't use my razors.
 
2013-04-09 05:38:52 PM

earthworm2.0: I refuse to have body hair.of any kind.


Only N00bs use the of method on the hair object.
 
2013-04-09 05:40:26 PM
www.funtasti.com
 
2013-04-09 05:40:57 PM

BarkingUnicorn: megarian: BarkingUnicorn: You finicky Farkers probably prefer your pussy pre-chewed, too.

"SHADDUP AND EAT! There are perverts starving in Ethiopia!"

/omnivorous
//old
///need the fiber

This was poetry.

Thanks, dear. I'm waiting for the "that's what your mom said" followup. :-)


Well, I already know what your mom said, so there's no need to brag.

Giggidy.

I am so sorry you had to hear that. I had to say it...
 
2013-04-09 05:42:45 PM

namatad: so um HELP
the last two trimmers I bought TOTALLY SUCKED BALLZ ... and not in a good way
WTF, who makes a trimmer with pointy guards? ouch .... trimmmmmmm ouch ... fark this

anyone got a recommendation or two?
why you like them would be nice too

/links to amazon are bonus winners
/and NO, I am not wanting to trim with scissors either ... shudder ... I have enough problems with going to the ER


Wahl makes an excellent variety of clippers and trimmers, all available with a variety of guards. They can be a little on the pricey side, but they work well, come with a guarantee, and last forever (with proper cleaning).

I used to help a friend with her maintenance in that area... was frequently rewarded.
 
2013-04-09 05:42:45 PM

Altair: AMEN!  bald is a turn-off


you know, in the end, this is preference and GGG
HE/SHE/IT  wants it one way and you refuse, well things might not work out.

Variety is the spice of life, my pron has all types. I miss natural, but scary hairy is well, FARKING SCARY. but that nasty shaved and red and 2 day stubble is just as bad or worse ...
 
2013-04-09 05:42:49 PM
A bare dessert - meh - inc crotch rot

A well manicured lawn - awesome

A wild untamed jungle full of vicious beasts - no thanks
 
2013-04-09 05:43:05 PM

Shazam999: Thudfark: Shazam999: Thudfark: Shazam999: I like it bald.  Makes licking it so much easier.

Dude, aim lower

Hey, that's what your mom said.

Should have listened to good advice

I take it you've actually never licked pussy (or do a piss-poor job of it), because it's not just about shoving your tongue back and forth in the coont hole, but actually about licking the woman's clitoris.  Now see, that area is surrounded by hair, and you can also provide more sensation for your partner by pulling her clitoral hood back, which is also made much easier if there isn't hair around that region.

Maybe watch an instructional video or something.


I have a pop-up book that taught me everything I need to know.

/just Chandler Binging.
 
2013-04-09 05:43:23 PM
I like a Hitler mustache, sue me.
 
2013-04-09 05:43:25 PM

Ryker's Peninsula: It's been so long since I've groomed down south, when I drop trou it looks like Pinocchio joined Al-Qaeda.


Lulz

/Enjoy
 
2013-04-09 05:43:31 PM

6502programmer: When one is invited to the garden party, it is considered poor taste to comment on the state of the shrubbery.


Eventually you will be asked to move in, then the game changes.
 
2013-04-09 05:46:35 PM
images.clipartof.com
 
2013-04-09 05:48:39 PM
I'm happy that you dopes get no say regarding my pubic hair.

And ladies, like your personality, your personal grooming preference is part of the package, he'll either love it or learn to deal with it if he wants to be with you.

He isn't leaving you over it.
 
2013-04-09 05:49:09 PM
It seems that there are a lot of people commenting here who, if they had been born 30 years earlier (or they were suddenly transported to a time 30 years earlier), would've never had sex because they would've been completely nauseated by the appearance that was common in 99% of the female crotches in the world at the time.  What a bunch of, no pun intended, little pussies.
 
2013-04-09 05:50:40 PM

Blushing Wall Flower: I'm happy that you dopes get no say regarding my pubic hair.

And ladies, like your personality, your personal grooming preference is part of the package, he'll either love it or learn to deal with it if he wants to be with you.

He isn't leaving you over it.


I went down on a woman once and got toilet paper in my mouth (front door).

Quiet the turn off.
 
2013-04-09 05:51:00 PM

bearded clamorer: Ryker's Peninsula: It's been so long since I've groomed down south, when I drop trou it looks like Pinocchio joined Al-Qaeda.

Lulz

/Enjoy


Gracias, amigo!  I'll try and pay it forward.
 
2013-04-09 05:51:20 PM
naplesseashellcompany.com

/Beards
 
2013-04-09 05:52:29 PM

kvinesknows: theflatline: I have very little pubic hair in the last 20 years, and even less when I lived in South America, and a girl apologized to me once on a chance encounter, for being two days between shaving.

I do prefer a little patch, but as someone else pointed out, my wife thinks hair on her cootch is a sin, so I guess I am stuck with wood floors 4 life.

Black chicks have pubes like berber carpet.

someone else pointed out that your wife thinks hair on her cootch is a sin?

go on...


should have said cootch hair.
 
Displayed 50 of 380 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report